risk wish could beive long history mental health problems along lines depression ptsd gad part ive lot improvement now say improvement something know exists feel it im done emptied reserves nothing left hate february coming  years ago later month came home found bodies husband  year old son whole month relive happened  starvation financial stress fights boss demanded take break lunch food attempt feb  course essay due day commitments day im probably going supportive role someone too many times wish worked told would happy attempt failed think ever been catastrophic failure reason im risk right now nearly crippled life im scared try again cant stand idea something partially working aware whats going around unable act theres nothing sure work except   probably would work fuck know it want know boys are want know friends left time doing want shit never have feels like everything systematically stripped me every time act towards interest feel like fall shit makes everything worse everything complicated want peace simplicity position support lot people around feel like imposter im depleted resources need someone take care me anyone tried it would false real would assuage guilt  nothing me one cares me ive faced neglect parents abandonment friends best friend murdered child tore away killed himself relationships think theyre mostly people unconsciously acting messed patterns me like im tool theyre using reenact shit theyre trying process matter im thing consequence feelings inherent value   days attempted killed son himself imagine burned brain cannot begin explain guilt deal with even tell people every single detail always tell fault happened fucking lying face stronger could stopped it police parents facing work dust settled months later alone totally utterly alone year know must come long way wait im waiting open door again couple weeks ill open door ill find dead again ill hear sirens flying me theres point chest moving no pretty extra fucking sure theyre dead sirens necessary fucking futile yes im pretty sure dead wish like hell them suffer here stage alone wanna stage alone fuck want me
risk wish could beive long history mental health problems along lines depression ptsd gad part ive lot improvement now say improvement something know exists feel it im done emptied reserves nothing left hate february coming years ago later month came home found bodies husband year old son whole month relive happened starvation financial stress fights boss demanded take break lunch food attempt feb course essay due day commitments day im probably going supportive role someone too many times wish worked told would happy attempt failed think ever been catastrophic failure reason im risk right now nearly crippled life im scared try again cant stand idea something partially working aware whats going around unable act theres nothing sure work except probably would work fuck know it want know boys are want know friends left time doing want shit never have feels like everything systematically stripped me every time act towards interest feel like fall shit makes everything worse everything complicated want peace simplicity position support lot people around feel like imposter im depleted resources need someone take care me anyone tried it would false real would assuage guilt nothing me one cares me ive faced neglect parents abandonment friends best friend murdered child tore away killed himself relationships think theyre mostly people unconsciously acting messed patterns me like im tool theyre using reenact shit theyre trying process matter im thing consequence feelings inherent value days attempted killed son himself imagine burned brain cannot begin explain guilt deal with even tell people every single detail always tell fault happened fucking lying face stronger could stopped it police parents facing work dust settled months later alone totally utterly alone year know must come long way wait im waiting open door again couple weeks ill open door ill find dead again ill hear sirens flying me theres point chest moving no pretty extra fucking sure theyre dead sirens necessary fucking futileyes im pretty sure dead wish like hell them suffer here stage alone wanna stage alone fuck wantme
riesgo deseo podría vivir larga historia problemas de salud mental en línea depresión ptsd gad parte ive lot mejora ahora decir mejora algo sabe existe sensación im hecho reservas vaciadas nada izquierda odio febrero viene hace años más tarde mes llegó a casa encontró cuerpos marido año hijo hijo todo mes revivir sucedió hambre estrés financiero peleas jefe exigió tomar descanso almuerzo intento de comida feb curso ensayo debido día compromisos día im probablemente ir papel de apoyo alguien muchas veces deseo trabajado contada feliz intento fallido pensar nunca fue fracaso razón riesgo ahora casi lisiado vida im miedo volver a intentarlo no puedo estar de pie idea algo parcialmente trabajo consciente lo que está por ahí incapaz actuar nada seguro trabajo excepto probablemente trabajo mierda saber que quieren saber chicos quieren saber amigos tiempo hacer miseria mierda nunca han sentido como todo sistemáticamente me despojó cada vez actuar hacia el interés sentir como caída mierda hace que todo peor todo complicado querer paz simplicidad posición apoyo mucho gente alrededor se siente im impostor im recursos agotados necesidad alguien me toma cuidado alguien alguien trató de que sería falso real assuage culpa nada