PMQs sketch: 'Muttering idiot' makes Daddy jolly cross When he takes off his jacket and rolls up his sleeves, you find yourself thinking, "Ooh, Daddy means business." When he declares that he's going to protect Britain from the Eurozone crisis, you think, "Don't worry, Daddy's here." When his face reddens at the dispatch box, you think, "Uh-oh, Daddy's getting cross." And when he's photographed throwing his arms in the air to celebrate Chelsea winning the football, you think, "Oh Daaaaad, pur-LEASE don't embarrass us..." Then there's his sardonic mirth. If you've never seen Mr Balls laugh, imagine an evil James Corden: chuckling and chortling, head nodding, shoulders shaking. His whole body vibrates, as if he were sitting on a hyperactive washing machine. Initially, Daddy weathered this onslaught of derision. But then, after 25 minutes, he snapped. "We need innovative ways of using our hard-won credibility," he said, his voice abruptly rising. Which we wouldn't have if we'd listened to the muttering idiot opposite! Instant glee from both sides. Tory glee at seeing Mr Balls abused; Labour glee at seeing Mr Cameron riled. John Bercow, the Speaker, ordered him to withdraw the word "idiot." He did, albeit in the least gracious way he could think of: "I'll replace it with "the man who left us this enormous deficit and this financial crisis"!" Mr Balls sat back, looking deeply satisfied with his afternoon's work. Poor Daddy. Until then, he'd kept his temper in check. He'd smoothly quoted the IMF's Christine Lagarde, who said yesterday that "If no fiscal consolidation programme had been decided [by George Osborne], I shiver." "Brrrrr!" shouted Tory MPs triumphantly. And he'd coped with Ed Miliband's questions about the "fire-at-will" Beecroft Report. It probably helped that the Lib Dem members of the Cabinet, all of whom oppose Beecroft, were oddly absent. Once he began his post-PMQs statement, Mr Cameron regained his composure. Serious, Responsible Daddy was back. He even apologised to Dennis Skinner, that other great Labour heckler, for having been "sharp" with him in the past. The MP for Bolsover was, he said, "a tremendous ornament to the House." Mr Skinner, who likes nothing better than needling Mr Cameron, looked somewhat deflated. Perhaps if the Prime Minister wants to annoy Mr Balls, that's what he should do. Be nice to him.