text: How to deal with pressure to lose weight for your wedding #Friends & Family Advice#body image#boundaries#conflict resolution#mother of the bride#plus size Updated Jan 26 2017 (Posted Aug 27 2012) Ariel arielmstallings I am not a skinny girl, and I have been trying to justify loving myself as I am, feeling beautiful in the body I have and trying to accept my body no matter what size. My boyfriend (who wants to propose this year) loves me the way I am, and I love him the way he is. But I have serious anxieties about my mother scrutinizing my weight all through the engagement process… "No wedding dresses are going to look attractive on you if you don't lose a good XX pounds!" "MOM!" "Well, it's true." If my mother criticizes me and doesn't stop, how do I deal with it? How do I tell her to back off without pissing her off or giving her a brush-off answer? -Sarah Hoo boy. We all know that weight loss is a hot button issue in women's publications, and it's one we normally avoid on Offbeat Bride. We avoid it not because it isn't important, but because it's incredibly pervasive and talked about everywhere — and I don't think it should be tied to wedding planning. As we say in the Code of Conduct for our Offbeat Bride Tribe members: No weight-loss/negative body image talk This is a touchy subject, and without a doubt our most controversial rule: The Tribe is not the place to talk about weight loss, or negative body image. Too many wedding communities are overtaken by unhealthy, triggering discussions, and our aim on the Tribe is to promote positive attitudes of self-acceptance. We are about celebrating all body shapes, sizes, and abilities, and encourage our members to find ways not to snark or talk negatively about their own bodies. We discourage insulting anyone's body — and includes your own! I am all for making the decision to lose weight — but strongly believe the decision should NOT have anything to do with A) wedding planning, or B) pressure from others, even family members who love you. That said, I do have two potential communication strategies for how you could handle this situation with your mother. The quick boundary Related Post 7 ways to keep "Momthulhu" from hijacking your wedding plans Before the Bridethulhu, there was the Momthulhu: wrecker of peaceful wedding planning, stirrer of pots, and thwarter of offbeat ideas. Maybe you have one? Maybe... Read more The next time the issue comes up, simply tell your mother "It means so much to me that you care so much about me. That said, I hope you can respect that I've put a lot of thought into this issue, and honor the fact that I've made a different decision than you might. Please trust my ability to make choices about my body that work best for me. I don't want to talk about this any more." If she presses the issue, make the line very clear: "Again, I really appreciate that this means so much to you, but I've told you where I stand on the issue. If you bring it up again, I'm going to have to end this conversation." If she pushes it again, try this: reach out and hold her hand in yours (if that feels right), look into her eyes and say, "I love you, and I'm done talking about this." Then get up, and walk the fuck away. Lather, rinse, and repeat as the issue comes up. I know it feels harsh (…walk away?) but really all you're doing is articulating that A) you love her, B) you hear her, C) you're clear about where you stand on the issue, and willing to draw very clear boundaries around talking about it. The longer discussion Related Post I'm a fat bride I recently posted on Facebook that I want anything emblazoned with "bride" to be changed to "fat bride." My identity as a fat woman is... Read more Ok, so maybe you want to use this as an opportunity to have a longer discussion about the issue. That's awesome, if you've got the energy for it. (I'm not sure I would, if I were in the thick of wedding planning.) Here are the conversation tools I'd use: First, recognize that your mother is coming from a place of concern — however misguided it may be. She wants you to look pretty and feel good and be healthy — all things you likely want too (even if you disagree with how to get there). Frame all conversations around recognizing this common ground. Pick a few of your favorite self-identified plus-size brides from our site to show your mother. Show her clear examples of how beautiful and happy brides of ALL sizes look on their wedding days. Talk about the feelings that come up for you when she talks about weight loss and your wedding. Does it make you feel like she doesn't support you? Does it bring up feelings of fear around her being disappointed in you? Avoid blame ("You make me feel sad!"), but articulate the emotions that come up after these conversations. Share the process you've gone through to get to the place of body positivity. Tell her about what makes you feel confident and good in your body. Give her clear ideas about how she could contribute to those feelings. Read together — print out a few posts from our body image archive, and talk over what you relate to there, and what you disagree with. I also highly recommend the Fat Bride Survival Guide, written by an Offbeat Bride we featured in 2008. Related Post Psychology Today: Fighting the Unhealthy Cultural Push for Wedding Weight Loss I've written in the past about the pressure put on so many brides to lose weight for their weddings (and how I suggest people handle... Read more I'd love to hear from brides who've dealt with this issue: how do you deal with pressure from family? I want to be very, VERY clear here: I'm not interested in hearing about whether anyone should or should not lose weight for their wedding. That's a personal decision, and not one that people on the internet have any place telling you how to make. What I