My boyfriend cheated on me and I found out 6 months later at work from a customer. I was so embarrassed. I did not eat for days.
I enjoyed talking to someone with a different opinion.
No
I think it didn't get where it needed to.
None
Hello I am very sad today. My partner is cheating on me.
user
null
Cheating on you?
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
Yes. With another woman.
user
null,null
How do you know that your partner is cheating on you? Did he tell you that he is?
assistant
Question,Question
I was told by a customer at work. I do not know this person well, yet they knew the person he was cheating on me with. He will not admit it himself.
user
null,null
I am sorry if your partner is cheating. So, your partner denies the charge of cheating? Are you and your partner married?
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance,Restatement or Paraphrasing,Question
Yes. He says the person who told me is lying. We are not married but we live together.
user
null,null
How long have you been in a relationship with your man?
assistant
Question
2 years
user
null
So, 2 years should be long enough to know if your partner has been cheating.
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
What do you mean exactly?
user
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Are you someone who trusts people? I think that most men would fess up about it.
assistant
Question
I guess all people are different. I generally trust people easily.
user
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Does he show affection to you? If he is adamant about loving you, then, it may be false allegations.
assistant
Question
That is true. He is but, has been distant lately.
user
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I have had coworkers lie and be jealous that I have a good relationship with my partner.
assistant
Self-disclosure
Do you think maybe it was a rumor started by someone who could be jealous?
user
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Ash your partner if he loves you enough to propose marriage. If he says no, then ask him why.
assistant
Question
That is a good point.
user
null
Yes, workers can be a real problem and can make up stories about people. Slander in the work place happens. Unfortunately, lies and rumors are just that.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance,Affirmation and Reassurance
I am not sure if I am okay with giving him an ultimatum. We are still young and although I love being in a relationship, I am unsure about marriage. But I appreciate your suggestions and you make a great point about the workplace being hostile
user
null,null,null
Sure, I understand.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
I should trust my partner more than any random person.
user
null
Yes, the workplace is not like home life. Yes, trust matters.
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing,Affirmation and Reassurance
But every time i bring it up, he tries to change the subject. How should I approach him to communicate better?
user
null
I would see if he wants to spend time doing things like volunteering after work. If he says yes, or is excited, that is a good sign that he wants to be with you....even after work.
assistant
Information
okay! that is a good idea. Maybe I can research something and see if there is anything new we can do together.
user
null
Find things that he has in common or energize the relationship. Yes, ask him if he wants to learn to swing dance or take skiing lessons or volunteer for Habitat for Humanity.
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Providing Suggestions
That is a good point. It is just hard to go on with the relationship when I feel I do not know the whole truth and there is little discussion or reassurance.
user
null
You have done your part, but if he wants to show you affection on a regular basis, that is a good sign. How old are the both of you?
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance,Question
Okay. I will keep that in mind. We are 22.
user
null,null
Are you intimate with your partner, on a regular basis?
assistant
Question
Yes but less over the past few months.
user
null
Spicing up the live life can also help to energize hings. I mean, the love life. Te lack in the last few months could be a physical issue or stress related....for him. Does he mention a lot of stress at the job or is he in college? 22 is young. You are both relatively young. I feel that there is plenty to learn about each other.
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Providing Suggestions,Question,Reflection of feelings
That's understandable. Maybe I can communicate with him first.
user
null
How do you all generally communicate? Through text?
assistant
Providing Suggestions
He is going to law school and I am going to med school. There is a ton of stress on both ends.
user
null
Which do you and your man like to communicate?
assistant
Question
No live together so we use call, text, and see each other in person. I communicate much more than he does. Thats why I think he is hiding something.
user
null,null
Well, you and your man are under a lot of stress, so keep that in mind. The study may be making him withdraw a lot.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
You are right. I will try to be more sensitive about that. Thank you for your help.
user
null
I would ask his fellow students, if you know any of them if they think he really loves you.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
Do you think getting other people involved is a good idea?
user
null
I would be subtle about that tactic. If you haven't met any of his school mates. I wouldn't pursue that option. Have you met any of his class mates?
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Providing Suggestions
Yeah he has a few close friends but he is pretty to himself. We both live far away from home.
user
null
Are you and him directly off campuses in housing? You both attend the same college, correct?
assistant
Question
Yes off campus. Same college.
user
null
Where do you work? Have you seen the customer who said that your partner was cheating? Seen the customer before? Was it a man or woman who dropped the shocking news? I feel that the customer may have a case of mistaken identity indeed.
assistant
Question,Question,Reflection of feelings
I work at a bar part time to support may way through school. It was a women. I know her, but not well. Met a few times around school.
user
null,null
Sounds like drunk slander talk. I would let things go for awhile and follow up later.
assistant
Reflection of feelings