Becoming The Man My Father Always Was
(for Brian D)
Each night
I would follow you
through the rituals
of what you had to do
being Daddy.
I wanted to be Daddy too.
Mimicking your gait
becoming an exact
copy
of you
trailing along
in your footsteps
like a lone seagull
following in the wake
of some great ship
of state
watching the water
burn
'til it was all bubbles
then letting it
calm down
before filling my mother's
hot water bottle
carrying it to her side
like a lover's gift.
I was
your little shadow.
She'd always smile:
'Thank you Danny! '
'That's alright love
was always the answer.
These the ritualistic words
in the hot water bottle ceremony.
Then he'd teach the clock
to bong
adjusting it with his hands
and wind up Time
so that it spit tick & tocks
all through the night
then go lock doors
turn keys
draw bolts.
'That's it, son! '
I used to imagine
being you
and now I am
my own man
winding up Time
bringing my missus
the gift of a hot water bottle
(the gift of me)
both equally
heart warming.
'Thank you Donall! '
she always smiles.
'That's all right love! '
I always answer.
Me the man
i am
because of you.