So place  your attention on feeling the emotion, and check whether your
mind is holding  on to a grievance pattern such as blame, self-pity , or
resentment that is feeding the e motion. If that is the case, it means that
you haven’ t for given. Non-for gi veness is often toward another person or
yourself, but it m ay just as well be toward any situation or con dition —
past, present, or future — that your mind refuses to accept. Y es, there can
be nonfor givene ss even with regard to the future. This is the mind’ s
refusal to accept uncertainty , to accept that the future is u ltimately
beyond its control. For giveness is to relinquish your grievance and so tolet g o of  grief. It happens naturally once you realize that your grievance
serves no purpose except to strengthen a false sense of self. For giveness
is to of fer no resistance to life —  to allow life to live through you. The
alternatives are pain and suf fering, a greatly restricted flow of life
ener gy , and in many cases physical disease. The moment you truly for give, y ou have reclaimed your power from the
mind. Nonfor giveness is the very nature of the mind, just as the mind-
made false self, the ego, cannot survive without strife and conflict. The
mind cannot for give. Only you  can. Y ou become present, you enter your
body , you feel t he vibrant peace and stillness that emanate from  Being. That is why Jesus said: “Before you enter the temple, for give.”
YOUR LINK WITH THE UNMANIFESTED
What is the r elationship between pr esence and the inner body? Presence is pure consciousness —  consciousness that has been reclaimed
from the  mind, from the world of form. The inner body is your link with
the Unmanifeste d, and in its deepest aspect is  the Unmanifested: the
Source f rom wh ich consciousne ss emanates, as light emanates from the
sun. A wareness of the inner b ody is consciousness remembering its
origin and returning to the Source. Is the Unmanifested the same as Being? Y es. The  word Unmanifested  attempt s, by way of negation, to express
That wh ich cannot be spoken, th ought, or imagined. It points to what it is
by saying what it is not . Being , on the other hand, is a positive term. Please d on’ t get  attached to eit her of these words or start believing in
them. They are no more than signposts. Y ou said  that pr esence is consciousness that has been r eclaimed fr om the
mind. Who does the r eclaiming? Y ou do. But since in your essence you ar e  consciousness, we might as
well say  that it is an awakenin g of consciousness from the d ream of
form. This does not mean that y our own form will instantly van ish in an
explosion of light. Y ou can continue in your present form yet be aware of
the formless and deathless deep within you. I mu st a dmit that this is way beyond my compr ehension, and yet  on some
deeper level I se em to know wh at you ar e talking about. It’ s mor e like a
feeling than anything else. Am I deceiving myself? No, you are not . Feeling will get you closer to the truth of who you are
than thinking. I cannot tell yo u anything that deep within y ou don’ t
already know . When you have reached a certain stage of inner
connectedness, y ou recognize the truth when you hear it. If you  haven’ t
reached that stage yet, the practice of body awareness will bring about
the deepening that is necessary . SLOWING DOWN THE AGING PROCESS
In the meantime, awareness of the inner body has other benefits in the
physical realm. One of them is a significant slowing down of t he aging
of the physical body . Whereas the outer body normal ly appears to grow old and wither fairly
quickly , the inner body does not change with time, except that you may
feel it more deeply and become it more fully . If you are twenty years old
now , the ener gy field of your inn er body will feel just the same when you
are e ighty . It will be just as vibra ntly alive. As soon as your habitual state
changes from being out of the b ody and trapped in your mind to being inthe body and present in the Now , your physical body will feel lighter ,
clearer , more alive. As there is more consciousness in the body , its
molecular structure actually be comes less dense. More consciousness
means a lessening of the illusion of materiality . When y ou become identified more with the timeless inner body than
with the outer body , when presence becomes your normal mode of
consciousness a nd past and future no longer dominate your attention,
you do not accu mulate time anymore in your psyche and in the cells of
the b ody . The accumulation of t ime as the psychological burden of past
and futu re great ly impairs the c ells’ capacity for self-renewal. So if you
inhabit the inner body , the outer body will grow old at a much slower
rate, and even when it does, your timeless essence will shine through the
outer form, and you will not give the appearance of an old person. Is ther e any scientific evidence for this? T ry it out and you will be  the evidence. STRENGTHENING THE IMMUNE SYSTEM
Another benefit of this practice in the physical realm is a great
strengthening of the immune system, which occurs when you inhabit the
body . The more consciousness you bring into the body , the stronger the
immune system,  becomes. It is as if every cell awakens and rejo ices. The
body loves your attention. It is also a potent form of self-healing. Most
illnesses creep in when y ou are not prese nt in the body . If the master is
not present in the house, all kinds of shady characters will take up
residence there. When you inhabit your body , it will be hard for
unwanted guests to enter . It is not only yo ur physical immune system that becomes stren gthened;
your psychic immune system is greatly enhanced as well. The latter
protects you from the negative mental-emotional force fields of others,
which are highly contagious. I nhabiting the body protects you not by
putting u p a shield, but by raisi ng the frequency vibration of y our totalener gy field, so that anything that vibrates at a lower frequency , such as
fear , anger , depression, and so on, now exists in what is virtually a
dif ferent order of reality . It do esn’ t enter your field of consc iousness
anymore, or if it  does you don’ t need to of fer any resistance to i t because
it pa sses right through you. Please don’ t just accept or reject w hat I am
saying. Put it to the test. There is a simp le but powerful self-healing meditation that yo u can do
whenever you feel the need to boost your immune system. It is
particularly ef fective if used when you feel the first symptoms of an
illness, b ut it also works with ill nesses that are already entrenched if you
use it at frequ ent intervals and with an intense focus. It will also
counteract any disruption of your ener gy field by some form of
negativity . How ever , it is not a substitute for the moment-to-moment
practice of being in the bod y; otherwise, its ef fect will only be
temporary . Here it is. When yo u are unoccupied for a few minutes, and especially last thing at
night be fore falling asleep and first thing in the morning before getting
up, “floo d” your body with consciousness. Close your eyes. L ie flat on
your back. Choose dif ferent parts of your body to fo cus your attention on
briefly at first: hands, feet, arms, legs, abdomen, chest, head, and so on. Feel the  life ener gy inside those  parts as intensely as you can. S tay with
each par t for fifteen seconds or so. Then let your attention run  through
the body like a wave a few time s, from feet to head and back again. This
need only take a minute or so . After that, feel the inner body in its
totality , as a single field of ener gy . Hold that feeling for a few minutes. Be intensely present during that time, present in every cell of your body . Don’ t be  concerned if the mind  occasionally succeeds in drawing your
attention out of the body and you lose yourself in some thought. As soon
as you notice that this has hap pened, just return your attention to the
inner body . LET THE BREA TH T AKE YOU INT O THE BODY
At t imes, when my mind has been very active, it has acqui r ed such
momentum that I find it impossible to take my attention away fr o m it and
feel the inner bo dy . This happens particularly when I get into a worry or
anxiety pattern. Do you have any suggestions? If at any time you are finding it hard to get in touch with the inner body ,
it is usually easier to focus on your breathing first. Conscious breathing,
which is a powerful meditation i n its own right, will gradually put you in
touch w ith the body . Follow the breath with your attention as it moves in
and out of your body . Breathe into the body , and feel your abdomen
expanding and contracting slightly with each inhalation and exhalation. If y ou find it easy to visualize, close your eyes and see yourself
surrounded by light or immerse d in a luminous substance — a sea of
consciousness. Then breathe in that ligh t. Feel that luminous su bstance
filling u p your body and making it luminous also. Then gradually focus
more on  the feeling. Y ou are now  in your body . Don’ t get attached to any
visual image. CREA TIVE USE OF MIND
If yo u n eed to use your mind for  a specific purpose, use it in con junction
with your inner body . Only if you are able to be conscious  without
thought can you use your mind creatively , and the easiest way to enter
that state is through your body . Whenever an answer , a solution, or a
creative idea is n eeded, stop thinking for a moment by focusing attention
on your  inner ener gy field. Be come aware of the stillness. When you
resume thinking, it will be fresh and creative. In any thought activity ,
make it a habit to go back and  forth every few minutes or so between
