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|Dara Ó Briain
Ó Briain hosting Mock The Week.
4 February 1972 (age 42)
Stand-up and television
Years active
1998 - Present
Eddie Izzard
Susan (2006-present)
Notable works & roles
Don't Feed The Gondolas (1998-2000)
Dara Ó Briain (born 4 February 1972) is an award-winning Irish comedian and television presenter, currently most famous for hosting topical panel show Mock The Week. Ó Briain has hosted and appeared on a number of successful panel shows including The Panel, Don't Feed the Gondolas, Mock The Week , Have I Got News For You and QI. Writing for the The Evening Standard, Bruce Dessau noted that "If you don't laugh at Ó Briain, check your pulse, you must be dead."
The comedian has been described as Terry Wogan's heir apparent as Britain's favourite Irish man.
Early lifeEdit
Ó Briain was born in Bray, County Wicklow and attended Coláiste Eoin, a Gaelcholáiste on Dublin's southside. He attended University College, Dublin, where he studied maths and theoretical physics. In 2008, he remarked: "I haven't written it into my act, but it occasionally comes through. I could come on with a chalkboard and say: 'Now you're all going to pay attention.'" While a student there, he was both the auditor of the Literary and Historical Society (the university's oldest debating society) and the co-founder and co-editor of the University Observer college newspaper. In 1994, he won the Irish Times National Debating Championship and the Irish Times/Gael Linn National Irish language debating championship; he is fluent in Irish.
Early careerEdit
After leaving college, Ó Briain began working at RTÉ as a children's TV presenter. At this time he also began performing his first stand-up gigs on the Irish comedy circuit. He admitted, "I did the trip from Donegal to Dublin to play to six people; then I turned round and drove home again. I did about three or four years playing to a lot of bad rooms, but learning as I went. It's not bad when someone gives you £40 for standing up and telling jokes. I remember thinking: 'This is the life.'" Ó Briain spent three years as a presenter on the bilingual (Irish and English) language children's programme Echo Island but came to prominence as a team captain on the topical panel show Don't Feed The Gondolas (1998-2000) hosted by Seán Moncrieff.
Stand-up comedyEdit
Ó Briain's stand up career internationally took off around this time as he began to tour heavily, performing across Europe, Asia, Australia and North America, with gigs in Dubai, Boston, Adelaide, Shanghai and New York. He was a regular at the Kilkenny Cat Laughs and the Edinburgh Festival, as well as making one notable appearance at the Just For Laughs festival in Montreal in 2002 where he was offered a prestigious gala show because of his performances at the Irish showcase. Around this time Ó Briain presented the weekend mainstream game show It's a Family Affair for RTÉ. It was the first time he worked with former Channel 4 commissioning editor Séamus Cassidy. They later set up the production company Happy Endings Productions, and together they produced (and Ó Briain presented) the chat show Buried Alive (2003) and most famously in Ireland The Panel (2003-2006).
Panel showsEdit
The Panel was hosted by Ó Briain. Three times nominated for the Best Entertainment show IFTA (Irish Film and Television Award) the show has a rotating cast of panelists, usually drawn from the world of Irish comedy, discussing the events of the week and interviewing guests. The most regular panelists have been Colin Murphy, Ed Byrne, Neil Delamere and Andrew Maxwell.
Around 2002, with his profile rising in the UK due to his one-man shows at the Edinburgh fringe festival, Ó Briain began to make appearances on UK television shows such as Bring Me the Head of Light Entertainment (a Channel 5 production) and Never Mind the Buzzcocks. At the start of 2003 he hosted the second series of BBC Scotland's Live Floor Show. His big break in UK television came in 2003 when he made an appearance as guest and, ultimately, made several appearances as guest host of the popular news quiz, Have I Got News for You.
He was nominated in 2003 at the Chortle Comedy Awards for Live Comedy in the categories Best Compère and Best Headline Act (which he would go on to win). In 2004 he won the Best Headliner award again, as well as being nominated for Best Full-length Show. Since 2005 he has been the host of the comedy panel game Mock the Week on BBC television, a blend between Have I Got News for You and Whose Line Is It Anyway?. He is a relatively frequent panelist on QI, and wrote about Ireland in the QI series E annual, and appears occasionally on Just a Minute on BBC Radio 4. He has also appeared in and hosted the stand-up show Live at the Apollo.
Dara stars in the new BBC Radio show about "the world according to science". Episode 1 of "Infinite Monkey Cage" began on 30 November 2009 on Radio 4 at 16:30 GMT.
In 2010, Dara will star in the Sky1 show, A League of Their Own.
Tours, chat shows and writingEdit
Other notable television work includes hosting the BBC sitcom writing competition "Last Laugh", and three documentaries which re-created the British comedy novel Three Men in a Boat. For this, Ó Briain rowed up the River Thames with Griff Rhys Jones and Rory McGrath. A sequel, Three Men in Another Boat, in which they raced from the Tower Bridge to the Isle of Wight, was first aired in January 2008, and the third in the series, Three Men in More Than One Boat, was broadcast in January 2009. A further series, Three Men go to Ireland, was first broadcast at Christmas 2009.
In 2005, Ó Briain's show at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe was the biggest selling solo comedy show of the festival. On 14 September 2005, he appeared as a guest on Room 101, where he got rid of children's television presenters (originating from his co-presenters on Echo Island) and once-in-a-lifetime experiences (he was given a once-in-a-lifetime experience on the show, by being the second guest, the first being former host Nick Hancock, to pull the lever that opens the chute to Room 101), banter, Gillian McKeith (host of You Are What You Eat) and magicians.
Ó Briain conducted his third and largest multinational tour of the United Kingdom and Ireland in early 2006. This included 66 shows across London, Manchester, Birmingham, Glasgow, Cardiff and Belfast, as well as 9 nights in Dublin. His second night in the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane in London was recorded for his first live DVD. His fourth multinational tour followed in late 2007, which as he says in his routine has "no title" but was almost entitled "You Had to Be There". Ó Briain has also been an extensive newspaper columnist, with pieces published in many national papers in both the UK and Ireland, from the Sunday Times to the Daily Telegraph. On 9 August, 2006, he hosted the first episode of his new celebrity chat show, Turn Back Time.
Ó Briain released his first book on 1 October 2009, the book is entitled Tickling the English and is about what he perceives it means to be English. As part of its promotion he has stated that he is a great fan of English culture and a student of English history, his favourite periods being the Gin Craze and the civil war. His favourite historical Englishman is Oliver Cromwell. In a review of 'Tickling the English' O'Briain was described as Terry Wogan's heir apparent as Britain's 'favourite Irishman'.
Personal lifeEdit
Ó Briain married his wife Susan, a doctor, in 2006 and they have a daughter, born in 2008. He describes himself as looking like "one of Tony Soprano's henchmen", and admits that, "living in London I probably only get recognised about once a day. And that's okay by me. I'm not a celebrity. And I certainly don't see myself as one."
Ó Briain has said he sees himself as an atheist, but "ethnically Catholic": "I'm staunchly atheist, I simply don't believe in God. But I'm still Catholic, of course. Catholicism has a much broader reach than just the religion. I'm technically Catholic, it's the box you have to tick on the census form: 'Don't believe in God, but I do still hate Rangers.'
His surname is the original Irish form of O'Brien, indicating his descent from King Brian Boru (c. 941-1014). He admitted, "My dad was involved in the Irish language movement and changed it. Even Irish people are now confused by it".
He is a keen Arsenal F.C. fan
Ó Briain was one one of fifteen members of a racing greyhound syndicate for several years. The December 2009 transmission of "Three Men Go To Ireland" featured their dog Snip Nua who, by the time of transmission, had been put down following injuries sustained in a race. Ó Briain was so upset about the death that he and his fellow syndicate members immediately disbanded the syndicate permanently.
DVD releasesEdit
- Dara O'Briain: Live at the Theatre Royal (2006)
- Mock the Week: Too Hot For TV (2007)
- Dara O'Briain Talks Funny: Live in London (2008)
- Mock the Week: Too Hot For TV 2 (2009)
- Mock the Week: Too Hot For TV 3 (2010)
External linksEdit
|Mock the Week – The Regulars
|Dara Ó Briain (Series 1–) · Hugh Dennis (Series 1–) · Andy Parsons (Series 3–) · Russell Howard (Series 4–) · Rory Bremner (Series 1–2) · Frankie Boyle (Series 1–7)


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But, from so many carpet cleaners how to find the most trustworthy and best one? Here is the most common frequently asked a question to help you choose the best carpet cleaner. Considering these questions also provide you answer to, how can I find the carpet cleaning near me?
#Que1: Are you bonded and insured?
If you will use the cleaning solutions in the incorrect way, then it can ruin your carpet causing discoloration. Hiring bonded and insured carpet cleaning service provider help you provide the best cleaning service. Also, you can ask them about your concerns regarding how to clean carpet efficiently.
#Que2: How much time it will take to dry my carpet after the cleaning completes?
Approximately it will take 24 hours to dry the carpet, due to many variables such as humidity and type of fiber. But, you can also shorten the carpet time by opening windows, using fans or turning up the heater in the winter. They also recommend it to keep your pets off when to dry the carpet.
#Que3: What are the different carpet cleaning methods used for cleaning?
Asking these questions help you know risk behind damaging your carpet fabric. There are different cleaning methods used to eliminate the deeply embedded dust contaminants from the carpet. These methods can be carpet steam cleaning, hot water extraction or dry cleaning.
#Que4: Do you provide guaranteed cleaning service?
Asking for guarantee cleaning service ensure your quality work plus satisfactory cleaning result. The guarantee is everything in the cleaning industry. But different companies provide this service under some conditions. Therefore, it is essential to ask this question up front.
Need Professional Help For Your Upcoming Carpet Cleaning Project?
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subset: commoncrawl


