How to banish 'imposter syndrome' once and for all The imposter syndrome is not new. Pauline Clance and Suzannes Imes identified The Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women way back in 1978. Characteristics of the syndrome are a feeling that other people have an inflated idea of your abilities, a fear that your true abilities will be found out and a tendency to attribute successes to external factors, such as luck. And it does seem to be that far more women than men suffer from it - or maybe they're just the ones who admit to it. A recent YouGov survey reported that women are less likely than men to ask for promotions or pay rises and are more likely to cite factors such as lack of confidence or gender as barriers. Most women won't ask for a pay rise - unlike the Dagenham girls Ask your female friends, your book group, your sister. Almost without exception, the flicker of recognition is instantaneous when you mention the imposter syndrome. They all know what it means before you start to explain - they know what it feels like to pretend to be on the outside what you don't feel you are on the inside. When they speak at meetings, in public or to the media, there it is - the word "IMPOSTER!" written in huge letters right across their subconscious. But there's some comfort in the fact that other people can't see it. "The most terrible obstacles are such as nobody can see except oneself," in the words of George Eliot in Middlemarch. Women identify with the phenomenon more readily than men possibly because they are more self-analytical or possibly because they tend to lack confidence in their abilities. In a male-dominated workplace, it's sometimes easier to avoid putting their head above the parapet. Organisational psychologist Mary Sherry recognises the difference between men and women at work. Men see things as a game while women aren't even aware of the game that's being played. If an opportunity for promotion comes up, men do not seek affirmation, they'll just wing it. Women won't put themselves forward unless they can prove they can do the job. It all goes back to childhood, according to Sherry, starting at around five years old when boys play rough and tumble games and take risks while girls tend to form small groups of two and three and talk about their play. In the adult world, she says, if a man's giving a presentation, it can be "good enough." For a woman, it has to be "marvellous" and even when it's marvellous, it's not good enough. Sheryl Sandberg in her book Lean In says: "Fear is at the root of so many barriers that women face. Fear of not being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. She's the chief operating officer of Facebook, a successful woman, but she knows what it feels like. What's really going on here? What's holding women back? So part of what's holding women back is lack of self-belief and self-promotion. A survey by recruitment firm Astbury Marsden found that only one in eight top roles in the City is held by women, and that those women who do reach senior positions are in jobs that are generally lower paid. A 2012 report on The Next Generation of Working Women by management consulting firm Accenture found that women are less likely to speak up than men, less likely to manage their own careers and less likely to ask for a raise. Of course there are many women who are brimming with - apparent - self-belief. High achievers like TV Dragon Deborah Meaden, Carolyn McCall of easyJet or businesswoman Karren Brady know the importance of self-belief. "Confidence, coupled with self-esteem, is a great way to make your mark in an organisation," Brady has said. What is it about us? Do we take criticism too personally? Are we afraid of making mistakes, too risk-averse? Do we spend too much time on the detail and not on the big picture, keep a low profile at meetings, fail to put ourselves forward in case we're labelled bossy? Ambition can be a dirty word for women. Research shows that many women, instead of being proud of their achievements, tend to downplay them. Better to be self-deprecating and charming than that domineering woman people love to hate. Jude Kelly, artistic director of the South Bank Centre, recognises the problem for women in senior positions. She says: "You are under a microscope that's much fiercer, much closer on you than most men. And the language people use about women is much more derogatory. Our response to that cultural disadvantage should surely be to change and improve the culture. Women don't need be like men or fit in with the male way of doing things. Ambition can be a dirty word There are, of course, plenty of women who are true to themselves and who never try to be anything else - a shining example is Tessa Ross, controller of Film 4 - but there are still too many who feel they need to talk like a man, act like a man, even dress like a man, especially in male-dominated industries. But why should a woman lower her voice (as Margaret Thatcher famously did) or adjust to the traditional male way of doing business? Maybe there's a different way of looking at things. Jon Dymond, director of the Hay Group management consultants firm, told a newspaper recently that managers "need to stop expecting women to behave more like men, and instead explore what they themselves can do differently." There is now plenty of evidence that mixed boards mean better business. Many top businessmen recognise that the dialogue is better and there's more collaborative decision-making with women at the table. Their presence opens up new perspectives, different value systems, maybe an element of empathy which might not have been there before. It's no longer the 80s when men were alpha and women wore trouser suits. There are now lots of men out there in the world of business who positively welcome and enjoy a working atmosphere that isn't all about point-scoring and profits. Witness the more than 60 chairmen supporters of the 30% Club who are committed to bringing more women onto boards because it's good for business. Men can feel it too And some men feel imposters too. Men are as scared as we are, says NBC news correspondent Betty Rollin, they just repress it. Even the bullish Alastair Campbell understands self-doubt - but he sees it as a strength not a weakness: "It is the means by which I prepare, consider other options and perspectives, strive for clarity about what can be attained and what cannot - and then, critically, stop the doubting, and act." And of course it can be a sign of emotional intelligence as well as wisdom. In the words of Bertrand Russell: "The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser men so full of doubts." Self-awareness is key to overcoming that phony feeling. So is sharing experiences with others. Finding soulmates and allies, discovering that you're not alone can be very reassuring. Learning to take criticism seriously, not personally, is another. And it should be remembered that everyone's entitled to make mistakes from time to time - we need to learn from them and move on. If women can learn real confidence, raise their profile, banish fear and apply for those jobs just beyond their reach, think what a difference it will make to the working world. Confidence breeds confidence. Let's celebrate who we are, who we want to be and let's be authentic, not imposters. And above all, let's bring ourselves to work. Rosalind Adler and Lea Sellers run Media Skills for Women, which offers training to boost women's confidence when they speak in public or face the media