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Since its genesis, a lot of clever people have sought to improve the function of the Ar-15 rifle. Side-charging handles, ambidextrous controls, and "B.A.D levers", just to name a few. Some of these features were adopted, and some were fads that quickly fell by the wayside. One company, Cobalt Kinetics, has brought to market some rifles with a suite of features that, in my opinion, greatly enhance the Ar-15 rifle.
Several months ago I was provided a Cobalt Kinetics Eclipse for testing. To date I have shot 300 rounds through the Cobalt Kinetics Eclipse. Distances ranged from 15 yards to 700 yards, and I found the rifle to have a match-grade level of accuracy. Before we get into testing, let's look at the features that make these rifles special.
Key Features and specification of the Cobalt Kinetics Eclipse
The Cobalt Kinetic Eclipse is a "tactical carbine" and unlike its flashy, space-age looking brothers and sisters, who are more geared towards competition, this is geared towards law enforcement and home-defense. The Eclipse has a collapsible butt stock, A2 compensator, and 15 inch M-LOK handguard. The Eclipse has some features that are found only on Cobalt Kinetics Rifles. Lets look at these features closer.
The receivers and handguard on the Cobalt Kinetic Eclipse are made of 7075 aluminum. Military grade Ar-15's are made of 7075 Aluminum, but the handguards are typically made of 6061 aluminum. Cobalt is using 7075 for all of the Aluminum parts on their rifles. This will raise the cost, but you are guaranteed to have one of the strongest handguards available. In regard to coatings, the receivers and handguard are type III hard coat anodized then re-coated with Cerakote. Essentially these rifles have 2 layers of protective coating.
The magazine release, selector, and charging handle are fully ambidextrous. The trigger is a drop in, single stage, and match grade. To me, the most interesting feature is the DUAL DROP mechanism found on every Cobalt Kinetics Rifle. The DUAL DROP leverages the forward assist, and not only does it push the bolt into battery if the rifle is dirty, it also activates the bolt-release mechanism if the bolt is locked to the rear. This function can speed up your re-loads, depending on the situation. The DUAL DROP appears as if the rifle has two forward assists. Both function identically. The first time I saw this mechanism was at the 2016 SHOT SHOW is Las Vegas. I thought it was a tad gimmicky until I got to shoot with it at night. This is an awesome feature that I will discuss later.
For the Eclipse, Cobalt Kinetics used a 16 inch, .223 Wylde, 5R, 1/8 twist, button rifled, 4150 CMV barrel that is treated with a lithium-Iron surface conversion. Lithium-Iron surface conversions are very similar to QPQ nitrocarburizing, but yield a stronger and more heat and erosion resistant finish. Lithium-Iron surface conversions are fairly new to the Industry, and to my knowledge Cobalt Kinetics is the only company using this technique on their barrels and bolt carrier groups. What is interesting is that Cobalt Kinetics will drill out their gas port, then do the Lithium-Iron surface conversion. This will mitigate gas port erosion and end users will get a barrel with a very long lifespan.
Operating System
Cobalt Kinetics rifles have a military grade bolt carrier group. The bolt carrier is made of 8620 steel and the bolt is made of 9310 steel. Like the barrel, the bolt carrier group also has a Lithium-Iron conversion. Lithium-Iron surface conversions are state of the art and, as previously mentioned, Cobalt Kinetics are the only company currently using this technique on their bolt carrier groups and barrels.
Long range and Accuracy Testing
Long range and accuracy testing was done at the family ranch in the Highlands of Central New Mexico. The Eclipse is not touted as a long range weapon, but due to the construction of this rifle I could easily see it used as a "RECCE " or "Designated Marksmans Rifle". Prior to long range testing I swapped out the Mission First Tactical Battlelink Stock with a B5 Sopmod Enhanced stock and added some rail interfaces for a bipod as well as tripod mount. The Mission First stock is a good piece of hardware, but it does not mate well with a rear sandbag. For optics I used my trusty Bushnell HDMR. The HDMR is equipped with a Horus H59 reticle. Testing was done prone off of a loaded bipod. For accuracy testing, I used 69 grain, Federal Gold Medal Match ammunition. The Federal Gold Medal Match was loaded with the Sierra MATCHKING BTHP bullets.
Proning out behind the rifle, I dialed down the power on my Horus H59 reticle, aimed at a nearby hill adjacent to my paper target, found a rock, and fired off a round. I observed the "splash" in the grid of my Horus H59, dialed a few mils of elevation and windage, found my original target, fired, and was satisfied when my round impacted very near to my point of aim. Transitioning to an RE Factor Tactical Hitman Target, I aimed at the center of the target, and squeezed off a round. Getting a zero with a Horus reticle and 21 power scope is a breeze, and within 5 shots I had a solid zero.
During the long range portion of testing, I began to appreciate the DUAL DROP feature. The first time I used it, I was reloading from the prone. After ejecting an empty magazine, I inserted a new magazine, and since I float my thumb when I shoot precision rifle, I found that my thumb was immediately in-line with the right forward assist button. Pushing the button, it closed the bolt and I was able to commence firing. Another instance where I appreciated the DUAL DROP feature was when I was reloading my magazines, and experienced an aggressive burst of wind. I looked down and noticed that my bolt carrier was locked to the rear. Wanting to keep dust out, I simply reached down, pushed the forward assist and the bolt closed, thus keeping dust out of the receiver.
The Highlands of Central New Mexico tend to be a very windy place. Conditions were typical for Spring. Temperature hovered in mid-60's, and I had constant full value wind that fluctuated between 8 to 15 miles per hour. Shooting tiny groups in full value wind is less than ideal, but the Eclipse was engineered for real-world application, and wind is often a constant. I could probably have shot sub .5 MOA had I shot through a tunnel, but overall I was pleased. I tested two brands of ammunition, the previously mentioned Federal Gold Medal Match, as well as some 55 grain PMC Bronze. I shot 3, 5 round groups of each ammo type. At 100 yards the average 5 shot group of the Federal was .75 MOA, and the 55 grain PMC Bronze had an average 5 shot group size of 1.5 inches. After shooting the three, 5 round groups, I loaded a magazine with 10 rounds of Federal Gold Medal Match and did a drill that I refer to as "10 Rounds in 10 Seconds." The point of this drill is to fire 10 rounds as fast as possible at a target 100 yards away. You want to be accurate, but the point is to rapidly heat the barrel to get an idea of functional accuracy. According to my timer, I shot 10 rounds in 12 seconds and had a 1.5 MOA group. Impressed by the accuracy of this rifle at 100 yards, it was time to start moving back.
For long range testing, I hung two targets, an 8×10 inch steel plate as well as an 18 inch gong from our TFBTV Sponsor, Grizzly Targets. At this point of my testing, the wind picked up and I had to contend with 12 to 15 mile per hour wind. I shot at 500, 600, and 700 yards. I had a 100% hit ratio out to 500 yards on the 8 x 10 inch steel plate. Hitting the 8X10 inch plate became very difficult at 700 yards, but I was able to get solid hits on the 18 inch steel gong. I probably could have pushed it to 1000 yards with some 77 grain Sierras, but for all practical purposes, if you want to shoot past 700 yards you need an Ar-10 and a high B.C round. Below is a video of my 700 yard shot.
Short Range Testing
Short Range testing took place at some BLM land near my home outside of Albuquerque. For the short-range portion of the test, I re-attached the Mission First Tactical Battlelink Stock and installed a mini red dot sight. For this test I used a smattering of Federal XM193 and PMC Bronze. The Cobalt Kinetics Eclipse handled very well. The ambidextrous controls, crisp lightweight trigger, BeatenZone AMBI-7 charging handle, and enlarged magwell all melded together for a nice-handling rifle that was very efficient to operate.
After zeroing the red dot I did some static shooting on an 8 x 10 inch piece of steel at 25 yards to familiarize myself with the ambidextrous controls. I really appreciated the DUAL DROP feature when I started do shoulder transitions. For example, I manipulate fire control with my right hand. If I was behind a barricade and shooting around the right side of it, my left hand would be on the handguard and my right hand would be running the trigger. If I went to shoot around the left side of the barricade and I wanted to minimize my exposure, I would switch shoulders. This would place my right hand on the handguard and my left hand would be operating the trigger. I found that, if my magazine ran dry while shooting around the left side of a barricade, all I had to do was eject the magazine with my right hand, place a new magazine in the rifle and hit the right forward assist button to activate the DUAL DROP feature. These rifles are truly ambidextrous, and if an end user were to lose the use of one hand during a violent confrontation, they could run one of these rifles one handed. My respect for the DUAL DROP feature multiplied ten-fold when the sun dipped below the mountain, and I started shooting around barricades at night. While doing reloads in the dark, I found that I was a lot faster when using the DUAL DROP feature to close the bolt after reloading a new magazine. I found it was especially helpful when wearing gloves.
Below are some videos taken while shooting at night. In both of these videos I was practicing shoulder transitions.
Cobalt Kinetics makes excellent hardware. If you were to compare these rifles to any other Ar-15 in existence, in my opinion, these rifles would be in the top percentile. Cobalt Kinetics is making military grade rifles that are state-of-the-art, and their quality control is second to none. When I first saw the DUAL DROP features at the 2016 SHOT SHOW, I thought it as a tad gimmicky. After shooting north of 300 rounds and spending 9 hours on the range with the rifle I think it is an awesome feature that a certain segment of the market could appreciate. The DUAL DROP's are just big buttons that help you reload faster. People that get in gun fights, especially at night, could appreciate this feature, as well as Users who have musculoskeletal injuries. If the need arose, these rifles can be operated one-handed. The Cobalt Kinetics Eclipse, as demonstrated, would shine in a variety of roles. This year Cobalt Kinetics is bringing their patented CARS system to market. The CARS system ejects an empty magazine, then when a new magazine is inserted in the rifle, the bolt will close. I got to shoot a CARS equipped rifle at SHOT SHOW and it was pretty neat. If you live in the Albuquerque/Santa Fe area, and you want to check out a Cobalt Kinetics Rifle, BMC Tactical in Albuquerque has them in stock. Cobalt Kinetics rifles are very pricey.The Eclipse model I tested has an MSPR of $2,395. If you cannot afford one, contact BMC tactical and they can build you a custom rifle. It may not be state-of-the-art, but it will be nice and very reliable. BMC Tactical has a world class armorer on staff.
Cobalt Kinetics is fairly young company. It is staffed by a dynamic group of people who are passionate about innovation and quality. With their knowledge and capabilities, everything Cobalt does will be top notch. I look forward to what the future brings for this company, and I am keeping my fingers crossed for an Ar-10 derivative. Perhaps a .260 Remington with a 22 inch barrel…
A big thanks to Grizzly Targets and Cobalt Kinetics. Be sure to check out our YouTube Channel, TFBTV. As always tips, questions, comments and jokes are welcome in the comments below.


