With any luck, David Beckham's briefs will never come off I should explain. Beckham's new 30-second underwear advert for H&M, directed by Nicolas Winding Refn, will premiere on Sunday, during the second quarter of the Super Bowl, and the savvy clothing giant has asked anyone who's interested to go to their website and choose between two different endings - #covered or #uncovered. But starkers or not, the former footballer's advert will make history. It is the first to be outfitted with technology that will allow owners of a particularly smart TV to click on his briefs and buy them straight from their TV. "T-commerce" or "Beckham's revolution" as it is being called here, is a shudderingly awful concept, even for internet shopping addicts like myself. TV used to be a safe haven, providing momentary respite from my bidding wars on eBay, Amazon one-click binges and endless "wishlist" compilations on Net-a-Porter. "T-commerce" won't be limited to inter-programme advertising; so from the moment I'm able to buy Don Draper's lucite coffee table on Mad Men, Kerry Washington's Michael Kors cashmere coat during an episode of Scandal, the incidental music off The Good Wife or a large thin-crust Papa John pizza with extra pepperoni at the push of a button, it'll all be over for me - and millions of like-minded materialists. Battles over the remote will turn ugly, marriages will break down and bailiffs will be called: we'll all be stuck in consumerist prisons of our own making. Worse still, it'll reduce every actor, presenter - even politician - to mere models and brand ambassadors. Nobody will be listening to Paxman's arguments or Cameron's policies, instead they'll be wondering whether that M&S cashmere jumper comes in a burgundy or if Richard James does that tie in a pinstripe. This is fine for Beckham, who belongs in a shop window wearing a designer suit, but slightly demeaning for everyone else. It doesn't bode well, either, for any TV personalities of advancing years, whose endorsement capacities are necessarily on the wane. Not that Beckham, like Madonna, will allow ageing to hamper any lucrative marketing possibilities going forward. In 30 years" time he'll still be all but naked on our TV screens: we'll just be one-click-buying his bath tub safety seat instead.