text: how do i get my boyfriend to treat me better? he gets drunk and gets mean and he doesnt spend any time with me there are two problems in your relationship.  the obvious one is that he has a drinking problem and relationship problems.  he needs treatment.  the second problem is that you are drawn to someone who treats you badly and you want to get him to love you.    you can't fix him.  you can't save him.  and even if you could, it wouldn't mean that he would love you more or love you better.  sometimes we're drawn to men like this because we don't feel very lovable, but that's not the case.    a real man will feel good about himself, and he will enjoy making you feel good spending time with him.  don't settle for anything less than that.  if you have a hard time feeling like you could be in a relationship you don't have to work really hard to deserve or earn, find a good mentor, or therapist to work with.  two broken hearted people don't make one good relationship.  instead of fixing him, mend your own broken-heartedness and find real, mutual, reciprocal love.