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A bit of a lazy covering entry for a range of potential cartridges that were meant to have come out for the C64GS.
Back when the C64GS was launched, there was a strong list of support from the likes of Ocean, US Gold, System 3, Domark and more. Only really Ocean were true to their word, with many projected titles falling by the way side.
Already we have more complete entries for Spy Who Loved Me V2, due to extra content, but there are what are thought to be straight conversions to cartridge that never were. Could some of these ever be found in prototype form? Maybe there is extra music or content to be uncovered?
Here is the list of some titles so far, which will grow over time. This initial list is thanks to Ross Sillifant, who found a list in RAZE magazine and various other sources:
- Moonwalker Arcade (US Gold)
- Turbocharge (System 3)
- Putty (System 3)
- Battlechess (Mindscape)
- Ultima VI (Mindscape)
- Crime Does Not Pay (Titus)
- Wild Streets (Titus)
- Greatest Hits (Thalamus)
- Space Rogue (Origin)
- Buggy Ranger (Dinamic)
- Plotting (Ocean)
- Addams Family (Ocean)
- Puzznic (Ocean)
- Hard Drivin' (Domark)
- Venus Flytrap (Gremlin)
- Wrath of the Demon (Readysoft)
- Armalyte 2 (Thalamus)
- Hook (Ocean)
- Barbarian 3 (Palace)
- Golden Axe (Virgin)
- Racing Game construction kit (US Gold) – Using Turbo Outrun engine
- Kick Off 2 (Anco)
- Gazza 2 (Active Minds) – Confirmed nothing started
- Turrican 2 (Rainbow Arts)
- X-Out (Rainbow Arts)
- Spy Who Loved Me (Domark)
- The Games – Winter/Summer edition (Epyx) – Confirmed nothing started
- California Games (Epyx)
- Subbuteo (Electronic Zoo)
- Orcus (Electronic Zoo)
- Prohibition (Infogrames)
- Bubble Ghost (Infogrames)
- Rick Dangerous 2 (Microprose)
- Starglider 2 (Microprose)
- Bloodwych (Mirrorsoft)
- Falcon (Mirrorsoft)
- IK Deluxe (System 3)
- Vendetta (System 3)
- Last Ninja 3 (System 3)
- Battlestorm (Titus)
- Crazy Bikes (Titus)
- Crazy Cars 2 (Titus)
- Dick Tracy (Titus) … thank god that didn't make it…
- Fire and Forget 2 (Titus)
- Wild Streets (Titus)
- Armalyte + Sanxion double pack (Thalamus)
- Hawkeye + Quedex double pack (Thalamus)
- Delta + Hunters Moon double pack (Thalamus)
- Creatures + Summer Camp double pack (Thalamus)
- Snare, Retrograde and Heat Seaker triple pack (Thalamus)
- Pro Tennis Tour 2 (Ubi-Soft)
- B.A.T (Ubi-Soft)
It has been confirmed that Turbocharge (System 3) and Hook (Ocean) had cartridge instructions printed in the released manuals. Both seem to have been constructed in a view to be released on cartridge, but changed at the last minute to just disk and tape. Last Ninja 3 is known to have had prototype cartridges built, and Turbocharge probably did too – all are long lost now.
Many more to add soon. It is very unlikely that many were ever started or got to a prototype phase, but at the very least we will get them documented.
Watch this space!
Contributions: Ross Sillifant, Sean O'Neill


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6 ft. 4 Port USB type 'A' Dongle with 4 USB Stereo sound Devices connected. We will eventually have a rack mounted piece with up to 16 type 'A' USB ports for more audio zones and memory sticks, external hard drives, etc.. We can also make a rack mounted piece with digital audio + Left, Right stereo analog outputs. Also we can use Calrad's new internal Amplifier Zone card's for 4 Zones of stereo audio, see the link below.
Wes Black \ Calrad

subset: commoncrawl


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I think Pietersen deserved the Man of The Match 'coz he played it in extreme pressure.Gayle and Bravo wasn't playing well 'coz they both were out LBW on Dalrymple and Lewis's bowling but given not out.
Kevin Pietersen
Chris Gayle
Dwayne Bravo
I think Pietersen deserved the Man of The Match 'coz he played it in extreme pressure.Gayle and Bravo wasn't playing well 'coz they both were out LBW on Dalrymple and Lewis's bowling but given not out.
Pietersen. He did his job, and won the game for England.
Please voteOriginally Posted by Dravid
Do you think that Dalrymple got Gayle out many times?
I think Gayle got run out.Originally Posted by pietersenrocks
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Going by the poll, Gayle rocks more than Pietersen.
Gayle cuz he also bowled well.
The best test match ever
Chris Gayle is the coolest player around at the moment. The way he just stands there when he gets to 100, is so cool.
Pietersen probably deserved it but Gayle's century and 3 top order wickets were vital. Tough choice really.
The Future of International Cricket - Rohit Sharma, Suresh Raina, Ravi Bopara, Tim Southee, Ross Taylor, Shahriar Nafees, Raqibul Hasan, Salman Butt, JP Duminy
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Ryan ten Doeschate - A Legend in the Making
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His face after he got his third wicket, was the coolest expression ever.Originally Posted by PhoenixFire
Dwayne Bravo - His first century, good support for Gayle, and he needs a vote. After everything that happened he got a bit overlooked
This Weeks Samit Patel Fact - Has been mentioned in 32 of my posts
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RIP Mr Woolmer, We are all poorer for your loss.
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Cottonwood Heights, UTHome Menu
Why become a Cottonwood Heights volunteer?
Have you ever wanted to organize a parade or help out with a community play? Do you love to decorate for Halloween or are Easter egg hunts more your thing?
Cottonwood Heights takes pride in the many residents who volunteer their time to brainstorm together and bring the city's events to life. The mayor and city council feel that residents have a better understanding of the types of events their friends and neighbors want to attend, and input from our citizens has made the city's events stronger and better each year.
We would like to continue to invite residents join in the fun of making city events more community-oriented. In order to move forward, we are in need of volunteers to help out with a wide variety of events and committees. It's a great opportunity to feel connected to our community, gain valuable work experience, learn a new skill and make new friends.
Have you attended an event which you felt could have been better? Do you have a skill or talent that you would love to share with us? You can donate a small amount of your time or devote yourself fully to one or more of our events or committees. It all adds up and makes a difference in keeping our community events alive and strong.
If you are interested in volunteering or have questions, please contact City Events Coordinator Ann Eatchel at email@example.com or 801-550-82256. (A questionnaire will be added later).


text: For adrenaline fans, today is a loaded day. Not only have Assyria Game Studio announced Future Racer, but Artificial Life unveiled their partnership with Red Bull in creation of an official F1 game for the iDevice which comes with a 2-year exclusive-partnership. Nerds who read TMA are likely sucking down the last of their Red Bull now as the morning clock dips toward half-four, but Red Bull are obviously serious about keeping other things up, like speedometres and heart rates. Look for this game in the latter part of 2009 and for further details below:


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Model #CLP-8095
|List Price:
|Our Price:
General Description
We're committed to exceeding your expectations:
- Found it for less? We'll match the price
- 25-Year or Limited Lifetime Warranty
Our customers come first — we guarantee it!
You will have lots of space to keep things organized on this extra-deep industrial metal shelving.
Clipper Industrial Metal Shelving can hold anything from school supplies to computer accessories and beyond. No matter what you choose to put on these shelves, solid sides and backs ensure that nothing falls through the cracks. The Clipper system is comprised of modular metal shelves, so you can get a perfect fit in any space.
State-of-the-art production using special techniques makes this industrial metal shelving extra durable. The high-performance box beam shelves are reinforced by double-flanged sides and lapped and welded shelf corners. Flanges welded to to the underside of each shelf contribute to the incredible strength of this industrial shelving. Choose from a selection of colors and sizes for a fully-coordinated custom fit.
- Manufacturer:
- Penco (Quickship)
- Width:
- 48 in.
- Depth:
- 24 in.
- Height:
- 87 in.
- Weight:
- 135 lbs.
- Green
- GreenGuard Gold
- Shelf Weight Capacity:
- 500 Lbs. Evenly Distributed
- Warranty:
- Limited Lifetime
- Certified Green
- End Kit Required: Make sure to order an end kit for each row of shelving. An end kit is necessary even when ordering a single unit.
- Secure Storage: Closed back and sides ensure that everything stays in place and nothing falls off.
- Perfect Fit: With modular shelves, you can add the perfect number of units for your space.
- Sturdy Shelving: High-performance box beam shelves produced on a state-of-the-art production line.
- Strong Connections: Flanges of box beams are welded to the underside of the shelf on 3" centers.
- Tough Reinforcement: Shelf corners are lapped and welded and sides are double flanged.
- Flexible Design: All shelves are punched on the face and surface to accept accessories.
- Warning: Shelving must be securely bolted to a wall for safety.
- Lifetime Coverage: Our Limited Lifetime Warranty guarantees many years of use and enjoyment.
Product ships from factory within 3 business days or less.
Indoor air quality certified for children and schools
We're committed to exceeding your expectations:
- Found it for less? We'll match the price
- 15-Year or Limited Lifetime Warranty
Our customers come first — we guarantee it!
Shipping & Assembly
- Ships Via:
- Common Carrier
- Leaves Factory In:
- Approximately 3 days
- Assembly:
- Required
- Average Assembly Time:
- 15 minutes
Industrial Metal Shelving - 5 Closed Shelves, 48"x24"x87"H
|List Price:
|Our Price:
Product Family
This product is a part of Clipper Industrial Metal Shelving with Closed Shelves
There are 16 products in the family


