'Paul Hollywood's disdainful squint is the scariest part' But, like so many cookery books it had sat on the shelf all year - like an Englishman on Man City's subs" bench. Slowly being forgotten. Perhaps now its time had come. So, I said "yes" and immediately took the pressure off myself (anyone will tell you that I play snooker, scrabble and tennis to win - even if I normally lose) by repeating that winning wasn't important here. I should just go out and enjoy it. But then my professionalism took over and I decided that in order to give myself the best chance of at least holding my own, I should practise making each dish prior to going on the show; twice. READ: The GBBO finalists in their own kitchens We were given the task of making a pizza; it would be my first. For the base, I followed Paul's recipe from the book he'd given me which had pictures of Paul making the base at every stage. Nigel doesn't go in for pictures of himself making things. But, heck, those pictures of Paul dusting and kneading and spinning were damn useful. I was even tempted to put on a tight, black shirt for the full Hollywood effect. I decided to take a risk with the toppings - I went for walnuts and blue cheese, with chorizo and pesto. And peas. And apple. I felt I was on to a winner. And to my surprise it tasted pretty good although I knew on the day I'd have to work harder at my base. READ: Great British Bake Off: five best moments After years of going to bed thinking of how to improve sketches, jokes, scenes, I couldn't believe I was lying awake working out how to improve a pizza. And, worryingly, enjoying it. For our "show-stopper," we were asked to make a two-tiered, fully iced cake with a piece of sporting equipment on the top. I had never "iced," never made a two-tiered cake and have never been able to make anything with my hands - I was even poor at sandcastles. But the experiments began. Again the image went round and round in my head by night. How was I going to write Hawkeye's "in" or "out"? Could I pipe chocolate? I had never piped in my life. How could I use fresh strawberries and yet not have them melt the icing sugar? And so to the tent... Talking through your recipe ideas in front of Paul and Mary is possibly the scariest part. Paul listens to everything with that disdainful squint before usually saying an unreadable, multi-purpose "good luck!" And Mary's beatific air and sympathetic nodding did little to put me at ease either. She makes you feel encouraged but you know from the angle of her chin that deep down you know nothing. And did I win? Well, at least my Paul Hollywood impersonation took the biscuit. Now, does anyone want to know what Prince Charles is like...? Or Tony Blair's tennis? The Great Sport Relief Bake Off starts on BBC Two on Monday 13 November at 8.30pm READ: Behind the scenes of The Great British Bake Off