user12857: What do you think of this article about romantic love? I am skeptical about his understanding of upeksha.
As I understand it, romantic love does not really exist in Buddhism because the targeted love in Buddhism loves everything without discrimination (which directly contradicts romantic love where you love your beloved more than a chair, for example. You don't want to share him/her).

user16635: The key phrase is this answer — which Thich Nhat Hanh repeats a few times — is this:

Romantic or not romantic, that is not what is important. What is
  important is if it is true love or not true love.

Buddhism is a practice, and we can bring that practice into any human activity. It doesn't matter whether we are meditating, baking bread, weeding a vegetable patch, ruling a country, or building a family; if we bring the practice into the activity we will begin to resolve discontentment and misery. If we don't, we won't, because we'll be caught up in the tides of human discontent.
Keep in mind that the eight monastic precepts were intended to create a clear space, one free of most of the interpersonal interactions that make up much of the karmic world. Monasteries are designed to place each person alone with the universe, without distractions, making higher states easier to attain. Since romance and sexuality are intensely karmic — riddled with unconscious drives, personal ideals, social demands, joys and fears and practical consequences — they are usually excluded by monastic orders. A monastery that placed no restrictions on interpersonal relationships we quickly de-evolve into a village. A high-minded village, perhaps, but one that had lost that specific quality of being a clear space for transformation. But that doesn't apply to those who live in a village, where the karma of social life is unavoidable. 
With respect to upeksha specifically, don't be confused by the way TNH is using the word love. When he says that love becomes 'all embracing' he doesn't mean that one comes to love the entire world romantically (which would be terribly confusing). He's referring to the contagious aspect of human attitudes. We all know that when an angry person walks into a room s'he stirs up emotions in others. People will 'catch' the anger and have visceral responses to it. We also know that people can 'catch' elements of peace and equanimity from someone who has walked far down the Buddhist path. Being in the presence of a master, by and of itself, can align us without effort. That is an aspect of human karma; we resonate with those around us. So when we bring the dharma into a personal relationship and reach a deep equanimity, that love radiates, and others resonate to it. Your love for another becomes all embracing in the same way that sunlight is all embracing: not because the sun reaches out to each person individually, but because light and warmth is pouring out of it unhindered. 

user8157: Buddhism has two levels of teaching: 
(i) worldly/moral; and 
(ii) non-worldly. 
Non-worldly love is universal love of metta (refer to Sn 1.8); which does not include sexuality. 
Worldly moral love is fidelity or loyalty to one person (refer to AN 4.55). Romantic love can exist within moral love however it is the non-romantic mutual life goals & qualities that are the most important criteria in Buddhism for a lasting relationship (refer to AN 4.55). If people engage in sexual relationship, in Buddhism, this is done without sharing your partner with others.

12857: <p>What do you think of <a href="https://thichnhathanhfoundation.org/blog/2018/2/7/does-buddhism-support-romantic-love" rel="nofollow noreferrer">this article</a> about romantic love? I am skeptical about his understanding of <em>upeksha</em>.</p>
<p>As I understand it, romantic love does not really exist in Buddhism because the targeted love in Buddhism loves everything without discrimination (which directly contradicts romantic love where you love your beloved more than a chair, for example. You don't want to share him/her).</p>
 16635: <p>The key phrase is this answer — which Thich Nhat Hanh repeats a few times — is this:</p>

<blockquote>
  <p>Romantic or not romantic, that is not what is important. What is
  important is if it is true love or not true love.</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Buddhism is a practice, and we can bring that practice into any human activity. It doesn't matter whether we are meditating, baking bread, weeding a vegetable patch, ruling a country, or building a family; if we bring the practice into the activity we will begin to resolve discontentment and misery. If we don't, we won't, because we'll be caught up in the tides of human discontent.</p>

<p>Keep in mind that the eight monastic precepts were intended to create a clear space, one free of most of the interpersonal interactions that make up much of the karmic world. Monasteries are designed to place each person alone with the universe, without distractions, making higher states easier to attain. Since romance and sexuality are <em>intensely</em> karmic — riddled with unconscious drives, personal ideals, social demands, joys and fears and practical consequences — they are usually excluded by monastic orders. A monastery that placed no restrictions on interpersonal relationships we quickly de-evolve into a village. A high-minded village, perhaps, but one that had lost that specific quality of being a clear space for transformation. But that doesn't apply to those who live in a village, where the karma of social life is unavoidable. </p>

<p>With respect to <em>upeksha</em> specifically, don't be confused by the way TNH is using the word love. When he says that love becomes 'all embracing' he doesn't mean that one comes to love the entire world <em>romantically</em> (which would be terribly confusing). He's referring to the contagious aspect of human attitudes. We all know that when an angry person walks into a room s'he stirs up emotions in others. People will 'catch' the anger and have visceral responses to it. We also know that people can 'catch' elements of peace and equanimity from someone who has walked far down the Buddhist path. Being in the presence of a master, by and of itself, can align us without effort. That is an aspect of human karma; we resonate with those around us. So when we bring the dharma into a personal relationship and reach a deep equanimity, that love radiates, and others resonate to it. Your love for another becomes all embracing in the same way that sunlight is all embracing: not because the sun reaches out to each person individually, but because light and warmth is pouring out of it unhindered. </p>
 8157: <p>Buddhism has two levels of teaching: </p>

<p>(i) worldly/moral; and </p>

<p>(ii) non-worldly. </p>

<p>Non-worldly love is universal love of metta (refer to <a href="https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/snp/snp.1.08.amar.html" rel="nofollow noreferrer">Sn 1.8</a>); which does not include sexuality. </p>

<p>Worldly moral love is fidelity or loyalty to one person (refer to <a href="https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an04/an04.055.than.html" rel="nofollow noreferrer">AN 4.55</a>). Romantic love can exist within moral love however it is the non-romantic mutual life goals &amp; qualities that are the most important criteria in Buddhism for a lasting relationship (refer to <a href="https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an04/an04.055.than.html" rel="nofollow noreferrer">AN 4.55</a>). If people engage in sexual relationship, in Buddhism, this is done without sharing your partner with others.</p>