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Terms and Condition
All New generators are sold complete with 12 months Global Manufacturer Warranty. Used sets are sold subject to test and run to produce power. No warranty is implied or given on Used sets, but all Used sets are tested before sale. Any sales are subject to English Law in all respects.
Sets sold outside the UK will not attract UK Value Added Tax, subject to certain conditions being applied, the principle one being that VAT is charged and must be paid to the company, until a Shipping Bill of Laden copy is supplied to the company.
If the company carries out shipping, then we attend to this matter and VAT is not applied. All sets, New or Used, must have an Official Order from the purchaser, and payment must be made in Full on all sets, once Invoiced by the company.
Item Warranty
All goods paid for in full prior to delivery. Goods for export will require a copy of the Bill of Laden, before VAT can be refunded on any purchase. All Used equipment is sold as seen and no Warranty is implied or given, under any circumstances. All goods sold are sold subject to UK Law only. New machines are sold with a 12 months Worldwide Warranty.

subset: commoncrawl


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Blogging from A to Z ChallengeTheme: Movies reflect human needs...
|Image from storyblocks.com
To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. (Lewis B. Smedes)
The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world. (Marianne Williamson)
- His is not the main story in this film, but John Newton (Albert Finney) used to captain a slave ship and tells of his struggle to find forgiveness and peace. The beautiful hymn he wrote expresses part of that journey: "Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me." (I love this version, performed by Il Divo!) ("My Take" review of this film is found here.)
- Psychiatrist Dr. Davenport (Denzel Washington) counsels a man trying to overcome a painful past (Antwone, portrayed by Derek Luke), and gives Webster's definition of forgiveness, "Regard without ill will despite an offense."
- "I promise to pray for you every day, ask your forgiveness, grant you the same, and be your friend always." That is the grace card.
- Evelyn Ryan (Julianne Moore) tells her daughter she needs to forgive her father. "Forgive him. Forgive him so you can embrace this truly remarkable day." ("My Take" review of the film found here.)
- Bitterness and anger nearly destroy Ana Nichols (Minnie Driver). She has to learn to forgive Saul (Jeremy Renner). (I wrote about this film here and here.)


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Jenna Ortega
Up 38 this week
Jenna Marie Ortega was born on September 27, 2002, in Coachella Valley, California. Jenna began acting at the age of nine and has portrayed the role of Harley, a creative engineering prodigy navigating life as the middle child in a family of seven children, in "Stuck in the Middle," a Disney Channel series told from Harley's perspective. Ortega is ... See full bio »
Born:in Coachella Valley, California, USA
More at IMDbPro » Contact Info: View agent, publicist, legal on IMDbPro


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Medi Connect India offers medical tourism services in India and connects to patient globally in helping them plan and research their medical travel in India. Medi Connect India is a division of Indian Holiday Private Limited ®, winners of 2 consecutive National Tourism Award and recognized by Ministry of Tourism, Government of India.
Medi Connect India leverages 25 years of domain experience in travel and tourism industry to facilitate medical travel in India. A dedicated team of skilled professionals and association with doctors, consultants and trusted names in healthcare industry enable Medi Connect India to offer best available and personalized consultancy and arrangement of affordable medical treatments in India with a human touch.
As the medical division of Indian Holiday Pvt. Ltd., Medi Connect India is associated with some of the trusted travel bodies like IATO and ASTA along with Indian Medical Travel Association (IMTA) which brings together best providers in Indian healthcare industry.
Ms. Shalini Sharma (+91 9717766080)
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|A little purple daikon for the chopping!
Houtou Udon - A steamy bowl of noodle goodness if ever there was one. Kawaguchiko has made it their famous dish, but there's no reason not to whip up your own version.
Goma ai Shungiku - Serve these greens up hot or cold for a brilliantly colored side dish that is tasty and healthy to boot. It's worth mentioning that this can also be made with komatsuna, too. Simply shorten the cooking time slightly and the rest is all the same.
Kimchi - There is still a bounty of haksai (Chinese cabbage), winter greens, kabu, and daikon to be had, and what better way to make use of all that than a batch of kimchi. Chop and mix and then set it somewhere to stew away for later days.
C-Cafe's Kabu and Grapefruit Salad - A wonderful way to mix two seasonal favorites if ever there was one, this salad is the bomb-diggity. Easy on the eyes and on the taste buds, this little salad will fast become a seasonal favorite.
Nanohana no Kurashie - It's a tad bit early for this one, but it's worth keeping tab on this terrific recipe for when these great greens do begin to appear.