want to hear from y'all about is this: if someone has made the decision NOT to lose weight, how can they constructively deal with pressure from friends, families, or vendors? Ariel Author of three editions of the Offbeat Bride book and the forthcoming From Shitshow To Afterglow, Ariel Meadow Stallings acts as the publisher of all the Offbeat Empire websites. She lives in Seattle with her son, and if she's not reading or writing books, chances are good that she's dancing or happy-crying. She writes weekly essays for her new publication, The Afterglow. PREVIOUS Joyful jumping, kilted men, and the starriest night ever NEXT Julie & Paul's farm fresh and sassy wedding Show/Hide comments [ 142 ] June of last year, I decided I was tired of having zero energy, and I was going to do something about it. I started eating healthier, and forced myself to start going to a gym. In October, my BF became my fiance. This had NOTHING to do with my new eating habits or exercise program. He had just gotten out of the hospital after a 12 day stay for apendicitis and realized we don't always get all the time we think we will. He decided he didn't have to come up with the perfect proposal and just asked. It was the perfect proposal because it was a complete surprise (I love surprises!) and it came from the heart. The problem I've had during my wedding planning is not people telling me I need to lose weight for the wedding. It's been their assumption that the weight I've been losing as I've been eating healthier is due to the wedding. I have explained countless times that I'm not trying to lose weight for my wedding, I'm trying to eat healthier and work out more to improve my self image and to live a healthier life. I try to take a gentle approach when I explain this. "Actually, I hadn't even thought about losing weight for the wedding, I was just tired of being tired all the time." This tends to make most people change how they're looking at it. There have been some that persist in asking how the wedding weightloss is coming along, and I've started to either ignore the question or simply say "I'm not losing weight for the wedding." and change the subject. My response to that question depends entirely on who is asking it. I've seen a LOT of good information already about how people have dealt with this question. Much of it is better than my two cents, but I can only talk about my situation. I'm not skinny, and I'm never going to be. I AM much more comfortable in my skin than I was last year in June but I think that has more to do with the energy I have now that I'm eating better for my metabolic rate. I was fortunate that my family didn't even mention my weight when they heard about the engagement. I do wish I'd known some of these things before. It would have made holidays more enjoyable with the more judgey members of my Southern family. Reply Like you, I started to change my lifestyle around the time I got engaged. I started eating well, and I challenged myself to run a half marathon. At the same time, I started losing weight. I was so tired of people telling me "good job for losing weight for the wedding" when in reality, the weight loss was just a byproduct of this whole self-empowerment journey I started. Each time a person mentioned my wedding and new lifestyle in the same breath, I felt like they were erasing my agency to determine my own motivation. It was really frustrating, and at times, those comments actually threatened to de-rail the pro-empowerment, kick ass attitude I was maintaining about my new fitness routine. But I stayed strong, and honestly, finishing that half-marathon was probably one of my greatest accomplishments because I did it for ME and not for my partner, society, or anyone else. Reply When I got engaged I confess I started looking at myself in terms of "how will I look in a wedding dress, in photos that will last forever?". However, I am actually glad I did, if only because that was my wake-up call that I really had gotten unhealthily large. I honestly didn't realize it before. Sure, I kept having to buy new clothes, and didn't like the way I looked in anything, but I never had before anyway, and nobody was calling me fat, so I just… didn't realize. So I started losing weight and exercising a little, and I felt wonderful and empowered and all the things that come with being a healthy weight. But then the tables turned again and I started making my goal a date (the wedding) instead of a feeling or a ratio (BMI) or something. I started telling myself I had to lose X pounds by this date. Which was a good motivator for me, but then left me feeling relieved and done with health management after the wedding. I gained almost everything back after the wedding, because I had made that my goal instead of a healthy lifestyle. Argh! So now I have to try to motivate myself back to health again. Ah well. I am learning to love my body without becoming accepting of my health problems, mostly with help from OBB, so hopefully I can feel pretty but still motivated to be healthy. 