text: on the surface i seem to be a normal girl.........? i meet guys and i get asked out often.  i always say i will go and i want to, but then i always cancel!  i really want to date, but i have been doing this for the past two years!!!  there was a guy who was persistant...five weeks of asking.  so i finally went and we had so much fun!  i told him i would call him and i didn't.  he called me and i didn't return his call.  i emailed him and said i would call and i still didn't.  what is my freakin deal???  everything in me tells me to get off my arse and date.  but when it comes down to it i'm a big chicken!  does this even make sense???  ok, truth time.  a big part of it is i had a hysterectomy and went from a size 3 to a size 16 in six months.  no matter what i do i cannot lose it.  i still get asked out by pretty hot guys, i'm firm still, muscular and i am pretty.  but i feel disgusting and fat.  i don't feel like i can have sex with a guy because i feel so gross naked now.  and when it comes down to it dating = sex.  eventually. you are beautiful all these men are still asking you out.size doesn't matter anymore it's whats inside that counts,give these men a chance to prove themselves...there's no need to feel disgusting and fat because your not,the men that are asking you out certainly don't think that or they wouldn't be asking you out in the first place,sounds like your a little afraid and weary of being rejected but if you look at the bigger picture they are interested in you thats why they are asking you out...listen to your instincts they're telling you to wake up and smell the coffee...your beautiful accept it...go out and enjoy yourself...