Johnston cleared, but fears name is tarnished "I tried to stay positive": Curtis Johnston. Curtis Johnston, the first rugby league player stood down following the Australian Crime Commission's report into drugs in sport, fears his name will remain tarnished despite being cleared of doping by the Australian Sports Anti-Doping Authority. The North Sydney winger has been cleared to resume his playing career after he was investigated for allegedly admitting to using performance-enhancing drugs in a text message. From the outset, the 23-year-old maintained he was simply engaging in banter with a Bears teammate, although the exchange is believed to have taken place with the teammate's ex-girlfriend. Not playing, not being around the boys, that's really done your head in and drives you nuts. On Tuesday ASADA cleared Johnston, eight weeks after his career was put on hold. The prolific try-scorer described the wait as "torture" and admitted he feared his dream of playing in the NRL was over. "Not playing, not being around the boys, that's really done your head in and drives you nuts," he said. There were times when I thought this would be it, a two-year ban would probably have ended my career. I tried not to think about it too much . . . I tried to stay positive. They never had anything on me, I hadn't done anything and they couldn't prove anything. It was a good outcome. Johnston, who scored a season-high 28 tries in the NSW Cup in 2011, said there would always be a "cloud" over his name despite the verdict. For sure, people won't notice the 28 tries I scored in 2011, when I was leading the try-scorers. They will think I scored them because I was a drug cheat," he said. Johnston returned to Bears training for the first time on Tuesday night and received a round of applause from players and officials. However, with Beau Champion making his return from injury to North Sydney, he may have to wait another week before donning the red and black. "The North Sydney club welcome him back with open arms," Bears boss Greg Florimo said. We look forward to his impact back on the field, we've missed him over the last few weeks. I'm certain he'll come back and be desperate to prove to everyone he's a fantastic rugby league player. Johnston's father Col, thanked the club and former Bears president Mike Gibbons, who provided legal advice, for their support. "I never want to go through that two months again." he said. [The decision] is a great relief for everyone. Johnston is still confident of realising his dream of playing in the NRL. "I know I'm capable of playing first grade," he said. I've just got to get back on the field and get my body fit. My mind's there, I'm ready to play.