Jodi Arias Reads From Her Diary in Court Well they've gained magnolia street exists because they -- right now that -- Travis safety Alexander so completely that they don't know any other way to be. I wish I did because at times my heart is sick and sad and over -- -- -- come to pass. I don't understand it and at times -- still have a heart of the Levy. He makes me sick. And he makes me happy he makes me sad and miserable. And he makes me feel uplifted and beautiful. And I should be -- -- as if he makes the illness. -- -- -- -- -- It all originates from within all of my darkness as a result of my own creation it is the fair my last planted continually didn't do much repetition. Can we keep reading -- -- -- You say are your darkness. As a result of my own creation. What do you -- what -- -- telling -- -- about. The relationship Travis which is. Later this as a result it has anything. When he's not happy -- time about themselves and here. He's they are song. Actually you where did he need to hear those things. -- you -- that right OK. You say it all originates from what. Me. Well what does that mean in other residents from -- To me that that just means that I'm responsible for how I feel news. -- is not. Although I -- certainly surround him I didn't want. They're trying to take responsibility for my own feelings -- is making me feel that way but that. The darkness that I -- is because of myself not because of him. -- your attention to. Second entry on. August 26 2007. -- -- -- -- -- -- I just wish I had done. -- -- -- This is suddenly as a way out. But it is -- -- I wouldn't feel any non payment by pitching -- existing had my consciousness. Dissolve into nothingness and the energy recycled into something else tinsel. For little used in the world right now --