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The day
September 9th, 1996 was the worst day of my life. On that day, at 9:00 a.m., my wife Sheri and I found out that one of the twins whom Sheri was carrying had died. Over the course of the pregnancy, we had identified and named each twin, so we knew that it was Marissa who was gone. Rachel was still alive and doing well.
The twins were monoamniotic, which means that they were literally within the same amniotic sac and could touch each other. We did not know why Marissa had died, but we suspected a cord accident. Since we were at 34 weeks, we deemed it safe to deliver Rachel. We scheduled an emergency C-section and at 12:12 p.m. Rachel entered the world. Marissa was delivered stillborn at 12:13 p.m.
I wish it could have been a happier day for Sheri and myself and for Rachel. After all, we had just delivered our daughter. But Marissa's death had made it a black day for all of us. Try as I might, I could only barely feel the joy of Rachel's birth, so consumed was I by Marissa's death…
Prior to the discovery
Our first child, Brian, was born November 22, 1994. I wanted three children and Sheri only two. We decided to have a second child and put off the decision for a third until later. We wanted the children to be close in age, so we tried to get pregnant right after the start of the new year in 1996. As with Brian, we got lucky and conceived during our first month. Unlike with Brian, Sheri's pregnancy with the second child was very difficult – she was extremely nauseous and felt weak and tired. I figured this meant we were going to have a girl. The day after Mother's Day, we had our first sonogram at the OB's. Within a few seconds, the sonogram operator said, "Guess what, Sheri? There's two!". Well, the mystery of the rough pregnancy was solved.
I was ecstatic over the news. We had identical girls growing within Sheri. We called virtually everyone we knew to let them know. We then saw the OB. The sonogram operator suspected the twins were monoamniotic, and our OB told us that we probably had monoamniotic twins. Only 1 in 25,000 pregnancies result in this type of twinning, so I felt rather special. The OB said that monoamniotic twins were at risk for accidents and that we should pray that later sonograms showed an amnion. I didn't quite grasp the relevance of his observation. Both twins were doing well and I had always led a sort of "charmed" existence with no real disasters ever befalling me. I figured that we would sail through the pregnancy and be blessed with beautiful twin girls. The fact that they were monoamniotic just made them even more special.
At the 27th week, we started seeing a high-risk pregnancy specialist. Every Monday we would go in and Sheri would have a non-stress test (NST), to measure the twins' heart rates over time, and a biophysical Profile (BPP), to gain a overall picture of how well the twins were doing. The BPP is essential a detailed sonogram that measures the overall size of the fetuses, the amount of movement, whether there is breathing or not, etc. The first BPP showed that one twin was head down and virtually in position for birth, with her head wedged in near the cervix. The other twin was "floating" above her with her head near the first twin's chest and her legs entangled with the first twin's legs. We had already decided on names and that the first twin delivered would be Rachel, so the "in position" twin became Rachel Ilana and the "floater" became Marissa Leigh.
The greatest risk with monoamniotic twins is that the cords will become entangled. Cord accidents are always a possibility within any twin pregnancy, but it especially risky within a monoamniotic pregnancy because the cords are literally within the same sac and can easily braid together. Although there is very little literature on monoamniotic pregnancies, the general consensus is that the risk of cord accidents is 50% or above until the 30th week. At that point, the fetuses are presumed to be less able to twist around each other and the risk drops to that of a normal twin pregnancy.
After we passed the 30th week, I felt a real sense of relief. It was obvious that my "charmed" existence was holding true and that our girls would make it to term. After all, we had made it through the high risk period. Each week, the BPP and NST showed the twins were doing great. Both were growing fine, both were showing developmental breathing patterns, etc. Both our OB and our high-risk specialist told us how well this pregnancy was going and that we were very fortunate.
We went in on Monday, September 9th with the expectation that we'd get another "clean bill of health" on the twins. We started with the BPP (we usually had the NST first, but the nurse who ran the NST was still doing rounds with the high-risk doctor). Our sonogram operator scanned Rachel first and she got perfect scores. She then scanned Marissa. Her first series of measurements were on the length of bones to ensure proper growth. In order to ensure she was scanning Marissa's legs, she had to start at her head and trace her body to the legs. Each of the leg measurements was coming up too small, so she repeated the measurements several times. Since we had done this so many times, I had become adept at reading the sonogram screen. Each time she traced Marissa's body, I had trouble locating her heart. After the fourth or fifth time, I asked her why I wasn't seeing the heart. She did a quick chest scan and then, obviously distressed, excused herself. My world sank.
I knew that something was very wrong, and f felt certain that Marissa was gone. I held Sheri's hand and she asked me what was wrong. I told her that I thought Marissa was gone and that we both needed to be strong. We started to cry and we held each other. In minutes, the doctor and the other nurse came in. The doctor did a fast scan and confirmed our fears: Marissa had died, probably a few days earlier.
I was devastated. My world was crashing around me. Sheri was crying, as were the sonogram operator and the nurse. But I suddenly snapped out of grief mode and into "Daddy" mode. I had to make sure Sheri and Rachel made it through the rest of this ordeal. I became very serious and asked the doctor for his recommendation. He recommended that we C-section Rachel out to ensure that whatever had killed Marissa didn't kill Rachel, as well. As he went to call our regular OB, we went to the NST room and hooked Sheri to the monitor so that she could hear Rachel's heartbeat and be sure she was OK.
Sheri was near hysterical, but I felt I had to be her "rock". So I tried to talk her through her fear and crying. I tried to help her Lamaze breathe to calm her down. I had to be strong for her and for Rachel. When she had calmed down somewhat, I left her for a few moments to call our parents and our nanny (who was watching Brian) to let them know we were going to the hospital and to let them know what had happened. Actually telling someone else about Marissa's death suddenly made it very real, and I started crying and shaking all over again. But I calmed myself down, made a few more calls to take care of urgent business concerns, and got Sheri ready to go over to the hospital.
I drove us (Sheri, myself, and the nurse from the high-risk doctor's office) over to the hospital and got us checked into a Labor and Delivery Room (LDR). Our OB had been contacted and one of his partners was on call and would perform the C-section. We met with the LDR nurse and the OB and determined that Sheri was 4 cm. dilated and that we could try to go vaginally if we wanted. We decided to go with the C-section as it presented the least risk. Sheri was given an epidural and I spoke soothingly to her throughout the whole procedure. The LDR seemed like a whirlwind of activity and I had to sign forms, assess recommendations, help keep Sheri calm, etc. While waiting for the operating room to become available, I called other friends and family to let them know what had happened. Then, suddenly, the LDR nurse was telling me to put on my scrubs while they wheeled Sheri away. When I was called into the operating room, they had already made the first incisions into Sheri's abdomen. I held Sheri's hand and told her what was going on. Sheri and I still wanted to document this experience, so I occasionally stood up to take pictures. Within minutes, the OB announced that he was ready to deliver Rachel. At 12:12 p.m., she entered the world and started crying. It was the most beautiful sound in the world – she was OK, she was alive. I took more pictures and cried some more. And then the OB took Marissa from Sheri's body. She was limp and silent and they placed her in a bassinet. I took several pictures of her and touched her and told her that I loved her. I then bounced between Sheri, Rachel, and Marissa as the OB stitched Sheri's incision and the nurses tended to Rachel.
Rachel then had to go to the NICU for monitoring. Sheri and I decided I should go with Rachel, so I followed the nurses to the NICU. They hooked Rachel up to various monitors and gave her oxygen. But she was doing very well (she ended up only spending about 4 hours in the NICU), so I asked the NICU staff to take special care of her and went back to Sheri, who had been moved back to the LDR.
In the LDR, the nurses told us about the grieving process, about how the hospital encouraged us to visit with the stillborn twin, and how we had to decide about autopsy and the disposition of the body. They gave us a wreath of intertwined twigs with a white ribbon and told me to put it on our door in the post-partum room; this would let the members of the maternity staff know that we had experienced a loss and that they should treat us with special sensitivity. Again, as I was in "Daddy" mode, I took it all in so that I could discuss it with Sheri when she was prepared to talk about it. About an hour later, they moved us to our post-partum room.
As they moved us to the post-partum room, I noticed that it was pouring outside, literally raining down in buckets. No rain or storms had been forecast for the day (I'm a Weather Channel fan and had checked the forecast). It was so very strange. It was almost as if God was weeping for our loss…
After delivery and through the funeral
Sheri and I had many decisions to make after we had been settled into our post-partum room. Did we want an autopsy? Should we have a funeral for Marissa? Did we want to view Marissa's body? Should we take First-Foto's of Marissa at all? If so, should they be with Rachel or alone? When should Brian come and visit? Should I room in or go home to be with Brian?
Emotionally, we were numb. We wanted so much to be happy for Rachel's safe arrival, but we were mostly sad for Marissa's loss. I was in "do" mode, taking care of hospital administrivia, answering the phone, planning out the next few hours. In a strange way, it was almost merciful for me to have Rachel in the NICU for a few hours, since it gave me time to sort things out without the distractions of a newborn. But we barely seemed to have time for each other, not that either of us had anything left to give. I wanted to comfort Sheri more, but ended up handling everything but her emotional needs.
We decided very quickly to not have an autopsy, since it was almost guaranteed that it would not reveal any new information for us. We were also in complete agreement that we wanted a funeral for Marissa and that we wanted to spend some time with her. The nurse brought her to us during the afternoon, We had requested that she be dressed in her First-Foto outfit, so she came to us swaddled in pink with little teddy bears. Hospital rules precluded them from washing her body, so she still had much of the vernix on her. We held her and cried and said goodbyes and words of love to her. She was cold and silent; at times, bodily fluids would leak from her nose or mouth. I'll never forget how limp she was. Even a sleeping baby has some muscle tone and resists falling: Marissa had none. She was like five pounds of cold meat in my hands. It was a disturbing sensation – babies ought not to die and should never feel like that. However, despite the awkwardness and the morbidness of holding and caressing our dead twin, I felt it was necessary and in a small way cleansing. She was real; she had been here; she was dead – I had seen it with my own eyes and felt it with my own hands.
The nurse told us that the hospital took First-Foto's of stillborns for records and as a courtesy to parents. We were not obligated to view, take, or even pay for them, but they were there if we wanted them. We decided to have each twin photographed separately, so they took Marissa away when we were finished saying goodbye to have her pictures taken.
They brought Rachel to us around 6:00 p.m. that evening. We were anxious to see her and didn't understand the delays in bringing her from the NICU. Was everything all right? Yes, they assured us, these were just normal hospital delays. When she did arrive, we realized that nothing new had developed. She was so small and fragile. She had very little body fat and her skin fit loosely on her arms and legs. But she was beautiful and alive and here.
Our rabbi came to our hospital room that night (we had called the temple to inform them of our new arrival and loss). He was incredibly comforting and helped us to understand what our options were and how the mechanics of setting up a funeral were done. In a strict interpretation of Judaism, a stillborn is not recognized as a "real" person, so no funeral is performed; however, as reform Jews, we recognize that a stillbirth is a special loss to the parents and that marking such a loss with ritual is a kindness. Our rabbi said he would perform the funeral and that we could wait until Sheri and Rachel were out of the hospital and able to attend. He also helped us to understand the many arrangements that had to be made with funeral homes, cemeteries, etc.
The next two days became a blur of activity. I had to coordinate the funeral home, burial arrangements, cemetery plots and markers, and the funeral itself. I was relieved to see the business-like way the funeral home and cemetery made their arrangements; it was only when I paused to think of why I was doing this that it got sorrowful. Perhaps the most difficult part was delivering to the funeral home the things we wanted buried with Marissa: the dress and other clothes she was to have gone home in; a blanket knitted by my mother with Marissa's name on it; a teddy bear that Sheri's mother had meant to present to Marissa; and a picture of Sheri, Brian, Rachel, and myself with a note written from us on the back.
In addition many family members were starting to arrive for the funeral. Although I had much to do and appreciated the help that they provided, it was sometimes difficult to deal with them and their needs – they meant well, of course, but it was difficult for me to see past my own needs and any small request on their part seemed overly burdensome.
We had much help with Brian during those few days from Brian's nanny and from our best friends in the neighborhood. Both live just a few doors down from us and were able to make sure that his needs were met each day. I tried to get away as much as possible to be with him and reassure him but there was just so much to do. I spent the night before Sheri came home at home with Brian, which allowed me to catch up on several of the things needing attention at home and at work and to spend some quality time with Brian.
Whatever other time I had, I spent at the hospital, which was really my home base. I tried to "be there" for Sheri, but there were so many things going on and arrangements to be made that I feel that I might have neglected her needs during that time. She told me later on that she was so awash in her own emotions and in caring for Rachel that she didn't feel that I was neglecting her, but I'll always wonder if I should have tried to juggle things differently to be more available for her.
While at the hospital, I tried to get to know Rachel. It seems that mothers have an instant attachment to their babies, while fathers have to grow into it. That's not to say I had no feelings at all for her; I felt the joy of knowing I had a new child and the feelings of love that go with that. But I didn't know her personality the way Sheri did (from the inside out, so to speak) and still needed to bond with her. I knew in time I would love her in a way totally different from the way I was feeling now and different from how I loved Sheri or Brian. But for now, I needed to just hold her and change her and try to learn her ways. But it was difficult, since so many conflicting emotions surrounded her birth. She was so small and frail and skinny…Would she survive? Did she know her twin sister was dead? Could I see her as an individual and not part of a "broken set"? Could I celebrate her life without overshadowing it with Marissa's death?
We left the hospital on Thursday morning. Although Rachel had lost weight and was down to 4 lbs. 10 oz., the doctors and nurses felt that she and Sheri were doing fine and could go home. I felt heartsick for Sheri because it was very difficult for her to go home with "only one" and I was scared about what the next few days and weeks would hold. Yet I was happy that Rachel was doing so well as to be able to go home on a normal timetable as other babies did. When we got home, we told all of our relatives that they needed to stay away from us for several hours so that we could settle in and introduce Rachel to the house. However, the phone never stopped ringing, floral deliveries kept coming to the door, and we never really got the quiet time together that we had hoped for. The whirlwind of activity that had started on Tuesday just never wound down…
We had the funeral on Friday morning. All of the relatives that had flown in from out of town gathered at our home and we ran a "car caravan" to the cemetery. There, we were met by friends and coworkers. I felt oddly at ease, greeting family members and friends. Unbeknownst to me, Sheri was terribly upset, but I was oblivious and, again, didn't tend to her needs. When the rabbi arrived, we drove down to the gravesite and started the funeral.
It was only then that the enormity of the situation hit me. I was burying my daughter, something that I had never even imagined could have happened to me. It seemed so strange for Sheri and me to be the focus of such an event. I had gone to other funerals to honor those who had passed and to comfort the survivors; I never thought people would be doing this for me. Suddenly, there was the casket and flowers before me, my wife and new daughter on one side being comforted by her parents, my son and my parents on the other. Brian had no conception of what was going on and I and my parents had to tend to him, but he was great and pretty much just sat in his seat. I barely remember any of the ceremony. My mind was going in a million different directions and I kept trying to focus on Marissa and the funeral but it was so hard. As they lowered her casket into the ground, the reality of her death really came home to me and I started sobbing. My daughter, our daughter, Rachel's twin, Brian's sister, our being parents of twins, our charmed existence, they were all gone…
We left the cemetery and drove home. Our neighbors had come into our house and prepared a large buffet for us and our friends and relatives. Throughout the entire experience of Rachel and Marissa's birth and Marissa's funeral, we were buoyed up by the incredible support and comfort provided by our neighbors, friends, family, co-workers, temple, and medical staff. We were amazed by the many people whose lives we had touched and were now coming to our aid. Growing up, I had always been close to God, but had soured on religion in college and had abandoned faith. While this experience didn't bring me any closer to a God that could give us twins and then take one of them away, it brought me incredibly closer to my temple and community. God, fate, whatever, may be cruel, but people are basically good and the distance they will go to help one another is truly inspiring.
After the funeral
We started the de-twinning process the weekend after the funeral. We didn't feel that we had to erase Marissa from our lives or pretend that she didn't exist; it was just that we had prepared the house for two newborns and now only needed the equipment for one. The most difficult aspect for me was the disassembly of the second crib. We had searched all over to find a second crib to match the one we had purchased for Brian when he was a newborn. Unable to find it, we ended up special ordering it from the manufacturer. We set it up in our bedroom so that the twins could be together and Sheri could reach them easily for breast feeding, etc. Later on, we'd move the crib into the nursery with the first one and they each would have their own matching cribs. Now, the crib was too large a space for just one, and we decided to return the crib and just use a bassinet next to the bed. I decided I wanted to do this task alone so that I could be alone with my thoughts. It was as if by taking the crib apart by myself, I would have a chance to talk to Marissa all by myself, without anyone else distracting me. It was extremely emotional but very cleansing. When it was done, I felt that I had crossed some kind of threshold. Strangely, after that, my level of sadness seemed to diminish and the other tasks of de-twinning seemed less hard.
We worked together to separate all of the pairs of items and decide which ones to return, which ones to donate to our Twins Club, and which ones to keep. We created memory boxes for both girls, but put most of the twin-related items (such as "It's Twins!" T-shirts, etc.) in Marissa's box. We filled out baby books for each girl. We felt that we should not slight Marissa by ignoring the items for her that we processed for Rachel. For me, at least, this helped me to "bond" with my lost daughter and give her some life to me. Soon, most of the twin aspects of our house were gone. Again, we don't deny the twinness of Rachel or Marissa, nor do we deny what happened. It just seemed to make sense not to enshrine the things that made our house a twin house and to only keep the things that made sense for a single newborn.
Strangely, during this time, I felt that I grew closer to Marissa, even though I knew her to be dead. I've never believed in an afterlife or spirits, but it was comforting to me to imagine that Marissa was aware of our actions and was watching over Rachel. I found myself having small "conversations" with her, asking her to help relieve Rachel's pain in separating from her sister or telling her how sorry I was that she didn't survive. I don't mean this to imply that I spoke actually to her or that I heard voices; it was more just a mental exercise, pretending that maybe she could hear me. But it was comforting nonetheless.
In the months that followed, I found that I grieved very little. I sometimes wondered if I was some kind of monster for not grieving more. Sheri and others told me that we each grieve in our own way and that we each are at different "levels" at different times; just because Sheri seemed to be feeling one way didn't mean that I had to be feeling the same. But, to this day, it still concerns me that I never seem to have had a "clothes-ripping" total breakdown; I don't know why but it seems that such a total grief-stricken experience is necessary.
Two weeks after Rachel and Marissa were delivered, I was back working. I run my own company and couldn't let it get away from me. Even during the few days before the funeral, I had to handle a few customer situations. I think this return to work and the daily routine helped me to get my feet back on the ground; but, at the same time, I think it inhibited my grief work and placed it on a back burner. In addition, having the responsibilities of raising an almost two-year-old and a newborn certainly inhibited serious introspection and grief work; there just wasn't the time.
However, when my thoughts turned to Marissa, I found that I would visit the cemetery and gaze at her plot and (later) marker. I would continue to have small conversations with her and would feel better. Spending time with her at the cemetery tended to make me feel more connected to her, as if I was still giving my little girl the attention she deserves.
Four months later
Now it is four months later and much has changed.
Rachel is colicky (pretty much since the end of the first month) and demands much attention. We've started feeding her baby foods, which is helping a lot, but it is still often difficult. But she is starting to respond to us, giving us great smiles and cooing. For me as a father, this is the time that I really begin to see her as a person and have really started to enjoy being with her. Her weight, after a slow start, is now up to close to 11 lbs. and she is "on the growth curves". She had had several childhood diseases (pink eye, ear infections, etc.) but is completely healthy now. Her prematurity no longer seems to be a factor and she is as "normal" a baby as you would expect from a singleton birth.
We've done a lot of reading about twin loss. The Center for Loss In Multiple Birth (CLIMB) has been of tremendous support. I've gained a real understanding for the process of grieving and believe I'm somewhat prepared for the trials and tribulations of raising a twinless twin. We've starting attending a local support group called Share, which specializes in loss of a child around birth. Speaking with other bereaved parents has helped and is of great comfort.
Sheri is back to work and I am totally immersed in the day-to-day operation of my company. The kids are healthy and happy. We seem to have the perfect family of four – mommy, daddy, a boy, and a girl. But few who see us know that our perfect family was meant to have five… The grief, for me, comes only every now and then, especially during special times (holidays and the like) and when we see another couple with twins. I still make trips to the cemetery on occasion, and they still cheer me up when I am down, but I don't feel as compelled to go as much as I used to.
I miss my daughter and grieve for the twinness that she and Rachel would have shared. But the reality is that she is gone. For now, the pain seems to have eased and life has assumed a new form of normalcy and routine. But every now and then, as I hold Rachel, I try to imagine another just like her in my arms and wonder about what could have been…
Grieving and Daddies
As a father, grieving for a stillborn twin has been a strange experience. So much of the grief process and community response seems geared to the mother.
Most support groups are only for the mothers; where couples are encouraged, most report that very few fathers attend. I've been unable to find a support group only for fathers. I've been lucky in the fact that I've found a support group that does have participating fathers, but, so far, it has been difficult to get my needs met since the discussion still seems more focused on the mothers' needs.
Most articles treat only the mother's grief and depression and relegate the father to a support role. Other articles simply say that fathers grieve, too. The few articles that have dealt with fathers' grief have been "dead on" in describing the feelings that I am experiencing, but they are few and far between.
Most of the community doesn't seem to understand how to deal with a grieving father. Most people ask how my wife is doing. Since I did not carry the babies, and since I do not seem to be outwardly grieving, most assume that I must be fine and that I am only concerned with ensuring that my wife is dealing with it well. Part of it, I'm sure, is due to society's image of the man as the strong support in the family, taking care of the physical and economic needs of the family and letting the woman handle the emotional and child rearing aspects. Part of it is also that most people are uncomfortable around grief in general; dealing with a man's emotions is even more difficult. Even in today's "sensitive" culture, a truly sensitive man is still considered somewhat wimpy and less of a man. The sensitive man should still be tough and gritty and only sensitive when dealing with a woman – a Clint Eastwood who can understand the needs of a woman and can open up when she wants to talk. Thus, it is hard for a man to ask another man how he is feeling emotionally, especially where grieving is concerned. Couple this with the fact that most women don't ask about a man's emotions because discussing such things can breed sexual undercurrents, and you get a very lonely environment for a grieving father.
Much of my grieving has come from the fact that I've lost the ability to "always make things right" in my family. I used to be able to promise that everything would be OK– and I could always ensure that it really would be OK. But Marissa's death is something that I cannot fix. And when I tell Sheri that nothing bad will happen in a difficult situation, she no longer believes me. That loss of trust and power is a terrible blow to a father.
Another difficult aspect of the grieving process is that I seem to be grieving for everything except Marissa. I don't mean this as coldly as it sounds; I truly do grieve for my daughter. But I did not carry her nor did I get a chance to know her that way that Sheri did. The blow to me was much more conceptual in nature than physical or real. The carrying of twins was a reality for my wife; for me, it was a happy concept, demonstrated in ultrasounds and OB visits and my wife's growing belly. But I couldn't really feel it or experience it. In the same way that it takes fathers longer to bond with their newborns that it does for mothers, it has taken longer for me to grieve for Marissa as loss of a child than it has for Sheri. When Marissa died, only my concept of her died, as least initially. What I lost most was the fantasy of life with twins. When Marissa died, I saw the death of my being a parent of twins, of me having three children instead of two. I saw the end of a happy pregnancy and the beginning of a time of turmoil in my life, family, and marriage. I saw the difficulty in raising a twinless twin, in dealing with a wife who had lost a child. I saw the end of the celebrity of being a parent of twins and the end of my ability to always make things turn out right. All of these conflicting feelings of loss make it harder to grieve for the loss of a child in and of itself.
It is hard to work through all of this with my wife because of two things. On the one hand, she is grieving, as well, and has little left to support me (the reverse is also true). On the other hand, we are both almost overwhelmed with the day-to-day tasks of raising two children, one of whom is a newborn, and juggling our business and home lives. This leaves precious little time and energy to discuss such weighty issues as grief. That is not to say that we don't try, but it is very hard. We feel that we give as much attention as we can to the subject and to each other within the limits of our lives.
Much of this makes me feel guilty. In one sense, I'm not treated as if I am grieving as much as my wife. And, most of the time, I don't feel as if I am grieving enough. In another sense, I seem to be grieving for the wrong things. And lastly, I have very few support outlets to discuss my grief. I'm assured by those who do support me, including my wife, that these feelings are normal and that I shouldn't feel guilty, but I do nonetheless.
Thus it is strange to be a daddy who is grieving. It is such an odd mixture of societal stereotypes, personal grief, and misplaced guilt. I sometimes feel all mixed up with no outlets to talk it out. Yet other times, I hardly feel as if I am grieving at all.
It would be helpful to talk with other fathers in similar situations, but I know how difficult it is for one man to speak with another about such intensely personal feelings. I don't know if a fathers-only support group could ever achieve a large enough population to be viable. It would be very valuable if other fathers were to write their stories or discuss their feelings within a forum such as CLIMB. At least then, other fathers could benefit from the experiences and analyses of those who have gone before them.