thinking and an inner kind of lis tening, an inner stillness. W e c ould say:
don’ t just think with your head, think with your whole body . THE AR T OF LISTENING
When listening to another person, don’ t just listen with your mind, listen
with your whole body . Feel the ener gy field of your inner body as youlisten. T hat takes attention away from thinking and creates a still space
that ena bles you to truly listen without the mind interfering. Y ou are
giving the other person space —  space to be. It is the most precious gift
you can  give. Most people don’ t know how to listen because t he major
part of their attention is taken up  by thinking. They pay more attention to
that than to what the other person is saying, and none at all to what really
matters: the Being of the other person underneath the words  and the
mind. O f course, you cannot fe el someone else’ s Being except through
your ow n. This is the beginning of the realization of oneness, which is
love. At the deepest level of Being, you are one with all that is. Most hu man relationships consist mainly of minds interacting with each
other , not of hu man beings communicating, being in commu nion. No
relationship can  thrive in that way , and that is why there is so much
conflict in relationships. When the mind is running your life, conflict,
strife, and problems are inevitab le. Being in touch with your inner body
creates a clear space of no-m ind within which the relationship can
flower .CHAPTER SEVEN
P O R T A L S  I N T O
 T H E  U N M A N I F E S T E D
GOING DEEPL Y INT O THE BODY
I can feel the en er gy inside my body , especially in my arms and  legs, but
I don’ t seem to be able to go mor e deeply , as you suggested earlier . Make it into a m editation. It needn’ t take long. T en to fifteen m inutes of
clock time should be suf ficient. Make sure first that there are no external
distractions such  as telephones o r people who are likely to interrupt you. Sit o n a chair , but don’ t lean ba ck. Keep the spine erect. Doin g so will
help you  to stay alert. Alternati vely , choose your own favorite position
for meditation. Make su re the body is relaxed. Close your eyes. T ake a few deep  breaths. Feel yourself breathing into the lower abdomen, as it were. Observe how
it expan ds and contracts slightly with each in and out breath. Then
become aware of the entire inner ener gy field of the body . Don’ t think
about it — feel  it. By d oing this, you reclaim  consciousness from the
mind. If you fi nd it helpful, use the “light” visualization I described
earlier . When you can f eel the inner bo dy clearly as a single field of ener gy , let
go, if possible, of any visual image and focus exclusively on the feeling. If you can, also drop any mental image you may still have of the physical
body . A ll that is left then is an all-encompassing sense of presence or
“beingness,” and  the inner body  is felt to be without a bounda ry . Thentake your attention even more d eeply into that feeling. Become one with
it. Mer g e with the ener gy field , so that there is no longer a perceived
duality of the o bserver and the observed, of you and your b ody . The
distinction betw een inner and outer also dissolves now , so there is no
inner b ody anymore. By going deeply into the body , you have
transcended the body . Stay in this realm of pure Being for as long as feels comforta ble; then
become aware again of the physical body , your breathing and physical
senses, and open your eyes. Look at your surroundings for a few minutes
in a meditative way — that is,  without labeling them mentally — and
continue to feel the inner body as you do so. Having access to that formless realm is truly liberating. It frees you from
bondage to form and identif ication with form. It is life in its
undif ferentiated state prior to its fragmentation into multiplicity . W e may
call it the Unmanifested, the in visible Source of all things, t he Being
within all beings. It is a realm o f deep stillness and peace, but also of joy
and intense aliveness. Whenever you are present, you become
“transparent” to  some extent to the light, the pure conscious ness that
emanates from this Source. Y ou  also realize that the light is not  separate
from who you are but constitutes your very essence. THE SOURCE OF CHI
Is th e Un manifested what in the East is called chi, a kind of universal life
ener gy? No, it isn’ t. The Unmanifested  is the sour ce  of chi. Chi is the inner
ener gy f ield of your body . It is t he bridge between the outer yo u and the
Source. It lies halfway between the manifested, the world of form, and
the Unm anifested. Chi can be likened to a river or an ener gy stream. If
you take the focus of your consciousness deeply into the inner body , you
are tracing the course of this river back to its Source. Chi is m ovement;the Unm anifested is stillness. When you reach a point of absolute
stillness, which is nevertheless vibrant with life, you have gone beyond
the inne r body and beyond chi to the Source itself: the Unma nifested. Chi is the link between the Unmanifested and the physical universe. So i f yo u take your attention deeply into the inner body , you may reach
this po int, this singularity , where the world dissolves into the
Unmanifested an d the Unmanifested takes on form as the ener g y stream
of chi, which then becomes th e world. This is the point of birth and
death. When your consciousnes s is directed outward, mind and world
arise. W hen it is directed inward, it realizes its own Source an d returns
home into the Unmanifested. Then, when your consciousness comes
back to the manifested world, you reassume the form identity that you
temporarily relinquished. Y ou have a name, a past, a life situation, a
future. But in o ne essential respect, you are not the same person you
were before: Y ou will have glimpsed a reality within yourself that is not
“of this world,” although it isn’ t separate from it, just as it isn’ t separate
from you. Now let  your spiritual practice be this: As you go about your life, don’ t
give 100 percent of your attention to the external world and to your
mind. K eep som e within. I have  spoken about this already . Feel the inner
body even when engaged in everyday activities, especially when
engaged in relationships or when you are relating with nature. Feel the
stillness deep inside it. Keep the portal open. It is quite possible to be
conscious of the Unmanifested t hroughout your life. Y ou feel it as a deep
sense of peace somewhere in the background, a stillness that never
leaves you, no matter what happens out here. Y ou become a bridge
between the Unmanifested and the manifested, between God and the
world. This is the state of connectedness with the Source that we call
enlightenment. Don’ t get the impression that the Unmanifested is separate from the
manifested. How could it be? It is the life within every form, the inner
essence of all that exists. It pervades this world. Let me explain. DREAMLESS SLEEPY ou take a journey into the Unmanifested every night when you enter the
phase of deep d reamless sleep. Y ou mer ge with the Source. Y ou draw
from it the vital  ener gy that sus tains you for a while when you return to
the manifested, the world of separate forms. This ener gy is much more
vital tha n food: “Man does not live by bread alone.” But in dreamless
sleep, you don’ t go into it consc iously . Although the bodily functions are
still ope rating, “ you” no longer exist in that state. Can you imag ine what
it would be like to go into dreamless sleep with full consciousness? It is
impossible to imagine it, because that state has no content. The Unmanifest ed does not liberate you until you enter it consciously . That’ s why Jesus did not say: t he truth will make you free, but rather:
“Y ou wi ll know the truth, and th e truth will make you free.” This is not a
conceptual truth . It is the truth of eternal life beyond form, which is
known directly or not at all. But don’ t attempt to stay conscious in
dreamless sleep. It is highly unlikely that you will succeed. At most, you
may remain conscious during the dream phase, but not beyond that. This
is ca lled lucid dreaming, which may be interesting and fascinati ng, but it
is not liberating. So use your inner body as a portal through which you enter the
Unmanifested, and keep that portal open so that you stay connected with
the S ource at all  times. It makes no dif ference, as far as the inner body is
concerned, whe ther your outer physical body is old or young, frail or
strong. The inner body is timeless. If you are not yet able to feel the
inner body , use one of the other portals, although ultimately they are all
one. Som e I have spoken about at length already , but I’ll ment ion them
again briefly here. OTHER POR T ALS
The Now  can be seen as the mai n portal. It is an essential aspect of every
other portal, including the inn er body . Y ou cannot be in your body
without being intensely present in the Now . T ime an d the manifested are as inextricably linked as are the timeless
Now and the Unmanifested. When you dissolve psychological time
through intense present-moment awareness, you become conscious of
the Unmanifeste d both directly and indirectly . Directly , you feel  it as theradiance and power of your c onscious presence — no content, just
presence. Indire ctly , you are aware of the Unmanifested in and  through
the sensory realm. In other wo rds, you feel the God-essence in every
creature, every flower , every stone, and you realize: “All that is, is holy .”
This is why Jesus, speaking ent irely from his essence or Christ  identity ,
says in the Gospel of Thomas: “ Split a piece of wood; I am there. Lift up
a stone, and you will find me there.”
