'You look like a film star', I told her
She took the compliment well
But I did not go into detail
For some things, you never must tell
Eyes not unlike Bette Davis
Huge mouth like Jerrie Hall
A nose resembling Streisand's
And she really wasn't that tall
Her tits were like Paris Hilton's
Her neck was scraggy as hell
An arse like Jennifer Lopez
And what was that God-awful smell!