text:
Use waxing
Waxing does not solve the fundamental problems of unwanted vegetation on the body, 2-3 weeks damaged during the pulling of hair follicles are completely restored and deleted hairs start to grow again.
So after depilation biological control cosmetologists recommend to lubricate the skin with special compounds inhibiting hair growth.
Use waxing hair re can be no earlier than 3 days, by which time the skin will be able to fully recover from the irritation produced in the previous session depilation.
After hair removal skin for March 2 days must also be protected from sunlight special sunscreen.. . . . . . Read more -->
After that, relax
Zazhmurte eyes tightly closed and leave them for 6 seconds.
After that, relax and open your eyes.
Against sagging lower eyelids.
Paw 4 fingers of the left and right hand put on the skin under the eyes and firmly onto the edge of the zygomatic bone.
Zazhmurte eyes, a little at first, then more and so hold for 6 seconds.
Thereafter fingertips sharply clean and open your eyes.
Complex exercise number 6 This gymnastics is based on the principle of resistance of certain muscle groups to external pressure.. . . . . . Read more -->
Repeat the exercise
Tension lasts two seconds, relaxing - one second.
The number of repetitions with the triples.
The third phase After ten weeks slowed the pace and intensity of exercise loosen.
Voltage lasts for five seconds, relax - for three seconds.
Repeat the exercise five times in a row three times a week.
1 Squirrel Exercise 2: "dolphin" This complements the previous exercise, helps to eliminate double chin and creates a beautiful, harmonious profile.
The first phase Support the chin with the back of his hand (see 1, try to open your mouth, overcoming the resistance of the palm.. . . . . . Read more -->
This book
So an attempt was made to develop a special exercises for rehabilitation and renovation premature aging of the face and neck.
This book is written for a wide audience : both specialists and the general reader , for both women and men .
I will be grateful to all those who are interested in the subject of this work , who will share their experiences , results or just express criticisms.
Let's break WHY wrinkles ? Over time due to external and internal factors human body ages .
This is inevitable, as the natural life time of each species of living organisms genetically caused .. . . . . . Read more -->
The skin becomes
The skin becomes flabby , sagging , changing its color, lines and wrinkles appear .
Often results in the entire stagnant areas on the face with a very weak blood circulation , reduced function of the sebaceous and sweat glands.
Skin in such areas pale, grayish-yellow tint and blushes even at a sufficiently strong external stimulation .
All these unpleasant consequences inactivity in the face and neck can be avoided if the optimum level of motor activity in the muscles of the head zone .. . . . . . Read more -->