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We support young people aged 11 to 19 to explore their career aspirations and to make informed decisions about subject choices, further and higher education, apprenticeships and future employment.
Find out about who we are, our qualifications, expericence and how to contact us.
Explore how we can help your organisation to deliver career advice and guidance.
Tools and resources available on-line to support young people to make decisions about their future.


text: Brief ReportModelling Valuations for Eq-5d Health States: An Alternative Model Using Differences in ValuationsDolan, Paul DPhil; Roberts, Jennifer PhDAuthor Information From the School of Health and Related Research, University of Sheffield, Western Bank, Sheffield. Address correspondence and reprint requests to: Jennifer Roberts, University of Sheffield, Sheffield, United Kingdom S1 4DA. E-mail: email@example.com Received July 23, 2001; initial review September 12, 2001; accepted December 3, 2001. Medical Care: May 2002 - Volume 40 - Issue 5 - p 442-446 Buy Abstract Objectives. The EQ-5D is a preference-based measure of health and is increasingly being used in the evaluation of health technologies. A 'tariff' of values for all 243 EQ-5D health states has been generated using direct valuations on a subset of these states. The tariff is used to express the value of differences between health states, and so this paper explores whether a tariff with better predictive ability can be calculated using differences between values rather than using the values themselves. Methods. The original tariff (reported in this journal) was based on valuations for 42 EQ-5D states elicited from a representative sample of 2997 members of the UK general population using the time trade-off method. This same data are used to estimate a tariff based upon the differences in value between the worst possible state (33333) and all other states. Results. A simple model that fits the data well is one in which the differences in value between 33333 and all other states are explained in terms of the change in each dimension plus a term to pick up whether some dimensions change by the maximum amount whereas others do not change at all. The mean absolute difference between the actual values and those predicted by this model is 0.03 (compared with 0.039 in the original model). Conclusion. The model presented in this paper predicts the difference between 33333 and all other states remarkably well and can be used to generate a tariff for all EQ-5D health states. In fact, this model more accurately predicts the values of states for which there are direct observations, and so we recommend its comparison with the original model in evaluative studies. © 2002 Lippincott Williams & Wilkins, Inc.


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These days, it seems like every Tom, Dick and Harry has a personal blog, and all kinds of businesses are getting in on the action too. Blogs are a great way to attract new customers, share the latest business trends and develop a voice for your business. Once you decide to take the plunge and create a company blog, the next step is figuring out how to increase its reach and make sure it's getting the page clicks it deserves. There are many ways to go about this, but in a recent ProOpinion poll, most business professionals surveyed - 36 percent - thought that being active in social media groups was most important in attracting customers to a blog.
Social media is an extremely useful tool when it comes to expanding your company blog's reach. Here's how you can make sure your social media profiles are engaging customers and steering them toward your blog.
Know which social media sites to use
Depending on the nature of your business, you likely have a target market with specific characteristics and interests when it comes to social media. Do your market research to figure out which types of social media your customers are most likely using. For example, a business-to-business company may want to frequent professional sites like LinkedIn or Google+, while a company focused on a specific type of consumer, like young adults, may want to use a platform like Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. If you're posting links to your blog on social media sites that your customers aren't as likely to use, you're missing the mark.
Add social media buttons to your website
According to LinkedIn, one of the best ways to drive customers to your social media sites and blog is by embedding your website with social media links. Your website is probably where many of your customer interactions take place, so it makes sense to grab their attention there first. If a person finds a good piece of content on your site, social media buttons will allow him or her to share the information with friends, which could net you more business. It also encourages customers to interact with your other social media pages that they might not have known about.
"Visual content is often the most engaging, since it attracts people's attention at first glance."
Use various types of content
If you're posting the same types of content on your blog, you might run into trouble when you're trying to promote it on your social media channels, since after the first couple of posts, the novelty may have worn off. Stir up interest by including all different types of content in your blog, from videos to infographics, articles, news stories, photos, links, polls and questions. Track the amount of engagement you get for each type of content, then keep using the most popular forms to keep your customers engaged and excited about what your company has to offer. According to LinkedIn, visual content is often the most engaging, since it attracts people's attention at first glance when they're scrolling through pages or news feeds. If your blog is simply a bunch of text, they won't be as likely to check it out.
Be active
Every time you have a new post on your blog, you should link to it on your social media sites and draw as much attention to it as you can. Develop a regular schedule so your customers have a good idea of when they can expect another industry news update or tidbit of information about your company. Aim to post during the times when your customers are most likely to be on social media, like during lunch breaks or after work. Encourage engagement by asking plenty of questions and answering any questions posed to your business.
Add customer service to your social media
American Express noted that designating someone to manage customer service across your social media channels is a good strategy to keep engagement high and positive. Not only will you be able to address concerns and issues that customers bring up on your blog or social media pages, but you can respond to positive feedback and thank customers for getting in touch. If readers see that you're striving to address every single comment no matter what it pertains to, they'll likely be impressed with your dedication.
Introduce contests
There's nothing like a contest to get people excited about your product and drive traffic to your blog. Come up with a good incentive, then post about it on social media. You may want to include instructions to enter that get your followers to share your blog, such as using a certain hashtag or sharing your post. You may be surprised at how many new clicks your blog gets after you use it to explain the details of the contest.
Like what you read? Great. Our blog is packed with FREE b2b content and meaningful research data aimed to help business professionals . It's free to join, all you have to do is enter a few details below.
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ProOpinion is a community fueled by thousands of business professionals and driven by research. We provide unique, research powered content, unavailable elsewhere because ProOpinion is your source of the research. Content is plentiful, easily accessible, and most importantly, it's meaningful. Members of this community are dedicated to progress, fully committed to sparking innovation, and persistent in their pursuit of a better business world.


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Hipp Organic Ricecakes
Hipp Organic Apple rice cakes are my kids all time favourite supper choice and have been for ages. I am as anxious if I run out as much as if I had run out of milk . They are a huge hit in our house. I love them too because of their fab ingrediaents and little kid 'friendliness' They are
- Gluten free
- No added sugar/salt
- No added milk
- Suitable for vegetarians
- No articfical colours
- Easy to hold
- great for all the family
Suitable from 7 months too they are just your perfect little kid snack! The little nibbles range of ricecakes is great as they are prepared using organic ingredients and they taste great. We have had apple and the blueberry ones before but in the selection we were sent were some savoury options.
New to us were organic carrot and punpkin rice cakes which the kids really liked and organic tomato and sweet red pepper which they loved. I was pretty surprised by this, but delighted too. Adds some varety to supper in our house! There are lots of other sorts of snacks in the little nibbles range fromm Hipp Organic well worth a look.
Good Value?
The ricecakes real at about £1 for a 40g bag which I think is excllent . Be sure to seal them airtight as they can go stale if not sealed.
Baby club I would recommend joining their babyclub: http://www.hippbabyclub.co.uk On joining they send out a package of samples that is really quite generous.


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What is Data Validation Testing?
Data Validation testing is a process that allows the user to check that the provided data, they deal with, is valid or complete. Data Validation Testing responsible for validating data and databases successfully through any needed transformations without loss. It also verifies that the database stays with specific and incorrect data properly. In simple words, data validation is a part of Database testing, in which individual checks that the entered data valid or not according to the provided business conditions.
Data Validation Process | How Does Data Validation Testing Work?
Data Validation process consists of four significant steps.
Detail Plan – It is the most critical step, to create the proper roadmap for data validation. It deals with the overall expectation if there is an issue in source data, then how to resolve that issue? It deals in defining the number of iterations, required during data validation.
Validate the database – This is responsible for ensuring that all the applicable data is present from source to sink. This step is responsible for determining the number of records, size of data, comparison of source and target based on the data field.
Validate Data Formatting – The main focus is that the data clearly understood in the target system, the end-users should clearly understand data whether it is meeting the business expectation or not.
Sampling – Before testing on the large set of data, it is necessary to do sampling. It is essential to do testing on the small amount of data and check if the sample data meets the business requirement, if yes then only proceed with a large set of data. It will also decrease the error rate for data and increase the quality and accuracy of the data.
Benefits of Data Validation Testing
Data Validation testing, ensures that the data collected is accurate, qualitative and healthy. Is the collected data from different resources, meet the business requirement or not?
Below are several benefits to Data Validation testing –
- Business requirement – Data validation testing helps an individual to ensure that the data collected from different sources, maybe structured or unstructured, meet the Business requirement or not.
- Data Accuracy – In the future, the volume of data increases and most probably, most of the data will be unstructured. It's impossible to imagine to analyze this amount of data. Before mining, it is necessary to convert this data into a structured format. So it's better to deal with the right kind of the data only which meets business requirements.
- Better Decision Making
- Better Strategy and Enhanced Market Goals
- Increased Profits and Reduced Loss – If the data is accurate and correctly analyzed, then obviously there will be less loss, and on the other hand, there will be an increase in profit.
Why Data Validation Testing Matters?
Regarding Big Data, Data Validation is one of the most critical components of data collection. Data Validation Testing matters because it helps an individual to ensure that the data, dealing with is not corrupted and also responsible for checking that the provided data is accurate or not. It also helps in verifying that the information provided validated against the actual business requirement or not. The initial data fed into the Hadoop Distributed File System (HDFS) and validated.
How to Adopt Data Validation Testing?
There are various approaches and techniques to accomplish Data Validation testing.
- Data Accuracy testing to ensure that the provided data is correct.
- Data Completeness testing to check whether the data is complete or not.
- Data Transformation Testing to verify that the provided data goes successfully through transformations or not.
- Data Quality testing to handle bad data.
- Database comparison testing to compare the source DB and target DB.
- End to End testing.
- Data warehouse testing.
Best Practises of Data Validation Testing
- It is highly recommended to analyze the data to understand the requirement which is a need for business purpose.
- Handle bad data correctly.
- Use of the particular tool which fits perfectly between source and target.
- Firstly, test on sample data instead of full complete data. This process will save time as well as resources also.
- Compare the output result with the expected.
Key Data Validation Testing Tools | Data Validation Softwares
Various tools are available in the market for data validation. Some of them given below –
- Datameer
- Talend
- Informatica
- QuerySurge
- Datagaps ETL Validator
- DbFit
- Data Centric Testing