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For many small hotels this time of year is "the slowest of the slowest of the slowest ever," said Bob Davis, president and CEO of the Hotel and Lodging Association of Volusia County.
DAYTONA BEACH SHORES — Susan Redfern reclined beside the pool at the Sand Castle Motel here basking in the 72-degree heat earlier this week on a day when the temperature back home in Ontario, Canada, barely reached a high of 45 degrees.
"The sun down here gets us through the winter back home," said Redfern, who's been visiting Daytona Beach Shores with her husband, Peter, for the past nine years.
While the parking lot of the beachside hotel was filled this week with cars bearing Ontario license plates, for many small hotels this time of year is "the slowest of the slowest of the slowest ever," said Bob Davis, president and CEO of the Hotel and Lodging Association of Volusia County.
Hoteliers in Flagler County also say this is a slow time of year for them.
"The first three weeks of December are some of the worst weeks of the year," said Barry Griffin, who has owned the 10-room Whale Watch Motel in Flagler Beach for eight years. "It's not warm enough. It's hard to convince people it's nice at the beach."
The Whale Watch Motel is usually booked from Memorial Day to Labor Day, Griffin said. Lower winter rates attract a few extra visitors from Central Florida, but he said the occupancy rate for his hotel still falls to about 25 percent in early December.
"There's really not a whole lot we can do," he said.
The three weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas especially pose a challenge to small, locally owned hotels looking to fill rooms before snowbirds arrive in early January.
Small hotels that are mostly full during the heavy months between February and August hovered at around 25 percent occupancy last December, according to Mid-Florida Marketing & Research Inc. data.
The Daytona Beach Area Convention and Visitors Bureau hopes the area's holiday events — including an ice skating rink next to the Daytona Beach Bandshell — and a program designed to promote small hotels through its website will help, said Tangela Boyd, a spokesperson for the visitors bureau.
Jeffrey Hentz, the visitors bureau's CEO, said he believes promoting the area via the Internet and through social media could help smaller hotels target and reach potential guests more easily.
But Vic Petrenko, who co-owns the 30-unit Sand Castle Motel with his wife, Lonnie, isn't so sure.
Holiday events might work for hotels closer to Daytona Beach, but his hotel is too far away to reap much of a benefit, Petrenko said.
"I've found there is virtually nothing you can do in the three weeks before Christmas," Petrenko said, noting his hotel's occupancy rate falls from 70 percent in November to 50 percent in December.
"You can drop the (room rental) rates. You can heat the pool. But nothing works," he said. "You could fire a cannon down (South Atlantic Avenue) and not hit a car."
Instead, Petrenko said he saves the money he makes during the tourist-heavy summer months and works to maintain the customer base he's built in the 16 years he's owned the Sand Castle Motel.
Most of the hotel's winter business comes from repeat customers. Petrenko hosts Sunday football cookouts, Halloween parties, Thanksgiving dinners and other events to keep his guests coming back each year.
"We've come down for the past 15 years — always to the same hotel," said Tellie Radvansky, a retired Pittsburgh resident who was staying this week at the Sand Castle Motel with her husband, John.
The Radvanskys have made many friends through the hotel's get-togethers, and that's reason enough to come down each year, John Radvansky said. In fact, the Radvanskys are planning to extend their stay next year to attend the hotel's Halloween party.
"Everybody's from a different country, but they're not strangers," John Radvansky said. "That's the great thing."
Farther north along Atlantic Avenue, bookings are down compared with last year at the Atlantic Ocean Palm Inn in Daytona Beach Shores. Assistant Manager Erica Obrochta thinks Hurricane Sandy might be to blame.
"It's quite slow," said Obrochta, whose father, Stanley, has owned the 49-room hotel since 1998.
"I'm wondering if our guests from the upper East Coast are having trouble getting down here this year," she said. "I think people are scared to travel, or they're just not in a position where they can anymore."
Like Petrenko, the Obrochtas just try to power through December.
"We really try to sell during the good times," Erica Obrochta said. "That's the good thing about being a family business. We really put everything of ourselves into the business."
Bill Bhana, manager of the Grand Prix Motel in Daytona Beach Shores, also wonders where the snowbirds are. The hotel used to get a steady stream of winter visitors from Canada, but that has largely dried up in recent years, he said.
The few visitors he does get are a mixed bag of people visiting their families and travelers just passing through, he said. "I guess the economy tanked so much that they just stopped coming."


text:
Confidence in Suffering
We cannot isolate ourselves fully from others. Our decisions invariably affect other people, and their decisions affect us. The church as a whole may go through trials and tribulations, and when this happens, even the most faithful servants of God ...Read More
Faithful Obedience
In many places around the world, Christians have long had to deal with being a part of the "small and despised" minority. In the West, we find that although many people still profess some form of Christianity, it is increasingly ...Read More
The Days of Prosperity and Adversity
As we grow in faith, we should find ourselves increasingly aware that our hard days are from the Lord no less than our good ones, and we should be thanking Him for bringing trials into our lives through which He ...Read More
The Virtue of Patience
Impatience can lead to frustration, which can lead to anger. Cultivating a patient spirit by focusing on the promises of God in His Word and the work of the Spirit of the Lord will lessen frustration and reduce the anger ...Read More
Job's Repentance and Restoration
Sometimes restoration comes to us in this lifetime, but sometimes it awaits the age to come. In truth, all of God's faithful servants will be finally vindicated and restored, and that is what we all long for with great hope. ...Read More
The Lord Answers Job
Matthew Henry comments on today's passage: "The judge upon the bench must have the last word; so God had here, and so he will have in every controversy, for every man's judgment proceeds from him and by his definitive sentence ...Read More
Elihu's Arrogance
We often act as if we know so much more than those who came before us simply because we have computers, advanced medicine, and the other benefits of the technological revolution. The truth of the matter, however, is that although ...Read More
Job's Final Defense
From the example of Job and other key biblical figures such as Paul, we learn that it is right and proper to make a defense of ourselves and to not repent for sin that we have not committed. Sometimes, as ...Read More
Understanding God's Discipline
Truth, if wrongly applied, can actually do more harm than good. Job's friends were not wrong that God disciplines His children, but they did err in viewing all discipline in punitive terms. Such a view will lead to poor counsel ...Read More
The Response of Eliphaz
The fall has introduced a certain degree of chaos, from our perspective, into this world. Although creation is never chaotic to the Lord and Maker of the universe, the presence of sin means that sometimes people suffer the effects of ...Read More


text:
"Pee-Cee" is a lowriding brother from the South Central area of Los Angeles, California. He's a long-time auto enthusiast who has been dippin' on the streets for years. It was only about seven months ago when he came across a woman out in Compton, California, who was selling this '82 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme. It had spoke rims and a decent hydraulics setup, but it was in need of some real-deal TLC. Pee-Cee purchased it from her and immediately began the elaborate customization process with help from some of the top lowrider builders in Southern California.
Many new parts and accessories were added or put in place of old or missing ones by the crew at Homies Hydraulics. Anthony Fuentes at Homies spent a lot of time hunting down new side markers, taillights, bezels and emblems (among other parts) by Internet and phone to shops all across the nation. Anthony found the rubbers and moldings for the Cutty's doors, windows and bumpers at Steele Rubber Products in North Carolina. Eventually, the pieces of this "Sticky Situation" all came together and the result was an upgraded '86 Cutlass look.
Pee-Cee has plans for selling the Cutty now that it is complete with more than $20,000 invested, and he hopes to find a '59 Chevy Impala for his next project. Immediately after Sticky Situation's photo shoot, the ride was shipped over to Pee-Cee's other home in Washington State. Pee-Cee sends a message out to the Pacific Northwest to watch out for this show-stopping Cutlass!
|Sticky Situation
|'82 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme
|South Central Los Angeles, California
|No affiliation
|The stock 305-c.i.d. engine was built up by "Compton Jeff." The stock transmission was also rebuilt and Joe's Muffler in Bellflower, California, added a dual-exhaust Flowmaster muffler.
|Jose Pedroza from G'z Auto Body in Long Beach, California, painted the Cutlass tangerine pearl and Angelo Maizano (also from Long Beach) added elegance with his fine pinstriping. Mario at American Sunroof in Paramount, California, installed a moonroof so that Pee-Cee can catch some moonbeams during those midnight cruises.
|Fernando's Upholstery in Los Angeles, California, reupholstered the entire inside of the Cutty with tan felt-like material.
|Sound System:
|"Tony" of South Central L.A. was the man put in charge of installing a clean system. An Alpine head unit shoots the sounds to Pioneer tweeter and midrange speakers. The low tones of the bass can be heard coming through two Bazooka tube speakers located in the trunk.
|Cesar Rodriguez Olivares at Homies Hydraulics in Paramount, California, did all of the necessary chassis work, getting it reinforced and ready for the hydraulic suspension. The rest of the crew at Homies installed a three-pump hydraulic setup with 8-inch (front) and 10-inch (rear ) cylinders (installed in a coil-over fashion), 1-ton springs, 12 batteries and four switches.
|P155/80-R13 Gillette whitewall
|13×7 Gold Star wires with tangerine spokes


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ROME– As president of the Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace, Cardinal Peter Turkson played a major role in the organization of the 25th anniversary of the World Day of Prayer for Peace in Assisi held on Oct 27.
What many people do not know is that Cardinal Turkson served as a guide and translator for a traditional religious leader from Ghana, his home country, at the original World Day of Prayer for Peace convoked by Pope John Paul II in 1986.
The cardinal described that experience in an editorial in L'Osservatore Romano, the Vatican newspaper, saying, "A scene remains vividly engraved in my mind: that man, another Togolese religious leader and myself, in a room, each one recollected in prayer."
Here is the full text from Cardinal Turkson's editorial in Saturday's Osservatore Romano:
Twenty-five years ago, I served a traditional religious leader from Ghana as guide and translator and accompanied him throughout the World Day of Prayer for Peace convoked by Blessed Pope John Paul II. A scene remains vividly engraved in my mind: that man, another Togolese religious leader, and myself, in a room, each one recollected in prayer.
The 25th anniversary commemoration of that historic "first Assisi" had as its theme Pilgrims of truth, pilgrims of peace. I could not help but be struck by the evolution, the development, which was taking place before my eyes on Thursday 27 October under the guidance of Pope Benedict XVI, and although there were many innovative elements, for me the most striking is expressed in the word pilgrimage.
The notion of pilgrimage, common to nearly all the world's religions with non-religious examples as well, connotes the notion of a desire, an effort, a pursuit, a search, a yearning – and all of these in common with others who share the same – getting everyone involved into motion. Visibly and tangibly so, it was still dark on Thursday morning when we began gathering at the Vatican Train Station and boarded the special Frecciargento.
It would not have been a pilgrimage without prayer, which we find in the title, Day of reflection, dialogue and prayer for peace and justice in the world. Prayer began already on the train as, here and there, one could notice a pilgrim discretely using a rosary or other traditional expression. In Assisi, after a frugal lunch in the Convent Refectory, everyone was invited to observe a time of quiet for personal reflection and prayer.
Another innovative contrast now emerges. Certainly in the Christian tradition and probably in many others, the most effective thing we can do for peace is to pray for conversion, beginning with the conversion of each one's own heart. But "effective" is not the same as "active". And in 2011, it seems to me that by going on pilgrimage together, all of us participated in a common quest and were together involved in the hard work of peace-making. Thus everyone testified in deed that it is possible to come and work together for a more just and solidary world.
In 1986 all the Heads of Delegation were religious leaders. There is no statistic to express what proportion of mankind they represented but certainly it was less than 100% as some who are not religious would not identify with the World Day of Prayer. In 2011, inviting a politician and three philosophers publicly declared not to be religious, the Holy Father deliberately included the whole of the human family. The quest for peace is a yearning of all hearts. For indeed, "now that vital goods shared by the entire human family are at stake," the whole human family should come out and demonstrate.
From among the many Witnesses to Peace, what struck me was, above all, the humble truthfulness of the Holy Father who "as a Christian [admits] that in history there has been recourse to violence in the name of Christian faith. Shamefully, we recognize it." Then the admission on the part of Julia Kristeva, spokesperson of agnostic humanism, of the need for "a new reflection on the choice and responsibility of motherhood. Secularization is today's only civilization which has nothing to say about the reality of being a mother." And then Olav Fykse Tveit, General Secretary of the World Council of Churches, denouncing the fact that the high level of unemployment among young people throughout the world is a great obstacle to a just peace.
"The genuine search for truth, the awareness of a common origin, a common earth, a common destination," commented a thinker close to our Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace, "can really be the ground for a new era of durable harmony among all the nations." Words to share, while remembering above all that, without God's help, no authentic pilgrimage of peace is possible.


