text: what are your favorite smart-alec quotes? i'm looking for the kind you see on tshirts & bumper stickers.  keep it clean, please.  this is for my 12 year old neice.  we are decorating t- shirts together.    i could also use some for the parents. "i'm only wearing black until they make something darker" "my dog's favorite snack is my homework." "keep staring. i might do a trick." "i'm not selfish. i just like things my way." it's hard to soar with eagles, when your surrounded by turkey's" "consciousness- that annoying time between naps"  for the father - "bank of dad"