Another portal into the Unmanifested is created through the cessation of
thinking. This can start with a very simple thing, such as ta king one
conscious breath or looking, in a  state of intense alertness, at a flower , so
that ther e is no mental commentary running at the same time. T here are
many ways to c reate a gap in the incessant stream of thought. This is
what meditation  is all about. Thought is part of the realm of the
manifested. Continuous mind ac tivity keeps you imprisoned in the world
of fo rm and becomes an opaque  screen that prevents you from becoming
conscious of the Unmanifested,  conscious of the formless and timeless
God-essence in yourself and in all things and all creatures. When you are
intensely pr esent , you  don’ t need  to be concerned about the cessation of
thinking, of course, because th e mind then stops automatically . That’ s
why I said the Now is an essential aspect of every other portal. Surrender — the letting go of mental-emotional resistance to w hat is  —
also becomes a portal into the  Unmanifested. The reason for this is
simple: inner resistance cuts yo u of f from other people, from yourself,
from the world around you. It strengthens the feeling of separateness on
which the ego depends for its  survival. The stronger the fe eling of
separateness, the  more you are bound to the manifested, to the world of
separate forms. The more you are bound to the world of form, the harder
and more impenetrable your form  identity becomes. The portal is closed,
and you  are cut of f from the inner dimension, the dimension of depth. In
the s tate of surre nder , your form identity softens and becomes s omewhat
“transparent,” as it were, so the Unmanifested can shine through you. It’ s up to you to open a portal in your life that gives you conscious access
to the Unmanifested. Get in touch with the ener gy field of the inner body ,
be intensely present, disidentify from the mind, surrender to what is ;
these are all portals you can use — but you only need to use one. Sur ely love must also be one of those portals? No, it isn’ t. As soon as one of the portals is open, love is present in you
as th e “feeling-realization” of oneness. Love isn’ t a portal; it’ s what
comes thr ough  th e portal into t his world. As long as you are completely
trapped in your form identity , t here can be no love. Y our task is not to
search for love but to find a portal through which love can enter . SILENCE
Ar e ther e any other portals apart fr om those you just mentioned? Y es, there are. T he Unmanifested is not separate from the mani fested. It
pervades this world, but it is s o well disguised that almost everybody
misses it completely . If you know where to look, you’ll  find it
everywhere. A portal opens up every moment. Do y ou hear tha t dog barking i n the distance? Or that car passing by? Listen carefully . Can you feel the presence of the Unmanifested in that? Y ou can’ t? Look for it in the silence out of which the sounds come and
into which they return. Pay more attention to the silence than to the
sounds. Paying attention to oute r silence creates inner silence: the mind
becomes still. A portal is opening up. Every so und is born out of silence, dies back into silence, and d uring its
life span is surro unded by silence. Silence enables the sound to be. It is
an intrin sic but unmanifested part of every sound, every musical note,
every so ng, every word. The Unmanifested is present in this world as
silence. This is why it has been said that nothing in this world is so like
God as silence. All you have to  do is pay attention to it. Even during a
conversation, be come consciou s of the gaps between words, the brief
silent intervals between sentences. As you do that, the dimension of
stillness grows within you. Y ou  cannot pay attention to silence  without
simultaneously becoming still within. Silence without, stillness within. Y ou have entered the Unmanifested.SP ACE
Just as no sound can exist witho ut silence, nothing can exist wi thout no-
thing, w ithout the empty space that enables it to be. Every physical
object o r body has come out of  nothing, is surrounded by noth ing, and
will eve ntually return to nothing. Not only that, but even inside every
physical body there is far more “nothing” than “something.” Physicists
tell us that the solidity of matter is an illusion. Even seemingly solid
matter , i ncluding your physical body , is nearly 100 percent empty space
— so vast are t he distances between the atoms compared to t heir size. What is more, even inside every atom there is mostly empty spa ce. What
is le ft is  more like a vibrational frequency than particles of soli d matter ,
more lik e a musical note. Buddhists have known that for over 2,500
years. “Form is emptiness, emptiness is form,” states the Heart Sutra ,
one of the best known ancient Buddhist texts. The essence of all things is
emptiness. The Unm anifested is not only present in this world as silence; it also
pervades the entire physical universe as space — from within and
without. This is just as easy to miss as silence. Everybody pays attention
to the things in space, but who pays attention to space itself? Y ou seem to be  implying that “emptiness” or “nothing” is  not just
nothing, that ther e is some mysterious quality to it. What is this nothing? Y ou can not ask  such a question . Y our mind is trying to make nothing
into something. The moment you make it into something, y ou have
missed i t. Nothi ng — space — is the appearance of the Unmanifested as
an externalized phenomenon in a sense-perceived world. That’ s  about as
much as  one can say about it,  and even that is a kind of paradox. It
cannot become an object of knowledge. Y ou can’ t do a Ph.D. on
“nothing.” When scientists stu dy space, they usually make it into
something and thereby miss its essence entirely . Not surprisingly , the
latest th eory is that space isn’ t empty at all, that it is filled with somesubstance. Once you have a the ory , it’ s not too hard to find evidence to
substantiate it, at least until some other theory comes along. “Nothing” can only become a portal into the Unmanifested for you if you
don’ t try to grasp or understand it. Isn’ t that what we ar e doing her e? Not at all. I am giving you poin ters to show you how you can bring the
dimension of the Unmanifeste d into your life. W e are not trying to
understand it. There is nothing to understand. Space ha s no “existence.” “T o exist” literally means “to stand out.” Y ou
cannot understand space because it doesn’ t stand out. Although in itself
it has no existence, it enables everything else to exist. Silence has no
existence either , nor does the Un-manifested. So w hat happens if you withdraw attention from the objects in s pace and
become aware of space itself? What is the essence of this ro om? The
furniture, pictures, and so on are in  the room, but they are not the room. The floor , walls, and ceiling define the boundary of the room, but they
are not the room  either . So wha t is the essence of the room? Space, of
course, empty space. There wou ld be no “room” without it. Since space
is “nothing,” we can say that what is not  t he re is more important than
what is there. So  become aware of the space that is all around you. Don’ t
think about it. Feel it, as it were. Pay attention to “nothing.”
As you do that, a shift in consc iousness takes place inside you. Here is
why . The inner equivalent to o bjects in space such as furniture, walls,
and so on are your mind objects: thoughts, emotio ns, and the objects of
the sens es. And the inner equiv alent of space is the consciousness that
enables your mind objects to be , just as space allows all things to be. So
if y ou withdraw attention fro m things  — obj ects in space — you
automatically w ithdraw attentio n from your mind objects as well. In
other words: Y ou cannot think and  be aware of space — or of silence, for
that matter . By becoming awar e of the empty space around you, you
simultaneously become aware of the space of no-mind, of pureconsciousness: the Unmanifested. This is how the contemplation of
space can become a portal for you. Space an d silenc e are two aspec ts of the same thing, the same no-thing. They ar e an externalization of inner space and inner silence, which is
stillness: the infinitely creative womb of all existence. Most humans are
completely unconscious of this dimension. There is no inner space, no
stillness. They are out of balance. In other words, they know th e world,
or th ink they do , but they don’ t know God. They identify ex clusively
with the ir own physical and psychological form, unconscious of essence. And bec ause ev ery form is hig hly unstable, they live in fear . This fear
causes a  deep misperception of themselves and of other humans, a
distortion in their vision of the world. If so me cosmic convulsion bro ught about the end of our world, the
Unmanifested would remain to tally unaf fected by this. A Course in
Miracles  expresses this truth poignantly: “Nothing real can be
threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.”
If yo u remain in  conscious connection with the Unmanifested, you value,
love, an d deeply respect the manifested and every life form in it as an
expression of the One Life beyond form. Y ou also know th at every form
is destined to di ssolve again and that ultimately nothing out here matters
all th at much. Y ou have “overcome the world,” in the words of Jesus, or ,
as the Buddha put it, you have “crossed over to the other shore.”
