text: does he love me more than her? my guy friend and i have been really good friends for the past five years.  we spend a lot of time together and have made pacts together initially stating that we will wed if we are both single at the age of 26.  at the beginning of our friendship we had briefly dated for about a month, but ended it and remained friends.  through those years however, many of his friends have told me that he still had strong feelings for me, which i didn't care to explore.  this previous summer however, i did.  he confessed that he had secretly been in love with me for the past five years.  i had also confessed to him that i had strong feelings for him as well.  so we began to have a secretive relationship.  the major problem, however, is that he has a girlfriend in which he has been dating for six months.  i questioned him about his feelings and he said that he "likes me and always has but doesn't know what to do". if he loves me than he wouldn't want to stay with her. so why is he staying with her? i think that you should back away from him. right now, you're letting him have all the benefits of being with you, while you have to share his affections with another girl.if he really loved you than he would give up the relationship with the other girl and soley be yours. you should give him an ultimatum...either she goes or you do. you definitely deserve better than second rate...which is where he has you now. also, you should be aware that if you do get with him he could have a secretive relationship with someone else while you two are dating just like he has done with you now.