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Hyundai Genesis Coupe 2.0T, 3.8 Brembo GT-R Systems Brake Kits
This is the ultimate system intended to be used on the street or track, yet it can be a very potent race system without compromising overall streetability: none of the noise or comfort issues of a race system, yet the qualities of a race caliper such as the strength of billet monobloc construction and corrosion resistance of nickel plating.
***Images are for representational purposes only. Actual product may vary.***


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Former Agent to Hollywood Stars Becomes Ordained Minister
An agent to Hollywood stars recently became a Protestant minister in Scotland.
As of June 2, Sang Cha became an ordained minister for the Church of Scotland, according to the Guardian.
His earnings as a minister, $50,000, will not compare to his former Hollywood lifestyle, which brought in about $3 million.
"In the Church of Scotland the most one can ever make is £30,000 per year so I chose this path with my eyes wide open," he told BBC.
Cha, 34, is also the first person of Korean descent to be ordained into the Church of Scotland.
He came from a Christian family beginning with his grandfather's conversion to Presbyterianism, influenced by John Ross, who published the first Korean translation of the Bible in 1911.
When he was eight, his family moved to New Jersey and then after college he moved to California where he wanted to be a "social commentator" but ended up working as an agent with two pagers, a cell phone and 83 hours immersed in work.
"It was a manic lifestyle, spent going through piles of scripts. You had to be 'on' at all times," he told BBC.
When he graduated from the University of Pennsylvania, he originally wanted to pursue being a producer, he said.
"I never wanted to be an agent, I wanted to be a producer, to make the next Dead Poets Society. That movie still animates my world and Peter Weir I think is a fantastic director," he shared.
He is best known for working with Giovanni Ribisi, Sean Astin, Samwise Gamgee and Juliette Lewis.
He said that although he enjoyed the thrill of Hollywood, at the end "it perpetuated the material culture."
However, he added that if it was used as a medium to connect storylines and narratives that can "positively impact the world and shift, and impact the way we feel," then "it's a wonderful thing from God."
He left Hollywood in 2002 and began working in Alaska as a volunteer for AmeriCorps. He later went to Cambridge University where his mentor suggested him to go to Church of Scotland's theological school.
He believes that the church should be attentive to the ideas the world has to offer, such as Hollywood, of course without getting seduced by them but "navigating them on our own terms."


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Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Getting in the sterile field
One of the patients I met that week was a woman I'll call Sara, a nonsmoker in her 40s with lung cancer and carcinomatous meningitis. She was getting intrathecal chemotherapy instilled into the Ommaya reservoir in her brain three times a week...and this week, while her attending was skiing in Colorado, it was my turn to do it.
As you can imagine, putting chemo into someone's brain is a tad unnerving. The sterile field is no joke. Enough said.
Sara was a delightful young woman but very scared of needles. Sara's husband was an extraordinarily hairy, extraordinarily affectionate guy. Though I had never met them before, it was obvious they were MADLY in love. They had been married for 7 years, as they told me in a giddy voice at some point, but they looked like honeymooners--nuzzling noses, rubbing each other's shoulders. It bordered on inappropriate for a clinic waiting area, but I figured: hey, she's got metastatic cancer; they can do whatever they want. I certainly wasn't going to say anything about all the physicality....
except that it was almost impossible to administer her intrathecal chemotherapy. Over and over, I would sit her up and prep and drape her upper half. At the moment of truth, dose measured, name and history number of the sticker double-checked against her hospital bracelet, syringe full of chemotherapy approaching, his big hairy hands would grip her cheeks through the drape, and he would plant a big kiss on her forehead and say, "It's just one more small needle, hon, and it'll be over in a few seconds" or "I love you so much. You are the strongest woman I know." On more than one occasion, he actually lifted the drape with those big furry hands and said, "Baby, how do you manage to look so beautiful without a single hair on your head?" He looked lovestruck every single time I saw him, as though he would die if she had to be draped and therefore out of his sight for another minute. Over and over, I explained that this was the brain we were dealing with. Over and over, I explained the sterile field and how you really couldn't get in it, seriously. Over and over, he couldn't resist--or, more precisely, couldn't resist her. Every single time I saw her that week--three visits in all--it took at least 3 tries to seal the deal and instill the chemotherapy into her brain. Though I will admit that it drove me crazy at the time, particularly on the busiest days, I always walked away from those visits kind of smiling to myself.
I learned 2 or 3 weeks later from Sara's attending that she had passed away. She was sitting on the toilet one morning and just fell over dead. Her husband was so grief-stricken by the realization that she was gone that he just held her on the bathroom floor until she was cold and it was dark outside, and then called 911. By the time the ambulance came, she was clearly long-deceased, and they did nothing more than give her (and him...in the back, lying on the stretcher with her) a ride to the hospital. Apparently it violated their policies, but apparently they couldn't say no to him. Huh.
Though I didn't know either Sara or her husband well, I was absolutely overwhelmed by their love. I have cared for a lot of cancer patients and their families at the end of life and witnessed love under the magnifying glass of impending death more times than I can remember. But Sara and her husband were different somehow. Their love was truly unconditional, timeless...raw and unstoppable.
I'm not sure why, since I really didn't know him, but I decided to write him a quick condolence card. It was a completely nondescript card from a box of generic condolence cards--a sad reality of life as a medical oncologist that we buy the bulk condolence cards in packs of 10 or 25 the way others buy their generic thank you cards--but it's the thought that counts, right? As I wrote and reflected on why I had been driven to write to this near-stranger, the words just kept coming. It ended up having 2 or 3 extra pages (all on basic white paper from a Staples 500 pack) added, folded up inside the card. Unleashed, the letter morphed out of my control--as I recall, there was talk of great loves and young life inexplicably cut short and spirituality. I never got any reply. I hadn't really expected to, but I nonetheless wondered if I had overwhelmed him (did he even remember who I was?). Eventually I let it go and kind of forgot about the letter and Sara and him in the deluge of loss we face in oncology.
Years passed. On a random busy December day, I was in clinic and one of the front office staff came to get me, saying I had a visitor. It was Sara's husband. I didn't recognize him at all at first. He had cut his previously longish hair very short and shaved off his full mustache and beard since I last saw him. He looked tired and old for his apparently middle-aged age. As I approached him, I searched his face for clues of who he might be, not wanting to deal with the awkwardness of confessing I had no idea who he was. Then he stuck out his hand--the hairiest hand I have ever felt--and it all came rushing back. "You're Sara's husband. How are you doing? I hope you're not here as a patient..." (it is a Cancer Center after all).
He proceeded to ramble, standing right there in the lobby, how much he had loved Sara, how much he treasured that letter, how much it had quieted his mind that a stranger could see how much he loved Sara, reasoning that if a stranger could be so moved by his love for her, then surely Sara must have known how much he loved her, and how that was all he could ever ask for on earth. Then he said, "We always had a bunch of photographs and knick-knacks on our hearth. After Sara died, I cleared them all off. The only thing up there now is the urn with her ashes...and your letter. Anyway, I just came to tell you that." Then he turned and walked right out the front door.
I was too dumbfounded to say anything or walk after him, but in mind, I said to him: You just got in the sterile field all over again.
14 comments:
That is the most beautiful and heartwarming thing I have read in a very long time. We never know the difference we will make on someone.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousDecember 24, 2008 at 10:57 AM
Wow, thanks for that beautiful story. That made me cry.ReplyDelete
you made me cry, too. that is such a beautiful story. thanks.ReplyDelete
That is so beautiful. We all hope to make that kind of impact on someone's life. Thank you for sharing.ReplyDelete
A very moving and profound story. Thanks.ReplyDelete
"in mind, I said to him: You just got in the sterile field all over again."ReplyDelete
*sniffles* Beautifully told.
That is a profoundly beautiful story. Thank you so much for sharing.ReplyDelete
What an amazing story. Years ago I too wrote a letter of condolences to a family that lost their 24 week preemie.ReplyDelete
I often wonder if they got and how they are doing. I'm was so happy to hear that he came back and saw you!
The letters we write really do make a difference.
This was so perfect for Christmas Eve. Thanks for sharing.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousDecember 30, 2008 at 10:05 AM
What a gorgeous story. And beautifully written. Thank youReplyDelete
Oh my gosh. That made me tear up. Thank you for sharing that.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJanuary 1, 2009 at 4:51 PM
Thank you for your beautiful story. Sometimes the depth of a patient's sorrow makes me so sad that I wish I hadn't let the patient into my heart. But at the end of the day, I know that it something very special that our patients let us walk beside them in these very difficult times in their lives...It makes me once again appreciate the challenging, heart-wrenching, humbling, often frustrating job of being a physician and how blessed I am to have that duty. Thank you for your story as an additional reminder of that blessing. -OB ResidentReplyDelete
What a moving story, and so well-written. My tears are flowing!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJanuary 10, 2009 at 11:23 PM
Thank you so much for sharing this story!ReplyDelete
I often wonder if what I do has any impact on others, but in the end I always realize that that's not what's important. The reason we do kind things is just that. To be kind to others, and yes, most of the time we have no idea what impact our kindness has. It's so encouraging to hear that sometimes our kind actions have a more profound effect on someone than we could ever imagine.


