This Is Your Dad on Pot As a stay-at-home father of two children, I read Mark Wolfe's Sept. 8 Op-Ed article, "Pot for Parents," with horror. One of my goals as a parent is to model for my children what it means to be an adult. Sometimes that means being silly. Sometimes that means feeling stressed. Always it means showing them that life is complicated but that there are healthy, nonaddictive ways to manage it. Children are far more perceptive than we know. Perhaps those cautionary "voices" Mr. Wolfe writes about are his conscience telling him that his children know something is off about his behavior. Perhaps they are picking up on their dad's approval of drug use to handle problems. That is irresponsible at best, negligent at worst. Rather than medicating away his anxiety, Mr. Wolfe might consider dropping the drug use, exercising more often, going to therapy and finding other healthy ways to help himself. It's what mature adults do. Parents need to model for their children healthy ways of dealing with daily stress and anxiety rather than turning to bourbon or pot, as suggested by Mark Wolfe. Broadcasting his systematic reliance on marijuana to help him relax and engage with his children is shortsighted and sends the wrong message to teenagers, who are increasingly using marijuana at younger ages with proven, lasting damage to their brains. Surveys show that one in 15 high school seniors uses marijuana daily, and one in 14 eighth graders reports using it in the last 30 days. A recent Duke University study shows an eight-point drop in I.Q. for marijuana users who used the drug heavily from high school through age 38 from when they were originally tested, as 13-year-olds. Changes in the adolescent brain are structural (abnormalities in the cerebellum, amygdala, left hippocampus and white matter integrity) and functional (poorer processing time, decreased executive functioning and attention span). Parents have the most influence on their children's choices to use or not. Mr. Wolfe claims to have found that the "benefits clearly outweigh the risks." I wonder how he will feel when his children choose to follow his example. The writer is chief executive of Being Adept, a nonprofit substance abuse prevention and education program for middle-school students and their parents. If I found out as a teenager that my parents had been stoned throughout my youth, I would be disappointed. I am leaving for college in a year, and what I've seen at home - my dad working 16 hours a day and still coming home with a smile - has taught me that working hard is the only way to succeed. Doing drugs, whether it's your nightly bourbon or your "medicinal" weed, to deal with your stresses just teaches laziness and denial rather than dedication. I understand that "thinking a happier you" is better for your children, but your "happier you" is teaching them that drugs are a realistic solution to life, which frankly you don't even believe; otherwise, you would eat the brownies in front of them. Life is stressful. Do some jumping jacks with your kids; they'll love it. As a medical marijuana patient since 1999 whose two daughters were adolescents at the time, I tend to agree with Mark Wolfe about the salutary effects of pot, especially for jobless parents. Idle hands are the devil's workshop; suicide rates have been surging among 45-to-60-year-olds for several years now, and pot makes folks happier (though doctors say it aggravates depression). But when a stoned parent forgets that there is food cooking on the stove or in the oven and nods off as the child takes his nap, it can have tragic consequences. THC, the psychoactive part of the cannabis plant, may remain in the fatty tissue for 72 hours or more, depending on your diet and activity levels. I find Mark Wolfe's apologia for stoned parenthood deeply dishonest and disturbing. For whatever reason, his normal persona renders him ill equipped to deal with the hurly-burly of family life. The artificial high he describes allows him to float above many of the annoying aspects of child-rearing in a haze of carefree detachment. One can't help but wonder how this state of bliss will stand the test of time, when his teenagers require a more authentic father who is fully present to their needs. A little pot may help Mark Wolfe roll around the floor with his giggling daughters, "clicking into an easy dynamic of goofy happiness and love." But what about later when he has to help them with their math homework? Not that I think there is something necessarily wrong with Mark Wolfe's indulgence, but I get the same effect from eating a brownie - unlaced. I have one question for Mark Wolfe: Were you high when you wrote this article?