THE TRUE NA TURE OF SP ACE AND TIME
Now consider this: If there were nothing but silence, it wouldn’ t exist for
you; you wouldn’ t know what  it is. Only when sound appears does
silence come into being. Simila rly , if there were only space without any
objects in space, it wouldn’ t exist for you. Imagine yourself as a point of
consciousness floating in the vastness of space — no stars, no galaxies,
just emptiness. Suddenly , space  wouldn’ t be vast anymore; it would not
be t here at all. There would be no speed, no movement from here to
there. At least two points of reference are needed for distance and space
to c ome into being. Space co mes into being the moment the One
becomes two, and as “two” be come the “ten thousand things,” as LaoT se calls the ma nifested world, space becomes more and more  vast. So
world and space arise simultaneously . Nothing could be  without space, yet space is nothing. Before the
universe came into being, before  the “big bang,” if you like, the re wasn’ t
a vast empty space waiting to be  filled. There was no space, as t here was
no t hing. There was only the U nmanifested — the One. When the One
became “the ten thousand things,” suddenly space seemed to be there
and enabled the many to be. Where did it come from? W as it created by
God to accomm odate the universe? Of course not. Space is no-thing, so
it was never created. Go out on a clear night and loo k up at the sky . The thousands of stars
you can see with  the naked eye are no more than an infinitesima l fraction
of what is there. Over 100 billion galaxies can already be detected with
the most powerful telescopes, each galaxy an “island univer se” with
billions of stars. Y et what is ev en more awe-inspiring is the in finity of
space itself, the depth and stillness that allows all of that magnificence to
be. Not hing co uld be more awe-inspiring and majestic than the
inconceivable vastness and stillness of space, and yet what is it? Emptiness, vast emptiness. What ap pears to  us as space in our universe perceived through the mind
and the senses is the Unmanifested itself, externalized. It is the “ body” of
God. An d the greatest miracle is this: That stillness and vastness that
enables the universe to be  is not just out there in space — it is also within
you. When you are utterly and totally pr esent , you encounter it as the
still inner space of no-mind. W ithin you, it is vast in depth, not in
extension. Spacial extension is ultimately a misperception of infinite
depth — an attribute of the one transcendental reality . Accor ding to Einstein, space a nd time ar e not separate. I don’ t r eally
understand it, but I think he is saying that time is the fourth dim ension of
space. He calls it the “space-time continuum.”
 Y es. What you perceive extern ally as space and time are ultimately
illusory , but they contain a core of truth. They are the two essential
attributes of God, infinity and eternity , perceived as if they  had an
external existence outside you. W ithin you, both space and time  have an
inner equivalent that reveals their true nature, as well as your own. Whereas space is the still, infinitely deep realm of no-mind, the inner
equivalent of time is presence, awareness of the eternal Now . Remember
that there is no  distinction between them. When space and time are
realized within as the Unmanifested — no-mind and presence —
external space and time continue  to exist for you, but they beco me much
less imp ortant. The world, too, continues to exist for you, but i t will not
bind you anymore. Hence, t he ultimate purpose of the world lies not within the wo rld but in
transcendence of the world. Just as you would not be conscious of space
if there  were no objects in space, the world is needed for the
Unmanifested to  be realized. Y ou may have heard the Buddhis t saying:
“If there were no illusion, there would be no enlightenment.” It is
through the world and ultimately through you  tha t the Unmanifested
knows itself. Y ou are here to enable the divine purpose of the un iverse to
unfold. That is how important you ar e! CONSCIOUS DEA TH
Apart fr om dreamless sleep, which I mentioned already , there is one
other inv oluntary portal. It opens up briefly at the time of physic al death. Even if you h ave missed all the other opportunities for spiritual
realization during your lifetime, one last portal will open up  for you
immediately after the body has died. There are countless accounts by  people who had a visual impression of
this portal as ra diant light and then returned from what is co mmonly
known as a near -death experience. Many of them also spoke of a sense
of blissful serenity and deep peace. In the T ibetan Book of the Dead , it is
described as “the luminous splendor of the colorless light of Emptiness,”
which it says is  “your own true self.” This portal opens up o nly very
briefly , and unless you have al ready encountered the dimension of the
Unmanifested in your lifetime, you will likely miss it. Most people carry
too muc h residual resistance, too much fear , too much attachment tosensory experience, too much identification with the manifested world. So they see the portal, turn aw ay in fear , and then lose consciousness. Most of what happens after that is involuntary and automatic. Eventually ,
there will be another round of birth and death. Their presenc e wasn’ t
strong enough yet for conscious immortality . So going thr ough this portal does not mean annihilation? As with all the other portals, your radiant true nature remains, but not the
personality . In any case, what ever is real or of true value in your
personality is your true natur e shining through. This is ne ver lost. Nothing that is of value, nothing that is r eal , is ever lost. Approaching death and death itself, the dissolution of the physical form,
is al ways a grea t opportunity for spiritual realization. This opportunity is
tragically missed most of the time, since we live in a cultur e that is
almost totally ignorant of death, as it is almost totally ignorant of
anything that truly matters. Every portal is a  portal of death, the death of the false self. When you go
through it, you cease to derive  your identity from your psych ological,
mind-made form . Y ou then real ize that death is an illusion, just as your
identification wi th form was an illusion. The end of illusion — that’ s all
that death is. It is painful only as long as you cling to illusion.CHAPTER EIGHT
E N L I G H T E N E D
 R E L A T I O N S H I P S
ENTER THE NOW FROM WHEREVER YOU ARE
I alw ays thought that true enlig htenment is not possible except thr ough
love in a r elation ship between a man and a woman. Isn’ t this wh at makes
us whole again? How can one’ s life be fulfilled until that happens? Is that true in your experience? Has this happened to you? Not yet, but how could it be otherwise? I know that it  will happen . In o ther words, you are waiting  for an event in time  t o save you. Is this
not the core err or that we hav e been talking about? Salvation is not
elsewhere in place or time. It is here and now . What do es that statement mean, “salvation is her e and now” ? I don’ t
understand it. I don’ t even know what salvation means . Most pe ople pur sue physical pleasures or various forms of psyc hological
gratification because they believe that those things will make them happy
or free them from a feeling of fear or lack. Happiness may be perceived
as a heightened sense of aliveness attained through physical pleasure, or
a m ore secure a nd more complete sense of self attained throu gh someform of psychological gratificat ion. This is the search for salvation from
a state of unsatisfactoriness or insuf ficiency . Invariably , any satisfaction
that they obtain is short-lived , so the condition of satisfa ction or
fulfillment is usually projected o nce again onto an imaginary po int away
from the here and now . “When I obtain this  o r am f ree of that  — then  I
will be okay .” T his is the uncon scious mind-set that creates the illusion
of salvation in the future. T rue salvation is fulfillment, pea ce, life in all its fullness. It is to be who
you are,  to feel within you the good that has no opposite, the joy of
Being that depends on nothing outside itself. It is felt not as a passing
experience but as an abiding presence. In theistic language, it is to “know
God” —  not as something ou tside you but as your own innermost
essence. T rue salvation is to know yourself as an inseparable part of the
timeless and formless One Lif e from which all that exists derives its
being. T rue salvation is a state of freedom — from fear , from suf fering, from a
perceived state of lack and insu f ficiency and therefore from all wanting,
needing, graspin g, and clinging. It is freedom from compulsive thinking,
from ne gativity , and above all from past and future as a psychological
need. Y our mind is telling you that you cannot get there from here. Something need s to happen, or  you need to become this or th at before
you can  be free and fulfilled. It  is saying, in fact, that you need  time —
that you need to find, sort out, do, achieve, acquire, bec ome, or
understand something before you can be free or complete. Y ou see time
as the means to salvation, whereas in truth it is the greatest obstacle to
salvation. Y ou think that you can ’ t get there from where and who you are
at this moment b ecause you are not yet complete or good enough, but the
truth is that here  and now is the only point from where you can  get there. Y ou “ge t” there by realizing tha t you ar e  there already . Y ou find God the
moment you realize that you do n’ t need to seek God. So there i s no only
way to salvation : Any condition can be used, but no particular condition
is neede d. How ever , there is on ly one point of access: the Now . There
