boyfriend murdered son killing year ago dont know go onlast year left home evening pick groceries returned home found boyfriend also father son murdered son killed himself could never express words felt then feel now spent time mental hospital great therapist great psychiatrist take medicines im supposed to adjusted needed resources event feel suicidal even grief group attended lockdown next month  year anniversary dont think it hoped feel even ounce better now hoped find something give purpose feel angry boyfriend didnt kill put misery caused taking baby date approaches feel much pain ive never religious wake ask god take me put misery feel unfair people likely dont want die dying corona virus im alive begging death try still post online like enjoyed happened try watching shows movies try see friends laugh sometimes ive good days nothing ever feel same enjoyed food much nothing tastes same idea feels triggered everything going grocery store like night everything happened seeing everything used buy son boyfriend imagine triggered apples oranges every fucking prius road boyfriend drove one killed inside garage kids mothers literally everywhere hearing child cry going catatonic state wondering   year old son crying killed commercials tv bathtubs son intentionally drowned one honest dont know havent killed yet wanted bad night officer explained performed life saving measures son success begged tell take son hospital said couldnt wanted run jump anything death officer blocked path killed myself literally one life would surprised friends mentally prepared possibility back everything happened dont know cant it dont know hard do
boyfriend murdered son killing year ago dont know go onlast year left home evening pick groceries returned home found boyfriend also father son murdered son killed himself could never express words felt then feel now spent time mental hospital great therapist great psychiatrist take medicines im supposed to adjusted needed resources event feel suicidal even grief group attended lockdown next month year anniversary dont think it hoped feel even ounce better now hoped find something give purpose feel angry boyfriend didnt kill put misery caused taking baby date approaches feel much pain ive never religious wake ask god take me put misery feel unfair people likely dont want die dying corona virusim alive begging death try still post online like enjoyed happened try watching shows movies try see friends laugh sometimes ive good days nothing ever feel same enjoyed food much nothing tastes same idea feels triggered everything going grocery store like night everything happened seeing everything used buy son boyfriend imagine triggered apples oranges every fucking prius road boyfriend drove one killed inside garage kids mothers literally everywhere hearing child cry going catatonic state wondering year old son crying killed commercials tv bathtubs son intentionally drowned one honest dont know havent killed yet wanted bad night officer explained performed life saving measures son success begged tell take son hospital said couldnt wanted run jump anything death officer blocked path killed myself literally one life would surprised friends mentally prepared possibility back everything happened dont know cant it dont know hard do
novio asesinado hijo asesinato hace un año no sé ir en el último año izquierda casa recoger comestibles regresó a casa novio también padre hijo asesinado hijo se suicidó nunca podría expresar palabras se sintió entonces se siente pasado tiempo hospital mental gran terapeuta gran psiquiatra tomar medicamentos im supuesto ajustar recursos necesarios evento se siente suicida incluso grupo de dolor asistió bloqueo el próximo mes aniversario no creo que se espera sentir incluso onza mejor ahora espera encontrar algo dar propósito sentir novio enojado no mató poner miseria causado tomar bebé enfoques sentir mucho dolor ive nunca despertar religiosa pedir dios me pone miseria sentir gente injusta probablemente no quieren morir morir corona virusim vivo pidiendo muerte tratar de morir todavía post línea como disfrutado sucedió tratar de ver espectáculos