Russell Brand is many things For all his faults - and there genuinely are too many to list - the presenter-cum-actor-cum-comedian-cum-author has one key attribute that leaves lesser (nicer, kinder) men in the shade and casts an irresistible spell over women: the gift of the gab. Think Cyrano de Bergerac and all is explained. He, you may recall, from the 1897 play by Edmond Rostand, was the talented but ugly French nobleman whose large nose made him self-conscious. Although himself in love with Roxane, he agrees to court her with witty, intellectual letters and mellifluous verse on behalf of his handsome friend, Christian. It later transpires that Roxane was so moved by his lyrical poems that love blossomed despite his unfortunate physiognomy. In the original, Cyrano dies before she can tell him her feelings. The Hollywood version, with Steve Martin, had the obligatory schmalzy ending tacked on. And what about real life? Will Russell and Jemima, 39, the heiress to a £20 million fortune, live happily ever after? It seems about as unlikely as Brand getting a haircut and a Savile Row suit, but right now, the pair are behaving like doe-eyed teenagers. Mother-of-two Khan, once a vocal supporter of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange until the scales fell from her eyes, obviously enjoys a challenge and is presumably amused by Brand's relentless charm offensive. For his part, the Essex-born autodidact has carved a career for himself that, miraculously, has survived any number of woefully ill-judged stunts, proving he can talk his way out of (and, by extension, into) anything. Who can forget how, in 2008, he was forced to slink away in disgrace after his unpleasant wind-up call, on Jonathan Ross's Radio 2 show, to national treasure Andrew Sachs, in which he lewdly referred to a sexual encounter with the 83-year-old actor's granddaughter? Or that he was axed from an obscure radio station for reading out pornography live on air. And, of course, the outrage he caused when he turned up to work at MTV the day after the 9/11 bombings dressed as Osama bin Laden (for which he was sacked), and consternation at the 2008 MTV Awards when, as the compere, he described the then-US president George W Bush as (and I dare you not to laugh) "a retarded cowboy fella" who in Britain "wouldn't be trusted with scissors." But - and it's a game-changer - Brand is immensely articulate and funny. Very, very funny. His humour may be puerile (see above) but it hits more often than it misses, and it is peppered moreover with seductive erudition. His ironically titled 2007 autobiography My Booky Wook (followed by My Booky Wook 2: This Time it's Personal) was a critically acclaimed, vivid and wholly literate read, in which his "exploration of London's Hogarthian underbelly" was gleefully laid bare in unflinching detail. And words have a way with women that hearts and flowers can never match. But only for so long. Brand, who married American singer Katy Perry in a traditional Hindu ceremony in Rajastan in 2009, filed for divorce 14 months later. She says he dumped her by text. He has never spoken to her since. But there's a new conquest along every minute and it's not just Brand's silvery tongue (ewww...) that causes otherwise sensible women to swoon. It's the whole bad-boy-in-desperate-need-of-redemption package. Although men have no idea, obviously, women are covertly competitive to an incredible, internicine degree. It's a rare woman who isn't tempted by the prospect of allowing herself to be wooed and won by a dodgy Alpha Male specifically in order to demonstrate her superior ability to domesticate and, quite possibly, emasculate him. But with Brand, the odds are stacked against this approach, because while he may be many things, a keeper he ain't. He may smoulder with passion and simmer with desire like a rattling pot on the stove, but for men like him, it's the thrill of the chase that keeps them interested. There's a dangerous intensity to his "trust in me" gaze, reminiscent of Kaa, the snake in The Jungle Book. Yes, it may be balm to the soul of women accustomed to playing second fiddle to her partner's smartphone or football team. But for Brand, women (all women) are his sport. And whether he's playing Khan like a fool, only time will tell.