Fordyce Maxwell: The car washer and inveterate grass cutter might think the same about me MOST of us have chores to do to keep house and home ticking over. Some we don't mind, some we dislike, a few we might rather enjoy. Interestingly - and I do realise that might be seen by critics as a challenge rather than a statement - chores in those three categories vary greatly from person to person. For example, I don't mind getting a bucket and sponge to wash the car occasionally. Good exercise while it lasts, with a satisfying result. But I frequently pass a man who washes his car at least twice a week, and when he's not washing seems to be polishing. Before I mellowed - believe me, I am working at it - I used to think, "Little enough to do," as I walked past. Now I think: "Well, it's up to him. Not much of a way to spend your life, but his choice. The same is true of cutting grass. I don't mind the job and usually keep the dandelions and creeping buttercups at bay. But the other extreme of hours a week spent on cutting and manicuring a lawn when there are books to read, vegetables to grow, walks to take and places to go, is, to me, as pointless as extreme car washing. Then I realise that the car washer and inveterate grass cutter might think the same about me. Why read a book when you can cut grass? Why walk when you can wash and polish? The inescapable chores tend to be inside, such as cleaning bathrooms, washing the kitchen floor, dusting, vacuuming, ironing, cooking. Even before we ran a bed and breakfast business for several years I was quite good at most of those chores; I exclude ironing and cooking because Liz is so much better at them and I compensate by doing one or two chores that are on her dislike list. I'm good at and almost enjoy most of them, partly because I once shared a flat and ancient bathroom for two years with four other young professionals and have been in over-reaction ever since. And partly because I take the Zen approach - I use the word Zen loosely, as in "I think I know what I'm talking about, but don't bet on it" - of inner peace of mind while doing a job as thoroughly as possible, whether it is skilled or menial. The present is the only reality, each move a unique event in itself, not a means to an end. That all comes together best when cleaning and polishing shoes. Line up four or five pairs, remove any mud or dirt, apply polish to all, then start on the line again and polish till they glow. Try it, and peace be with you. Last week Fordyce... was talking to a friend who said: "It's comforting to know there WAS a difference between my mother's family and my father's - 50 per cent of my mother's were alcoholics, 100 per cent of my father's."