feel bad sorryi even know start this emotions stirred up even know feel anymore except continuing depressed it  so currently little envious friends starting failure back june ive completed ib diploma programme sponsored able continue study abroad met sponsors requirements yet results bad im unable pursue studies overseas thats fine me thing kinda bugs felt left friends able get great results met sponsors requirements felt like pushed away mostly chat boat me recently sort of now already continue studies local universities one friend even without telling all make feel alienated like unwanted like proof convince useless kinda friend am guess useless like trait every day im feeling way always recalled back moment  yo get excellent result back primary school final exam causing dad hate me even so family went holiday end year twelve happened unfortunately smashed ceiling light accidentally stick place stayed i kinda swing stick imagining like one guys front marching band light piece really expensive guess dad went mad point shouted something cared back then grow realized left permanent scar inside me shouted born asked mom abort even born know something disappointing like would happen etc bla bla almost  years passed since then still remember words dad really conflict sometimes talk not really since mostly listening much mostly busy things mother working feed family yeah cliche is type family looks happy actually kinda broken maybe meh think it want hang noose make things worst im closeted gay religion gay crime live sometimes wondered living pakistan would better since least become hijra no know prefer men must hide sake name really big deal since stay closeted thats really pushing towards depression sense needing keep upon think actually making feel suicidal since small always tendency hide problems others even forced tell problems always ended telling lies cover ups would think ok fine even time people told tell problems no kept myself always comes mind disturb people problem enough handle own then again showing foolish hypocrite selfish egoistical am cant handle pain much more hearing people telling go see someone easy never really knew hard that hard trapped mind bear problems alone hiding even close me feeling alienated im quiet cry alone time thinking stupid silly things wanting suffering end cant im weak worthless useless am sorry long rant sorry taking time sorry everything but thank anyways
feel bad sorryi even know start this emotions stirred up even know feel anymore except continuing depressed it so currently little envious friends starting failure back june ive completed ib diploma programme sponsored able continue study abroad met sponsors requirements yet results bad im unable pursue studies overseas thats fine me thing kinda bugs felt left friends able get great results met sponsors requirements felt like pushed away mostly chat boat me recently sort of now already continue studies local universities one friend even without telling all make feel alienated like unwanted like proof convince useless kinda friend am guess useless like trait every day im feeling way always recalled back moment yo get excellent result back primary school final exam causing dad hate me even so family went holiday end year twelve happened unfortunately smashed ceiling light accidentally stick place stayed i kinda swing stick imagining like one guys front marching band light piece really expensive guess dad went mad point shouted something cared back then grow realized left permanent scar inside me shouted born asked mom abort even born know something disappointing like would happen etc bla bla almost years passed since then still remember words dad really conflict sometimes talk notreally since mostly listening much mostly busy things mother working feed family yeah cliche is type family looks happy actually kinda broken maybe meh think it want hang noose make things worst im closeted gay religion gay crime live sometimes wondered living pakistan would better since least become hijrano know prefer men must hide sake name really big deal since stay closeted thats really pushing towards depression sense needing keep upon think actually making feel suicidal since small always tendency hide problems others even forced tell problems always ended telling lies cover ups would think ok fine even time people told tell problems no kept myself always comes mind disturb people problem enough handle own then again showing foolish hypocrite selfish egoistical am cant handle pain much more hearing people telling go see someone easy never really knew hard that hard trapped mind bear problems alone hiding even close me feeling alienated im quiet cry alone time thinking stupid silly things wanting suffering end cant im weak worthless useless am sorry long rant sorry taking time sorry everything but thank anyways
Siéntete mal lo siento incluso saber comenzar esta emociones agitadas incluso saber sentir más excepto continuar deprimido por lo que actualmente poco envidioso amigos empezando fracaso volver junio ive completado ib diploma programa patrocinado capaz de seguir estudiando en el extranjero cumple con los requisitos de patrocinadores pero resultados malos