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Saturday, Sept. 7, and Sunday, Sept. 8, 2019
4 Pardee Ave., Unit 100
Click here to fill out an audition form
Established in 2008, the JAZZ.FM91 Youth Big Band is a free music education program available to successful candidates. It provides an opportunity for selected middle- and high-school students to work in an 18-piece jazz ensemble where students develop skills in ensemble playing, improvisation and jazz techniques while interacting in a diverse, professional setting.
The JAZZ.FM91 Youth Big Band and the JAZZ.FM91 Seminar Big Band each hold rehearsals Saturday afternoons under the direction of Jules Estrin at the JAZZ.FM91 studios in Liberty Village (King and Dufferin).
The JAZZ.FM91 Youth Big Band has performed with such jazz luminaries as Randy Brecker, Joey DeFrancesco, Lew Tabakin, Tom Scott, PJ Perry and Guido Basso, and it maintains a busy concert schedule during the year.
Audition requirements for piano, guitar, bass, saxophone, trumpet and trombone:
- three major and three minor scales (range of the instrument)
- classical etude or study
- bebop head or jazz melody
- improvised solo (optional)
- sight reading (to be provided)


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You don't like getting spam, do you? Well, neither do hiring managers. It may be quick and efficient to upload your resume on popular job sites and send employers the same robo-resume, but hiring managers view these generic, mass mailings as spam. They can spot one-size-fits-all resumes in a nano-second and quickly discard them.
Here are four tips from hiring managers featured in the book, Graduate to a Great Career, on how to create a winning resume:
1. Add a short profile statement and your key selling points at the top "above the fold"
Realize your resume is an ad for branding yourself. Like a newspaper, an ad, or web page, the most important "real estate" is in the top half of your resume. Branding resumes begin with a profile or qualifications statement, a couple of crisp sentences that define your value. A strong profile statement is critical for recent graduates. You don't have an impressive job title and career history yet, so you'll need to specify your career focus and value proposition in your profile statement. In fact, many hiring managers told me a big problem with new graduate resumes is it can be hard to determine what entry-level job the new grad is looking for, especially if the grad doesn't have a career-specific major like accounting or computer science. A profile headline like "Seeking an entry-level positioning" is too generic and doesn't convey your career path. Remember, it's your job to convey your career identity, not the hiring manager's. For example, a recent grad named Erin who was a psychology major pursuing a career in marketing began her profile with the headline, "Aspiring marketing assistant: Psychology grad with pulse on the consumer mindset," followed by a few bullets outlining her focus, strengths, and marketing credentials through two internships.
2. Expand your skill set to take advantage of new market opportunities
Be willing to take advantage of where the momentum is in the marketplace. During her job search for marketing jobs, Erin, our aspiring marketer mentioned above, noticed big retailers were advertising entry-level jobs and internships in merchandising, an area related to marketing that involves selecting products and evaluating sales performance. She decided to expand her job search and pursue both career paths: merchandising and marketing. Because there were a lot of merchandising internships online, she snagged a three-month, part-time internship at a large global retailer. But Erin needed a different elevator pitch and resume to apply for full-time merchandising jobs, and now with her internship, she had a story to tell. She had a hands-on role in compiling trend and competitive analysis reports, which gave her specific marketable skills. Here is Erin's new profile statement for her merchandising resume, "Merchandising assistant with strong analytic, merchandising, and marketing skills." She included new skills such as "completed Excel reports for accurate demand forecasting that resulted in a 10% improvement in accurate buying." Before long, Erin was offered a merchandising job at a top global retailer.
3. Play to keywords and how the resume robots screen resumes.
The first "person" your resume has to impress is not likely to be a human being but a computer. Due to the volume of resumes that large and medium-sized companies receive, most companies use ATS (applicant tracking systems). Most ATS's are not kind to new grads since they are programmed to check for a strong keyword match. Since most recent grads have limited experience, they don't score high on an ATS (Only 25% of resumes make it past the resume robots). If you do have a strong skills match with a job posting, take the time to use the same exact words in your resume so the resume robots pick them out. Your resume can also be discarded if you format it incorrectly. Keep the layout simple with commonly used section titles like profile, work experience, education, etc.
4. Emphasize skills, experience, and results in the "Action + Numbers = Results" format.
Employers now give twice as much importance to specific skills and work experience as academic courses and grades. How do you make your abilities and skills stand out when you're a new grad with limited work experience? It might take more effort than for an experienced job seeker, but you have more experience and accomplishments than you realize. Make a list of everything you've ever accomplished in internships, school projects, volunteer activities, part-time jobs, and the like. Then, follow this formula to create a powerful results bullet:
Action + Numbers = Results
Did [A] + as measured by [N] = with these results [R]
Here are a few examples of how college students and recent grads have created marketable results bullets out of internships and part-time jobs:
• Raised $55,000 in first month calling alumni for university capital
campaign; the top student performer all four weeks.
• As a brand ambassador interning at X Company, challenged to increase
website traffic, wrote ten blog posts that generated over 240 responses,
and helped boost sales.
• Prepared detailed Excel reports and pitches for business development
group at fast-growing technology company that
increased response rate by 15%.
The key to a successful resume and job search is to go for quality over quantity. You need to invest a little more time to create a resume that is right for each job, but it will pay off. Your efforts will be rewarded, and you'll be on your way to an interview in no time.
Catherine Kaputa is a Personal Brand Strategist, Speaker, and Author of the newly-released book, Graduate to a Great Career: How Smart Students, New Graduates, and Young Professionals Can Launch Brand You. (April 2016. graduatetoagreatcareer.com). She is the author of two best-selling books, You Are a Brand and Breakthrough Branding for entrepreneurs. She is the Founder of SelfBrand (selfbrand.com). Speaking clients include Google, PepsiCo, Microsoft, Intel, Citi, Merck, Northwestern University, New York University, and University of Illinois.
Students go off to college, but it's not the rosy life they see in the movies. There are bills to pay, tuition to afford, books to buy, and honestly, balancing finances at a young age is hard. Studying in college and concentrating on getting good grades is tough enough without throwing in a job into the mix. But the money has to flow in to either support the family or to support getting an education. Whatever the reason, here are a few tips to help college students juggle their working and studying lives.
1. Find a job with flexible hours: Let's face it; students are in college now. There will be coursework and assignments with tight deadlines, and studying should always be a priority. An education will serve as the building blocks for the future so students shouldn't push it in the backburner. They should find jobs where they can easily accommodate their studies, too, so neither one suffers. These jobs could be within the college campus, as those kinds of jobs understand the balance between work and study, and they can help college students manage their homework.
2. Manage time wisely: With so much on the line, it is wise to have a good time management schedule. College students should know where they spend their time. Many successful people plan nearly each moment of their day to get the most out of their 24 hours. Many times we end up wasting time and not realizing it when we could be putting it to good use. Use lunch breaks to catch up on math homework, or grab a few hours of work during a long lunch break in college. Those few hours can add up during the week. Students need to keep checking in to see if they're on track per their schedules to know they're not overcommitting themselves or falling short of their goals. If students know they function better in the mornings, they should get evening jobs so they can do coursework or assignments when they're fresh and vice versa.
3. Have family support: This goes without saying; without a support system, college students will find it very hard to adjust both lives alone. Students should inform their managers at work, friends, or family to support them in this decision, and help them both personally and professionally. This kind of support will help students infinitely when they feel the pressure is too much, or they need help with managing homework.
4. Know what they want: College students should choose jobs wisely if they can. Students should think about how what they do now could benefit them in the future. Remember, everything can be added to their portfolios. If working in a store, think of inventory – managing time and stock. All of this could and should be interpreted as work experience, and this could boost entry into the working world by gaining experience, references, professional growth, and of course, the money.
5. Be creative in getting homework done: By having a job, college students are effectively cutting down on their study hours. Students must be smart about juggling their time, and try listening to lectures while working. They should also keep their managers in the loop so they get that support system. This way, students can learn, revise, and perhaps even do homework during work hours, which don't require much brain activity like sorting mail, etc.
6. Take a mental break: It is important to have some time out from studies. Always having studies/ homework on the mind will stress students out, especially if they know they can't do it during work hours. Allow a study free zone while at work. Know there is nothing students can do about it, so they should give themselves permission to relax. Many times we block ourselves, and take on more stress over things we cannot control. Those moments students are not thinking about studies could benefit them in the long run. This way, they can approach their assignments with a fresh mind.
7. Stay focused on the end goal: The end goal should be graduating. Many times, once students start working, they find it hard to stay focused on education. It becomes easy to forget about studies and think about short term benefits, such as getting paid. This spending power lets many people forget about graduating. College students must find ways to motivate themselves. Keep pictures of graduates at their ceremonies or photos of people who managed to reach the pinnacle of their careers to have an aim and a goal to reach.
8. Research on future courses: Students should find courses relevant to them and their future interests. Don't choose a random course because friends are taking it, or because somebody else has a strong opinion about it. Students need to discover what they are passionate about and what they see themselves doing in the future. Doing some research on courses will help them achieve their future goals.
9. Be smart financially: Money can flow through college students' fingers like water if they're not careful. Keep track on spending and where the money has to be allocated. If there are bills to pay, keep that money aside, or pay off debts before doing anything else. This helps students become more financially independent. This not involves their weekly paycheck, but also their tuition. Most colleges have hefty fees so be sure to enroll in a program where there are future benefits. Don't get a job and go into debt due to careless spending, as this will cause a downward spiral.
10. Be passionate: Happiness can only come from within. College students should be passionate about the courses they will be taking; passion will get them through tough times. If students truly do something they love, they will excel in it. Be happy at the workplace. Find a job that is mentally stimulating or has a good work team. This makes a huge difference in students' mental health and happiness, and when they're young and balancing their work and study lives, this is very important.
The balance for managing studies and work can be a fine line, and one that should be carefully monitored so college students don't end up suffering by their decision to work. This has become a recent trend, as many young students have bills to pay, and this enables them to gain work experience while also getting homework help and inspiration from their coworkers or family.
Need more tips for college students, check out College Recruiter's blog and follow us on Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, and Twitter.
Anthony Taylor is a writer, student and editor on student's writing website. He loves reading, writing motivational stories and spending the time with his family. You can follow him on Twitter and Google+ for more interesting stories.
According to the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development, or OECD, there's a crisis in the USA with only 46% of students finishing college. Whether you have dropped out or graduated with low grades you are not alone. Interviews can be a nerve-wracking experience, particularly your very first one, but if you are leaving college with low grades, the prospect of interviews can seem even more daunting. It is important to remember that despite low grades, you have still been invited for an interview, so the employer is interested in you. If you are worried about explaining your low grades, these tips can help you deal with this without it becoming a major issue. (more…)
Many employers prefer job candidates to have work experience when they apply for jobs. While gaining work experience gives college students and recent graduates a leg up on their competition, there are ways to overcome not having it. Bill Driscoll, District President of Accountemps, discusses the work experience dilemma and offers advice to college students and recent graduates searching for entry-level jobs. (more…)
If you are going to start college then congratulations because you are going to start a new chapter of your life and you have to make sure that you will make the most out of it. The moment that you get accepted into the college of your choice, you cannot help but feel euphoria because it seems surreal.
There is a chance that you have already heard a lot of things about college life and you cannot help but feel a bit scared because you feel that you already know what you want to expect. Are you sure that everything that you have heard is true? What if some of the things that you have learned are just myths? (more…)
There's good news and bad news for those who had a rough time in undergrad and are now thinking about graduate studies. The good news is, you are now older and have more experience, so it's likely you won't get caught up in the same business that gave you trouble in the first place. The bad news is, you're going to have to find a way to overshadow any anomalous GPA issues. But let's start with the most important concern. (more…)
In recent years, students and parents have increasingly found the lower tuition costs associated with community colleges to be a big draw. For many families, the cost of a four-year university simply isn't feasible and many students are not willing or able to borrow the student loans needed to cover the costs. With that being said, eventually students do have to make the transition from community college to a university, should they decide to continue pursuing a bachelor's degree. (more…)
This article features a list of study resources that will help improve your grammar and writing and help you get better grades on your essays and dissertations. There is a very mixed list of websites that can be helpful both for young and experienced students. Besides, several resources can be easily used by people that have English as their second language. All the mentioned websites have quite different approach, quality and content, so the list cannot be ranked in any way. (more…)
Writing about oneself in a personal statement can be incredibly challenging. We are taught from a young age to underplay our achievements, affect modesty when we have excelled and not to boast about good grades or awards. Then, all of a sudden, in order to gain entry to college or secure a great job, we must do a quick about-turn, and talk ourselves up to get the admissions board salivating over our application! Along with the usual tips and tricks, it can be valuable to get in the right mindset for your application and remind yourself of the many reasons you're passionate about your chosen topic. What better way to get motivated than to read about the accomplishments of some of the most inspiring minds of our time? (more…)
We live in a world where students don't have an exact perspective on the working industry and how they are supposed to manage in this new part of their lives that is about to come. Some young adults still think that grades are enough to get a great job and start your professional careers, but the reality is that you need much more to actually get started, from practical experiences to extra-curricular activities and even hobbies. (more…)
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|More Than Human
|Episode Information
|Ningen Ijō
|Air Date
| February 12th, 2015 (Japan)
February 20th, 2016 (United States), February 27th, 2016 (United States)
|Adapted Chapters
| Chapter 47
(Pages 20-34)
Chapter 48
(Pages 2-42)
Chapter 49
(Pages 2-11, 16-32)
|Opening Song
|Let Me Hear
|Ending Song
|It's The Right Time (2nd Version)
|Episode Credits
|Episode Direction
|Yamashiro Chie
|Sayama Kiyoko
|Yonemura Shouji
|Animation Direction
|Sakurai Kunihiko
|Episode Chronology
|← Episode 17
|Episode 19 →
More Than Human (人間以上, Ningen Ijō) is the 18th episode of the Parasyte -the maxim- (寄生獣 セイの格率 Kiseijū Sei no Kakuritsu), anime series.
Because of her decision not fight back, which allowed the police to kill her, Reiko gives her baby to Shinichi before she died. This caused Shinchi to have flashbacks of his own mother and of everything he's been through. Murano, looking on, saw him and asked "If he was back", Shinichi who was finally crying, replied "My tears are". Detective Hirama, takes Shinichi in for interrogation, it's there that Shinichi must be screened. Uragami, the man doing the screening, is able to sense parasite and can sense something in Shinichi.
Tamura reveals Parasites can indeed survive without cannibalizing humans, theorizing that both species belong to the same "family". The detectives arrive on scene and open fire on Tamura, who does not retaliate, but chooses to protect her baby. She slowly staggers toward Shinichi, pleading him in earnest to listen to what she has to say.
Shinichi imagines Tamura to have Nobuko's face, and the detectives stop firing when she gets too close to him. She leaves her son in Shinichi's care, wanting him to lead a normal human life. After she notes the pleasant sensation of imitating human laughter in the past, she dies. The pain and loss Shinichi had experienced catches up to him as he realizes Tamura's sacrifice for her child, and he finally is able to cry.
Murano hears the now crying baby and follows the sound to the scene, welcoming Shinichi back. Shinichi is taken to a testing facility where Uragami is forced to identify whether a number of individuals have the Parasite-sensing ability or are a Parasite themselves.
The episode ends with Uragami detecting something in Shinichi, and the police telling the latter to make eye contact.
- Shinichi Izumi
- Migi
- Satomi Murano
- Reiko Tamura and her child
- Hirama
- Mita
- Katsumata
- Akiho Suzuki
- Yuko Tachikawa
- Kazuyuki Izumi
- Miyake
- Sato
- Uragami
- Fukami
- Nakagawa
- Nobuko Izumi (Flashback)
- Kana Kimishima (Flashback)
- Gotou (Mentioned)
- Takeshi Hirokawa (Mentioned)
- The title of this episode is from literary work "More Than Human", along with all the episode titles, are from famous literary works.
|Parasyte -the maxim-
|List of Episodes
|1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24


