Warning girls about dangers of alcohol is not shaming them Daisy Coleman's story has raised the debate about the dangers of alcohol for girls. WHO'S got more chance of being sexually assaulted? A woman who's stone cold sober, or one who's drunk a schooner of pure grain alcohol and is about to pass out? Let me assure you, it's the latter. There is plentiful evidence to shows that young women who are drunk are at greater risk of sexual assault. That is not victim blaming, it's just common sense. So why are so many feminists attacking anyone who talks about the link between sexual assault and drinking? When my daughter is old enough to go to parties, I'll be telling her how important it is for her to stay in control. I'll be telling her that bad things can and do happen to good girls and that some males will take advantage of her if she is not sober enough to say no, or fight them off. The debate started when Daisy Coleman from Maryville, Missouri, told her story a few days ago. As Daisy tells it, she and a friend snuck out at night and went to another house to party. They were only 13 and 14. A boy at the party gave Daisy five shots of 100 per cent proof alcohol poured in a large cup known to the boys as the "bitch glass." Soon after, she passed out. Sometime later the boys left Daisy nearly naked in the snow outside her house and a medical examination showed she had been raped. The feminist fracas started when journalist Emily Yoffe wrote in Slate that college women should stop getting drunk in order to keep themselves safe. She was responding to Daisy's story. I've been to university in the US and know first-hand that she's right. But all hell broke loose and Yoffe was accused of victim blaming, slut shaming and "making he world a little bit safer for rapists." I just don't buy it. Instead, I passionately believe we need to talk about what girls need to do to keep themselves safe. Daisy's story brought home to me the need to educate, not only our boys but our girls as well. For instance, researchers from the University of Wollongong recently found 23 per cent of women aged 18 to 24 experienced negative sexual situations such as sexual harassment and even rape after excessive drinking. And 44 per cent said they never, or rarely, use a condom during sex after binge drinking. US studies show a similar pattern: that one in five college students becomes a victim of sexual assault, and more than 80 per cent of cases involve alcohol. The debate comes at a time when young people are drinking more than ever and at a younger age. Just last week 70 Carey Grammar year 12 students were suspended because they had been drinking before school. We're also heading into a boozy time of year, with races, backyard parties and end-of-year events all centred on alcohol. So our sons and daughters need to be armed with as much knowledge as possible. I am not saying that a drunk woman invites sexual assault or rape, or should be blamed. Let me be clear: rape is caused by rapists, not drunk girls. But girls do need to know it is more likely that something bad may happen to them if they are too drunk to say no, fight back, or run away. I've talked about what I will teach my daughter. Rest assured, I will be teaching my son the importance of respecting women and of making sure that all sexual contact is fully consensual. And, yes, I will teach him that a girl too drunk to say no to sex is not saying yes. Men who rape are ultimately responsible, but in many cases the women they target are the ones who are too drunk to remember, or too wasted to fight back. Blog with Susie at Susieobrien.com.au and twitter @susieob