text: how do i approach my wife about either adding another woman or going to see another woman by myself? i just need some helpful suggestions here, please no moralistic preaching. oh yes my friend you are so lucky i have bumped into your question. i have dedicated countless scientific hours to the study of this and i am happy to inform you that i have succeeded. there are several aproaches you can take but first you need to find out why you want to do this? a) is it just a sexual thing? b) is it that you want to incorporate a second wife into the family dinamycs? what exactly are you feeling? know that this is not a quick process, it will take you months if not years to work on her in order to agree to this and even then it may not happen ever. with that said lets get to it. if its the sexual thing then it will be a lot easier than you think, its not that hard to get a woman to agree to it, now the realtionship part that one will be a tought one but let me assure you that it can be done, i have done it and it works out great for all of us. i will tell you buddy that its not an easy life but the rewards are worth it to me. 1- you need to prepare the grownd. be very affectionate, be helpfull, you need to give in order to receive, you will have to become a pleaser. ie. breakfast in bed, do dishes, make sure she enjoys sex very much, compliments, flowers, etc. 2-avoid fights. dont get into it with her, make problems look like a thing of the past. if there is a disagreement or situation you talk about it in a civil manner, no name calling, no yelling. be very understanding of the situation and her feelings, make consecions and move on, dont bring up the past no matter what, if you fail to do this you will be taking a few steps back. 3-connect with her. make sure you reach a transendent connection with her, be more aware of her feelings and thoughts on many topics. make sure you make time and place to talk to her, to discuss different things other than her job or friends, focus on her and only her. 4-if you have children be more affectionate with the children and more involved with them, dont' dump them on her or expect her to take care of them, cook breakfast for them on a sat morning and take them to the park so she can sleep in and have some alone time.  this process could take anything between a month and a year tops but you will see some dramatic changes. at some point she will start doing more stuff for you, asking you how you are, cooking you up stuff you like, etc. this is her way of reciprocating. if she doesn't there will be a point in which you feel like you need to say something because you will feel neglected, ok when this happens resist, deal with it and continue doing your part. then the second time you feel like you are going to explode say something, but remember no yelling and no fighting ( that is the golden rule here),she will ask you what she could do and just say that you want her to show you as well that she cares and loves you, don't say anything about a 3some, dont even hint it. then give her a cpl days, she will spend this time thinking what she can do to make it up to you, at this point you have a conversation about things you would like her to do but still don't bring up the other woman thing, wait. she will try to do this things, more than likely she will screw it up so you will have another conversation about it, again remember to be very civil about this, dont fight no matter what. now you are ready to make a move; if its for a simple sexual expirerience ask her during or right after sex: how she would feel about having sex with another woman? and just listen, she will at some point ask you why? or what you think? either way your response will be that she is so sexy and she would look so much sexier having sex with another woman, the kissing, the touching, etc. reasure her that she is the only woman in your life and you love her so much. then all of the sudden kiss her and get down dirty to having sex again, but this time it has to be passionate, animal, porno kind of sex. she will make a coment about it and tell her that just picturing it in your 