text: help! i lost the letters i wrote to my dead boyfriend? it's making me sucidal!? three days before his death i wrote him a letter about how much i loved him and how lucky i was to have him. he never had the opportunity to read them cuz he had got murdered 3 days i later.this was in september of 2005. i pulled them out to read them and now i can't find them. i have a memory box under my bed of all the memories i have of him i remember placing them back under the bed. now i can't find them. i searched my dorm room all over, and i losing it! i feel like when god took him away he snatched my heart out of my chest, now it's like god not only took him away but he wants to steal away any happy memories i had of him. please offer any soothing advice to help me, i know u can't help me find them but plz what do u think i should do, cuz i'm about 1 step away from suicide? not only can i not have the love of my life, i cant have the memories either. hunny materialistc things arent what holds your memories! he never read them anyway, instead of holding on to that so dearly, write him new ones. my best friend was murdered and thats what i do. i "send" him letters. i write them on paper and then burn them... thats my way of sending them. god doesnt give you more than you can handel. eveything that happens in life makes you stronger. suicide is a permanent solution for temporary problems. i believe you go to hell if you take your own life, then you will never see him again... good luck and please be strong. my prayers are with you!