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This minimalist bangle makes maximum impact, with its two matching stones coming together. It's the ultimate meeting of the minds and hearts. Choose your stone and your metal type, then style it and stack it with other bracelets.
I love everything about this jewelry. From the design process to the high-quality product, and even the packaging when it's delivered... it just feels special, and makes you feel special.
I don't change my jewelry frequently so I like what I wear consistently to have meaning. The initial charms represent my daughters who are my whole world. I love that I can carry them close to my heart no matter where I am. The only thing missing is my husband's initial but I've given him plenty of hints!
My Chain Letter Pave bracelet is absolutely gorgeous! I love how delicate it is and how much sparkle the diamonds have! I constantly get compliments on it!!!
I got my Tiary necklace for Mother's Day and have worn it every day since. Love it on its own and with other pieces and best of all it's a beautiful reminder of the people I love and the love they have for me.
I recently discovered Tiary and love how you can customize every detail of its jewelry. I put my three children's initials on the Tiary "Chain Letter Pavé Necklace-Trio", and it's so light and delicate, I wear it every day.
We love celebrating milestones with Tiary. My daughter and I each wear our "The Letter" Necklaces every day and my niece has chosen Tiary to commemorate her Bat Mitzvah. Not just great quality, uniquely custom pieces but a fabulous experience from end to end!
From the customer service to the packaging to the actual product, buying from Tiary has been a pleasant experience through and through. They truly care about each and every customer. I am very happy with my dainty, yet delicate and luxurious gold hoop earrings which I can both wear every day and dress up for fancier events. I will be purchasing again in the future.
I just received my customized ring from Tiary and I'm in love! I ordered 14K with genuine emerald ring in the style "hang loose" and could not be happier! I was pleasantly surprised at the gorgeous medium green color of the Emerald and the craftsmanship of the ring was top notch. The customer service answered all my questions so patiently and gave me peace of mind ordering fine jewelry online. I highly recommend Tiary and would most definitely order more from them!


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7 Ways To Increase Your Salary Now
In business, it's all about the Benjamins, right? Certainly, we're all aware that securing salary increases are essential to career progression, but many of us don't know how to make it happen. Whether you're negotiating a new job offer or re-negotiating your salary at a current job, my experts have great ideas about how to earn what you're worth -- ASAP. Because no matter how much you love your job, you'll struggle to be satisfied if you're not being paid your market value.
Wait Until You're Wanted
Particularly after an interview, you need to know they want you before they'll fight for you (in the form of more money). "Employers don't like to go back and forth about money any more than an applicant wants to. If they have decided to hire you and you are firm in your statement, you will [most likely] receive the higher salary," says Monique Tatum, CEO of Beautiful Planning Marketing Group & PR.
Search Salary Info Online "The internet has changed [negotiating] in that it is way easier to find what comparable salaries are," says career coach Jack Chapman, author of the recently updated Negotiating Your Salary: How To Make $1000 a Minute. His favorites sites? Salary.com, PayScale.com, Glassdoor.com and Indeed.com. "Once you have that info, you're able to have a better conversation with your boss. You can make an argument with some facts behind it other than your own individual value," says Chapman.
Ask For More Time, Then More Money A day or two will help you figure out what you think of a job offer or re-negotiation number -- and what your next move should be. "Ask for at least 24 to 48 hours. Silence is golden when you just let it hang there awhile following an initial offer. Don't rush to fill the quiet void!" says Meg Montford, career coach and CEO of Abilities Enhanced, a career coaching service.
Lay Out Your Value If you've been at your company for awhile, schedule a meeting separate from your annual review, which can be a hectic time for managers, to discuss your successes and how your salary should reflect that. "Having a solid list of accomplishments showing what you've made saved or achieved for the organization helps keep you focused on facts not emotion," says Carolyn Thompson, author of Ten Secrets To Getting Promoted.
Get Another Offer This is an oldie but a goodie, says Mary Greenwood, author of How To Interview Like A Pro. Just like with dating, looking desirable to others can make the one you're with want you more.
Never Let Negotiations End With a "No" You've gotten a job offer or salary increase number that's lower than what you want, but you hear "the money just isn't there." Time to start searching for another opportunity? Not so fast. "Say 'I don't know if I can accept it but is there some other way, like time off, or performance bonuses or something else that could make the package worthwhile?'" suggests Chapman. You might even offer to add a few responsibilities in order to increase your worth to the company, or ask about forgoing health insurance if you can buy it elsewhere for less.
Know When To Say When "Know when it's no longer in your best interest to keep negotiating and then move on to the next opportunity," says Montford. If you feel like your company is consistently getting the better end of the deal, they probably are. Eventually, you'll want to go where you're valued.
Have a good salary negotiation tip? Please sign in below and share.
More on MoneyWatch:


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Lightning F Pyatt has broken collar bone
Tampa, FL (SportsNetwork.com) - Tampa Bay Lightning forward Tom Pyatt is expected to be out for several weeks after suffering a broken collar bone.
The Times quoted Bolts head coach Jon Cooper on Wednesday, who said Pyatt is expected to miss action through at least Thanksgiving.
Pyatt sustained the injury during Tuesday's 3-2 overtime win over the Sabres in Buffalo.
The 26-year-old has yet to record a point this season, after recording eight goals and eight assists in 43 contests last year.


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Yankees sign Dominican prospect Molina
The Yankees have added a promising five-tool talent to their prospect pipeline, signing 16-year-old Dominican outfielder Leonardo Molina to a deal that includes a $1.4 million bonus.
Molina, who was unable to sign with a Major League organization until he celebrated his 16th birthday on Thursday, is ranked fifth on MLB.com's list of international prospects.
The 6-foot-2, 170-pound Molina bats right-handed and throws right-handed. He has impressed scouts with his defense, running ability and arm strength, leading some to believe that he projects as an above-average center fielder in the future.
Molina was a top prospect in the Dominican Prospect League and has been discussed as arguably the best athlete in this year's class.
The signing puts the Yanks over their allotted bonus pool by 4.9 percent ($1,970,000 to $1,877,900), which means they will pay a 75 percent tax on the overage. That amounts to $69,075.


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Recent advances in production and technology have moved the ball downfield in biofuels' big game to take market share from fossil fuels.
"We've done it already," says Advanced Biofuels Association president Mike McAdams, referring to the November 2010 opening of a plant turning animal fats from Tyson Foodsinto renewable diesel. "That's 75 million gallons of capacity. That's commercial scale."
While biofuels like corn ethanol have been around for decades, Tyson's renewable diesel is a "drop-in" biofuel—a fungible bio-based fuel that is a chemical copy of its oil-based analog.
That means it can use the same engines and distribution systems as fossil-fuel diesel, while providing the same performance.
"Our fuel molecules are virtually identical" to fossil-fuel diesel, says Bob Ames, Tyson's VP for renewable energy, adding that the renewable diesel doesn't produce some of the carcinogenic compounds and particulate matter when combusted, like with fossil-fuel diesel.
"What we're excited about is that it's similar to the best parts of diesel," he says.
The plant is operated by Dynamic Fuels LLC, a joint venture of Tyson Foods and fuel-maker Syntroleum .
This fall also saw Solazyme—one of several algae-based biofuels startups in the sector — raise $52 million from investors, including Unilever, and deliver its first 1,500 gallons on drop-in bio jet fuel to the US Navy.
While there's growing optimism in the biofuels sector, some insiders are wont to temper it with patience.
"It's one thing to fill test tubes in a lab. It's another to fill tanker trucks, let alone pipelines," says Dallas Kachan, managing director of cleantech research firm Kachan and Co.
Kachan says the opening of the $150 million Dynamic Fuels plant, near Baton Rouge, La., is welcome news, but the biofuels sector has been promising breakthroughs that compete with fossil fuels on price and scale for years now—consuming millions in capital in the process.
In his firm's sector predictions for 2011, a bullish Kachan says that "investors still smarting from crop-based ethanol, biodiesel, cellulosic ethanol and algae oil disappointments may not see a drop-in biofuels revolution at hand."
He points to the recent jump in shares of biofuel firm Amyris as "representative of a larger awakening to the transportation, storage, energy balance and fungibility benefits of drop-in biofuels."
Algae Gets Hot
In 2009, algae-based fuels were hot, with everyone from newcomers like Solazme to oil-and- gas giants like ExxonMobil ramping up R&D activities.
ExxonMobil, for instance, announced $600 million in algae investments in June that year.
"We looked at every alternative out there and found this to be the most promising biofuel," says ExxonMobil spokesperson Cynthia Bergman, referring to algae-based biofuels' compatibility with fossil fuels.
She adds that this past summer, ExxonMobil's efforts "moved from lab to greenhouse" to test larger scale production.
Before 2009, cellulosic ethanol technologies—ethanol derived from various woody plant sources instead of pricey food-crop plants, like corn—also attracted a lot of investor interest.
But while firms like Range Fuels have opened production facilities, cellulosic ethanol has yet to reach the scale it had hoped.
These incremental moves forward often mean resetting the clock, says Kachan, adding that broader commercial scale production is still a ways off.
"Cellulosic ethanol in any meaningful quantity has been 'two years away' for five years now." he says. "Similarly, drop-in fuels are also at least five years away in any significant quantity."
It's worth noting, however, that his forecast is shorter than the decade or more other industry insiders have mentioned in the past year.
Tyson's chicken-fat diesel may have proven its technology, but the next step will be ramping up production to drive down costs.
While the scale of the Dynamic Fuels plant rivals that of existing commercial-scale ethanol plants, drop-in biofuels aiming to take on oil and gas will need to grow like chickens on steroids.
Even a 75 million-gallon capacity is a drop in the 40 billion-gallon diesel ocean consumed by the US transportation sector in 2008, according to the most recent Dept. of Energy data.
This kind of scale "can take an immense amount of time and money," says Michael Kanellos, senior analyst with GTM Research, a cleantech research firm.
Next Steps
In the near term, he says, that may mean more biofuel startups being absorbed by Big Oil, which can leverage their distribution channels and production expertise.
"These guys will make a good living," he says about the biofuels sector. "They'll become the 'biological brain' for Chevron ."
Kachan says that Solazyme is targeting $60-80 a barrel within about two years for its "biocrude," rivaling current crude oil prices.
He adds Japan's Nippon Oil, along with a Hitachi subsidiary, are "hoping to get costs below $3 a gallon for biocrude from Euglena, a pond-dwelling single-celled organism, with no timeframe given."
Tyson's Ames wouldn't comment on production costs for their renewable diesel. "That's not our strategy" to compete with oil-based diesel on day one, adding, "Our strategy is to build a market for the premium properties of our products" like its cleaner-burning aspects, he says.
Kachan says bringing premium, higher-margin specialty products to market first—before eventually going head-to-head on commoditized products, like diesel—is a "typical route" for new biofuels firms.
Tyson's Ames agrees but adds he's confident they're leveling the playing field on price with fossil fuels across all products, as research and production increases.
"It's an exciting future," he says. "Hold on and watch."


