My soul
disguised as a shadow
drifted back
into my past
managed unseen
to cross the border
of Life
(& Death)
enter again
that room
where the memory
begins
(when the memory wasn’t even a memory)
but the real thing
my soul steals a crumb
of her laughter
nothing that could be
missed
the merest sliver.
I (then)
shiver
seeing my soul
stealing my sister’s
laughter
but not recognising it
seeing only
a shadow of a shadow.
Throwing off its shadowy
clothes
my soul
returns
smelling remotely of
a Past
the stale smell
of Death.
“Did you get it...did you get it! ”
I demand.
“Yes...yes...but don’t
ask me again! ”
“If God ever finds out...”
But I don’t hear
I am beyond
my soul’s
reproach
following the steps
of my tears
leading me to
the treasure
of her
laughter.
*******
Long for you to turn
& then...smile at me again.
But – the photo won’t
listen to me...'Listen to me! '
Deaf to everything but – Death.
********
Your grave buried now
beneath such snow & prayers.
Both angel & I
gazing at nothing...sky...
you so alive...in my head.
*******
So cold...my shadow
frozen to the ground...fract...ures
as I move away
I leave it behind and grow
another to take with me.
*******