Pressing Beyond a Violent Path for Her Daughters" Sake Vonmarie Marrero, 20, "was mad at the world" after she was put in foster care at age 12. On the day she was to be initiated into a gang, she learned she was pregnant, and decided to change. Alyssa Marrero, 4, sat staring out a window as she waited with her mother for food vouchers they needed to buy milk, beans and bread. They were on their monthly visit to the Women, Infants and Children center on the Upper East Side, a trip that has become routine for Alyssa, who looks like a miniature replica of her mother, Vonmarie Marrero. They both have brown hair with strawberry-red streaks, and glowing hazel eyes that Ms. Marrero pointed out, as Alyssa smiled, showing off a space where her two front baby teeth used to be. Alyssa attends the same school and lives in the same housing project as Ms. Marrero did at her age. She seems to be following in her mother's footsteps. That is what worries Ms. Marrero, a single mother of two. "In the past, I made bad decisions and sacrificed more for other people than for me," she said. I have my daughters now, and they're my life. They deserve better, and I will give it to them. But the path to self-sufficiency has been hard for Ms. Marrero, 20, who is homeless and searching for a job. She has moved several times in the past two months, shuffling between homes and shelters and occasionally depending on relatives and even abusive boyfriends, she said. To become independent, Ms. Marrero, who never graduated from high school, has pushed to complete both G.E.D. and job-placement programs. She has held various jobs, including cooking and cleaning at McDonald's and greeting people at B&H, the electronics store near Pennsylvania Station. Despite her efforts, she said, she always runs into obstacles, caused by a chaotic, violent past and associations with the wrong people. "I try to be better," she said, "but the picture is always dark no matter how you paint it." Ms. Marrero said her troubles began when she was placed in foster care at age 12 after she and her mother had a bad argument. She drifted away from relatives and sought comfort by bonding with the Bloods gang, and grew confrontational and unruly. "I was mad at the world at that time," she said. But on the day of her initiation into the gang, she discovered she was pregnant. "That's when I looked at myself and said, "This is not me," " she said. That's not where I wanted to be. Ms. Marrero was 16 and living in a homeless shelter. She decided to change her life to become a better mother. She moved into the home of a relative with whom she had reconnected through Facebook. But tensions grew over finances: she could not find a job or move into her own apartment. "The cycle continued," Ms. Marrero said. She and her daughter eventually went to stay with a boyfriend. The two shared one bedroom in a three-bedroom apartment in the Taft housing projects with his mother and brother. But the couple soon had troubles, and sought counseling at the Stanley M. Isaacs Neighborhood Center on the Upper East Side after their daughter, Maya, was born. Alyssa and Maya, now 2, are living with the couple's turmoil, Ms. Marrero said, adding that she had nowhere else to turn, so she was staying with the boyfriend. "I don't want my daughters to see this," Ms. Marrero said, "but what choice do I have? I hope they understand when they're older. Last year, Ms. Marrero was relying on $104 a month in public assistance and food stamps. She said she tried to use the little money she had to ease tensions with her relatives, helping to pay her mother's rent and buying food and drinks on Thanksgiving Day. "I was like Santa Claus for the month of November," she said. I gave 100 percent, but nobody is there when I need a hand. When the chaos overwhelms her, she walks outside, even on a chilly day in January, a cigarette in hand, thinking of what she can do to escape what seems like a perpetual cycle of misery. "I feel like I will break down, but I don't for my daughters," she said. Ms. Marrero said she hoped that one day her work would be enough to break the cycle. She is eagerly awaiting a tax refund, praying that it will be enough to rent a studio apartment that will give her daughters the life she had dreamed of as a child. "Vonmarie is determined for success," said Shannon Ferguson, her caseworker and counselor at the Stanley Isaac Center. Ms. Ferguson said she had helped Ms. Marrero when she went from a shelter to live with the boyfriend, and also helped her complete the G.E.D. program. But in the fall, Alyssa needed a uniform to attend Public School 375 in Manhattan. The Stanley Isaac Center, a member of the Federation of Protestant Welfare Agencies, one of the seven agencies supported by The New York Times Neediest Cases Fund, drew $80.50 from the fund to buy shirts, a skirt and pants for Alyssa's uniform. Ms. Marrero said the grant helped bring normalcy to Alyssa. Their next step is to secure an apartment. Ms. Marrero said she was staying strong for her daughters. "They keep me together," she said. I push for them. "Step by step," she added, "we will start a new life."