text: does one go to hell if..........? thay cannot forgive or reconcile with their parents?  at d old students re-union i was surprised at the number of women who had a grudge against their mothers and the number who men who blamed their parents for their misery.   there was a woman who felt that her parents had squashed all her dreams when they paid for her brother's medical education. they had no money left for her, so she had to work for a living just after high school. the brother has moved on and now she has to look after her parents single handedly. she is glad she has them, but always wishes that they had paid for her education. as as kid she always wanted to give them a big house and happiness.  then there were people whose parents had seperated when they were small. they never had a parent, and have not been able to forgive the parent that brought them up for creating the vaccum in their lives.   the question is: with so  much bitterness against their parents, will they ever be able to make it to heaven?? john milton, in paradise lost said, "the mind is its own place and in itself can make a hell of heaven, a heaven of hell."  thus, we create our own destiny anew in each and every moment.  bitterness is a thorn deep below the skin of our consciousness that continues to fester as long as we harbor it.  to be free, one must let go of the past and take responsibility for their feelings and their actions.  it is irresponsible to blame one's feelings on another.  where do the feelings emanate from?  within ourselves, we create them.  something outside may be the catalyst for such feelings, but we create them and react to our self-made feelings.        i have a question for your question - why wait until you are dead to find out?  why not try to be free from our self-created suffering and live in peace right this second?    as the maxim goes:  to err is human.  to forgive, divine.