Olympics sketch: Team GB wins gold for gibberish Word of the day was "leverage." Tax-payers who have contributed to the £9.3bn cost will be pleased to learn that the UK plans to "leverage value" from the Games: indeed, "there's been a really big determination to leverage the Games to the greatest extent." Promoters have "leveraged the campaign across all our platforms." You wonder how these people talk when they get home at night. Good day at work, dear? Not bad. Committed a couple of outcomes. Invested an inward legacy summit. What's for dinner? Sorry, this is my book club night. You'll have to leverage it yourself. Undisputed champion of jargon was Sandie Dawe, chief executive of the tourism agency VisitBritain. Her goal, she explained, is "to put [Britain] on the wish-lists of growth markets around the world" (i.e., get the Chinese to visit). The good news: "Research shows that Britain is really strong on heritage and culture." The bad news: "It's a bit educational. Is it possibly a bit dull? Where's the fun? Where's the kind of excitement? So that's what we want to dial up on... One way she's dialled up on the fun is by creating "a raft of celebrity films... We've got some sports people: Lennox Lewis, Boris Becker, Colin Montgomerie, Jamie Oliver..." A reporter asked if the rain might put the growth markets off. "It's only the Brits that have an obsession with our weather," tutted Ms Dawe. Frankly, people don't come here to lie on a beach - that's not our offer. Curiously, of the many photos Ms Dawe used in her presentation, all showed Britain bathing in fabulous sunshine. Mr Robertson was evasive on the G4S shambles. "What happens to Nick Buckles is a matter for the post-Games environment," he said, making it sound like an apocalyptic waste land. He looked rather happier sharing an exciting fact he'd learnt about the construction of the Olympic Park. "The soil clean-up operation was so effective," he beamed, "that sufficient soil was removed from the site, cleansed and then put back on the site to fill the Albert Hall 220 times over!" Now there's an idea to help British tourism dial up on the fun. Come and watch the famous filling-of-the-Albert-Hall-with-cleansed-soil! For 220 nights only!