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High quality A/B grade Oak Veneered MDF panel measuring 400mm x 300mm. Ideal for structural projects requiring a high quality appearance and finish on both the topside and panelling. Suitable for laser cutting.
This MDF panel is veneered on both faces of the sheet: A grade veneer on the front and B grade on the reverse. Please note: As wood is a natural product, there is often a crook or bow to the sheet. The natural twist might be in excess of 10mm (see below - Tolerances and Caution).
A wood veneer is not like an artificial surface such as melamine or a laminate. It is cut from the log and therefore has its own unique grain, texture, and colour.
A Grade Veneer is a very high quality grading (typically the best you will see). The surface of the material will be consistent in appearance with no large variations in colour. Small pin knots are allowed and these would typically be only a few mm in diameter. This grade veneer is on the topside of this MDF sheet.
The B Grade Veneer underside shows the natural look of the veneer. There will be changes in colour that show the grain pattern. Sound, smooth knots are allowed and these will typically be under 15mm to 35mm in diameter (depending on the countries grading rules). The surface should normally be free from open knots and plugs. The material should be suitable for paint / stain or a lacquered finish.
There are two different cuts that can be used in veneer production:
- 'Quarter Cut' are cut at 90 degrees, producing the effect of a straight grain.
- 'Crown Cut' are sliced through the log, producing 'Crowns' and adding more character to the finish (as used on this product).
This product conforms to E1 (low) formaldehyde levels and is often described as 'Laser Grade' MDF but there is no official classification for this. We believe that E1 conforming MDF is the safest and best MDF for using in a laser cutter.
- A/B grade Oak Veneered finish.
- Veneer thickness approximately 0.5mm.
- High quality wood and veneer, for great looking finishes.
- MDF core.
- Suitable for use in internal dry conditions as defined in EN 622 parts 1 and 5 and conforms to EN13986.
- Low formaldehyde emissions.
- 1 x 4.0mm Oak Veneered MDF, 400mm x 300mm Sheet.
- Length: 400mm.
- Width: 300mm.
- Height: 4.0mm.
- Veneer thickness (approximately): 0.5mm.
The manufacturing tolerance for the thickness of veneered MDF sheets include the tolerance for both the MDF and the veneer. The total combined thickness of both the MDF and the veneer could be as little as 3.35mm and as much as 4.65mm. The veneer on each face could be as thin as 0.25mm and as thick as 0.75mm.
- As wood is a natural product there is often a bow or crook to the MDF, and in some cases a twist. We have measured in excess of 10mm rise between the flat centre of the MDF and the corner. These twists are completely normal. If you are using this product on a laser cutter; these sheets should be strapped/taped to the laser bed before cutting.
- There are many sub species of European Oak and each sub species has its own unique visual appearance. We are unable to specify which sub species we are supplied with and this can change on a delivery by delivery basis. Orders will be fulfilled with whichever sub species we have been supplied with.
Laser cutter examples:
- On all Perspex, veneers, Styrofoam, polypropylene, plywood and MDF sheet orders (excluding A4 size) there is a flat delivery charge of £6.50 per order in the U.K. (£18.00 for remote locations).
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Large Materials
- On all Perspex, veneers, Styrofoam, polypropylene, plywood and MDF sheets (except A4 size) a large materials charge applies per order.
- This is 6.50 (7.80 including VAT) for most UK locations, 12 (14.40 including VAT) for Northern Ireland and 18.00 (21.60 including VAT) for UK remote locations.
- For a list of postcodes that will be charged the remote location rate click here.
Same Day Dispatch
- Orders placed online before 3:00pm Monday - Friday (excluding public holidays and our Christmas shutdown period) are always dispatched the same day provided the goods are in stock.
- If the goods are not in stock we will endeavour to contact you as soon as possible to discuss a dispatch date.
- If you would like to collect your order, or use your own courier then there is an option you can select during checkout.
- We do not charge a packaging or handling fee for this service, and you will receive an email when your order has been processed, you can collect half an hour after receipt of this email.
Further Information
- For information about all of the delivery options we offer click here.
Excl. VAT: £3.95 Incl. VAT: £4.74 As low as: £3.66
6mm Poplar Laser Plywood, 600mm x 400mm sheet
A 6mm laser grade Poplar Plywood Sheet. AB grade with a consistent su...
Excl. VAT: £7.25 Incl. VAT: £8.70 As low as: £7.14
0.8mm BR Grade Birch Laser Plywood, 600mm x 400mm sheet
High quality 0.8mm Birch Laser Plywood. This plywood has a smoother su...
Excl. VAT: £6.70 Incl. VAT: £8.04 As low as: £6.66
1.5mm BR Grade Birch Laser Plywood, 600mm x 400mm sheet
High quality 1.5mm Birch Laser Plywood. This plywood has a smoother su...
Excl. VAT: £9.15 Incl. VAT: £10.98 As low as: £9.06
2mm BR Grade Birch Laser Plywood, 600mm x 400mm sheet
High quality 2mm Birch Laser Plywood. This plywood has a smoother surf...
Excl. VAT: £3.45 Incl. VAT: £4.14 As low as: £3.60
3.6mm Oak Veneer Plywood, 600mm x 400mm sheet
High quality A grade Oak veneer Plywood Sheet measuring 600mm x 400mm ...
Excl. VAT: £8.20 Incl. VAT: £9.84
Flexible Sapele Veneer 600mm x 400mm sheet
High quality flexible Sapele Veneer 600mm x 400mm. Ideal for adding a ...


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The future of motoring is here!
And it's in Shanghai.
With China now the world's largest market for new cars, manufacturers are falling over themselves to sell the Chinese new, ground breaking designs.
So it should come as no surprise that this year's Shanghai Motor Show is jam packed full of futuristic concepts.
Click the gallery and step into the twilight zone. If you dare.


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The Graduate Division invites applications from prospective students with outstanding academic records who appear to have the highest potential to succeed in their intended graduate program of study and who are likely to make substantial contributions to their fields of study. All applicants must meet Graduate Division admissions standards and documentation requirements. Many academic departments have additional requirements, including the GRE, TOEFL score minimums, GPA minimums and other documentation specific to the graduate field of study. Please check the information provided by the department for these additional requirements.
To be eligible, an applicant must hold or expect to hold prior to matriculation a bachelor's degree from a regionally accredited U.S. college or university, or an equivalent degree from a recognized non-U.S. institution of higher education. At minimum, the applicant needs to demonstrate above average academic performance (B average, usually a 3.0 on a 1.0-4.0 scale) for undergraduate course work and for any post-baccalaureate or graduate course work. Because the number of qualified applicants exceeds the number of spaces available, admission is competitive. Meeting minimum admissions standards does not guarantee admission.


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Connector guide pins are components of a connector system that are used to ensure that the connector is inserted and oriented correctly. This helps to prevent both physical damage to the connector and potential electrical damage to other components in the system.
Features of connector guide pins
The arrangement of connector guide pins in a particular connector depends on the specific standard that the connector adheres to. Connector guide pins are a fundamental (and in some cases required) component of a modular connector, and may be optional components of panel- or board-mounted connector systems if guide pins are not built into the system itself. They normally do not carry any electrical signals; instead they are used to ensure that the connector is correctly inserted and in some cases to increase the mechanical strength of the connection itself.
Applications of connector guide pins
Connector guide pins are used in a variety of different connector standards, including many different circular connectors.


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|Version 6 (modified by patrickdk, 13 years ago) (diff)
Sites Powerd by XCache
The auto statistics collector is not done yet, so you may write down your site url and some notes here just manually.
Please follow a few rules when you add your site:
- you have to control the site or have to have the permission of the owner to name it here
- include the req/s or req/day your get and put yourself into the corresponding category
- add yourself in a alphabetic order based on the TLD
See Example
more than 100mio req/day (or 1000 req/s)
- http://www.example.com/ - Hosting an example of XCache with ~1000-2000 req/s
- http://www.golpo.net - We are using XCache1.2.1 Dev. Version.And im glad to get Xcache. It really helped us out a lot. We are using vbulletin with PHP 5.2.0. It reduces our serverload. And really makes our site load faster.
more than 10mio req/day (or 100 req/s)
low traffic
- http://xcache.lighttpd.net/demo/ - XCache Demo
- http://www.digitalexpressions.nu - Decreases page generation time, and also used for mysql caching


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I'm looking to write a bot for Hamachi but I have no idea how I'd retrieve messages from the chat and send them as well. I know that hamachi encrypts its messages so it doesn't seem like I could send packets, bypassing the client, because it wouldn't receive them.
Can anyone help me out here?