can be no salvation away from t his moment. Y ou are lonely and  without
a pa rtner? Enter the Now from there. Y ou are in a relationship? Enter the
Now from there. There is  nothing you can ever do or attain that will get you closer to
salvation than it is at this moment. This may be hard to grasp for a mindaccustomed to thinking that everything worthwhile is in the future. Nor
can anything that you ever did or that was done to you in the past prevent
you from  saying  yes to what is  and taking your attention deeply into the
Now . Y ou cannot do this in the future. Y ou do it now or not at all. LOVE/HA TE RELA TIONSHIPS
Unless a nd until you access the consciousness frequency of pre sence, all
relationships, an d particularly intimate relationships, are deepl y flawed
and ultimately dysfunctional. They may see m perfec t for a while, such as
when yo u are “in love,” but invariably that apparent perfec tion gets
disrupted as ar guments, conflicts, dissatisfaction, and emotional or even
physical violence occur with increasing frequency . It seems that most
“love re lationships” become love/hate relationships before long. Love
can then turn into savage attack, feelings of hostility , or complete
withdrawal of af fection at the flick of a switch. This is co nsidered
normal. The relationship then o scillates for a while, a few months or a
few years, between the polaritie s of “love” and hate, and it give s you as
much pl easure as it gives you pain. It is not uncommon for couples to
become addicte d to those cycles. Their drama makes them fe el alive. When a balance  between the po sitive/negative polarities is lost and the
negative, destru ctive cycles occur with increasing frequency and
intensity , which tends to happen  sooner or later , then it will not be long
before the relationship finally collapses. It m ay a ppear th at if you could only eliminate the negative or de structive
cycles, then all would be well and the relationship would flower
beautifully — but alas, this is n ot possible. The polarities are mutually
interdependent. Y ou cannot ha ve one without the other . The positive
already contains  within itself the as yet unmanifested negative. Both are
in fact dif ferent aspects of the same dysfunction. I am speaking here of
what are commonly called romantic relationships — not of true love,
which has no opposite because i t arises from beyond the mind. Love as a
continuous state  is as yet very rare — as rare as conscious human beings. Brief an d elusive glimpses of lo ve, however , are possible whenever there
is a gap in the stream of mind.The negative side of a rela tionship is, of course, more easily
recognizable as dysfunctional than the positive one. And it is also easier
to re cognize the source of negativity in your partner than to see it in
yourself. It can manifest in many forms: possessiveness, jealousy ,
control, withdrawal and unspoken resentment, the need to be right,
insensitivity and self-absorption, emotional demands and manipulation,
the ur ge  to ar gue, criticize, judg e, blame, or attack, anger , unconscious
revenge for past pain inflicted by a parent, and rage and physical
violence. On the positive s ide, you are “in  love” with your partner . This is at first a
deeply satisfyin g state. Y ou fe el intensely alive. Y our existence has
suddenly become meaningful because someone needs you, wants you,
and makes you feel special, and you do the same for him or her . When
you are together , you feel whole . The feeling can become so intense that
the rest of the world fades into insignificance. However , you may also have noticed that there is a neediness and a
clinging quality to that intensity . Y ou become addicted to the other
person. He or she acts on you like a drug. Y ou are on a high when the
drug is available, but even the possibility or the thought that h e or she
might no longer be there for y ou can lead to jealousy , possessiveness,
attempts at manipulation through emotional blackmail, blam ing and
accusing — fear of loss. If the o ther person does leave you, this  can give
rise to the most intense hostility or the most profound grief and  despair . In an instant, loving tenderness can turn into a savage attack or dreadful
grief. Where is the love now? Can love change into its oppos ite in an
instant? W as it love in the first place, or just an addictive grasping and
clinging? ADDICTION AND THE SEARCH FOR WHOLENESS
Why should we become addicted to another person? The reason why the romantic love relationship is such an intense and
universally sought-after experience is that it seems to of fer liberation
from a deep-seated state of fear , need, lack, and incompletene ss that ispart of the hum an condition in its unredeemed and unenlightened state. There is a physical as well as a psychological dimension to this state. On the physical level, you are ob viously not whole, nor will you ever be:
Y ou are either a man or a woma n, which is to say , one-half of the whole. On this level, the longing for wholeness — the return to on eness —
manifests as male-female attraction, man’ s need for a woman, woman’ s
need for a man . It is an almost irresistible ur ge for union with the
opposite ener gy polarity . The ro ot of this physical ur ge is a spir itual one:
the long ing for an end to duality , a return to the state of wholeness. Sexual union is the closest you can get to this state on the physical level. This is why it is  the most deeply  satisfying experience the physical realm
can of fer . But sexual union is no more than a fleeting gli mpse of
wholeness, an instant of bliss. A s long as it is unconsciously sought as a
means o f salvat ion, you are seeking the end of duality on the level of
form, w here it cannot be found. Y ou are given a tantalizing gl impse of
heaven, but you are not allowed to dwell there, and find yourself again in
a separate body . On t he psychological level, the sense of lack and incompleten ess is, if
anything, even greater than on  the physical level. As long as you are
identified with the mind, you h ave an externally derived sense of self. That is to say , you get your sense of who you are from things that
ultimately have nothing to do with who you are: your social role,
possessions, external appearance, successes and failures, belief  systems,
and so on. This false, mind-made self, the ego, feels vulnerable, insecure,
and is always seeking new things to identify with to give it a feeling that
it ex ists. But nothing is ever enough to give it lasting fulfillmen t. Its fear
remains; its sense of lack and neediness remains. But then  that special relationship  comes along. It seems to be th e answer
to all the ego’ s problems and to meet all its needs. At least this is how it
appears at first. All the other th ings that you derived your sens e of self
from before now become relativ ely insignificant. Y ou now have a single
focal po int that replaces them all, that gives meaning to your life, and
through which you define your identity: the person you are “in love”
with. Y o u are no longer a disconnected fragment in an uncaring universe,
or so  it seems. Y our world now has a center: the loved one. The fact that
the center is outside you and that, therefore, you still have an externally
derived sense of self does not seem to matter at first. What matte rs is thatthe underlying feelings of incompleteness, of fear , lack, and
unfulfillment so  characteristic of the egoic state are no longer th ere — or
are they? Have they dissolved, or do they continue to exist un derneath
the happy surface reality? If in your relationships you experience both “love” and the opposite of
love — attack, e motional violen ce, and so on — then it is likely that you
are confusing ego attachment and addictive clinging with lo ve. Y ou
cannot l ove you r partner one m oment and attack him or her the next. T rue love has no opposite. If your “love” has an opposite, then it is not
love but a strong  ego-need for a  more complete and deeper sense of self,
a need that the other person temporarily meets. It is the ego’ s substitute
for salvation, and for a short time it almost does feel like salvation. But there comes a point when your partner behaves in ways th at fail to
meet yo ur needs, or rather those of your ego. The feelings of fear , pain,
and lack that are an intrinsic part of egoic consciousness but had been
covered up by the “love relation ship” now resurface. Just as w ith every
other addiction,  you are on a high when the drug is avail able, but
invariably there  comes a time when the drug no longer works for you. When those painful feelings reappear , you feel them even more strongly
than bef ore, and  what is more,  you now perceive your partn er as the
cause  o f those feeling s. This means that you project them outward and
attack th e other with all the savage violence that is part of y our pain. This attack may awaken the partner ’ s own pain, and he or she may
counter your attack. At this point, the ego is still unconsciously hoping
that its attack or its attempts at manipulation will be suf ficient
punishment to induce your partn er to change their behavior , so that it can
use them again as a cover -up for your pain. Every addiction  arises from an unconscious refusal to face a nd move
through your own pain. Every addiction starts with pain and e nds with
pain. Whatever the substance you are addicted to — alcohol, food, legal
or illega l drugs, or a person — you are using something or som ebody to
cover up your pain. That is why , after the initial euphoria has passed,
there is so muc h unhappiness, so much pain in intimate relationships. They do not cause pain and unhappiness. They bring out  th e pain and
unhappiness tha t is already in you. Every addiction does tha t. Every
addiction reache s a point where  it does not  work for you anymore, and
