text: suspicious? what if you think your spouse is not telling the truth and might be having an affair and when you ask you just don't believe them.. what do you do? i am told that not telling the truth is the most common attitude.  it is a common reflex in order to protect the official relationship.  do you little research (pockets, mobile phone, emails etc), if that is important to you. you can also hire a private detective, but that is expensive. otherwise, just probe some good friends naively and see what they say/ know.  good luck, it is not pleasant to suspect your partner is having an affair. on the other side, knowing the full truth is not necessarily better. i have been there.  all the best.