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In the opening scenes of Murphy's Romance we see Sally Field bring her young son (Corey Haim) to a small Arizona town where they've rented a ranch house, and set about fixing the place up. They get out the hammer and nails and paintbrushes, and Field puts out leaflets for her new horse-stabling business.
You think to yourself: Is this going to be another movie in which the indomitable Field establishes herself against all odds in a rural setting, picking up an Oscar nomination in the process?
The answer is no, not really. Oh, there's a bit of that in Murphy's Romance, and Field will probably get another Oscar nomination, but the film has other fish to fry, and they are very flavorful ones.
For the most past, it's a low-key portrait of people just trying to get by—not winning big battles, but just trying to make life work out. As such, it's an immensely appealing character study.
Field plays Emma Moriarty, a divorcee who may be getting involved with an older widower, Murphy Jones (James Garner), who owns the town drugstore, and who is something of an eccentric. He's a stubborn old coot who prides himself on the shine on his 1927 car, plays the fiddle at the town dances, and is reportedly working on a chili cookbook. Garner is a natural in the role, the best film work he's done in many years.
This maybe romance is interrupted, however, by the arrival of Field's ex-husband, Bobby Jack (Brian Kerwin), a classic ne'er-do-well who moves back in with her, although their relationship remains platonic. He just needs someone to sponge off of for a while.
It's a measure of the good feeling of Murphy's Romance that even Bobby Jack, undeniably a weasel, is seen with some measure of sympathy. Director Martin Ritt, who guided Field to an Oscar in Norma Rae, creates a very placid, likable world in this film, and everyone fits into it in some way.
Ritt's unhurried rhythms allow time for some lovely moments: three people sitting on a town bench, enjoying the stars on a clear night; a bingo game at the Elks club; a quiet kitchen during a big barbecue, as Emma tries to get Murphy to disclose his age.
These moments are sweet, but not icky, largely because of the charisma of the stars. It's an old-fashioned movie that way. It unabashedly relies on star power to communicate character traits not contained in the screenplay. Luckily, Field and Garner are well up to these demands.
The score was composed by Carole King, who also sings several songs on the soundtrack. These add to the laid-back atmosphere. So does the small town itself – Florence, Ariz, according to the credits – which, by the authentic feel of its main street, looks like a wonderful place to be.
Ritt allows his story to ramble somewhat more than it needs to, and one may question the use of so many romantic sunsets. But quibbles tend to fade away in the light of the pleasant glow that emanates from this movie's quiet appeal. Murphy's Romance provides, in an old-fashioned way, a real nice time.
First published in the Herald, January 30, 1986
Well, I wish I'd done a better job of talking about this movie, which really is pretty nice. Martin Ritt, while not giving off a strong movie-movie vibe, was able to hit the ball solidly now and again, and it's somewhat surprising to see that he worked steadily through his career. Somewhere in there, if I'm remembering it right, is a scene in which Field suggests going to a movie with Garner, whereupon he gets a faraway look in his eyes and says, "I haven't been to the movies since the Duke died." Which is just exactly what that fellow, and many like him, would say. I like the line, I like the movie.


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- Allow team games to be played as terminator or assassin
- Take Doubles, Triples, and Quadruples out of the 'game type' setting
- Add a new 'Team Size' setting, or something appropriately named, for Single, Doubles, Triples, and Quads
- Restrict the combinations appropriately for the current number of players, currently this would allow only for Singles and Doubles to be played as Terminator or Assassin games; however, once 12 player games come, it could be expanded to triples and quads
- Terminator games could be scored either when a player eliminates another player (killing team's score averaged and calculated against individual's score) OR when one team eliminates another team (average the killing team's score against the average of the defeated team's score). Which to use is open for discussion.
- Assassin games would have team's assigned other team's for targets. The assassin team would have to defeat all players in the target team in order to win.
This will improve the following aspects of the site:
- It would allow new types of team games to be played. 4 team assassin or terminator has always seemed like it would be fun.
- I couldn't see this option being /that/ difficult to implement


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John Hennessey's life isn't special. Get up in the morning. Take the family wagon for a little drive. Come home. Granted, the family wagon is a 700-hp Hennessey CTS-V "Hammer Wagon" and the little drive includes a 189.7 mph standing-mile CTS-V world record. But he did drive it home.
The way Hennessey tells it, he knew someone was gunning for his Cadillac CTS-V standing-mile record at this past weekend's Texas Mile and his wife preferred the space offered by her GMC so he just borrowed the car back. And, oh, while the car is in the shop why not upgrade it from its former 650-hp trim to full V700-spec?
On his third pass Hennessey hit 189.7 mph, which breaks his own record for the CTS-V in the standing-mile and makes it faster than a stock ZR1 over the same distance. Insane.
"After I made the run on Saturday morning, I filled up and drove my wagon home 175 miles," Hennessey told us. "Then I drove it to work this morning."
See, nothing special. Typical suburban Texan dad stuff.


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I have been observing that there are so many fans from India and Pakistan here who are really struggling for space to vent their powerful emotions and to display their logically thought-out and stupendously insightful comments. In fact after hogging 75 % of the space from about two thirds of the threads, they poor guys, are still unable to find sufficient parking space thanks to the completely inconsiderate attitude of the other posters who insist on using the same threads for talking about the subject of the thread howsoever useless and insignificant it may be (and in all cases without exception is).
I have decided to start this thread for the benefit of these energetic young men from the sub-continent to use (and abuse) to their heart's content.
I would request the moderators to keep a strict watch for trollers trying to come and sabotage/hijack this private space meant for the exclusive purpose of slugging it out in the mother of all slug-fests - India is better than Pakistan is better than India is better than Pakistan.... ad infinitum.
Everyone else, please stick to your own silly pointless threads