then you feel the pain more intensely than ever .This is one reaso n why most peo ple are always trying to escape from the
present moment  and are seeking some kind of salvation in the future. The first thing that they might encounter if they focused their attention
on the Now is t heir own pain, and this is what they fear . If t hey only
knew how easy it is to access in the Now the power of presence that
dissolves the past and its pain, the reality that dissolves the il lusion. If
they onl y knew  how close they are to their own reality , how close to
God. A voidance of relationships in an  attempt to avoid pain is not th e answer
either . The pain is there anywa y . Three failed relationships in as many
years are more l ikely to force y ou into awakening than three years on a
desert is land or shut away in your room. But if you could bring intense
presence into your aloneness, that would work for you too. FROM ADDICTIVE T O ENLIGHTENED RELA TIONSHIPS
Can we change an addictive r elationship into a true one? Y es. Being present and inten sifying your presence by taking your
attention ever more deeply into  the Now: Whether you are living alone
or with a partner , this remains t he key . For love to flourish, the light of
your pre sence n eeds to be strong enough so that you no longer get taken
over by the thin ker or the pain-body and mistake them for who you are. T o know yourself as the Being underneath the thinker , the stillness
underneath the mental noise, the love and joy underneath the  pain, is
freedom, salvation, enlightenment. T o disidentify from the pain-body is
to br ing presence into the pain a nd thus transmute it. T o disiden tify from
thinking is to be the silent watcher of your thoughts and behavior ,
especially the repetitive patterns of your mind and the roles played by the
ego. If you stop investing it with “selfness,” the mind loses its compulsive
quality , which basically is the compulsion to judge, and so to resist whatis , wh ich creates c onflict, drama, and new pain. In fact, the mom ent that
judgment stops through acceptance of what is , you  are  free of the mind. Y ou hav e made room for love, f or joy , for peace. First you stop judging
yourself; then you stop judging your partner . The greatest catalyst for
change in a relationship is complete acceptance of your partner as he or
she is, without needing to judge or change them in any way . That
immediately takes you beyond ego. All mind games and all addictive
clinging are then over . There  are no victims and no perpetrators
anymore, no accuser and accused. This is also the end  of all
codependency , of being drawn into somebody else’ s unconscious pattern
and thereby enabling it to continue. Y ou will then either separate — in
love — or move ever more deep ly into the Now together — into Being. Can it be that simple? Y es, it is that simple. Love is a state of Being. Y our l ove is not outside; it is deep within you. Y ou can  never lose it, and it c annot leave you. It is not dependent on
some ot her body , some external form. In the stillness of your presence,
you can feel you r own formless and timeless reality as the unm anifested
life that animates your physical form. Y ou can then feel the same life
deep wi thin every other human and every other creature. Y ou look
beyond the veil of form and separation. This is the realization of oneness. This is love. What is  God? The eternal One Life underneath all the forms of life. What is love? T o feel the presence of that One Life deep within  yourself
and within all creatures. T o be it. Therefore, all love is the love of God. Love is not selective, just as the  light of the sun is not selective. It does
not make one person special. It is not exclusive. Exclusivity is not the
love of God but the “love” of ego. However , the intensity with which
true lov e is felt can vary . There may be one person who refle cts your
love back to you  more clearly an d more intensely than others, and if that
person feels the same toward you, it can be said that you are in a love
relationship with him or her . The bond that connects you with that person
is the same bond that connects y ou with the person sitting next to you ona bu s, o r with a bird, a tree, a f lower . Only the degree of inten sity with
which it is felt dif fers. Even in an other wise addictive relationship, there may be moments when
something more real shines through, something beyond your mutual
addictive needs. These are moments when both your and your partner ’ s
mind bri efly sub side and the pai n-body is temporarily in a dormant state. This ma y sometimes happen during physical intimacy , or when you are
both wit nessing the miracle of c hildbirth, or in  the  presenc e of death, or
when one of y ou is seriously ill — anything that renders t he mind
powerless. When this happens , your Being, which is usually buried
underneath the mind, becomes revealed, and it is this that m akes true
communication possible. T rue communication is communion — the realization of oneness, which
is love. Usually , this is quickly lost again, unless you are able to stay
present e nough to keep out the mind and its old patterns. As so on as the
mind and mind identification r eturn, you are no longer yours elf but a
mental image of yourself, and you start playing games and roles again to
get y our ego needs met. Y ou are a human mind again, pretending to be a
human being, interacting with another mind, playing a drama called
“love.”
Although brief glimpses are possible, love cannot flourish unless you are
permanently free of mind identification and your presence is intense
enough to have dissolved the pain-body — or you can at least remain
present as the w atcher . The pain-body cannot then take you over and so
become destructive of love. RELA TIONSHIPS AS SPIRITUAL PRACTICE
As the egoic m ode of consciousness and all the social, political, and
economic struct ures that it created enter the final stage of collapse, the
relationships between men and women reflect the deep state of  crisis in
which humanity  now finds itself. As humans have become increasingly
identified with their mind, most relationships are not rooted in Being and
so turn into a s ource of pain a nd become dominated by problems and
conflict.Millions are now living alone or as single parents, unable to establish an
intimate relationship or unwilling to repeat the insane drama of past
relationships. O thers go from one relationship to another , from one
pleasure-and-pain cycle to ano ther , in search of the elusive goal of
fulfillment through union with the opposite ener gy polarity . Still others
compromise and continue to be together in a dysfunctional relationship
in w hich negativity prevails, f or the sake of the children or security ,
through force of habit, fear of being alone, or some other mutually
“beneficial” arrangement, or even through the unconscious addiction to
the excitement of emotional drama and pain. However , every crisis represents  not only danger but also opportunity . If
relationships ener gize and magn ify egoic mind patterns and activate the
pain-body , as they do at this tim e, why not accept this fact rather than try
to e scape from it? Why not cooperate with it instead of avoiding
relationships or continuing to pursue the phantom of an ideal partner as
an answer to your problems or a means of feeling fulfilled? The
opportunity that is concealed within every crisis does not manifest until
all the facts of a ny given situation are acknowledged and fully accepted. As long as you deny them, as long as you try to escape from them or
wish that things were dif ferent, the window of opportunity does not open
up, and you rem ain trapped inside that situation, which will remain the
same or deteriorate further . W ith the acknowledgment and  acceptance of the facts also comes a
degree o f freedom from them. For example, when you know  there is
disharmony and you hold that “knowing,” through your knowing a new
factor has come in, and the dish armony cannot remain unchange d. When
you know  you are n ot at peace , your knowing creates a still space that
surrounds your nonpeace in a  loving and tender embrace and then
transmutes your  nonpeace into peace. As far as inner transform ation is
concerned, there is nothing you can do  a bout it. Y ou c annot transform
yourself, and you certainly can not transform your partner or anybody
else. All  you can  do is create a space for transformation to happen, for
grace and love to enter . So whenever your relationship i s not working, whenever it bring s out the
“madness” in you and in your p artner , be glad. What was uncon scious is
being brought up to the light. It is an opportunity for salvation. Every
moment, hold the knowing of that moment, particularly of your inner
state. If  there is anger , know  that there is anger . If there is jealousy ,
defensiveness, the ur ge to ar gue, the need to be right, an inner child
demanding love and attention, or emotional pain of any kind — whatever
it is, know  the  reality of that moment and hold the knowing. The
relationship then becomes your sadhana , y our spiritual practice. If you
observe unconscious behavior in your partner , hold it in the loving
embrace of your knowing so tha t you won’ t react. Unconsciousness and
knowing cannot coexist for long — even if the knowing is only in the
other pe rson and  not in the one who is acting out the unconsc iousness. The ener gy form that lies behind hostility and attack finds the presence
of love absolutely intolerable. If you react at all to your partner ’ s
unconsciousness, you become unconscious yourself. But if you then
remember to know  your reaction, nothing is lost. Humanity is under great pressur e to evolve because it is our onl y chance
of surviv al as a race. This will a f fect every aspect of your life and close