text:
Specifically, Sen. Bill Nelson, Charlie Crist, Kendrick Meek and Republican fundraiser-slash-rodeo enthusiast Ron Bergeron. They were joined by a national political dignitary, Interior Secretary Ken Salazar. They all hopped on airboats -- Bergeron drove one of them, man's man that he is -- and went traipsing around the Great Swamp looking for pythons to exterminate. Obviously, this is the opening scene of the next reptilian horror flick, but we'll get to that. First, let's ask National Geographic whether our Florida politicians should really be snake-hunting.
To reiterate, it says of pythons that they're huge, highly aggressive and that, "To capture one you need a team of experienced snake-catchers."
Oops! But the lack of it is what makes this a great movie. You've got a retired astronaut who may be able to draw upon previous encounters with aliens, which our too-big-to-be-a-python may prove to be. You've got a Republican - Democrat feud between Crist and Meek, setting up a scene in which one of them is in mortal snake danger and can only be saved by the other. You've got the tough-as-nails rancher in Bergeron who may by movie's end earn a grudging respect for the city slickers who wear loafers on his airboat. And Salazar... um... Don't know much about him, so let's just feed him to the serpent early in the film, shall we?
Also, I just got a call from David Hasselhoff's agent. He says his client deserves to play the ranger who cautions this group not to dare mess with the Everglades. And though his advice is ignored, the Hoff will swoop in to play hero, as he does in the clip after the jump, from Anaconda 3: The Offspring.