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OZMin says first copper from Carrapateena in 2019
OZ Minerals (ASX:OZL) is betting big on copper with plans to begin mining ore at its Carrapateena underground mine by 2019.
In a statement released on Friday, Australia's third-largest copper producer said it aims for output three years from now under a revised AUD$975 million construction plan – a far cry from the original plans back in 2014 for a project valued up to AUD $3 billion. The mine would produce around 67,000 tonnes of copper and 76,000 ounces of gold annually in its first three years.
The Australian reports Oz Minerals saying it plans to mine four million tonnes per annum, with copper concentrate coming in 2019. The overall spend includes a $150 million concentrate treatment plant at Whyalla, plus infrastructure and port options. The company is in discussions with Arrium Ltd., the owner of the port town's steelworks.
The project has been downgraded significantly from 2014, when a prefeasibility study had the mine, located 130 kilometres north of Port Augusta in South Australia and 100 kilometres south-east of BHP Billiton's copper-uranium Olympic Dam mine, producing revenues of more than $22 billion over its life at production costs of just $0.49 a pound of copper.
"We have reviewed in detail numerous copper-gold projects around the world over the past five years and there are very few like Carrapateena which offer the potential of multi-decade production at low operating costs," OZ Minerals' former CEO Terry Burgess said at the time.
Australia's largest undeveloped copper deposit is estimated to contain 6.3 million tons of copper and 8.4 million ounces of gold, according to company filings.
The company almost sold Carrapateena back in April 2014, when OZ Minerals was courting interested buyers, having been hit by writedowns and production cuts, Bloomberg said.
However current CEO Andrew Cole was touting the strength of the company in the statement on Friday, noting that with "such strong financial metrics," the company decided to start work and accelerate the prefeasibility, he said via Bloomberg.
In its full-year financials released in February, OZ Minerals reported a record year of production, bolstered by its 100,000 tonnes of copper per year flagship operation at Prominent Hill – generating a 168 percent increase in profits for 2015 and EBITDA of $484.9 million.
The news comes as copper begins another bearish trend, with the red metal plunging 6.7 percent last week, wiping out year-to-date gains entirely.
Growing demand from China – responsible for 46% of the global trade in the metal – is crucial for the copper market which is set to experience another year of oversupply albeit smaller than 2015's 350,000+ tonnes surplus which was the largest in several years. Primary mine supply grew more than 3% last year to just over 19 million tonnes.
The supply overhangs contrasts with a new report by London-based CRU, an independent mining, metals and fertilizer researcher, released last week, which paints a brighter picture of industry fundamentals and the copper price for the rest of the decade.


