text: why is it so hard for a black professional woman to find a mature, educated black man, or any race of male? who fits those qualities?  i live in mi near detroit, and the quality is down right horrible, i am nearing 30 and am thinking of moving just to have a chance of finding a husband...why do i have to go through that extreme you know i feel your pain.  i really do.  however, i am going to make a few suggestions.  one: attitude.  if you have the attitude that you aren't going to find someone, then you probably won't.  two: looking for things to be wrong.  instead of thinking, what is wrong with this guy, try looking for what is right.  and those are my positivisms for today.  now that i got that out of the way, i have to say that dating sucks. i can't really blame it all on the men but a lot of it has to do with their shortcomings.  can't really speak on all men in this area because i know a few women who are happily married.  but i have seen my share of heartbreak personally and through friends and family.  i hear a lot about men being intimidated.  i just don't understand that.  if you have an attractive woman who is fun to be with who just happens to be successful, why would that intimidate you.  that sounds like insecurity instead of intimidation.    i know you and you are not intimidating so i can't really see that as an answer.  however, i am not sure if moving is the right choice.  not for that reason anyway.  my sister friends all over the country, black and white, seem to be having the same problem.