text: matrimonial name changes...? i find this tradition really offensive.  women say they want to change their name to show commitment to their husbands.  but what about their husband's commitment?  shouldn't they change their name too?  please, i'd like to know why this tradition continues and how come more women aren't pissed off that this is expected from them? i didn't change my name when i married, because i do think it's outdated.  we have two children who have my husband's last name.  what i find offensive is when they try to give you the first name, too, as in "mrs. john smith." for heavens' sake.   i don't know why this tradition has continued, but it is difficult to find a solution that is concise and clear.  either you have to explain and defend having a different name, or you have to adopt both, which gets pretty cumbersome.