relationships in particular . Never before have relationships been as
problematic and  conflict ridden as they are now . As you may have
noticed, they are not here to make you happy or fulfilled. If you  continue
to pursu e the goal of salvation through a relationship, you  will be
disillusioned ag ain and again. B ut if you accept that the relationship is
here to make you conscious  instead of happy , then the relationship will
of fer you salvation, and you w ill be aligning yourself with the higher
consciousness th at wants to be born into this world. For those w ho hold
on to the old pa tterns, there will be increasing pain, violence, c onfusion,
and madness. I su ppose that it takes two to  make a r elationship into a spiritual
practice, as you suggest. For example, my partner is still acting out his
old patterns of jealousy and contr ol. I have pointed this out many times,
but he is unable to see it . How ma ny people does it take to make your life into a spiritual practice? Never m ind if your partner will  not cooperate. Sanity — consciousness
— can only come into this world through you. Y ou do not need to wait
for the world to become sane, or for somebody else to become conscious,
before y ou can be enlightened. Y ou may wait forever . Do not accuse
each oth er of being unconscious. The moment you start to ar gue, you
have ide ntified with a mental p osition and are now defending not only
that position but also your sense of self. The ego is in char ge. Y ou have
become unconscious. At times, it may be appropriate to point out certain
aspects of your partner ’ s behavior . If you are very alert, very present,
you can do so without ego involvement — without blaming, accusing, or
making the other wrong. When y our partner behaves unconsciously , relinquish all j udgment. Judgment is either to confuse so meone’ s unconscious behavior with who
they are or to project your own u nconsciousness onto another pe rson and
mistake that  for who they are. T o relinquish judgment does not mean that
you do not reco gnize dysfunctio n and unconsciousness when you see it. It m eans “being the knowing” rather than “being the reaction”  and the
judge. Y ou will then either be totally free of reaction or you m ay react
and still  be the knowing, the space in which the reaction is wat ched and
allowed to be. Instead of fighting the darkness, you bring in the light. Instead of reacting to delusion, you see the delusion yet at the same time
look through it. Being the kn owing creates a clear space o f loving
presence that allows all things and all people to be as they  are. No
greater catalyst for transformation exists. If you practice th is, your
partner cannot stay with you and  remain unconscious. If you both agree that the relationship will be your spiritual practice, so
much th e better . Y ou can then express your thoughts and feeling s to each
other as soon as they occur , or as soon as a reaction comes up , so that
you do not create a time gap in which an unexpressed or
unacknowledged emotion or gr ievance can fester and grow . Learn to
give expression to what you feel without blaming. Learn to listen to your
partner in an o pen, nondefensive way . Give your partner space for
expressing himself or herself. Be present. Accusing, defending, attacking
— all those patterns that are des igned to strengthen or protect the ego or
to ge t its  needs met will then be come redundant. Giving space to others
— and to yourself — is vital. Love  cannot flourish without it. Whe n youhave removed the two factors that are destructive to relationships —
when the pain-body has been  transmuted and you are n o longer
identified with mind and ment al positions — and if your partner has
done th e same, you will experience the bliss of the flowering of
relationship. Instead of mirror ing to each other your pain and your
unconsciousness, instead of satisfying your mutual addictive ego needs,
you will reflect back to each other the love that you feel deep within, the
love that comes with the realization of your oneness with all that is. This
is the love that has no opposite. If your partner is still identified with the mind and the pain-body while
you are already free, this will re present a major challenge — not to you
but to your part ner . It is not easy to live with an enlightened p erson, or
rather it is so  easy that the ego finds it extrem ely threatening. Remember
that the ego nee ds problems, conflict, and “enemies” to strengthen the
sense of separateness on which its identity depends. The unenlightened
partner ’ s mind will be deeply f rustrated because its fixed positions are
not resisted, which means they will become shaky and weak, and there is
even the “danger” that they may  collapse altogether , resulting in loss of
self. The pain-body is demanding feedback and not getting it. The need
for a r gument, drama, and conflict is not being met. But beware: Some
people w ho are unresponsive, withdrawn, insensitive, or cut of f from
their feelings may think and try to convince others that they are
enlightened, or at least that th ere is “nothing wrong” with them and
everything wrong with their partner . Men tend to do that more than
women. They may see their female partners as irrational or emotional. But if you can feel your emotions, you are not far from the radiant inner
body just underneath. If you are mainly in your head, the distance is
much greater , and you need to bring consciousness into the emotional
body before you can reach the inner body . If th ere isn’ t an emanation of  love and joy , complete prese nce and
openness toward all beings, then it is not enlightenment. Another
indicator is how a person behaves in dif ficult or challenging situations or
when things “go wrong.” If your “enlightenment” is egoic self-delusion,
then life will s oon give you a challenge that will bring out your
unconsciousness in whatever form — as fear , anger , defensiveness,
judgment, depre ssion, and so o n. If you are in a relationship, many of
your challenges will come throu gh your partner . For example, a womanmay be challeng ed by an unres ponsive male partner who lives almost
entirely in his head. She will be challenged by his inability to hear  her , to
give her attention and space to be, which is due to his lack of presence. The abse nce of love in the relati onship, which is usually more ke enly felt
by a woman than a man, will trigger the woman’ s pain-body , and through
it she will attack her partner — blame, criticize, make wrong, a nd so on. This in turn now becomes his  challenge.
_OceanofPDF.com_The_Power_of_Now__A_Guide_to_Spiritual_Enl_-_Eckhart_Tolle.txt
Summarize the following text section accurately and concisely. Maintain specific details and numerical information, and use anti-repetition mechanisms:

        So place  your attention on feeling the emotion, and check whether your
mind is holding  on to a grievance pattern such as blame, self-pity, or
resentment that is feeding the e motion. If that is the case, it means that
you haven’ t for given. Non-for gi veness is often toward another person or
yourself, but it m ay just as well be toward any situation or con dition —
past, present, or future — that your mind refuses to accept. Y es, there can
be nonfor givene ss even with regard to the future. This is the mind’ s
refusal to accept uncertainty, to accept that the future is u ltimately
beyond its control. For giveness is to relinquish your grievance and so tolet g o of  grief. It happens naturally once you realize that your grievance
serves no purpose except to strengthen a false sense of self. For giveness
is to of fer no resistance to life —  to allow life to live through you. The
alternatives are pain and suf fering, a greatly restricted flow of life
ener gy, and in many cases physical disease. The moment you truly for give, y ou have reclaimed your power from the
mind. Nonfor giveness is the very nature of the mind, just as the mind-
made false self, the ego, cannot survive without strife and conflict. The
mind cannot for give. Only you  can. Y ou become present, you enter your
body, you feel t he vibrant peace and stillness that emanate from  Being. That is why Jesus said: “Before you enter the temple, for give. ”
YOUR LINK WITH THE UNMANIFESTED
What is the r elationship between pr esence and the inner body. Presence is pure consciousness —  consciousness that has been reclaimed
from the  mind, from the world of form. The inner body is your link with
the Unmanifeste d, and in its deepest aspect is  the Unmanifested: the
Source f rom wh ich consciousne ss emanates, as light emanates from the
sun. A wareness of the inner b ody is consciousness remembering its
origin and returning to the Source. Is the Unmanifested the same as Being. Y es. The  word Unmanifested  attempt s, by way of negation, to express
That wh ich cannot be spoken, th ought, or imagined. It points to what it is
by saying what it is not. Being, on the other hand, is a positive term. Please d on’ t get  attached to eit her of these words or start believing in
them. They are no more than signposts. Y ou said  that pr esence is consciousness that has been r eclaimed fr om the
mind. Who does the r eclaiming. Y ou do. But since in your essence you ar e  consciousness, we might as
well say  that it is an awakenin g of consciousness from the d ream of
form. This does not mean that y our own form will instantly van ish in an
explosion of light. Y ou can continue in your present form yet be aware of
the formless and deathless deep within you. I mu st a dmit that this is way beyond my compr ehension, and yet  on some
deeper level I se em to know wh at you ar e talking about. It’ s mor e like a
feeling than anything else. Am I deceiving myself. No, you are not. Feeling will get you closer to the truth of who you are