🙂 Reply "Being fat at the holidays" link up-thread, and this discussion thread have been eye-opening for me. If you switch out "fat" for "divorced", then you have the essence of every interaction with my mother, and even a relative stranger or three–essentially, people who feel strangely comfortable judging you and your life. I guess the whiff of "failure" is too tantalizing to resist; some folks seem to delight in projecting their own relationship fears by forecasting my own (repeated) doom. So though I'm not plus-sized, I found this discussion very helpful and surprisingly applicable to my own wedding stresses. Thanks for this. Reply In struggling with my weight, my mother has made some pretty crass, judgmental, rude, and totally hurtful comments. Coming from a place of love where she thinks she's supporting me! I had spent WEEKS dreading a trip back to my hometown to visit, because we invariably go shopping (usually sharing a fitting room if they were busy or just to skip the step of walking out to say "what do you think of this?") and I knew she was going to make commentary about the weight I had gained since the last time she saw me. I was psyching myself up for a big long discussion, I wanted so badly for her to understand that I RECOGNIZED that she was just trying to be helpful, but that I was on the verge of triggering an eating disorder and I didn't need her to help me get there. I stepped out of a fitting room to ask her opinion and said, "Mom, I need your thoughts on how this fits me without making judgey comments about my body." She was clearly taken aback, but THAT WAS ALL THAT WAS SAID! And a year and a half later, there have been no comments about my body, and questions about me going to exercise have been phrased JUUUST differently enough to be noticeable, with a much less aggressive, accusatory, guilt-inducing tone of voice. All that anxiety and it was a flippant, off-hand comment that made the moment work without hurt feelings. It totally could have gone the other way, but I lucked out. I was sure we were going to revert back to our relationship when I was 14 because I totally felt like a petulant child when I said it–but she took it as an adult setting boundaries and it worked! If you think your relationship can handle it, a seemingly off-hand comment that's direct but not "picking a fight" might be the way to go (although mine was totally picking a fight so I don't necessarily recommend it!). I think ultimately *I* would have been happier with a more in-depth discussion, because I still worry that I made my mom feel bad. So, to each their own. Reply Wow, the number of replies to the original post just goes to show how much we young women share in common! I didn't feel pressure to lose while approaching my wedding (which was last week 😉 ), but I did put on a couple of pounds. Stress and being unwell meant that I was unable to maintain my normally active lifestyle. On my wedding day I still managed to feel good about myself, and it was mostly because I was marrying my sweetie and because I had all of the people I love most in the same place to celebrate (and party) with me. With this in mind, I was joyful and totally let any of my body image stuff go. I also had a second dress to put on later in the evening, and that happened to help a whole lot as well! 😉 It was an outdoor wedding, and though gorgeous, it was hotter than the hubs of hell being in a wedding dress all day. I had the second dress for 'just in case' I felt gross later on, which I did, and I could change into something equally as beautiful as my wedding dress, but more colorful, and comfortable! I was surprised how good I felt about myself after I slipped away and changed, to make my second reveal of the night! No one knew I had the extra dress, so it was a surprise, and I got many more compliments about how pretty I looked. How could that be bad?!? Ironically, I had more of a struggle with body image on my honeymoon than I did at the wedding. Now that I'm back to normal life (ie non-planning mania), I feel an urgency to get my life back under control. Settling into a healthy, active lifestyle is my focus now. At least it's not as daunting as planning a wedding (to me, anyhow)! Reply About 2-3 years ago, I lost a lot of weight. I stopped working towards my goal weight/fitness and went back to school with about 15 lbs or so left to shed. I ended up taking this summer off and decided to use my new free time to get crackin–I enjoy being fit and active and it was great to have the time to work on my goals. Problem is, I'm now engaged. I have a big ol ring on my left hand or on a chain around my neck and that apparently kills any desire for self improvement/change for the sake of improvement/change–it must be because of the wedding. Every trainer I've talked to, every fellow gym person I've talked to, even my friends and family and future in laws–they all say something like "Oh! So you've got a dress to fit into then? Good for you for getting a head start!" WHAT THE FUCK. It makes me so stabby that because I happen to be planning a wedding, anything I decide to do with myself, my life and my body must be focused on that. The rest of my life up until now was just killing time until the Big Day. I hate the pressure to be thin and perfect and I hate the idea that I'm just working towards being a motherfucking princess and that I'm incapable of thinking, doing or planning anything not wedding related for the next 11 months. Reply I am so with you on this. I'm in the same situation, I lost a lot of weight in the past year for my own health-related reasons, and got engaged a month ago and I'm finding myself involuntarily swept up in the whole "losing weight for the wedding" garbage. Drives me crazy that it's so ingrained into our culture to assume that I couldn't possibly be doing it for reasons other than "fitting into" (ugh I hate that phrase) a wedding dress. Reply My parents have long been concerned about my health, even before I was overweight, because my grandma had diabetes and they are afraid that I will get it, too. And I certainly don't want to get it! The trouble is that the way my parents broach the subject of my weight, it always manages to make me feel worse about myself, which makes me rebel and want to eat even more. It doesn't help that my parents are both very active (their retirement helps with that) and my mom and my aunt have both been losing weight with Weight Watchers. I feel like I am under constant assault by reminders about weight from them. Now that I am engaged, there is extra (though subtle) pressure from