text:
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ChurnZero's real-time SaaS platform aims to help subscription businesses prevent customer churn. The platform integrates tightly with an organization's CRM system and their application or service. In doing so, ChurnZero (1) allows the business to understand how their customers use their product, (2) assesses customer health and likelihood to renew, and (3) gives the business the means to automate and personalize the customer experience through timely and relevant touchpoints, including in-app content. The vendor says ChurnZero customers see ROI in terms of more productive and better informed customer success managers who can provide their customers with better just-in-time service from the automated playbooks. Schedule your live demo here.
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Words and pictures from the author of And the Crows Took Their Eyes as well as the Elizabeth Goodweather Appalachian Mysteries . . .
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Greens . . .
Below, clumps of water cress in the branch under the willow rejoice in the flowing water. Watercress was first planted there by some tenants a good fifteen years ago and it has seeded and spread with a will. I have sighted it growing happily in the branch at least a mile down the road.
The pale new yellow-greens are perhaps my favorite -- lacy against the sky and feathery against the solidness of the dark tree trunks. But would that pale green be half so charming without the deep green of the evergreens as background?
11 comments:
- Carol Murdock said...
That rain does green things up!
I got your Rose in the car. See you in Flat Rock!!
- May 7, 2009 at 8:28 AM
- Vicki Lane said...
Safe journey, Carol!
- May 7, 2009 at 9:13 AM
- Tess Kincaid said...
Love all that lush emerald green! Up here, too. We've had sooooo much rain.
- May 7, 2009 at 11:54 AM
Wish you could send a little of that rain down here to Florida. Yard looks like hay....
Pat D.
- May 7, 2009 at 12:07 PM
- Vicki Lane said...
Willow - I've just ordered some waterproof walking shoes as my old ones proved sadly inadequate yesterday when we were rounding up some runaway cows! Too wet to mow and the grass is getting higher by the minute!
Pat -- I wish I could will some rain your way -- maybe that pattern of afternoon thunderstorms will kick in for you all pretty soon.
- May 7, 2009 at 12:51 PM
- Reader Wil said...
How wonderful that you and Carol will meet! Everything looks so green in your surroundings, and I must admit that it is beautiful. We had a lot of rain too! Thanks for your visit!
- May 7, 2009 at 2:44 PM
- Vicki Lane said...
Thanks for stopping by, Reader Wil. I wish that I could someday meet all my blog friends in person.
- May 7, 2009 at 3:14 PM
- Victoria said...
I spoke with my friend who lives in Kentucky and she said they were having gentle rains, too. Rain is so much better for all vegetation than water from hoses. Now if only we here in California could get some badly needed rain!
- May 7, 2009 at 11:50 PM
- vicki archer said...
The first image is fab Vicki, xv.
- May 8, 2009 at 5:31 AM
- Eleanor said...
Gorgeous greens with the greyish trunks of those trees. I immediately thought of a quilt in soft greens. I shared the content of your book: Community quilts, with our little 'bee' last Saturday. But I told the girls I am not ready to lend the book yet.
We also had a discussion about the correct pronunciation of Appalachians! Of course, here in South Africa we have so called 'British'accents!
- May 8, 2009 at 5:44 AM
- Vicki Lane said...
Victoria -- As I told Pat D., I wish I could send some of the rain your way. We seem to be in some sort of holding pattern where it keeps looping around.
Ha, my husband just called me to come look at the sky -- the clouds are doing weird swirling things - probably part of that looping effect.
Vicki A. -- I was really pleased with that shot. I'm no photographer but a digital camera, suited to the meanest intelligence, is very helpful.
Eleanor -- I love to think of your community in SA taking a look at our community here in the Appalachians. A lot of folks -- generally those not from this area -- pronounce it with the third A long
(App (as in apple) uh - LAY - shun.
But the more approved pronunciation would be App - uh - LATCH - un. The word is of Cherokee Indian origin and many of their place names contain this LATCH syllable.
Of, course, I have a feeling that you all in SA don't pronounce LATCH -- or LAY or even APPLE -- in the same way we do.
I adore the accents of different places!
- May 8, 2009 at 9:00 AM


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Cinco de Mayo is coming up and it's the perfect excuse to mail an adorable pinata to your friends. Because we're all looking for reasons to make these cute little guys and send them to each other, right?
That's what I thought when I saw Aracely from Whack Piñatas' adorable llamas on Pinterest and had to figure out how to turn it into a mini version. But beyond stuffing these mini pinatas with spicy Mexican candy, I decided to turn them into party invitations! When a fluffy white llama arrives in your mailbox bearing an invitation, you know you want to go to that party. The only thing better would be an actual Peruvian messenger aboard a real-life llama showing up at your door. That would be extra surprising.
Did you see how the invitation just slides out of the side of the pinata when you pull the string?? I like to think the string looks like a lead rope for the llama. I am happy to report that these work beautifully in the mail. I sent several last week and everyone figured out how to pull the invitation out without any instructions.
Okey dokey, let's get started. You will need:
- your party invitations, which should not be taller than 4″
- baker's twine
- gift tags
- cardstock, posterboard, or lightweight cardboard (an empty cereal box works great!)
- llama pinata template!! (click to print)
- scissors
- tape
- tissue paper
- hot glue gun
- Make your invitation festive! Cut a few rounded corners of tissue paper, fringe the edges, and glue them onto the invitation. Then tape a bit of baker's twine to the back of the invitation, so that it can be pulled out of the pinata later. Tie the baker's twine to a little tag and write PULL on it, so people know they should pull it!
2. Cut out your llama template. *note: I made my llamas white, so I tried to keep the white side of my posterboard facing outwards, so that the cereal box print wouldn't show through the white tissue paper. That's why the template has two llama shapes–if you cut them both out, the right side will be facing outwards on the front and back, like a fabric pattern.
3. Also cut a long strip of posterboard that measures 1 and 1/2″ by 27″. I couldn't get a 27″ long strip out of my cereal box, so I cut two strips (1 1/2″ x 18″ and 1 1/2 X 9″). You just need enough length to go around the llama shapes, so make as many strips as you need to add up to 27″ total. Keep all of them at 1 1/2″ wide.
4. Beginning with just one llama cutout, tape the strip around the edge of the entire shape. You can see a video of me doing this on a different mini pinata. If you have more than one strip, just keep adding until the entire shape now has a border.
5. Place the other llama cutout on top of the border you just created and tape it in place. *note: I find it helpful to tape the corners first, to keep the shape tight, and then tape the sides to the border strips.
6. Make sure you do not tape the neck closed on this side – leave a gap from under the chin down to the top of the leg. This is where the invitation will be pulled from.
7. Next, insert an invitation into the pinata. You should do this before gluing your fringe, but for the pictures, I glued the leg fringe on early so you can see how the fringe will go around the front legs and then open for the invitation slit. Just roll up the invitation and gently tuck it inside the neck, leaving the gift tag and baker's twine hanging out, so it can be pulled.
8. Using whatever color you like, cut strips of tissue paper and fringe the edges. If you want a fluffier llama, make the strips wider, with deeper, longer fringe cuts. Using a hot glue gun, glue the fringe on the bottom of the feet and around the front legs and around the back legs. Then glue the fringe under the belly.
9. As you glue the fringe on the body, be careful not to glue your invitation slit shut. You can see in the picture the I start a strip at the edge of the slit and glue down across the body, on both sides. Continue to glue from edge to edge, keeping the invitation slit open, until you reach the neck. Then glue fringe around the neck until the entire pinata is covered!
10. Adorn your pinata! Cut some colorful rectangles, fringe the edges, and layer them to make a saddle. Twist a strip of fringe to make tassels to hang from the ears and the lead rope. *note: Can you see in the picture how the rope around the neck doesn't block the invitation from being pulled out? To do this, glue the rope in place on either side of the slit, and then cut the rope so that the invitation can still slide out. You can also draw eyes and a mouth, and glue a bridle around the nose!
Awww, he's so cute! These would also be adorable place cards, am I right?!
Also! If you're not interested in assembling and hot-glue-gunning for your party, you can purchase the original inspiration for this project at Whack Pinatas! Aracely is a wizard pinata master, definitely check out her all her amazing work!


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Archaeologists working on Neolithic digs in Shetland have found the remains of Shetland's native sheep dating back 5000 years. Throughout the early history a dense scrub woodland covered the hinterland of Shetland, which must have made catching small, agile sheep a challenge. As early agriculture developed the coastal areas were cleared for cultivation and grazing sheep, cattle and pigs were kept on the rest.
The sheep are of the northern short-tailed variety, probably, closely related to other primitive types such as the Soay of St. Kilda and the Villsau of Norway. The Shetland breed evolved to cope with its particular environment and has done so ever since.
Kept as hefted flocks grazing the hills and cliffs, their wool must have been critical for clothing. The sails of the Viking galleys, which crossed the oceans exploring new lands, were woven out of wool. While Shetland remained in Norwegian ownership taxes were paid in rolls of wadmel, a woven woollen cloth. Local fishermen working in open boats down the ages knew that woollen clothes kept them warm even when wet.
Nothing of the sheep harvest was wasted with skins being used as sieves, horns as sail couplings, dried inflated intestines as fishing buoys, and of course everything which was edible was consumed.
The dominant wool colour was moorit or brown with the present predominance of white being a determination of modern spinning mills. Many other colour variations were found with each being given a Shetlandic name. These helped identification of individual sheep kept extensively in township grazings, scattalds.
The Shetland crofters, in deciding to have their organic wool
spun, have for the first time in recent history been able to let the
true character of the wool speak for itself. Their Organic yarns are
unadulterated by chemicals and the prejudice of dyeing. Shetland
Organic wool is an ancient fibre with a modern spin.
Shetland sheep examine an organic wool scarf.


