Leisel Jones reveals "psychotic" pursuit of gold medal at Beijing Olympic Games in 2008 cost her Retired swimming legend Leisel Jones. Leisel Jones shows her gold medal after the women's 4x100 medley relay final at the Beijing Games. LEISEL Jones says her Olympic gold medal came at the cost of her mental health. The retired four-time Olympian has revealed her entire self-worth was invested in winning in the lead up to the Beijing Games in 2008. I won an Olympic gold medal but at what cost? Jones said. It totally cost me my mental health, my well-being. I am very happy to have it, but it cost me so much. Jones spoke to The Sunday Telegraph about her "psychotic" pursuit of gold so young athletes can learn from her mistakes and to emphasis how important caring for one's mental health is. She said back then she felt she couldn't live if she couldn't be known as an Olympic gold medallist. I was psychotic about winning. It was the be all and end all," Jones said. I long-jumped over the line of craziness to get to that point ... it came at a cost of relationships, family and social time. I was a mess. I was just running on adrenalin. Just surviving. There were crazy diets. I was just a basket case. I was horrible to be around. It was pretty tough. At the time it was really important to win it. Looking back, would I do it again? I am not quite sure. Following her experience, the 28-year-old is now studying to become a psychologist in the hope of preventing athletes from enduring the same harrowing times she endured. Editorial: Time we put our athletes' well-being before glory By late 2010, she had fallen into depression, she struggled to train and had suicidal thoughts, but was led out of this darkness by her long-time psychologist Lisa Stevens. "She was phenomenal," Jones said. Finally, my mental health started to come first. Jones's story is not rare. Many of Australia's finest athletes have and do suffer mentally in the pursuit of success. Former olympic swimmer Ian Thorpe says he drank to cover emotional pain. Last year, five-time Olympic champion Ian Thorpe revealed he had suicidal thoughts and drank to cover his emotional pain in the lead up to the Athens Olympics. Triple Olympic gold medallist Petria Thomas once overdosed on paracetamol. Sprint queen Libby Trickett would often break down in tears when she first retired from swimming in 2010. Geoff Huegill took anti-depressants on and off for six years and fell hard into a party lifestyle following his first retirement in 2004. The black dog doesn't just chase our swimmers. I've had crippling depression, says swimming legend Ian Thorpe Former Wallaby Ben Tune spoke publicly this year of his suicide attempt and using prescription drugs, exposing his past to help remove the stigma of depression. NRL star Brett Seymour to Collingwood's Harry O'Brien have all been trapped in the cycle of depression. Our greatest have struggled and the question has to be asked; 'Are Australia's sporting bodies doing enough to care and protect their athletes?' Jeff Bond, who was the head of psychology at the Australian Institute of Sport for 22 years, replies unequivocally; "No, no, no, absolutely not." He says performance is now valued over mental health. "Sports clubs and bodies go to great lengths to protect the athletes because they want them on the field to win but by the same token we do not protect them," Bond said. Bond points out the Athens Olympics 'Lay down Sally' affair and James Magnussen's emotional turmoil during last year's London Olympics as when a sports psychologist should have been at the scene. Leisel Jones arrives back in Sydney with her silver medal from the 2012 London Games. Picture: Brad Hunter Source: News Limited Olympic great Ian Thorpe, who struggled with depression during his career, and still does to this day, believes more must be done to protect athletes. "I think we need to look at the long-term implications of being put into situations that are quite unique to sport," Thorpe told The Sunday Telegraph. There is an expectation on athletes that all of us will behave ourselves, we will be in these high-profile positions and we will know exactly what to do in them. We become role models, all these things you can't really be taught quickly. Former Wallaby star Ben Tune says he won't beat depression but he is now a better man Trickett, who found it hard to even get out of bed at times in 2010 when wrestling with a retirement, raises the responsibilities of the athlete on this issue. "On some levels I don't think there is enough being done," Trickett said. But on some levels, how much is it the responsibility of the individual and how much is it the responsibility of the sport? I think it is about finding that balance where sports psychology isn't being jammed down the athlete's throat and the athlete taking enough initiative to say; `I am not handling this, who can I speak to to effectively use my thoughts, or lessen my stress _ or alternatively with retirement, how do I process it and make it work for me? It's hard enough being a teenager let alone a teen sporting prodigy, notes adolescent psychologist Dr Michael Carr-Gregg. He dubs being a teen champion, like Trickett, Thorpe and Jones did, in any sport "phenomenally difficult." "I can not express to you how much admiration I have for the ones who have made it," Dr Carr-Gregg says. They deserve everything they get. Former Olympic and Australian swimmer Petria Thomas spoke out about depression in athletes. While Jones said growing up as teenager in the spotlight was no doubt difficult - she first suffered depression after she wrestled with the fallout of her silver medal at the Olympics in 2004 - her life went haywire when her identity started to obsessively revolve around becoming an Olympic gold medallist. "When the depression side left, it just turned into psychosis about winning," Jones said. That's what it takes to win, you have to be a bit mental, and I was. All the best people are a bit crazy about winning but it does certainly come at a cost. Depression haunts Aussie swimmer Petria Thomas In her pursuit of Olympic gold she embarked on a "crazy" diet of cereal for breakfast, an apple for lunch and then soup for dinner coupled with six hours of training. "It was just insane," Jones said. I am learning at uni that brains really don't like you not giving it food, that definitely played a massive role in not mentally being very well. It's only until now that it's really sunk in that swimming is just something you do, it's not who you are. By London I had realised what a blip on the radar you are when it comes to world issues. Swimming became purely for my enjoyment, I mean I am not curing cancer, I had that perspective. If I had have got fifth in Beijing I would have been torn apart but fifth in London I was like; 'woo hoo'. Ben Tune, former Wallabies player, opened up on his drug addiction, depression and suicide attempts. Picture: Russell Shakespeare Source: News Limited What can now be revealed was that it was massive feat for Jones to make it to the world championships in 2011 and London after dealing with the darkest days of her life. It was late in 2010 she struggled to train and when she did she was often in tears constantly. She had suicidal thoughts. "It was the worst I had ever been," Jones said. I thought; if I don't have swimming, I don't have anything else, so what's the point? When you are out of it, you can't believe you were in it. I just had to dig through it. Thorpe, Trickett and Jones all urged young athletes to take a more "holistic" approach to sport. "Just be interested in something else," Jones said. Just make sure you are nurturing yourself with something that makes you happy, because I certainly didn't do that at all. Don't ever sacrifice your mental health. If you or someone you know may be at risk of suicide contact, Lifeline on 13 11 14.