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Even though the holidays are behind us, there's still another couple of months of winter for most people (just not us Floridians). This past year has been a phenomenal year for my fellow nerds – between new movie releases, video games, and shows, it's never been a better time to be a nerd. To help us show off our nerd style and pride, I've compiled the best 30 nerdy winter apparel finds.
This Direwolf scarf made from mohair is not only insanely cute, but will keep you comfy and warm (and maybe even protect you from the Lannisters) during the winter.
While Jon Snow may know nothing, you'll know how to stay warm and in style with this Jon Snow pullover hoodie.
This Black Velvet Kitty Cloak is whimsical and purrfect for any cat lover.
How amazing are these Fingerless Gloves Cat Mittens? The peek-a-boo kitty makes them fun while still keeping your hands warm.
This double-sided Doctor Who knit scarf in black and blue would wow any Whovian.
Like gloves for your legs, these Dr. Who Tardis Boot Cuffs keep your legs warm and pretty at the same time.
Your days at the academy will get a lot cozier with these fluffy Star Fleet earmuffs.
This may be the funniest hoodie I've ever seen. Live long and prosper as you unzip this Star Trek Mr. Spock Zippered Hoodie.
I don't think I've ever put Star Wars and camouflage in the same sentence, but this Chewbacca camouflage sweater combines the look perfectly.
Every Leia fan can now rock her iconic buns with this Princess Leia Knit Beanie.
No longer do you have to choose between Team Unicorn or Narwhal with this awesome Team Magic Sweater.
Enchant those around you while rocking this amazing Pink Unicorn Horn Beanie.
These Iron Man Fingerless Gloves not only keep your hands warm, but the repulsor glows in the dark!
Bow down and join Loki's army in this Loki's Army Sweatshirt.
Nothing says I'm ready to snuggle up quite like this Terminus BBQ Sweatshirt.
The walkers outside are frightful, but this Walking Dead Infinity Scarf is delightful.
I just can't even with how cute these are. How adorable to have a tiny fox peaking out of the top of your boots with these Fox Boot Socks.
A cruel-free way to wear a fox in this Black and White Polka Dot Fox Cardigan.
Represent your house colors with this Harry Potter Scarf.
Write and send a message via owl with these Great Horned Owl Fingerless Mittens.
This Harley Quinn Zipper Hoodie is mischievous and fun with its white pom poms and diamond-shaped pockets.
Let out your inner Wonder Woman while keeping your ears warm with this Wonder Woman Knitted Crown and Wrist Cuffs.
These Wolf Leggings are made for wearing with boots and a long, cozy sweater.
Cuddle up and howl at the moon in this Fuzzy Wolf Cowl and Hat.
Embrace your inner elvish warrior in this stunning Hooded Green Capelet.
Who needs to wear shoes when you've got furry Hobbit Slipper Socks to keep your feet warm.
When you walk down the street in a hat like this, people will know you're not afraid of anything.
Aim to misbehave in this Firefly Slouchy Sweatshirt.
I was cold once. It was awful. This Grumpy Cat Fleece Hat will prevent your head from getting cold and keep you looking grumpy.
Who wouldn't need this Grumpy Cat Hoodie after the holidays end?
Hope you found something you liked! Stay warm and keep it nerdy.


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I promise to also share a few pictures of the Bride and Groom and photos of wedding decor at both venues. In the meantime, I'm kicking off the series with a DIY Rustic Wedding Card Caddy that I made for guests to leave their congratulatory wedding messages.
DIY Rustic Wedding Card Caddy
I made this Wedding Card Caddy back in June at the same time I built several Antique Chair Spindle Garden Tool Caddies. In that post, I share a step-by-step tutorial on how to make them.
Because of it's a much larger size, the handle on this one is made from an Antique Chair Leg rather than a spindle.
This caddy also has a hinged lid with a slot for inserting the wedding cards. It was cut using a jigsaw with a piece of wood clamped to the work table as a guide for cutting a straight line (as seen in the photo below).
The slot and outer edge of the lid were finished using a Router with a quarter round bit.
Now that the caddy is assembled, it was stained naturally with a homemade aging solution. To see how to do it visit my How To Age New Wood With Stuff Found In Your Pantry tutorial.
After it dried overnight I gave the entire caddy a whitewash with Simplicity White chalk paint.
I tried finding a small heart-shaped lock to secure the lid during the reception but unfortunately, couldn't get one shipped in time for the wedding. To improvise I simply glued a faux clay heart lock from Michaels onto the front of a small padlock with E6000 glue. I tied a pretty white ribbon onto the key and gave it to the bride and groom for safekeeping.
In PicMonkey I created a graphic with the Bride and Groom's names and wedding date and printed it in reverse (mirror image) on glossy paper using an Inkjet printer. I held the paper front and center onto the caddy and with the back of a spoon, rubbed the graphic onto the wood.
Two things we used a lot of in the wedding decor was burlap, wood, and white lace. I cut some pretty burlap and lace circles from a Vintage Country scrapbook paper booklet that I had on hand. With mini clothespins, I attached cute wooden letters to the front of the paper circles to spell the word CARDS and hung them with twine from the chair leg handle.
The box was built so that the lid can be easily removed after the cards have been read. The bride and groom can repurpose this caddy as a wooden plant box or keep it for storing wedding mementos.
I also shared our DIY Rustic Wooden Centerpiece Boxes made for each table, DIY Rustic Wedding Cupcake Stand, and DIY Wedding Centerpiece Trivets and Bride & Groom Flower Pots.
You'll find this project linked up at these PARTIES.


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Banksy, Buff Monster, Lepos & The Sucklord – New Arrivals
New Artist Collectible Toys, Stickers, Books & More
A Banksy Film
EXIT THROUGH THE GIFT SHOP is a chaotic study of low-level criminality, comradeship, and incompetence. By turns shocking, hilarious and absurd, this is an enthralling modern-day fairytale… with bolt cutters.
This is the inside story of Street Art-a brutal and revealing account of what happens when fame, money, and vandalism collide. EXIT THROUGH THE GIFT SHOP follows an eccentric shopkeeper turned amateur filmmaker as he attempts to capture many of the world's most infamous vandals on camera, only to have famed British stencil artist Banksy turn the camcorder back on its owner in one of the most provocative films about art ever made. $30
BANKSY: Locations & Tours
A Collection of Graffiti Locations and Photographs in London, England
by Martin Bull
When it comes to art, London is best known for its galleries, not its graffiti. However, not if photographer Martin Bull has anything to say about it. While newspapers and magazines the world over send their critics to review the latest Damien Hirst show at the Tate Modern, Bull, in turn, is out taking photos of the latest street installations by guerilla art icon Banksy. In three guided tours, Martin Bull documents sixty-five London sites where one can see some of the most important works by the legendary political artist. Boasting over 100 color photos, Banksy Locations and Tours also includes graffiti by many of Banksy's peers, including Eine, Faile, El Chivo, Arofish, Cept, Space Invader, Blek Le Rat, D*face, and Shepherd Fairey. The US edition has locations updated, plus 25 additional photos.
176 pages. Cover Price $20
BANKSY: Locations & Tours Volume 2
A Collection of Graffiti Locations and Photographs from Around the UK
by Martin Bull
This unique and unashamedly DIY book follows the runaway success of Banksy Locations and Tours Vol.1 by rounding up the rest of Banksy's UK graffiti from the last five years. It includes over 100 different locations and 200 color photographs of Banksy's street art; information, random facts, and idle chit-chat on each location; a full walking tour of his remaining work in Bristol, England; and snippets of graffiti by several other artists.
Visit the locations in-person, or get your slippers on and settle back for an open-top bus ride though some of Banksy's best public work.
5 x 7. 180 pages. Cover Price $20
Buff Monster – Recent Drawings Zine
"This is the first zine I've done in about 10 years, (and the first Buff Monster zine). It's a collection of ink drawings from my London show, drawings for prints, pencil drawings I did in Rome, some Illustrator graphics and other random things."
Black and white, photocopied, 28 pages + cover. Each one comes with stickers.
Dimensions: 5.25 x 8.25 $5
Buff Monster 2011 Sticker Pack
An updated version of the classic and essential Buff Monster sticker pack.
This one is almost 100% new. It features a new header card with 8 new
sticker and 5 new button designs.
Each pack includes 11 stickers and 1 button. $10
Lepos Bible
by Diego Bergia
The LEPOS Bible follows Diego Bergia's worldwide street art project that began in 2004. The 66 page pocket sized book is packed with street photos, testimonials, writings, comics, sketches and jail stories. Also included is a detailed documentation of the making of the LEPOS arcade game, a video game demo that would have taken over the world if it was ever made. With a forward by street art aficionados the Wooster Collective, this book shines a light on how and what it takes to single-handedly create a viral marketing campaign.
Cover Price $10
DIY Mini Dumpsters
TYOTOYS are proudly made in North America from 30% recycled materials. A perfect desktop organizer for graff heads and other delinquents.
TYO Waste Mgmt and warning kiss-cut stickers included. 4″ x 4″ x 4″ cube.
Desktop organizer holds pens, markers, tools, etc… $14
The Ringmeister
The Ringmeister is an uptight showman– a ponderous, preposterous, perverted, pompous windbag.
Born Reginald Frothingham III, this aristocratic arse became bored with the usual debauchery found in his high-society circles.
So he set off to scour the world for the finest circus performers money could buy. Well this would be true, except you'd have to replace the word "planet" with "immediate neighborhood", and the word "money" with "expired carwash coupons".
Nobody is quite sure where his best-est buddy "meester" came from, but we think he was somehow surgically removed from the Ringmeister. And possibly stepped on.
Approx. 4.5″ tall. Resin. Created by James Hakola. $13
Flingo The Filthy Monkey
Flingo is a rare Kaka-poochin monkey from the Dudu hills of Peru. As a baby, he was smuggled into the country in a jock strap, and I think he's still bitter about it. Wouldn't you be?
He shows his contempt by pelting the good folks with his favorite ammunition– pure Flingo. His aim is exceptional, he can knock a peanut out of a fat kid's teeth from 30 yards. He doesn't show any pity, and he doesn't take any crap– although he gives plenty.
Of course his favorite target is the Ringmeister. He just loves to "stick it to the man" (literally). For as the Zen proverb goes…. a man without knees cannot duck.
Approx. 4.5″ tall. Resin. Created by James Hakola. $13
Snockers The Drunk-Ast Clown
Once Snockers was a bright and happy clown, with just the right combination of juggling, pratfalls, and ethnic slurs. One day he auditioned for the role of spokesclown at the seventh largest burger chain in the southeast. But sadly, he forgot to lay off the liquor.
His high-octane breath was touched off by a lit chargrill in the studio… and the place went up in a mighty fireball.
Once the flames were extinguished, the smoke cleared, and the dead buried, Snockers learned he was passed over for the job, which instead went to his arch-nemesis Froze-O the Clown.
Realizing the peak of his career would be a shoe dye commercial from 1983, this drunk-ast bastard has sunk into the bottle like never before.
Approx. 4.5″ tall. Resin. Created by James Hakola. $13
Ellaphat The Portly Pachyderm
Ellaphat has a bit of a weight problem. Try not to stare, point, laugh, or look directly at him. If you make him upset you'll be sorry.
"Big L" joined the circus a few years ago. Actually, the circus joined him. They found him at an abandoned car dealership, too friggin' fat to leave after the place closed up. The ringmeister, in his thriftiness, just staked a tend over him and set up the circus right there.
Ellaphat doesn't really do much except complain about liberals and welfare, watch daytime trash TV, and eat Bucky Yuck's Brand Fried P-Nutz.
Unfortunately, the expense of feeding this mastodon pretty much wipes out any profits for the year.
Approx. 3.5″ tall. Resin. Created by James Hakola. $13
Trini Trapeezee Siren of the Swing
Whenever you go to the circus, you'll see all the guys crowding around Trini's ring. Ms. Trapeezee is in many ways the real star of the circus, being a superb aerial acrobat, and the only member with any real bankable talent. She can do things on that swing that, uh… well nevermind.
She came from somewhere behind the dreaded "Iron Curtain". When she met the Ringmeister, he promised to take her away with the circus. Of course she thought he meant "The" circus. You know the one I mean. But instead it was just "a" circus, and not even one that was decent. Or safe. Or licensed. Poor Trini.
Someone said she might have a slight thing for the boss' pal "Meester".
Approx. 4.5″ tall. Resin. Created by James Hakola. $13
Suckadelic Catalog
SUCKADELIC was a recent exhibit at pop-up / parasite gallery Boo-Hooray, which ran Jan 11-23 and was curated by Johan Kugelberg and Simeon Lipman. Get the 100 page exhibition catalog! Numbered out of 500. $25
Bumble & Tweet: BUMBLE (Candy Edition)
Bumble & Tweet: TWEET (Candy Edition)
The Birds and The Bees! STRANGEco is proud to introduce Bumble and Tweet, a pair of sweet and stunning figures by artist Julie West. Bumble and Tweet each wear nest-bonnets and come with a collection of either bee or bird friends.
Released in 2008, TWEET features a bird's nest bonnet and two magnetic birds. This special Candy edition is a cotton candy pink color, be sure to check out Tweet's candy-colored friend BUMBLE, too!
Rotocast vinyl, 6 inches tall. Special tube packaging.
Removable nest bonnet and two magnetic birds
$25 each
Bumble & Tweet: BUMBLE (Spring edition)
Bumble & Tweet: TWEET (Spring edition)
The Birds and The Bees STRANGEco is proud to introduce Bumble and Tweet, a pair of sweet and stunning figures by artist Julie West. Bumble and Tweet each wear nest-bonnets and come with a collection of either bee or bird friends.
Released in 2008, TWEET features a bird's nest bonnet and two magnetic birds. This special Spring edition is as beautiful as a fresh day in May. Be sure to check out Tweet's Spring-fresh friend BUMBLE, too!
Rotocast vinyl, 6 inches tall. Special tube packaging. Removable nest bonnet and 2 magnetic birds.
$25 each
Bumble & Tweet: BUMBLE (Tree Edition)
Bumble & Tweet: TWEET (Tree edition)
The Birds and The Bees!
STRANGEco presents Bumble and Tweet, a pair of sweet and stunning figures by artist Julie West. Bumble and Tweet each wear nest-bonnets and come with a collection of either bee or bird friends. This LIMITED EDITION version features a special tree pattern.
Released in 2008, TWEET features a bird's nest bonnet and two magnetic birds. Be sure to check out Tweet's woodland friend BUMBLE, too!
Rotocast vinyl, 6 inches tall. Special tube packaging. Removable nest bonnet and two magnetic bees. Special Edition Tree Pattern
$25 each