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In an altruistic campaign to promote diversity within multi-culturalism, The Spoof has launched a massive endeavor to educate ethnocentric Americans as to how well they have it as compared to other so-called developed (but, by American standards, woefully inadequate) countries. This particular article considers subways of the world.
American Subways (the Best)
American subways put those of other nations to shame. They are larger; better maintained; serve more riders; stop at more stations; have better security; are plagued by more rapes, robberies, and murders (their greater security notwithstanding); and provide an extemporaneous home for the homeless, many of whom feel so much at home that they defecate, urinate, and litter on site and in sight. Unlike many of the other subways of the world, those in the United States are truly world class. Americans are so fond of their subways that they give them pet names such as Bart, San Francisco's subway system, which is named in honor of Bart Simpson, who appears on the popular television (TV) situation comedy (sitcom), The Simpsons.
New York City Subway
In the Big Apple (New York, for anti-Americans), the subway is the only way to get around town. Serving over 450 (i. e., 468, for the anal attentive scholar), stations, the subway allows gang members and Mafia thugs low-cost (free, if they jump the turnstiles at the entrances to the stations), convenient access to Manhattan and other swank areas that are full of rich, street-stupid sheep ready for the fleecing or the slaughter. Moreover, the subway trains themselves are ripe for the picking of thieves, pickpockets, muggers, and others, with an average weekly ridership of over 5,000,000 (i. e., 5,076,000, for the anal retentive scholar) daily riders! As if that's not enough, the damned thing's open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year! If a petty street criminal can't make a living off that number of people, he or she may as well retire and move to Miami.
CAUTION: Approximately 40 percent of the system is above-ground, so muggers, rapists, and murderers are well advised to become familiar with the entire system before committing a crime, as criminal activity is less subject to prevention, and arrests are less likely to occur, if crimes are committed underground.
"Baghdad on the Hudson"
The New York subway, nicknamed "Baghdad on the Hudson," after the movie by the same name, starring Robin Williams, has stations all over the place, including (for the anal retentive scholar): Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, and the Bronx. (There are none on Staten Island, because it's an island.) The track at the Coney Island station is aboveground and--get this!--in the form of a roller coaster! (Mayor Rudy Giuliani thought that would be cool and might help him to get re-elected; it didn't.)
Subway Line Designations
To confuse passengers, the subway uses an alphabetical designating system for some subway lines and a numerical designation system for other lines, switching them around at random. For aesthetic reasons and because the money was there and had to be spent or next year's allocations of funds would be reduced accordingly, bright primary colors are used on the map. The colors are employed simply to spend excess funds and to add color to the map; they have no symbolic significance and have nothing to do with the map's features, so passengers should not suppose that there is, for example, a "green route," a "red route," a "blue route," and so forth. The timetables that purport to show trains' arrival and departure times are notoriously unreliable, which adds to the fun, excitement, and adventure of riding the rails.
Beating the Fare
Riders descend or climb stairs that go on forever before arriving at the platforms beside which the trains streak by, sometimes stopping, sometimes not, at the whims of the drivers. Near the station's entrance (which is also the exit, if the passenger is leaving instead of arriving), passengers can buy tokens from vending machines using a Metro Card, which allows them to open the bar that otherwise prevents entrance through the turnstile. However, it is easy (and free) to jump the turnstile, which is what many local residents do, except when a transit police officer is present and forgets to look the other way. Wicked Wikipedia also offers some tips as to how to ride free or even how to make money by using the subway to one's own advantage, although one should note that these activities are illegal and could get their perpetrator into trouble:
"Until the replacement of the metal token, a popular scam was to jam the token slot in an entrance gate with paper. A rider would innocently drop a token in, be frustrated when it did not open the gate, and have to spend another token to enter at another gate. The token thief would then race out from hiding, and suck the token from the jammed slot with their [sic] mouth. This could be repeated many times so long as [sic] no police officers spotted the activity.
"In the late 1980s or early 1990s, enterprising transit riders discovered that tokens purchased for use in the Connecticut Turnpike toll booths were of the same size and weight as New York City subway tokens. Since they cost less than one third as much, they began showing up in subway collection boxes regularly."
Popular Destinations
Anyway, the subway will take riders anywhere they want to go in the Big Apple and, if they're not careful, to many places they don't want to go. Popular subway destinations are film locations, which include: the elevated BMT West End Line, upon and below which a subway and car chase takes place in The French Connection (1971); the IRT subway train along the Jerome Avenue line in the Bronx, whereon The Incident (1967) takes place; route 6 in Manhattan, where a train is hijacked in The Taking of Pelham 123 (1974); and--well, there are a bunch of them: buy a program!
San Francisco Subway ("Bart" to His Friends)
Named for Bart Simpson, who, in turn, is named for O. J. Simpson (no relation), the San Francisco subway runs like a snake (some San Franciscans--the Haight-Ashbury crowd--prefer the metaphor of a penis) under the fabled hills of the city of fruits and nuts (so called because of the many homosexuals and insane people who make the city their home).
The Desire To be "Different"
Just to be different, because people in San Francisco expect everything to be "different," Bart uses 5' 6" broad rail gauge instead of the 4' 8.5" standard gauge used everywhere else in the United States. As is true of San Francisco and San Franciscans in general, broad rail gauge is also a major pain in the ass, especially for engineers, requiring expensive, custom-made track equipment and subway trains, but, San Franciscans claim, "we're worth it."
The Electrifying Third Rail!
A third rail provides power, using bisexual AC/DC electricity to be as inclusive as possible of all sexes, genders, sexualities, and sexual identities, which is very important to San Franciscans. Passengers are cautioned not to approach the third rail unless they are seeking a cheap, convenient, and effective way of committing suicide at the city's (i. e., the taxpayers') expense. The third rail also adds to Bart's expense, because it requires walkways and passageways for underground tunnels, aerial structures, and the transbay tube for evacuation in case of earthquakes, terrorist attacks, or whatnot and to prevent inadvertent contact by evacuees with the third rail, but, San Franciscans say, "we're worth it." The third rail makes subway travel seem dangerous and exciting, however, because it requires such evacuation accoutrements and many warning signs are posted throughout the subway system, warning idiots, imbeciles, and morons that touching the high-voltage third rail could lead to a mercifully quick, but excruciatingly painful, death. To be "different," San Francisco allows businesses to pay for the signs in return for a brief advertisement, included, unobtrusively, in the text of the warning message, for example:
WARNING! Contact with the high-voltage third rail will fry your ass quicker and crispier than KFC cooks Colonel Sanders' delicious Kentucky Fried Chicken!
Danger, Adventure, and Excitement
Again, to be "different," Bart operates five lines, but runs several on the same track, which results in a train wreck approximately every 15 minutes and a passenger's death approximately every 20 minutes. Dismemberments occur less frequently, with the loss of limb happening at an averagr rate of one every 34 minutes. "New York's subway isn't dangerous comapred to Bart," a rider boasted. "All they have are rapes, muggings, and murders; we have the three D's: disfigurement, dismemmberment, and death!"
Color-coded Lines (and Tastes)
Like New York's subway, Bart is color-coded (for illiterates) on the system's map, but its officials never refer to the "red line," the "yellow line," the "green line," the "orange line," or the "black line," although they do sometimes refer to passengers' transfers from one line to another as "crossing the line." The reason for officials' avoidance of using colors to designate lines is "simple human decency," an official explained. "Were we to refer to a line as red, the native American might be offended, just as blacks could be offended by a reference to a 'black line' or Asians could be offended by a reference to a 'yellow line.' Gays, lesbians, and people of transgender status might be offended by referring to the colors collectively, as a 'rainbow' of transportation alternatives and options, for example." What could be offensive about the green and orange lines? "Martians, if there are any, shouldn't be called 'little green men, especially since, presumably, at least half of them are female," the official said, "and who knows what extraterrestrial life form might have an orange complexion? Nothing's as simple or direct as it seems. Public transportation isn't really about transportation, at least not entirely or, perhaps, even primarily; it's about politics and, more specifically, about liberal politics, about diversity and multi-culturalism, about being all things to all people. We want to be all-inclusive."
Bart's tickets are "different" than other subway systems' tickets or tokens as well (and way more expensive), using a color-coded system to inconvenience riders and rack up fares:
- Blue - good for two-way oral passage
- Red - good for "two-fisted anal passage"
- Green - good for one-trip express oral passage (non-refundable)
- Orange - good for oral, anal, or group passages (transferable)
- BART Plus (cream) - any way, anytime, my place or yours (condom included).
The color codes are based on riders' interests and the handkerchief codes popular among homosexual men, who, in San Francisco, make up approximately 90% of the total population of subway riders.
Ghost Trains
Another feature that makes Bart "different" from other subways is its many ghost trains which appear only on the system's computer screens but do not exist (at least in a material sense). Actual trains sometimes vanish from the monitors to balance the manifestations of the spirit trains. Riders can never be sure as to whether a real or a ghost train will (or won't) stop at a station, which makes the San Francisco subway one of the most unpredictable mass transit systems in the world. In the interests of safety, ghost trains may not travel faster than 25 miles per hour.
Unsafe At Any Speed
In spite of, or, perhaps, because of, Bart's many innovations, it is highly unsafe, which, once again, adds to the system's excitement and adventure. Trains tend to run off the ends of their tracks and are more flammable than most others. The subway tunnels, once believed to be resistant to earthquakes, have been found to need retro-fitting to make them safe from the effects of seismic activity, but one line, rumored to run through the bowels of one of the city's least desirable neighborhoods, won't be retro-fitted until AFTER an earthquake has occurred, leaving the tunnels, track, trains, and passengers at risk of being maimed or killed. Computer glitches and other equipment failures frequently leave passengers stranded, often for hours, on platforms or aboard trains stalled in tunnels. According to Wikipedia, the anal retentive encyclopedia, one series of such failures was so severe that it caused many passengers to defecate in their pants (i. e., to "self-evacuate"):
Faulty equipment was the cause of three of the delays, including the latest on July 12. In two of the delays, the fire of March 9 and the debris incident on June 20, passengers were so scared and frustrated, respectively, that they self-evacuated.
The only equipment that never fails is the ticket vending machine. Come hell or high water, earthquakes, famine, or floods, these one-armed bandits are always on duty, waiting to take passengers' money. Sometimes, the machines will even dispense a ticket in return.
Baltimore Subway
Baltimore, being a liberal enclave, had big plans for its subway, counting, as it was, on prodigious outlays of public funds from Big Government. Initially, planners envisioned a six-spoke wheel of subway lines that would radiate from the heart of the city in all directions, connecting the city with such distant points as Montreal, Canada, to the north; Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, to the south; Lisbon, Spain, to the east, and Tokyo, Japan, to the west. The two additional lines would run to New York City and Los Angeles, California.
Funding Fiasco
The floodgates of the U. S. Treasury were opened, and taxpayer money gushed into the project, but, after $1.392 billion had been spent, even the feds gave up, and only a single 15-mile line from Owings Mills to John's Hopkins Hospital was built, the pathetic project ending in a lopsided "U" shape that critics likened to the "grin of a vanishing Cheshire Cat's cache of federal dollars." So much for Baltimore's visions of grandeur.
Speedy Trips
A trip from one end of the line to the other takes about 30 minutes. Pedestriands can walk the same distance in half the time, which many do rather than pay the exorbitant fare of $160 (one way).
SRO on Dingy Cars
The system's original planners had envisioned luxury cars along the lines of the railroad's famous Pullman sleepers; instead, they were forced, by budget crises, to purchase dark, dingy cars with aluminum siding, worn upholstery, and poor lighting. They looked, critics contended, like old-fashioned mobile homes on tracks and did not inspire many to ride them from even one station to the next. Originally, each car could hold 76 seated and 90 standing passengers, but, to save money, the seats were removed, so now "standing room only" is the rule, with no exceptions, and each car can hold as many as 200 people, squeezed in like sardines.
Future Prospects? Bleak
There has been some talk, mostly discounted, of adding to the subway line. Maryland is toying with the prospect of adding 3 1/2 city blocks to the line so that it will reach a full mile in length, running from the southern terminus of the line to the northeast corner of the John's Hopkins Hospital, and they can rechristen it the "Green Mile," after the Stephen King novel, since, on maps, it is represented as a green line. However, these tentative plans remain just that--plans--for the foreseeable future, according to the mayor: "We have the vision and the will, but we don't have the tax base. Baltimore's not one of the most popular towns in the world, you know, for homebuyers or for tourists."
Washington, D. C. Subway
"There are two subways in Washington, D. C.," Senator Hillary Clinton told a group of her constituents during a recent visit by them to her chambers in the Capitol building. "Most people outside the Beltway are ignorant of this, as they are of most things, political and otherwise." The dual subway system, she said, is intended to provide public transportation for the masses and private, secure, luxurious transport for the legislative elite. "We'd rather ride with you, the public," Senator Clinton advised her listeners, "but, unfortunately, we must sacrifice our personal desires for personal safety, because we represent you."