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Climate: Different places have different climates. The climate of a place depends on latitude, distance from the sea, direction of the prevailing wind and the relief of the area.
The nearer to the equator one place is then the hotter it is. This is due to the curvature of the earth. At the equator the sun is overhead and shines straight down so the heat is concentrated on a small area and this gets very hot. Towards the poles, the sun shines at an angle so the heat is spread out over a larger area. This decreases the temperature. This diagram shows what happens at the equator: The climate in the Rainforest is called equatorial climate. This is when the weather is hot and wet all year. Rainfall is quite heavy and falls during most afternoons. There are no winters or summers and one day is very similar to the next.
This map shows equatorial climate to be mainly limited to places within 5 degrees north and south of the equator. The two main areas where equatorial climate is found are the huge river basins of the Amazon, South America and Zaire in Africa. A major factor that affects this climate is latitude. The sun is overhead throughout the year and this gives high temperatures and is responsible for the convectional rainfall. There is no prevailing wind and the air is calm, apart from during thunderstorms.
Convectional rainfall is the main type to be found in the rainforests around the world. Convectional rainfall happens (in summer) when the heated ground warms up the air next to it and the warm air rises. This will eventually cause a thunderstorm. Here is a diagram explaining convectional rainfall: This is the climate table for Manaus, Brazil in the Amazonian rainforest: Data:...


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Why I'm Crushing on the New Pope
Holy Father, I have a confession to make. I've got a crush on you.
Okay, so I know that as a rabbi, I'm not the most likely fanboy for the Pope. I mean, I'll say right up front, he's got all kinds of political and theological positions that I just can't get down with. And then there's that little matter of centuries of persecution by the church that we Jews are still just a wee bit sensitive about. No disrespect to my Catholic brothers and sisters, of course. I'm all for interfaith harmony and peace on earth and all that. All I'm saying is that a rabbi is the last person you'd think would be getting all swoony and excited over the head of the Catholic church. But it's true. I just can't help it. I'm starting to fall for this dude!
Now, I must say, I've never felt this way about a pope before. I've only known two other popes, and neither one has really gotten my cheerleader pom-poms thrusting. If I was gonna go all gaga for someone outside my faith, I'd probably have picked that old standby cool religious leader: the Dalai Lama. (I mean, everyone's kind of got a crush on him, right?) But I don't know, there's something about this new guy in Rome that is giving Tibet some competition for my spiritual affections.
Maybe you haven't been following his big debut since he was elected in March, and maybe you're not following him on Twitter (which I am, @Pontifex), so you don't know how super-cool he is. To bring you up to speed, then, I thought I'd give you…
5 Reasons Why I'm Crushing on the New Pope:
1. His Name
One of the first things that a new pope does is choose a another name he will use during his reign. And most of the names they choose are pretty heavy and medieval-sounding, not something a normal person would go by. So the last pope was Benedict XVI – don't see too many non-popes walking around named Benedict, do ya? Well, this pope, right out the gate, announces his new name will be… FRANCIS!!! Awwwww! Francis just sounds like a darling little schoolboy to me, or like my dear aunt who cuts the crust off my sandwiches. Now, I know the name actually has profound spiritual significance to him, as a reference to St. Francis Assisi. But still, I just think it sounds so sweeeeeeeet!!
2. He's All About the Poor
This pope has made it clear that the focus of his tenure will be on alleviating global poverty. And I don't have anything funny to say about that. That's just awesome.
3. He Likes Kissing Feet
I am not making this one up. In fact, he's not even the only pope to do this. Apparently, kissing the feet of the sick and suffering is a classic Catholic spiritual practice, meant to evoke Jesus' humility. Pretty rad. But this pope made some headlines by being the first to publicly kiss a woman's feet. Go, Pope! Women's feet need kissing, too! Way to come up with strangest way to advocate for women's equality in religion that I've ever heard of.
4. He's Friendly to Atheists
This one is getting a lot of attention in the news lately. Pope Francis gave this big talk where he said that everyone is redeemed by the blood of Christ. Okay, so I'm not so into the blood of Christ stuff, but check out what he said right after:
"…all of us, not just Catholics. Everyone! 'Father, the atheists?' Even the atheists. Everyone!"
That's pretty amazing, in this age of vicious squabbling between religious and atheist fundamentalists. And it's pretty radical language for a pope. So much so that the Vatican had to scurry to release a clarification statement that made his remarks quite a bit tamer. But I know you meant it, Francis. You're a peacemaker – and I'm feelin' it!
5. He Wears a Yarmulka
Okay, this one's not really about Pope Francis. All popes wear that little white beanie that looks like a Jewish yarmulka. But since I wear one myself, I'm particularly psyched that my new homey and I have something in common: our divine fashion sense!
So when me and Francis – a rabbi and a priest – walk into a bar, we'll be all styled out in our little hats, ready to party with poor people and atheists… and ladies – watch your feet!
Featured image via


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A group of DAs have published a report critical of marijuana legalization, Nevada marijuana bills are moving, a New York campaign for the establishment of safe drug consumption rooms gets underway, and more.
In New Report, Prosecutors Slam Marijuana Legalization. The National District Attorneys' Association has released a report, Marijuana Policy: The State and Local Prosecutors' Perspective, that criticizes legalization as leading to greater access by children and creating challenges for impaired driving enforcement. The DAs also criticized state-level legalization and decriminalization as "an obstacle to the comprehensive federal framework." The report will be used by the Trump administration to help fashion its marijuana policy.
Massachusetts House Passes Bill Barring Use of Cash Welfare Benefits to Buy Pot. The House on Tuesday passed House Bill 3194, which would bar the use of cash welfare benefits to purchase marijuana. State law already prohibits cash benefits from being used to purchase alcohol, lottery tickets, cigarettes, and pornography. The measure now goes to the Senate.
Nevada Marijuana Bills Advance. In a frenzy of last-minute activity, legislators approved a series of marijuana bills on Tuesday. Senate Bill 375, which advocates for tribes' right to establish marijuana facilities; Senate Bill 344, which establishes packaging standards; Senate Bill 236, which would allow for on-site consumption; and Senate Bill 374, which would allow the use of medical marijuana for opioid addiction, all passed the Senate and head for the Assembly. Meanwhile, the Assembly passed Assembly Bill 259, which would allow courts to seal the records of people charged with possessing an ounce or less. That bill now heads for the Senate.
Medical Marijuana
Florida Medical Marijuana Regulation Bill Wins Committee Vote. The House Health and Human Services Committee on Monday approved House Bill 1397, which aims to regulate the state's voter-approved medical marijuana system. Critics call the House bill too restrictive and are calling on legislators to instead support a rival bill in the Senate.
Drug Policy
Ted Cruz Files Bill to Make El Chapo Pay for the Border Wall. US Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) has filed Senate Bill 939, "to reserve any amounts forfeited to the US government as a result of the criminal prosecution of Joaquin Archivaldo Guzman Loera (commonly known as "El Chapo"), or of other felony convictions involving the transportation of controlled substances into the United States, for security measures along the Southern border, including the completion of a border wall.
Harm Reduction
Safe Shape Tour across New York State Calls for "Safer Consumption Spaces" to Combat Skyrocketing Overdoses. In response to New York State's overdose and opioid epidemic, a coalition of healthcare professionals, public health experts, advocates, and people with a history of drug use are launching a statewide campaign calling for the creation of safer consumption spaces (SCS) supervised injection facilities (SIF) where people can legally consume previously-purchased illicit drugs with supervision from peers and healthcare professionals who help make their use safer and connect them with medical care, drug treatment, and social services. Click on the link for much more information and how to register for events.


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Demystifying Power
The acceptable market rating on power supplies is the Watt. However, this is nothing more than deceptive marketing. You can actually have a 600 Watt power supply that costs $100 that fails within 3 months with a high end rig, only to have a 450 Watt power supply that lasts for 3 years on the same rig. Why does this happen?
This is because no matter how many watts a power supply is rated for, it means NOTHING if the amps are split up too thinly across each rail to support the devices in your box.
In order to understand this principle, there're two key things that you need to know about electricity:
Lemma #1: Voltage can be split across channels and remain the same in an electrical circuit.
So let's say you can have 12 volts on a molex (4 pin) power connector that you would use to power one IDE drive. Let's say that you put in an additional hard drive and a DVD-RW burner. Now each of these two devices needs 12 volts to run. But you only have one available molex coming from your power supply. What do you do? You get a molex splitter. It's nothing more than a female molex with two male molex connectors extended out of it. You connect the female to the one molex coming from the power supply, and then the two males to your hard drive and DVD-RW respectively. Voila, both devices power right up with no problems.
Why does this work?
Because Voltage can be split across two or more electrical pathways and remain the same. Why is this possible? Because voltage is a rating of the potential for electrical discharge. So long as your hard drive and dvd-rw can create a wide enough potential opposite the cathode connection from your power supply for their rated differential, 12 volts will always exist in both devices and they will always work.
The same is NOT true for Amps. Hence:
Lemma #2: Amperes, or current WILL split across an electrical pathway and become reduced.
Remember that Amps is a measure of the rate of electrical flow. Think of a raging river rapid. You'll note that the water runs at relatively the same speed throughout the main body of the river. However, when the river splits up into various off channels, the water speed dies down on each pathway. This is because the total kinetic energy of the running water is split up along each path. If all those paths were to run together again, they would reproduce the same water speed as existed before the river split up.
Electricity behaves in exactly the same way.
Every power supply has an Ampere rating. You can find out the total amps of a power supply by summing all of the amps on each power rail on the power supply.


