text: help, i hate break-ups? okay, i just recently got out of a relationship that meant more to me than my own life even, and im not sure why it hurts so much, and i was getting over it until i saw her with another guy, then i just completly broke down into tears.....what do i do?  by the way, im 15 and a guy.... it hurts a lot because you have let it mean a lot to you. in a way, you gave power to her, and you kind of relinquished emotionally; you kind of put your life in her hands, and your self-worth upon her acceptance of you. there's probably not much you can do about it now that everything happened. i say that retrospecting back to a similar, extremely traumatizing experience i had. i was in so much pain, for months. it was because i had invested my pride in her. that's always a mistake. you need to kind of "carry your own pride" and not expect your woman to hold all of it. what i refer to "investing your pride" is a process by which you try to come to terms with being with her. the first feeling is that you like her a lot, and in essence she becomes some type of possession or trophy, and she determines your social standing. then a paradox happens: you think "since she's so great, and she's with me, that means i'm great... no wait... i'm even greater than her"!. that's when things start falling apart. too much of that, and then she leaves, and you're don't feel that great anymore. maybe i'm like way off. this is just my guess. the solution is to concentrate on your goals. read as many self-help books you can on goal setting and "reaching your dreams" and stuff. audio books are even better, it's like listening to a friend trying to help. good luck.