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Lawmakers in the District of Columbia and Virginia are working together on legislation that would affect how child abuse and neglect cases are handled. This comes on the heels of the many reports of sex abuse by Catholic Church clergy members in states throughout the country, including Pennsylvania.
The proposed law would require clergy members to report the abuse, expanding their legal responsibility by making them mandatory reporters. Though the topic is open to debate from religious liberty and child protection advocates, it may face less opposition because of the recent scandals. It is currently being reviewed by a D.C. Attorney General, and its final version may be introduced to the D.C. Council early this year.
The bill is in its early stages, but one of its main goals is to make confidential discussions by clergy members non-exempt. This includes those that took place in church confession booths. It would also be expanded to include discussions about a child that the clergy member did not know, and conversations about past abuse. Furthermore, the bill would mandate that the clergy members share the alleged abuse with their institutions by informing its board members. This could make the churches liable as well.
In addition, the bill suggests increased penalties for individuals who fail to report abuse. It also recommends that clergy members be trained about the stipulations of being a mandatory reporter. Local faith organizations have been voicing support, but Catholic Church members are concerned about the confessional, which is sacred to them. Some argue that making it non-exempt may affect religious liberty. In point, they feel that both the abused and abusers may not share their stories if they fear retaliation or criminal prosecution.
There are 28 states, including Pennsylvania, that require clergy members to be mandatory reporters. The specifics for this vary by state, and some may not protect confidential conversations. This could start to change with the proposal and continuing sex abuse scandals.
A member of the Jewish Community Relations Council of Greater Washington commented on the topic of privileged conversations between religious leaders and congregation members. He said that finding the right balance between confidentiality and obtaining justice for victims was not an easy task. He added that his community supported the legislation, and that most religious groups agreed.
With more sexual abuse victims speaking out, the power and reputation of religious institutions have come into question. Legislators are trying to work with these organizations to preserve their traditions while protecting the rights of their members. The road ahead may be difficult, but it seems as though the time has come to make some effective changes.
Although progress has been made, there are still cases of past and present sexual abuse and mistreatment by clergy members. If you are a survivor of sexual abuse, you do not have to face this alone. Call an experienced Scranton clergy abuse lawyer at Williams Cedar today. Contact us at 215-557-0099 or complete an online form to arrange a free consultation. With offices in Philadelphia and Haddonfield, New Jersey, we represent clients throughout Allentown, Scranton, Pittsburgh, Harrisburg, Greensburg, Johnstown, Eerie, and Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania.


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Optional Toppings: (included in macros)
In a small bowl, mix Angel Food Cake protein, Bananas Foster Flex Flavors, water and cinnamon to make a pudding. Add brown rice to protein pudding and stir until well combined. Garnish with sliced banana and chocolate chips and enjoy!
Makes 1 serving
Macros: Cal: 280 // Fat: 4 g // Sat Fat: 2.5 g // Carbs: 40 g // Net Carbs:// 33 g // Fiber: 7 g // Pro: 23 g // Sugar: 7 g


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is a modern renaissance man living in Hollywood, CA! In addition to being a regular guest at San Diego Comic Con International and a comic book artist for Universal Studios, Moore was recently promoted to Senior Editor of Edibles Magazine, California's leading journal on creative and alternative presentations of medically infused consumables.
An active member of LA's improv community, Moore recently starred as a regular on Black Spider-Man and is the founder of the "Comic Book Live" improv troupe in Hollywood. Patrick is also a regular sight at the biggest comic book events on the West Coast as a celebrity interviewer for Geek Speak TV.
In addition to his performing chops in movies such as SOUP and THE DAY THE EARTH STOPPED, Comic Book fans will know him as the penciler and writer of "Vampyre: Castle of the Undead", the very first comic book published by Universal Studios (recently added to the latest edition of the Fogel's Underground Price Guide). Welcome back to the show, Patrick!
- Company:Comic Book Live! (Hollywood,CA)
July 9, 2017, 16:00
VA COMICON CASH COSTUME CONTEST(in the theater) !VA Comicon at VCU July 8-9, 2017!
July 8, 2017, 19:00
After-Con Party with mc chris (separate admission) 7p-Midnight!VA Comicon at VCU July 8-9, 2017!
July 8, 2017, 10:00
Summer Show Opens to VIPs!VA Comicon at VCU July 8-9, 2017!


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Tip Jar
The song describes a relationship that was unhealthy and painful. The 'singer' is lamenting the time spent trying to overcome insurmountable obstacles with this person. He is at the point where he wishes he could feel more about it, but the person in question has made it easy for him to move on by being so selfish.
What if the person being left behind refuses to be the victim?
You Made It Easy
Verse 1
You only wanted to be loved just so you wouldn't be alone
I always thought that we'd be more, looks like we won't
You just gave me your worst, did you think that I'd be hurt?
When you walked out the door, I wish that I felt more, but
You made it easy to let you to go
You made it easy
So don't tell me it will be painful for me when you're gone
When you ripped us apart, it should have broke my heart
But I'm movin' on and you made it easy
You made it easy
Verse 2
I've never been someone who puts my life on hold
I wasted precious time on you, tryin' to break through your walls
You never really cared; you were never even really there
Now you're gone for good, but I'm not crying like I should, cause...
Oooohooohooh I'm finally free
from you ooh ooh ooh won't get the best of me
You were hard love, but
Song Length4:04
GenresPop - General, Pop - Easy Listening
Tempo / FeelVery Slow (Under 70)
Lead VocalFemale Vocal
Moods Heartbreaking, Furious
Subject Matter
Breaking Up, Heartbreak
Similar Artists
Alicia Keys, Christina Aguilera
2000 and later
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Posts Tagged 'Right Speech'
I once took a management seminar in which the facilitator was discussing how to deal with the ubiquitous "How are you?" in the work place. We all know that the person asking has simply expanded, "Hello", and they don't really want to know how you're doing unless the answer is, "Great! That project proposal you need is all set." or "Great! I just scored tickets to the Superbowl!" They don't want to know anything else — they're busy with their own angst-ridden day. The only folks who may really want to hear your true answer when they ask are your girlfriends, buddies or loving family members … So how do you answer your coworker when your day isn't great and still practice Right Speech … In other words, not be a liar? Read the rest of this entry »