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WASHINGTON – On Equal Pay Day, President Barack Obama designated a new national monument to honor women's equality while officials all over the District talked pay equity.
The Belmont-Paul Women's Equality National Museum was designated the newest national monument Tuesday. It has been the site for women's equality for over a century.
Academy Award winning actress Patricia Arquette and Rep. Carolyn Maloney, D-N.Y., spoke at the National Press Club for Equal Pay Day.
"Is it we the people? Or is it we the partial people? Or is it we the people who deserve to be paid less?" Arquette asked.
Arquette won an Oscar for best supporting actress for her performance in "Boyhood." She ended her acceptance speech by saying it is time for women to have equal pay.
The Democratic staff of the Joint Economic Committee released a new report this month with data collected from the U.S. Census Bureau. The report shows women working full time, year round, on average earn 79 percent of what a man earns working full time, year round.
Women make up half of the population, and Arquette said this should make lawmakers want to address the issue since they make up the majority of the voting bloc.
"Instead, women have been improperly protected from gender-based economic discrimination in the workplace by our own government and our leaders," she said.
Maloney said she is working to help women know their rights and to get gender equality in the Constitution by pushing for the Equal Rights Amendment. The ERA has been introduced consistently since a ratification effort failed in the early 1980s.
"Many women who are suffering the effects of gender discrimination may be unaware that it is occurring or afraid they may be fired if they ask about pay or promotion opportunities," she said.
The report shows the gender pay gap grows with age. Women ages 18 to 24 earn 88 percent of what their male counterparts earn, while women over age 35 earn 76 percent.
"Today is an important reminder of the injustice of unequal pay and the harm it inflicts on women and their families," Maloney said.
Obama welcomed ranking female officials and professional women's tennis player Billie Jean King to the designation of the Belmont-Paul Women's Equality National Museum as a national monument. He singled out Sen. Barbara Mikulski, D-Md., the longest-serving female member of Congress. She is retiring this year.
Obama said pay equality should be a fundamental principal of the economy.
"It's the idea that whether you're a high school teacher, a business executive, or a professional soccer player or tennis player, your work should be equally valued and rewarded, whether you are a man or a woman," Obama said.
Asked about how she became an activist for equal pay, Arquette said the financial struggles her mother faced when raising her children and the financial struggles she faced herself made her want to push for change.
"I know what it was like, at 20, to struggle to buy diapers and food while we lived in a converted garage," she said. "While I'll tell you it's not easy, it's way harder when you're being underpaid."
In honor of Equal Pay Day, some Democratic women opened a lemonade stand for the day across the street from the Republican Party headquarters, charging women 79 cents per cup and men $1 to demonstrate the wage gap.
Time magazine created a pay gap calculator that shows the difference in pay by factoring in gender, occupation and age. If a woman enters in her age and occupation, she can see the average pay difference between her and a man in the same position. The results are based on data from the U.S. Census Bureau from 2008 to 2012.
Reach reporter Tia Rinehart at [email protected] or 202-408-1490. SHFWire stories are free to any news organization that gives the reporter a byline and credits the SHFWire. Like the Scripps Howard Foundation Wire interns on Facebook and follow us on Twitter and Instagram.
Download photos: Equal-Pay.zip
About Tia Rinehart - Spring 2016
Tia Rinehart is a Spring 2016 reporter for the SHFWire from Southern Illinois University.


text: Last week in Vienna, my friend Ena and I visited the Africa festival on Danube Island. I ate yummy Ethiopian food, and then we spent the entire evening looking at the jewelry, clothes and other beautiful things that were on display in tents all over the island. We discovered waxprints for 8€/m at one of…Read More


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For a network that's somewhat known for their focus on procedural dramas, well, at least this one is trying to be a little different. It springs from the minds of a fantastic creative team (JJ Abrams and Jonathan Nolan) and the two leads have every chance of becoming quite the formidable TV crime-stopping duo.What if a reclusive billionaire used his considerable resources to recruit one highly capable man to help him use the omnipresent surveillance technology of a post 9/11 NYC in order to prevent crimes? Well you'd get lots of scenes of people being tailed, spied on, and scene change graphics that involve shots of various surveillance footage from around the city. I really hope that's not going to become something they do in every episode, it got old about halfway through. But the first episode showed enough solid promise that I could see this show getting the chance it needs to really come into its own.Basically, Jim Caviezel plays a man with no name (or several depending on how much you know about him) and a dark past who's minding his own crazy hobo-bearded self when Mr. Finch approaches him to help with this project he's been working on. If the pilot episode had a title it would be 'Exposition' as that's basically what the entirety of Emerson and Caviezel's scenes consist of. And that's fine for the first episode, because the premise needs to be understood so that in future episodes they can just get on with telling their stories. It's certainly seeming like Mr. Finch ignoring the 'irrelevant' listings is likely what lead him to start this quest for justice. And what could have led to that pronounced limp Emerson is giving Finch when he moves around in his scenes.
The two leads have a decent amount of chemistry with room for growth as the intricacies of each character reveal themselves. All we know right now is that John Reese lost someone very close to him and he was part of the CIA before he was presumed dead–a trait also shared by Finch. So these two ghost on the edges of society to try to stop what can be stopped. The show even admits that crimes of passion won't be prevented by what Finch's machine can do. But with some clever writing and good interplay between characters, this show can go far.
For one thing, any show that puts Michael Emerson (he of LOST fame) on my TV screen weekly is providing a service. From the moment he appears on-screen, you want to know everything there is to know about Finch and in less capable hands that wouldn't happen. The opposite is true of Caviezel's John Reese. It appears that there are going to be flashbacks and such to show how he became the kind of man who wound up with no one. Frankly, I'm more interested in seeing how his character can grow within his current life situation and with the new people he'll wind up meeting like Finch and others such as the cop he wants to work with, or Taraji P. Henson's Detective Carter–the inevitable character who will follow the breadcrumbs to wind up involved in Reese and Finch's mission.
I'm also looking forward to seeing what sort of production value future episodes hold. In this episode there were all the musical accompaniments and brash stunt sequences you might find in an action suspense film. A personal favorite had to be the very Jason Bourne-like way that John takes out a room of thugs in order to steal their artillery. That's what Caviezel is bringing to the table–bravado and a hint of 'don't know what he'll do next' spontaneity. And because it is from Bad Robot I of course have high hopes that the show will build into the type of top-notch action-filled drama it has the potential to be.


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(Components list at bottom of page)
Moroccan Sunset
by: Pam Kearns
I saw so many possibilities when I saw the large-hole faceted rondelle beads. I immediately went into the store to try and fit them on the 5mm leather -- they fit! The result - the quickest and easiest necklace you'll ever make.
1. Take a piece of 5mm round leather, the length that you need to create a collar length necklace. In my case, it is 17" (the clasp adds about 3/4")
2. Arrange the big hole faceted rondelle beads in the colour order you like.
3. String the beads onto the leather, added 2 corrugated circle rings between each bead. I also added 2 circles before the first bead and after the last bead.
4. Glue the clasp onto the leather.
I didn't glue down any of the beads because I liked the movement. If you wish, you can add a drop of glue to the first and last bead to hold the group of beads together.
Clicking on components links will open a new window so that you don't lose this page.
|Qty: 1
|s32976 Adhesive - 3 gram Super New Glue -
|Price: $ 2.95
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|s37594 Findings - 5mm Round Leather - Curved Tube Magnetic Clasp - Antiqued Copper
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|s47763 Glass - Big Hole Faceted Rondelle Donut - Earth Treasure Picasso (10)
|Price: $ 9.91
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|s26462 Link - 10mm Corrugated Circle Ring - Bright Copper
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|s35382 Stringing - 5mm Round Leather Cord - Sea Grass (Inch)
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The Importance of a Good Plastic Surgeon
Many women want to have a shapely body, which is why many have resorted to dieting and exercise. These methods, however, can take a long time to have results, and often the results are not enough. For these reasons, they go to have plastic surgery, and the most popular and frequently requested surgery is breast augmentation.
Breast augmentation (augmentation mammoplasty) is the surgical process of increasing the shape, fullness, and most importantly the size of the breast. Surgeons use saline, silicone, or alternative composite breast implants placed under the breast tissue or under the chest muscles. It is usually intended for those who have naturally small breast, to make the breasts be more symmetrical, and restoring breast size (caused by childbirth, weight loss, breastfeeding, breast cancer, or other conditions that damaged the breast).
Women considering having breast augmentation should be careful, though. Because of the demand for such surgeries, many fake or unlicensed doctors and surgeons have started doing the procedure, risking the health of many women not only in the United States but around the world. Many of these surgeries often result to dangerous medical mistakes that put the health of the patients at great risk. Choosing the wrong doctor without proper research or evaluation of their training and credentials could result in a medical mistake that could prove life-threatening.
Breast augmentation is a serious and risky surgery that requires professionals that know what they are doing, and are very familiar with the risks and fragility of the procedure. Some dangers that can come about from bad breast augmentation are infections, necrosis (where tissues around the implants die and cause lasting scarring and deformities), and synmastia (the implants pull the skin away from the breast bone). Many patients have also reported loss of sensation and large hematomas that require surgery.
Making the right surgeon for breast augmentation would greatly lower the chances of getting any type of medical mistake. Understanding how the procedure works, and knowing the right questions to ask would help in making sure the surgeon is properly qualified to do the procedure. Additionally, find the one that provides a certain level of trust and comfort, as rapport can ease the nerves and provide positive input to get the best results.read more