text: who'd win in a fight, jack bauer or chuck norris?   oh good lord! jack of course! chuck would get all into some contorted sort of martial arts pose and then jack would just up and shoot him in the leg and yell, "tell me where the bomb's at!!!" to which a bloody and weepy norris would reply, "what the h are you talking about?" but it wouldn't matter because jack would have already snuck out of the building by posing as an fbi agent.