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Website hosting is one of those things you probably know you need but don't exactly know why. Kind of like a modern-day Tickle Me Elmo, albeit with less red fur and incessant cackling. Without hosting, your website simply wouldn't be visible to the world.
But before diving into the basics of website hosting, it's important to first understand how websites are displayed.
How Displaying a Website Works
Every website is made up of a collection of files. Some of these files dictate the look of your site. Others make your website function in a certain way. Still, others include the images that load on your website.
These files are stored in folders, much like a collection of Word documents on your computer. When someone types your website address into their browser, your computer sends a request for these files as well as other pieces of information required to load your site. Once your computer has all of the files and info associated with your website, it reads them and displays your website in the way you've specified.
What Is Hosting?
Hosting refers to the space these website files and pieces of information are stored. All of these files are stored on a computer (called a server) somewhere around the world. When we talk about hosting, we're simply referring to the server that houses all of your website files and info.
Further Technical Considerations
Like most things in the tech world, hosting can get pretty complex and outright geeky. But here are a few of the most common technical considerations, explained in plain English.
Disk Space
Disk space refers to the amount of room allotted for all of your website files. Just like you've probably experienced with your computer's hard drive, your hosting may have a specified amount of disk space available for you to use. However, most websites are surprisingly small.
As a point of reference, we've developed a number of sites that take up under 100 megabytes (1/10 of one gigabyte) and our own site takes up a little under 500 megabytes at the time of this writing.
Unless you have a behemoth of a site, most hosting plans will offer more than enough disk space.
Bandwidth is the amount of data your server allows you to transfer over a specified period of time. Whenever a visitor is sending or receiving data from your server, that falls under your allotted bandwidth. Typically bandwidth limits are outlined as a certain amount of data transferred per month.
I actually think it's easier to understand via an example. Let's say for a visitor to collect all of the necessary files to display your homepage they need to gather 1 megabyte of data from your server. If 100 unique visitors hit your homepage in a month, that will require you to have a transfer limit above 100 megabytes per month.
Bandwidth also includes uploading files to your server. So if users are submitting photos via your website, these uploads will count against your bandwidth limit as well.
It's best to discuss bandwidth with your hosting provider and monitor your monthly bandwidth usage to determine the amount that's right for your website.
Sharing Hosting Space with Other Websites
As the name implies, a shared hosting space means you are sharing your server and its resources (such as disk space, ram and processor) with other websites. It's definitely worth asking your hosting provider if you're on a shared hosting plan. If you are, it'll likely be cheaper, but you'll be sharing a server with other websites, which puts you at risk.
If your server neighbors engage in any unsavory practices such as spamming people or their website is hacked, you could get dragged down with them. Even if your neighbors are upstanding citizens, you could still run into performance problems. Since you are sharing resources, if their site gets an influx of traffic (and thus requires more resources), your website could significantly slow down.
If consistent performance is crucial to your website, talk to your hosting provider about these concerns and ask what alternatives they offer to shared hosting environments.
Managed vs. Unmanaged Plans
A managed hosting plan means that someone is maintaining the hardware and software on your server, installing security and performance updates as they're released. As stands to reason, an unmanaged plan means you're running the show and are left to optimize and update your server settings yourself.
Unless you're into server administration (in which case you probably aren't still reading this article), you probably want to go for a managed hosting plan.
There's a lot more technical stuff that goes into hosting, but we'll spare you. Hopefully, this post helps clarify how websites are displayed and what website hosting actually is. If you have any further questions, please let us know in the comments below. And if you'd rather not worry about hosting at all, be sure to check out our all-inclusive website platform for nonprofits!


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Constance Guisset
French Designer of many interests, she founded her firm in 2009, specializing in product design, interior design and set design. She collaborates on a regular basis with important furniture manufacturing companies such as Petite Friture, Moustache, Tectona, LaCie, Molteni&C, La Cividina, ZaoZuo. Guisset has designed the set of different prestigious plays and exhibitions at the MAD-Musée des Arts Décoratifs and at the Musée du Quai Branly in Paris. In the past Guisset exhibited at the Chapelle des Calvairiennes, the Centre d'Art Contemporain du Pays de Mayenne, the Mudac of Lausanne, the Museum Fabre of Montpellier and recently at the MAD-Musée des Arts Décoratifs of Paris.


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Location: SilverCity
Show times: 6:30 & 8:30 pm
Director: Michael Pearce
Cast: Jessie Buckley, Johnny Flynn, Geraldine James
Runtime: 107 minutes
Language: English
Rating: 14A
Toronto Film Festival Nomination: Platform Award; Miami Film Festival Nomination: Best Screenplay; London Film Festival Nomination: First Feature
"There is nothing more enjoyable than a film that shatters your expectations, turning a confident hunch about what's coming next into smithereens of doubt. The British thriller "Beast" does it strikingly well."—Colin Covert, Minneapolis Star-Tribune
In Disney's Beauty and the Beast, the identity of the Beast is never in any doubt. But in Beast, writer/director Michael Pearce's powerful debut feature, that one-word title leaves room for debate. Just who is this Beast?
The story is set on Jersey, a channel island with a population of about 100,000. The chief suspect is Pascal Renouf (Johnny Flynn), a dark anti-hero of the Wuthering Heights variety. The police think he might be behind a recent spate of murders, but the first time we meet him, he's rescuing a young woman named Moll (Jessie Buckley) from an impulsive first date that's about to become an assault.
Moll's attraction to Pascal is problematical. She may have started from a sense of obligation. She may be keeping it up just to annoy her family, especially her icy, imperious mother (Geraldine James), or because no one else is willing to give this rough guy a break. Whatever her reasons, she definitely exists inside her own troubled bubble. She drinks, sometimes wanders, suffers nightmares – and there's nothing normal about the way she eats cake.
But Pearce cleverly steers us into this dark drama Moll-first. She may be just as bleak and tormented as her beau, but because she talks more and is surrounded by family, we feel we know her better. Pascal is a poacher with a police record, which is difficult to spin as anything other than a negative.
Ireland's Buckley delivers a disturbing yet measured performance, with Flynn providing the perfect counterpoint. Who is the Beast? Perhaps it's the prurient viewer who decides to brave this twisted tale. Beast is a thrill ride, a plunge into darkness that feels like it may never pull up.


text: Mindful Experience is an event held by Mad4U that provides calming experiences for students in preparation for exam week. Team member, Rachel Wu and team lead, Allison Shinsky were tasked with rebranding this event in a way that is more vibrant and energetic. Overall the design implementation took around three weeks.


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Don't try this at home kids 😛
Millions of tourist visit this beautiful town every year with only one goal – the famous coffeeshops of Amsterdam. Seems like I'm one of the few people with almost zero experience when it comes to cannabis and a few weeks ago I decided to give it a go.
Sometimes I feel bad about it as I know for many of you marijuana is illegal while I just need to walk down my road for about 30 seconds to reach the next coffeeshop. Luckily more and more countries prescribe cannabis or medical marijuana and with MS you are one of the lucky qualifiers ( hey, there need to be some perks after all). In case you wonder and are not familiar with it, marijuana is really good for us living with MS, especially it's compounds THC and CBD look very promising in studies. Don't worry, I didn't and won't turn into a pothead and you actually see very few in the coffeeshops, the customers are of all ages, professions and backgrounds once you leave the center and its very famous coffeeshops where you'll find most tourists.
A few weeks ago I decided to give it a try and got myself a pre-rolled joint at the coffeeshop down the street – many years ago I tried to roll one and it looked like a ball, not even close to joint. The moment we lit it, it burned down within seconds. So the pre-rolled option comes in very handy for not origami gifted people like me. I smoked it with a friend at my place and it was a fun eve involving lots of giggles and a 4 hour long painting session, I slept like a baby for the first time in ages.
After discussing with two very experienced friends ( you know who you are 😉 ) I decided to try and eat it rather than smoke as it must be healthier and more efficient for the healing compounds. You can dissolve cannabis in coconut oil, butter, cook with it, bake with it – you name it. Said and done, I walked back to my local coffeeshop and got myself a little "special"muffin. I had a bite that same night and felt great, super relaxed, giggles, slept again like a baby. Had another bite the next eve and the same results.
Yay, maybe this is working for me.
BUT THEN, one day…
I got this big and beautiful muffin for my 4 year MS diagnosis anniversary.
So pretty, isn't it? The day I got it I visited my experienced friends and they introduced me to vaping, had some organic cannabis and these cuties even prepared a yummy dinner that contained a bit of marijuana. Thank you again for the great day you two 🙂
I didn't feel high at any point, just relaxed and that is a feeling I honestly forgot. I'm always on the edge, even when I think I'm relaxed. So experiencing that feeling again was shocking and wonderful at the same time.
The next day I wanted to repeat my experience and decided to have a tiny bit of that pretty muffin. Just look at that size! I ate the dolphin first (of course) and maybe 1/10 of the muffin. I even went for a quick walk with my dog and did groceries afterwards. It all started on the way back, something wasn't quite right, lol.
10 mins later, all hell broke loose, totally unexpected! I have just sat down, finished dinner and watched THE (if you're a fan you know which one) very sad and dramatic episode of Orange Is the New Black ( I think this is the reason why it turned out the way it did) when my heart started racing and I felt kind of panic coming up. FEAR. I tried to ignore it at first but it got worse by the minute.
What do you do in these situations?
Well, I skyped my mum in Germany ( who is super cool btw and supports me with all my crazy ideas and self-experiments) . Unfortunately she has no experience herself and her google results were not very positive. I also started chatting with my dear friend who got me the muffin as I was sure she could help.
Her first advice – don't eat anything. That was unfortunately already too late as I just had dinner. AFTER I had the muffin. Bummer.
Drink water and sit on your balcony was the second advise. Tried that, but things got still worse. I even thought about what would happen if I lose consciousness or if that was a heart attack of some kind, I'm all alone with my dog, nobody would find me for days – at least until Wednesday as this is the day my cleaning lady comes around. But it was only Monday night, help! I even thought about calling an ambulance at one point or just sit outside my door for a while.
Then I freaked out a little more and even considered that I might need to get a boyfriend so I have someone around I could call 24/7 and who would prevent future stupid things I'll do ( and before I get a ton of messages, I know I can call many of you 24/7 but you know me, I wouldn't 😉 ) . HA! 😛 It was that bad! But I felt so lonely and totally helpless, I can't even describe it. After an hour the panic and fear only came in waves, my mum had to leave me on Skype and I decided to join Ruby in her dog bed.
It took another 3 hours until I felt more stable – but it took another 3-4 days until I felt like my old self again. I don't even want to know what would have happened if I ate the ENTIRE muffin – it tasted yummy though, I never have chocolate muffins anymore so it would have been tempting. The next day I told several friends about this horrible experience and, it seems like I'm the last person living in Amsterdam to have had a space muffin ( why did I miss out on the space cake craze, where was I??) , they all made kind of the same experience at one point or another. It also always depends on your mood I learned and that day, thanks to the dramatic death on OITNB, my mood wasn't great. I had no idea a space muffin could do that to you. So be warned if you ever come to town, better smoke/ vape a little 🙂
Well, it's been almost 4 weeks since and I still can't smell marijuana without feeling sick, so that self-experiement is on hold for a while. But not forever.
I mentioned earlier that I'd love to go to an Ayahuasca retreat in Peru – not anymore, EVER! I felt so much fear during these 3 hours after that tiny bite of space muffin that I would just die of fear in the jungle during an ayahuasca session. No, thanks!
I'm sorry that I freaked out some of you as I obviously must have snapchatted and instagramed the incident live – at least I could amuse some of you.
For the ones who missed out this very entertaining event – this is how I woke up that evening, poor Ruby. Poor me. The muffin went into the bin the next morning.


