know else go last resorti think handle life anymore think ever meant live long anyway always thought id kill  now am  burden family unable function adult completely miserable tired burnt existing would better everyone dead want die want try tread water anymore still feels like drowning brain constantly fogged muddled feel like im experiencing life even thoughts get shift work get car realize remember nearly anything went day suppose life monotonous forgettable like theres wall glass rest world see it mine cant touch experience it thing side glass clear coherent thoughts loneliness numbness depression college shitty community college that work feel pointless consuming im supposed want teacher ive day plans come future ones end grave energy actually pull plans redflag im much tired die mention ive developed couple eating disorders past two years first anorexia binge eating ive lost  pounds gained back half it feel disgusting unlovable control am stuck know else do im burden everyone nothing make family miserable ill never enough anyone want die im exhausted wish could die sleep know im hoping posting this know else do guess last resort vent everything event decide end it know know nearly  im wishing dead nothing left words maybe tomorrow kill me get hopes up
know else go last resorti think handle life anymore think ever meant live long anyway always thought id kill now am burden family unable function adult completely miserable tired burnt existing would better everyone dead want die want try tread water anymore still feels like drowning brain constantly fogged muddled feel like im experiencing life even thoughts get shift work get car realize remember nearly anything went day suppose life monotonous forgettable like theres wall glass rest world see it mine cant touch experience it thing side glass clear coherent thoughts loneliness numbness depression college shitty community college that work feel pointless consuming im supposed want teacher ive day plans come future ones end grave energy actually pull plans redflag im much tired die mention ive developed couple eating disorders past two years first anorexia binge eating ive lost pounds gained back half it feel disgusting unlovable control am stuck know else do im burden everyone nothing make family miserable illnever enough anyone want die im exhausted wish could die sleep know im hoping posting this know else do guess last resort vent everything event decide end it know know nearly im wishing dead nothing left words maybe tomorrow kill me get hopes up
know other go last resorti think handle life more think never signed live long de todos modos siempre pensé que id kill ahora soy carga family inhabilited function adulto completamente miserable cansado existente mejor todos los muertos quieren morir quieren probar agua de pisada más todavía se siente como ahogarse cerebro constantemente empañado embrollado sentir como im experimentar vida incluso pensamientos conseguir trabajo de turno conseguir realidad coche recordar casi cualquier cosa pasado día suponer vida monótono olvidable como Theres pared cristal resto mundo ver lo mío no puede tocar experiencia cosa lado vidrio claro pensamientos coherentes soledad entumecimiento depresión universidad mierda comunidad universidad que el trabajo se siente sin sentido consumir im supuesto querer maestro planes de día ven futuro final grave energía realmente tirar planes rojoflag im mucho cansado morir mencionar iv desarrollado pareja trastornos alimenticios pasados dos años primero anorexia binge ing ive pérdida libras ganados detrás la mitad se siente repugnante control indomable estoy atascado saber más hacer im carga todo el mundo nada hacer familia miserable malnever bastante nadie quiere morir im exhausto deseo podría morir dormir saber