Microsoft: The extraordinary instructions in 44-page guide to British life by computer giant for its U.S. employees Issued to staff moving to computer giant's new research HQ in Cambridge Guide also gives definitions of fish and chips and a Chinese takeaway Has section on shopping in the city and how to navigate round Argos They are hardly worlds apart on the cultural front. But that hasn't stopped Microsoft drawing up a new 44-page guide to Britain for its U.S. staff to ensure they can adapt to life in this country. The handbook covers everything from helpful reminders to leave firearms at home and what time to eat breakfast to definitions of fish and chips and how to navigate your way round Argos. Called A Guide to Working and Living in Cambridge, it has been issued to staff who are relocating to the computer giant's new European research HQ in the city. Spelling it out: Microsoft has issued a 44-page handbook A Guide to Working and Living in Cambridge to explain the ways of British life to U.S. staff relocating to its UK offices in the city Covering all bases: This section entitled Shipping and Importing details which are not allowed into the country Breaking it down: The guide has been drawn up for staff who are moving to the computer giant's new European research HQ in Cambridge (pictured) Americans are warned not to bring firearms, stun guns, obscene material, drugs or dead animals through British customs. According to the guide, fish and chips is 'a national treat of fish, e.g. cod, fried in a crispy batter.' When it comes to pubs readers are told they are 'much more than plain bar' and to expect 'homely places full of historical character (and characters!) ' One laughably obvious description says British Chinese takeaways are known as 'Chinese' and cover 'South East Asian cuisine'. The guide says: 'Be warned that although this exotic cuisine is largely cherished by the British, the takeaways produce food adapted to the British taste and so will not necessarily be as authentic as dishes eaten in those particular countries - slight more cooking oil and MSG food additive than perhaps should be used!' It also points out that our favourite curries are 'more Bangladeshi than actually Indian.' Legal minefield: The American staff are helpfully reminded not to bring firearms, stun guns, obscene material, drugs or dead animals through British customs (file picture) Cultural differences: Staff are warned the standard eating time for breakfast is 7.30am to 9am (file picture) There is also practical information on accommodation, parking, using the Post Office and an explanation that appointments are unnecessary for A&E departments. And there is even a section on shopping in Cambridge and a series of paragraphs explaining how to navigate your way round Argos. The guide explains Argos is: 'A popular and useful warehouse shop in which you can browse a thick catalogue of very wide ranging products.' A glossary of English terms also explains how 'flat' means 'apartment' while British public schools are actually private. Surprisingly despite the unpopularity of President Barack Obama's healthcare bill, the document praises the NHS saying it is 'generally considered to be of an excellent standard' But it does point out that there are 'long waiting lists' which mean some people have private healthcare on top of NHS provision. Food for thought: The guide says that fish and chips is 'a national treat of fish, e.g. cod, fried in a crispy batter' Watering holes: When it comes to pubs readers are told they are 'much more than plain bar' and to expect 'homely places full of historical character (and characters!) ' Stating the obvious: one section says British Chinese takeaways are known as 'Chinese' and cover 'South East Asian cuisine' Once American readers have swotted up on the British way of life and the peculiarities of the English language they are introduced to the ways of historic Cambridge. The guide warns of high property and rent prices in Cambridge and quite rightly says that parking spaces are rare. Employees who will be based in Cambridge are introduced to punting and are told about the historic colleges of the prestigious University. Importantly, readers are giving tips on cycling in the bicycle capital including to use D-locks to ward of thieves. Addenbrooke's hospital in Cambridge: The guides explains that appointments are unnecessary in A&E Hardly New York: There is even a section on shopping in Cambridge and a series of paragraphs explaining how to navigate your way round Argos Employees are also warned that restaurants are not 24/7 as in many parts of America and told the standard eating time for breakfast is 7.30am to 9am. Cambridge Mayor Sheila Stuart, who is originally from the Pacific Northwest in the U.S., said: 'Moving here was a very strange experience for me. It took me a long time to make sense of it. You could not get coffee late at night. Cambridge University professor and director and curator of the Whipple Museum Liba Taub, who moved to the city 20 years ago, said there was an unavoidable language barrier between Britons and Americans. She said: 'One thing I love here is the English cheeses - a good Wensleydale. You don't get that back in America. 'It's fair to say Americans and the British are on people only separated by a common language. 'For example, 'quite' in America means really or very, but here it can be seen as denigration.' Microsoft has spent a reported £40 million fitting out the new offices, the same cost of building it.