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Handbook of Japanese Syntax
Del av serien
Kort om boken
Om Handbook of Japanese Syntax
Studies of Japanese syntax have played a central role in the long history of Japanese linguistics spanning more than 250 years in Japan and abroad. More recently, Japanese has been among the languages most intensely studied within modern linguistic theories such as Generative Grammar and Cognitive/Functional Linguistics over the past fifty years. This volume presents a comprehensive survey of Japanese syntax from these three research strands, namely studies based on the traditional research methods developed in Japan, those from broader functional perspectives, and those couched in the generative linguistics framework.The twenty-four studies contained in this volume are characterized by a detailed analysis of a grammatical phenomenon with broader implications to general linguistics, making the volume attractive to both specialists of Japanese and those interested in learning about the impact of Japanese syntax to the general study of language. Each chapter is authored by a leading authority on the topic. Broad issues covered include sentence types (declarative, imperative, etc.) and their interactions with grammatical verbal categories (modality, polarity, politeness, etc.), grammatical relations (topic, subject, etc.), transitivity, nominalizations, grammaticalization, word order (subject, scrambling, numeral quantifier, configurationality), case marking (ga/no conversion, morphology and syntax), modification (adjectives, relative clause), and structure and interpretation (modality, negation, prosody, ellipsis). Chapter titles IntroductionChapter 1. Basic structures of sentences and grammatical categories, Yoshio Nitta, Kansai University of Foreign StudiesChapter 2: Transitivity, Wesley Jacobsen, Harvard UniversityChapter 3: Topic and subject, Takashi Masuoka, Kobe City University of Foreign StudiesChapter 4: Toritate: Focusing and defocusing of words, phrases, and clauses, Hisashi Noda,National Institute for Japanese Language and Linguistics Chapter 5: The layered structure of the sentence, Isao Iori, Hitotsubashi UniversityChapter 6. Functional syntax, Ken-Ichi Takami, Gakushuin University; and Susumu Kuno, Harvard UniversityChapter 7: Locative alternation, Seizi Iwata, Osaka City UniversityChapter 8: Nominalizations, Masayoshi Shibatani, Rice UniversityChapter 9: The morphosyntax of grammaticalization, Heiko Narrog, Tohoku UniversityChapter 10: Modality, Nobuko Hasegawa, Kanda University of International StudiesChapter 11: The passive voice, Tomoko Ishizuka, Tama University Chapter 12: Case marking, Hideki Kishimoto, Kobe University Chapter 13: Interfacing syntax with sounds and meanings, Yoshihisa Kitagawa, Indiana University Chapter 14: Subject, Masatoshi Koizumi, Tohoku University Chapter 15: Numeral quantifiers, Shigeru Miyagawa, MITChapter 16: Relative clauses, Yoichi Miyamoto, Osaka UniversityChapter 17: Expressions that contain negation, Nobuaki Nishioka, Kyushu UniversityChapter 18: Ga/No conversion, Masao Ochi, Osaka UniversityChapter 19: Ellipsis, Mamoru Saito, Nanzan University Chapter 20: Syntax and argument structure, Natsuko Tsujimura, Indiana University Chapter 21: Attributive modification, Akira Watanabe, University of TokyoChapter 22: Scrambling, Noriko Yoshimura, Shizuoka Prefectural University


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The Winter/Spring 2019 issue of Nursery Lines magazine is now online. Click here to read about:
- NYSNLA's Career of Choice Summit
- CNLP Day at Draves Arboretum
- A new business partnership
- Legislative issues of interest
- And more!
The magazine is now in flipbook format, so you can read it like a conventional paper magazine right on your computer -- even on your phone! You can also print out the pages to read anywhere.
The full-screen option is recommended for optimum visibility when reading the magazine online. Click the "Fullscreen" link in the center of the page.


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Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Ants in the Potato Salad: Stay-Home-Fatherhood Ain't No Picnic in the Park!
Since my lay-off earlier this month, I have been taking on the responsibilities of a stay-at-home father. I had no earthly idea that this simple(?) duty ranked right up there with other fun and easy occupations such as septic tank waste management, Hell's Angel biker bar bouncer, and Tasmanian Devil wrangler.
Aw, I reckon it ain't quite that bad... at least not during the afternoons. Running to school and daycare to pick up the young'uns is kind of a breezy get-out-of-the-house-into-the-warm-sunshine deal. It's getting the kids up in the morning, fed, dressed, and to their proper places in childhood society that is an entirely different matter.
It starts rather early in the AM. After writing, answering emails, and checking out the various horror discussion boards for a couple of hours, I rouse the household at 6AM on the dot... first my wife, then my oldest daughter, and then the two little 'uns. Hustling Joyce into the shower, I prepare breakfast. It's nothing very elaborate, I assure you. No Iron Chef with matching asbestos apron mans the Kelly kitchen. Usually it consists of Toaster Struddles (or Toaster Screwddles, as Makenna calls them), Pop-Tarts, or frozen pancakes or waffles. The quicker and easier the better. Sometimes I'll get a wild hair and fix instant muffins or a fried egg and bacon sandwich on toast, but normally those time-consuming meals are reserved for the more liesurely weekend.
Since my presence in the morning household has given my wife, Joyce, more liberty, she has taken to leaving around 7AM or a little after. That leaves me to get three kids of various ages and degrees of temperment ready for school and daycare. I had originally intended to keep baby Ryan home with myself during my lay-off, but I'm having to pay full price to keep his spot open in a very demanding and competitive daycare setting, so, heck, I'm taking the little guy. Hope that doesn't make me out to be a mean, ol' Da-Da in your critical eyes.
My oldest daughter, Reilly, is fully capable of getting herself ready at the resourceful age of ten, yet it is she of the bunch that gets screamed at the most during the mad dash for school-readiness. Uh, let me rephrase that... "scream" is a bad word. "Strongly urged with great passion that borders insanity" is more like it. After about six times, a request (Brush your hair! Brush your teeth! Put on your sneakers and not those danged Crocs!) slowly sinks into her head and she becomes motivated. Of course this usually happens two and half minutes before time to leave.
Getting eleven-month-old Ryan and four-year-old Makenna ready is all up to yours truly. If Joyce hasn't laid out their clothes ahead of time, they are likely to show up at school or daycare wearing wrinkled Dora the Explorer t-shirts, camouflauge pants (backwards!), and mismatched socks. I am convinced that an evil sock troll lives in my utility room whose only purpose in the grand scheme of things is to torment Ol' Ron by devouring one sock and leaving the matching one behind. I hope he dies horribly and long-sufferingly of a lint tumor. Anyway, both Ryan and Makenna must go to their respective places clean (or so my wife insists!). This involves the assembly-line washing of faces, armpits, and butts. If it looks clean, I take it as such. I ain't about to go sniffing around to make sure everyone's bodily crevices are minty-fresh.
Then when hair is combed, teeth are brushed, and winter coats are donned, we have to make sure that backpacks (with homework included) are in the car and the kids are properly restrained... using seat belts, of course. Then we're off! I'm backing the Nissan out of the driveway, slinging gravel, scaring squirrels into coronaries and sending every bird in sight South for the winter... and I mean to Antarctica, so furious is my exit from the Kelly property. The school doors open at 7:20 and I usually make it there around that time. Then it's off to daycare another four miles further on. There I kiss Ryan goodbye, pass him to the babyroom worker like a Tennessee Titans quarterback launching a pigskin in the last five seconds of the game, then its back in the car and heading for home. This drive along tranquil and picturesque country roads is always a therapeutic time of day for me; full of numbing relief and an almost dream-like euphoria, with great hopes and expectations for what may be accomplished within the "Ron Time" of 8AM and 1:45 PM. Oh joy and endless rapture!
The funny thing is (and I mean funny strange, not funny humorous) that, prior to my lay-off, Joyce has been doing the entire mad morning ritual by herself... and getting to work on time.
And this includes taking Ryan to daycare first, doubling back to school four miles, then heading onward to her bank job at Carthage eight miles away
I've lately had the strong suspicion that my wife is Wonder Woman. She has just neglected to reveal her true identity to me during these past 18 years of marriage. I knew there was something more to that magic lasso bit than some kinky... uh, well, let's not open that can of worms right now.
Posted by Ronald Kelly at 11:07 AM
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