Paul Kent looks at the worst excuses presented by athletes for testing positive for drugs US athlete Tyler Hamilton, US cyclist Tyler Hamilton and Australian cricketer Shane Warne. AND now, with a face so straight you could rule lines with it, we present the worst excuses ever made for testing positive to drugs. They are presented as a community service announcement to remind the Amnesty Advocates that the NRL will almost certainly join this colourful list if their "We didn't know it was illegal" excuse is officially passed into testimony and amnesty is awarded. The most brilliant case of mistaken identity. While Hamilton has since exposed the machine-like operation of Lance Armstrong's doping program, when he first got busted in 2004 he blamed the foreign blood cells found in his sample (which suggests blood doping) on a "vanishing twin." He claimed the blood came from his twin who died in his mother's womb. An Olympic sprinter, Mitchell claimed his elevated testosterone had nothing to do with drugs but everything to do with consuming five beers and having sex four times with his wife the night before his test. When Warne tested positive to a diuretic, he claimed vanity was his only sin. Warne claimed his mother gave him a "fluid tablet" because his face was looking puffy. The reigning men's Olympic 100m champion, Gatlin tested positive to testosterone in 2006. Gatlin was indignant, and blamed the positive testosterone test on his masseur Christopher Whetstine for rubbing a cream into his buttocks without his knowledge - which sounds more than enough to get indignant about. An Olympic champion, Baumann claimed he never used drugs. No, he tested positive because somebody injected his toothpaste with performance-enhancing drugs. Remember that line on television we're forever told, telling us to always read the label first? Edwards, a Welsh shot putter, failed miserably when he tested positive to steroids. He claimed he failed to check the label and accidentally drank a bottle of shampoo. Australia's first high-profile drug bust, Riley was later cleared after her coach took responsibility for giving her a "headache tablet" the night before a race. It turned out to be a stimulant, and with that one moment Australia used up its Get Out Of Jail Free card. Bonds, America's all-time home run king, never tested positive but has had his reputation tarnished after his name was connected to the BALCO drug scandal. He claimed he believed his trainer was massaging him with flaxseed oil. How this contributed to his skull growing two sizes bigger, requiring a new baseball cap, has not been adequately explained. Poor Marco Borriello tested positive, he claimed, after swallowing an ointment that his girlfriend was using to treat a sexual infection. A Major League baseballer, Ramirez went down after claiming that his doctor mistakenly gave him a female fertility drug. Tested positive after eating veal that he did not know had been steroid-fed. It sounded reasonable enough, until testing showed that to reach the levels found in his blood he'd have to eat 40 calves a day for 20 years. A bob-sledder who ate at the same restaurant as Korda. He claimed his elevated nandrolone levels came from the beef in his spaghetti sauce. A German cyclist, Henn was busted with high testosterone levels. Nothing to do with cheating. Apparently tired of waiting any longer, his in-laws had given him a herb mixture to increase his fertility. Ullrich never took amphetamines, which he tested positive for, but did remember he took "two little pills" the night before his test. Go figure. Forget misread labels or contaminated meat; Sotomayor's positive to cocaine goes to the heart of the Cold War. A Cuban high jumper, he blamed his positive on the Cuban-American mafia. More, on live TV, Cuban President Fidel Castro declared it was a war against Cuba by "professionals of counter-revolution and crime." He meant America. Johnson blamed everybody after his positive to stanazolol at the Seoul Olympics. At one point he blamed a spiked sarsaparilla and ginseng energy drink. He has since confessed. Johnson also promotes a ginseng drink. It's called Cheetah.