Bilking the Public--An Age-old Practice
Most people, when they hear of a private transportation system for the servants of the American people wonder whether such measures are needed to protect those who serve, regarding this as a newfangled and presumptuous enterprise, Senator Clinton told her visitors. "Nothing could be further from the truth," she assured them:
"With regard to the financing of a private subway system for senators and congresspeople, The Congress has been abusing the American taxpayers since 1909, when an electric bus ferried legislators back and forth on their way between the senate office buildings. The bus was replaced in 1912, well in advance of the 1960's Civil Rights Act that resulted from Rosa Parks' refusal to sit in the back of a public bus, by a monorail with a wicker coach. Congress is, and always has been, forward-looking. Then, in 1960, my predecessors decided that the monorail wasn't good enough for them, and they replaced it with trolleys. The subway was installed 33 years later, well before I came to Washington, so, please, I had nothing to do with building the system. I just benefit from the foresight of others."
Separate But Equal Lines
According to the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), the Capitol Subway System (CSS) consists of three lines. Two (northern lines) service the Senate side of the Capitol building. The remaining (southern) line services the House of Representatives. "It is important that the two houses maintain separation of state," Senator Clinton maintained, explaining the need for the independent lines for the House and the Senate. "Otherwise, we might get some work done, which, of course, would not be in the interests of the American people."
"The People Mover"
The other subway, designed for mass transit, is, Senator Clinton said, "the people's subway. We like to call it the People Mover, although its actual designation is Metro." She and her colleagues are especially proud of it, she declared, "because it was designed and built by committee at taxpayer expense and had a total cost overrun of only 3.88 billion dollars." She is pleased with the appearance of the system, which, she said, "has an artsy look to it, something serene, but surreal, like Dick Morris." In her opinion, the Metro system looks far better than the Capitol subway, "but that's okay by me, since it is, after all, the people's transit system, and they deserve the very best that their taxes can buy. Frankly, there's nothing else like it in the world."
A Brutal Subway By Design
Architect Harry Wesse, of the Chicago mob, designed the Washington Metro Subway. The design and the construction of the project was financed by the federal government, which insisted that the gangland architect design the stairways, tunnels, and other features of the system according to the Brutalist architectural style that is prominent in the former Soviet Union and exhibits a cold, callous, and uncommunicative style. The government wanted its capitol city's subway to show the American people who is in charge, and officials believed that the stark, angular, and repetitive style of the Brutalists would get their point across and, at the same time, intimidate the nation's sheep-like citizenry.
Anti-American Subways (the Rest)
Several European and Asian countries have subways, but they are hopelessly outclassed by New York's system and, in some cases, by San Francisco's and Washington, D. C.'s subways as well, although many of the overseas subways do outstrip Baltimore's pitiful mass transit line.
London's Underground
London has a not-bad subway, but it's been around since 1863 and more than half (55% for anal retentive scholars) is aboveground, so, despite its name ("Underground"), only 45% of it, or approximately 126 miles, actually qualifies as subway, making it way smaller than the New York subway's 842 miles (only 40% of which, or 336.8 miles, runs aboveground. The Underground does have a cool logo, though, and an okay, maybe somewhat scary, name (reminiscent of the catacombs).
Second-rate Subway
The Underground cheats, though, with its boring circular tunnels that are only a little larger than the trains that pass through them rather than having the lavish, spacious tunnels that the more generous Americans construct. Even among the English themselves, the tunnels are ridiculed as "tubes." The Underground may gain a few points from the environmental wackos, however, for including murals that depict houses on facades constructed in the place of actual dwellings that were demolished to let the subway through.
An American to the Rescue
Not the brightest bunch in the human population, the English built a system that contained six incompatible lines, each operated by a different operator (both literal and financial). It was an American, of course, who came to the rescue: he bought one line, acquired others, and eventually forged a compatible and efficient system. As the lines were expanded, care was taken to ensure that the growing network of lines would continue to be compatible.
Limited Service Aboard Cheap Trains
The New York subway also beats the London Underground in the time that service is available: from 5:00 a. m. to 1:00 a. m . for the Underground, and 24 hours per day, 365 days per year, non-stop, for the New York system.
English subway trains are cheaper and cheaper-looking even than the dingy cars on the Baltimore subway. There are no seats, and riders must stand on risers along a long, otherwise empty car that stretches for hundreds of feet, looking as if they are riding a conveyor belt or an escalator rather than a train.
Serious About Fares
Riders who fail to buy tickets or to use them properly may face:
- Fine
- Imprisonment
- Dismemberment
- Execution
Suicide Pits
To encourage suicide, the London Underground includes deep pits under the subway stations whenever possible so that disgruntled or irate passengers can be helped to "fall" into a pit (or in front of an incoming train). As a result, complaints are rare and are seldom, if ever, twice repeated. English citizens invariably speak well of the Underground and are always happy to pay greater taxes to support the system, never knowing when they might need to ride a train and never knowing who might be on hand to asassist them in their efforts to "board" a train.
These intimidation tactics are highly effective, as Wikipedia points out:
"The London Underground network carries almost a billion passengers a year. It is one of the safest mass transport systems in the world, with just one fatal accident for every 300 million journeys."
Artistic Appearance
The Underground uses fancy brickwork to give itself an artistic appearance. Many walls include geometric figures that are created by the juxtapositions of bricks of different colors, often laid or set in a surreal or avante garde style. To ensure that everyone understands that the art is self-deprecating and ironic, some of the brickwork is constructed to resemble signs that bear such droll witticisms as "Way Out," referring to the art's unorthodox style.
Attempt at Cultivating the Masses
Wanting to be more than just a mass transit system, the Underground also seeks to promote the arts by displaying really bad amateur poetry on its poster and billboard space, both aboard the trains and at the stations, and by hiring minstrels, jugglers, mimes, and strippers to put on "free" shows on the system's major platforms. A sample poem shows how terrible the verse can be:
The Underground
Gets you around
The Underground
Takes you uptown
Or downtown
So, come on
Get down
With the Underground!
Paris Subway
Nobody but Frenchmen and Frenchwomen (and most Frenchkids) can read signs in the Paris subway because, for some reason (or no reason), everything is written in French! To make matters worse for the rest of the world, the system has 16 lines that are open every day from 5:00 a. m. until 1:00 a. m. (sometimes longer, according to the arbitrary and ever-changing schedules of the fickle-minded French).
No one, not even the French, understand how the system's tickets work, because the government uses hieroglyphics instead of French words to confuse passengers. As a result, most riders simply buy the most expensive ticket and ride as far as they can in whichever direction they're traveling and hope for the best. According to one report, a passenger embarked on a trip at the Saint-Lazare platform and ended up, somehow, in Dublin, Ireland. Unlike American subways, French underground mass transit trains are unreliable.
After inserting a ticket into a turnstile slot, the turnstile returns the ticket to the insertee. During the trip, which could take seconds or days, depending on where the train ends up, a conductor may demand to see the ticket. If its fare does not correspond to the distance and time of day that one is traveling, the passenger may be fined, arrested, imprisoned, flogged, or decapitated.
System Size
Once again, as usual, New York's subway system beats the foreign (in this case, French) system, the former having way more miles of tracks than Paris' paltry 133.7 miles. More people (1,336 billion!) ride the Paris subway than ride New York's trains, but that's because there are fewer automobiles in France than there are in New York (or even Buffalo, for that matter), so the Frenchies have no alternative, really. The only way they (or any other anti-American country) can beat the good ol' U. S. of A. is to cheat, by getting a head start on the United States or by denying people an alternative to subway transit or by some other unfair advantage. Still, in almost every way, America's subway systems, especially that of New York, are way, way better than foreign competitors'.
The Paris subway is about as safe as Paris Hilton, who was named for the mass transit system, is sane or modest. A fire, known as the Couronnes Conflagration and Disasterous Catastrophe (1903) killed 84 passengers; a runaway train injured 24 riders when it collided with the Notre-Dame-de-Lorette station (2000); and an electrical shortage caused a fire that "consumed" 19 passengers at the Simpleton station. Riding the subway rails in Paris is not recommended.
Moscow Subway
Strangely enough, Moscow's subway (yes, there really is one, nicknamed "Baghdad not on the Hudson") is built on the pattern of the swastika, the symbol of the feared and hated German Nazi party against which Russia, along with the rest of World War II allied powers, fought. According to Alexander Schwartzenittzenninngeringhofpmph, the principal architect of the system, the swastika was chosen as a pattern for the subway because "although historically and emotionally repulsive, is nearly perfect in terms of efficiency, especially with the Motherland's addition to its arms. Instead of the traditional four, ours has as many as we need at any point to ensure the quick and efficient running of our trains."
Extensive System
Like the communist government, the Moscow subway infiltrates nearly every square inch of the capitol city's underbelly, consisting of 12 lines and 172 stations. There's no way to hide or escape from the state-owned enterprise or its 8.2 million passengers per day. The radial lines are surrounded and kept in line by the outer circle of the connecting Koltsevaya Line. (Only top government leaders are allowed in the system's inner circle.)
Stalin's Ring
Without suspicion, the gullible Wikipedia "encyclopedia" repeats as fact what many in the international intelligence community believe to be a mere legend concerning the origin of the Moscow subway's outer circle:
"A group of engineers approached Stalin with plans for the Metro, to inform him of current progress and of what was being done at that moment. As he looked at the drawings, Stalin poured himself some coffee and spilt a small amount over the edge of the cup. When he was asked whether or not he liked the project so far, he put his cup down on the center of the Metro blueprints and left in silence. The bottom of the cup left a brown circle on the drawings. The planners looked at it and realized that it was exactly what they had been missing. Taking it as a sign of Stalin's genius, they gave orders for the building of the ring line, which on the plans was always printed in brown."
Cryptic Terminology
To prevent tourists and other non-nationals from knowing where they are and where, if anywhere, they may be going on the trains, the subway uses only Russian designations on its subway map, tickets, and schedules. Although officials claim that funny Russian words are merely the names of various stations along the way, CIA leaders contend that the so-called names are far too long to be "just names," and are most likely cryptic phrases by which the military and civilian authorities communicate secretly in the presence of foreigners, especially since the "names" of the stations change daily or even more often.
Missile Silos
A distinctive feature of the Moscow subway is its missile silos. During the Cold War, Russian workers dug especially deep as they were constructing part of the subway's Arbatskiy line. They claimed that they were doing so in order to provide bomb shelters for their comrades' safety in the event that the Yankee imperialist dogs (i. e., Americans) should engage the People's Republic in a nuclear war. The real purpose of the added depth was to install secret missile silos for the storage of the Soviet Union's own nuclear missiles.
Metro 2
Although Russian leaders deny the existence of a second subway system, for use solely by senior government and military officials, which connects the Kremlin with the Ministry of Defense, it is common knowledge, even among Soviet citizens, that this "Metro 2" exists. In fact, it has been mapped in detail by Rand McNally, makers of the famed road atlas.
Due to the relative stupidity and laziness of the average Russian worker and the use of shoddy construction materials, the Moscow subway is plagued with serious accidents on a frequent, routine basis. Such accidents, which regularly cripple, maim, and kill passengers and crews alike, include floods, fires, terrorist bombings, explosions, train collisions and other wrecks, escalator accidents, equipment malfunctions and failures, employee drunkenness, and accidents due to "human error."
Tokyo Subway
The Tokyo Subway is based on the principles of Feng Shui and the configuration of snakes that the emperor dropped while milking them for their venom in preparation for a "festival of the phallus." The subway, he decreed, must be "an incarnation in concrete and steel" of the tangled bodies of the serpents. Otherwise, he insisted, the gods would be insulted, and they would avenge themselves upon the subway workers, riders, and officials. Because of the welter of lines that turn back upon themselves, run over and under one another, and spiral around in circles to confound the planet's energy and mimic the snakes' bodies, it is possible to travel for miles and hours and return to the place that one first departed. Consequently, many Japanese employees never make it to work and schoolchildren miss much of their education.
Station Locations
Despite the subway map that appears in most stations, no one, including subway officials, really knows where the many lines go, and the government has begun to print charts of the system's stations that do not include a layout of the routes themselves. Here is a diagram of one of the more recent attempts to locate the stations, but it, like its predecessors, is highly unreliable. Commuters are advised to forget the Tokyo subway altogether and to walk or take a bus or taxi to their destinations.
American subways are the best, ethnocentricism be damned!