text: i discovered porn in my 14 year old son's bedroom.  what have other parents done in a similar situation? i have suspected he has started masturbating.  should i ignore it, make a big deal of it, or just talk to him about it? if you want to embarrass him, make a big deal out of it. if not, just ignore it. he is 14, this is a normal thing for him. what is wrong with masturbating? would you rather he be experimenting with girls? for now let him have his privacy. but you might want to have that talk soon. don't make an issue of it, just say something like, "hey, son; when i was cleaning your room/gathering clothes (or whatever it was you were doing in his room...) i found some things that make me think we should talk about sex." i told my son that i understand that it is normal for his hormones to be raging out of control at 14 and if he had questions, i preferred he talked to me about it so he could get the straight dope on it. i did not want him learning it on the street where they are not as likely to tell him about aids and other stds. we had serious chats about it and i told him i would be a hypocrite if i told him "don't have sex at your age." he is now 20 and is still a virgin. i suspect that won't be for much longer - much to my dismay - but he has a girl that he is talking about marrying. my only baby will soon be out of my home and in his own! 8>(