than thinking. I cannot tell yo u anything that deep within y ou don’ t
already know. When you have reached a certain stage of inner
connectedness, y ou recognize the truth when you hear it. If you  haven’ t
reached that stage yet, the practice of body awareness will bring about
the deepening that is necessary. SLOWING DOWN THE AGING PROCESS
In the meantime, awareness of the inner body has other benefits in the
physical realm. One of them is a significant slowing down of t he aging
of the physical body. Whereas the outer body normal ly appears to grow old and wither fairly
quickly, the inner body does not change with time, except that you may
feel it more deeply and become it more fully. If you are twenty years old
now, the ener gy field of your inn er body will feel just the same when you
are e ighty. It will be just as vibra ntly alive. As soon as your habitual state
changes from being out of the b ody and trapped in your mind to being inthe body and present in the Now, your physical body will feel lighter,
clearer, more alive. As there is more consciousness in the body, its
molecular structure actually be comes less dense. More consciousness
means a lessening of the illusion of materiality. When y ou become identified more with the timeless inner body than
with the outer body, when presence becomes your normal mode of
consciousness a nd past and future no longer dominate your attention,
you do not accu mulate time anymore in your psyche and in the cells of
the b ody. The accumulation of t ime as the psychological burden of past
and futu re great ly impairs the c ells’ capacity for self-renewal. So if you
inhabit the inner body, the outer body will grow old at a much slower
rate, and even when it does, your timeless essence will shine through the
outer form, and you will not give the appearance of an old person. Is ther e any scientific evidence for this. T ry it out and you will be  the evidence. STRENGTHENING THE IMMUNE SYSTEM
Another benefit of this practice in the physical realm is a great
strengthening of the immune system, which occurs when you inhabit the
body. The more consciousness you bring into the body, the stronger the
immune system,  becomes. It is as if every cell awakens and rejo ices. The
body loves your attention. It is also a potent form of self-healing. Most
illnesses creep in when y ou are not prese nt in the body. If the master is
not present in the house, all kinds of shady characters will take up
residence there. When you inhabit your body, it will be hard for
unwanted guests to enter. It is not only yo ur physical immune system that becomes stren gthened;
your psychic immune system is greatly enhanced as well. The latter
protects you from the negative mental-emotional force fields of others,
which are highly contagious. I nhabiting the body protects you not by
putting u p a shield, but by raisi ng the frequency vibration of y our totalener gy field, so that anything that vibrates at a lower frequency, such as
fear, anger, depression, and so on, now exists in what is virtually a
dif ferent order of reality. It do esn’ t enter your field of consc iousness
anymore, or if it  does you don’ t need to of fer any resistance to i t because
it pa sses right through you. Please don’ t just accept or reject w hat I am
saying. Put it to the test. There is a simp le but powerful self-healing meditation that yo u can do
whenever you feel the need to boost your immune system. It is
particularly ef fective if used when you feel the first symptoms of an
illness, b ut it also works with ill nesses that are already entrenched if you
use it at frequ ent intervals and with an intense focus. It will also
counteract any disruption of your ener gy field by some form of
negativity. How ever, it is not a substitute for the moment-to-moment
practice of being in the bod y; otherwise, its ef fect will only be
temporary. Here it is. When yo u are unoccupied for a few minutes, and especially last thing at
night be fore falling asleep and first thing in the morning before getting
up, “floo d” your body with consciousness. Close your eyes. L ie flat on
your back. Choose dif ferent parts of your body to fo cus your attention on
briefly at first: hands, feet, arms, legs, abdomen, chest, head, and so on. Feel the  life ener gy inside those  parts as intensely as you can. S tay with
each par t for fifteen seconds or so. Then let your attention run  through
the body like a wave a few time s, from feet to head and back again. This
need only take a minute or so. After that, feel the inner body in its
totality, as a single field of ener gy. Hold that feeling for a few minutes. Be intensely present during that time, present in every cell of your body. Don’ t be  concerned if the mind  occasionally succeeds in drawing your
attention out of the body and you lose yourself in some thought. As soon
as you notice that this has hap pened, just return your attention to the
inner body. LET THE BREA TH T AKE YOU INT O THE BODY
At t imes, when my mind has been very active, it has acqui r ed such
momentum that I find it impossible to take my attention away fr o m it and
feel the inner bo dy. This happens particularly when I get into a worry or
anxiety pattern. Do you have any suggestions. If at any time you are finding it hard to get in touch with the inner body,
it is usually easier to focus on your breathing first. Conscious breathing,
which is a powerful meditation i n its own right, will gradually put you in
touch w ith the body. Follow the breath with your attention as it moves in
and out of your body. Breathe into the body, and feel your abdomen
expanding and contracting slightly with each inhalation and exhalation. If y ou find it easy to visualize, close your eyes and see yourself
surrounded by light or immerse d in a luminous substance — a sea of
consciousness. Then breathe in that ligh t. Feel that luminous su bstance
filling u p your body and making it luminous also. Then gradually focus
more on  the feeling. Y ou are now  in your body. Don’ t get attached to any
visual image. CREA TIVE USE OF MIND
If yo u n eed to use your mind for  a specific purpose, use it in con junction
with your inner body. Only if you are able to be conscious  without
thought can you use your mind creatively, and the easiest way to enter
that state is through your body. Whenever an answer, a solution, or a
creative idea is n eeded, stop thinking for a moment by focusing attention
on your  inner ener gy field. Be come aware of the stillness. When you
resume thinking, it will be fresh and creative. In any thought activity,
make it a habit to go back and  forth every few minutes or so between
thinking and an inner kind of lis tening, an inner stillness. W e c ould say:
don’ t just think with your head, think with your whole body. THE AR T OF LISTENING
When listening to another person, don’ t just listen with your mind, listen
with your whole body. Feel the ener gy field of your inner body as youlisten. T hat takes attention away from thinking and creates a still space
that ena bles you to truly listen without the mind interfering. Y ou are
giving the other person space —  space to be. It is the most precious gift
you can  give. Most people don’ t know how to listen because t he major
part of their attention is taken up  by thinking. They pay more attention to
that than to what the other person is saying, and none at all to what really
matters: the Being of the other person underneath the words  and the
mind. O f course, you cannot fe el someone else’ s Being except through
your ow n. This is the beginning of the realization of oneness, which is
love. At the deepest level of Being, you are one with all that is. Most hu man relationships consist mainly of minds interacting with each
other, not of hu man beings communicating, being in commu nion. No
relationship can  thrive in that way, and that is why there is so much
conflict in relationships. When the mind is running your life, conflict,
strife, and problems are inevitab le. Being in touch with your inner body
creates a clear space of no-m ind within which the relationship can
flower. CHAPTER SEVEN
P O R T A L S  I N T O
 T H E  U N M A N I F E S T E D
GOING DEEPL Y INT O THE BODY
I can feel the en er gy inside my body, especially in my arms and  legs, but
I don’ t seem to be able to go mor e deeply, as you suggested earlier. Make it into a m editation. It needn’ t take long. T en to fifteen m inutes of
clock time should be suf ficient. Make sure first that there are no external
distractions such  as telephones o r people who are likely to interrupt you. Sit o n a chair, but don’ t lean ba ck. Keep the spine erect. Doin g so will
help you  to stay alert. Alternati vely, choose your own favorite position
for meditation. Make su re the body is relaxed.
The inner body is your link to the Unmanifested, and it is the key to transcending the ego and the world of form.
What is the relationship between presence and the inner body?
No, you cannot use your mind to understand the Unmanifested, as it is beyond the realm of thought and conceptualization.
Can you use your mind to understand the Unmanifested?
The inner body is timeless and ageless, and the outer body will also slow down its aging process and become stronger as a result.
What is the relationship between the inner body and the outer body?
No, the mind cannot create a portal to the Unmanifested, and instead, it is the source of separation and conflict.
Is it possible to use your mind to create a portal to the Unmanifested?
No, enlightenment is not achieved through a romantic relationship, as it is a fleeting experience and not a sustainable state. True love and enlightenment can only arise from a deep understanding of the inner body and the Unmanifested.
Can you achieve enlightenment through a romantic relationship?