Why do girls check out other girls? The alpha female may be the biggest threat yet she's also the one with whom women want to align. Being close to her gives status and they do so through flattery," says Sweet, in such a matter of fact tone I can't help but think I'm talking to a natural history expert about mating in the wild. The female of the (human) species - aka my mates and I - is perhaps more complex than I first thought. So take heed, especially when cheek-liner girl only likes your shoes but loves the entire outfit of the girl next to you in the queue - you've just been demoted. Tough break. Lemarc Thomas, managing director of elite international dating agency, Seventy Thirty, describes how "women who sign up are always curious about the other female customers at the agency, they want to suss out the competition so they can bring their "A" game." The idea that we are all silently battling it out with one another over our looks sounds a little absurd. Yet after more than thrice feeling telepathically slain on just one commute, I started to realise this thesis is not entirely untrue. I guess I do compare myself to others. I ask Jessica, a teacher, whether she thinks we engage in secret contests with one another and she ashamedly confesses: "Today I was walking behind a girl and the entire time I was deliberating whether her legs were fatter than mine." Thoughts like this are surely not part of our hard-wired genetics as females, but Jessica is not alone in these feelings, and if anything, this attitude is becoming increasingly common among women. Robin Thicke's video shows guys checking out 'hot girls' - but many of the women watching will also be checking out the 'hot girls' Sexed-up society It's not particularly ground-breaking news that society, by the way, tells women to adhere to unattainable standards of beauty these days. The messages are everywhere - in films, fashion and the music industry. Even when you just want to get a spot of lunch at Itsu - what sort of marketing genius thinks it a good idea to plaster half-naked models on some of their packaging? I mean, if ever there were more of a reminder not to have lunch. Elsewhere, adverts like Rimmel tell us that a leather-clad Georgia Jagger on a motorbike epitomises the "London look" when we all know the London look involves a sweat-clad dishevelled girl pressed into someone's armpit on the tube. "The trouble is women internalise these oppressive messages which leads them to subconsciously ranking themselves lower in comparison to others," reveals Sweet. Nonetheless, us mere mortals are really trying hard to reach these ideals. With the rise of social media, such as Instagram and Facebook, we are striving more than ever to keep up appearances. "It's natural to want to look good," notes Thomas, "but now women are armed with a camera phone and an idea they have to manage their own brand." Scary stuff. Miley Cyrus' performance at the MTV VMA Awards caused a stir - but many of the girls (and boys) watching will be analysing her 'ideal' body Grace Childs, a clinical psych at South Essex Trust agrees: "Girls are ever more committed to looking a certain way - they're getting better at it. This is upping the stakes for everyone, resulting in increasingly drastic measures being taken by girls in order to keep up. Obsession And this obsessive behaviour is becoming normalised. My mind races to that Perle du Lait advert as a small piece of evidence for the competition felt by women and the steps they will take to keep up. It is an advert in which a dinner party host offers her three female guests pudding. Pudding ... Pud-ding. The ladies are astounded, they've not let themselves have pud-ding since their ninth birthday (I'm guessing). They're just as slim as their svelte host but how, oh how, can the host afford to eat pudding? Long story short, the guests raid her house, as we all would in the face of such an offer- naturally. Bizarrely enough they find nothing under the sofa or in the drawers which answers this pudding conundrum. Then they find out the host means yoghurt and then they all laugh because they are all thrilled about that ... personally I do not class yoghurt as pudding. At moments like that, it would seem the entirety of female society is doomed. Programmed to look for an approval, which apparently only comes once we reach a certain "size 8 curvy figure" (an oxymoron if ever I heard one). Then, to add insult to injury, society keeps recommending yoghurt as a way to get there. OK, perhaps I am overreacting, especially about Perle du Lait. Sometimes it's easy to drown in the shallows. Izzy, a researcher at the BBC, gives me a reality check. Yes, I look at other women and sometimes think DAMN IT, when they look good. But when I'm just having a fun time, I really couldn't care less," she says, assertively. It would seem our own happiness has a direct effect on how we look at others. My advice to those who keep comparing themselves to other women? Go and do something with your time that gives you a greater sense of self. Pick up a hobby, learn a language, enrich your life," Sweet suggests. Maybe I will, after all, speaking French might give me an edge on the competition, right? Julia Oliphant is a 23 year-old budding journalist who lives and works in London. She writes a blog Losing Our Edge with journalist Alicia Burrell.