my family to lose weight. My mom, for instance, made a comment about how I should maybe wait to get measured for my dress, "in case you lose any weight." While this was more positive than saying "in case you gain any weight," the comment was still very loaded, implying that the way I am right now is not good enough. I also felt awful at the bridal shops I went to. David's Bridal had nothing in my size, but if I wanted to order something to my measurements, I would have to pay for it up front, and if I didn't like the result, I'd only get store credit. I didn't want to risk it. At the other stores I went to, the dresses were all multiple sizes too small for me, and I felt like I was being stuffed into a straightjacket with every dress I tried on. So much for that "you'll fall in love with your dress" dream! But in addition to the traditional wedding dresses, I also tried on a large number of bridesmaid dresses. I found a knee-length one that I really like, which very much my style (modern, but with a retro feel), has a fitted waist and flared skirt that flatters my curves, and can be ordered in pretty much any color, including ivory. Plus it costs far less than a "real" wedding gown. I tried the dress on in dark blue, so it will be a surprise to me to finally try it on in ivory once it arrives. My mom lives across the country from me, and I emailed her pictures of me trying it on. I also deliberately sent pictures of me in dresses that were much too small, so that the contrast was even more evident, highlighting that the non-traditional dress is far more flattering than the traditional ones. My parents offered to help pay for a weight-loss plan, and I finally decided to let them help me, but under my own terms. I told them that I want to do an online program where I can manage my weight myself, rather than feeling obligated to other people's ideas of what I should be doing, and I told them that I need positive encouragement, not negative nagging. I also emphasized that I am doing this for me, not for my wedding, not for anyone else's ideas of how I should look in my wedding dress, etc. My fiance loves me just as I am, and thinks my body is incredibly sexy, so I am not doing it for him, either. I did, however, set myself a goal: we want to go hiking in Europe either for our honeymoon next year, or soon thereafter. My goal is to be able to comfortably hike several miles a day for a couple of weeks in a row. No set weight. No set size. Just something that lets me have more fun exploring with my soon-to-be husband. Reply People are SO nosy about it, no matter your size. I'm 6ft tall and 160lbs, putting me at about a size 8 or so. I have a little tummy flab and I've got some serious baby-birthing-hips, but I'm not really a big girl. I had a customer of mine ask "So, how much weight did you lose for your wedding?" Wait.. what? Um, none? Reply There is a whole movement of Fat Admirers (who refer to themselves as "FA") who are slowly coming out of the woodwork. Maybe your mom could check out some of those websites and get a feel for how the negative comments make people who love fat people (and fat people themselves!) feel. She obviously thinks she's helping, and might just need a new point of view. My mom put me on my first diet when I was 7 years old, and it's been an uphill battle since then. I'm 30 now, and she's mostly given up… but we haven't been dress shopping yet. I AM getting lots of static from my friends though, which makes me wonder why it's ok for me to go about daily life being overweight, but not ok to be overweight on this ONE DAY? =/ Whatever. Reply I find turning it around works quite well (though is a little rude). When people ask if you are trying to loose weight for the wedding, hold their hand, look into their eyes and say, "I'm so sorry, is everything ok at home? Because verbal abuse is still abuse. My partner loves me the way I am an doesn't need me to change, don't ever let anyone try and change you." It makes them realize how hideous they sound, and you don't get shouty! 🙂 Reply I'm getting married in four weeks. I chose not to diet. There are several reasons why, but the main one is this: I've witnessed several friends lose weight for their weddings, then put it back on again afterwards and beat themselves up about it…for years. "I now weigh two stone more than I did on my wedding day *sob*." I don't want to be comparing myself to an unrealistic, unsustainable 'wedding-day weight' for the rest of my life. Reply Erh.Merh.Garrhhhh. Or rather, OhMyGod, look at all these posts. A nerve's been hit. And I know I'm not alone in my worries. I have always struggled to love myself because of my weight. My boyfriend of nine years proposed last summer when my mother was sick and dying. We were out walking our dog, and it was Mother's Day weekend. He had to hurry home to go back to work, and he popped the question. My first answer was "Yes!" My second answer was "Yes, but…is it just because of the cancer?" He assured me it wasn't, though I doubted it for months after. I said I wanted to ask for my mother's blessing. When we got back with the dog, we said we had big news. Mom looked expectant. David told her and she stood right up as if she was as fit as ever. She hugged us both and we gave her flowers from the mountainside, and she rushed to find her old rings in exchange. But as some dire weeks passed, she also sat up late at night watching "Say Yes To The Dress" and showing her open disgust at plus-sized brides-to-be, letting me know if I was to be married, I'd better not disappoint her beyond the grave. "When I die, don't get fat!" she said. "I know you're easily depressed!" I didn't know if I'd shared extra stressful news with her along with the reality of her condition. Maybe we shouldn't have told her about our engagement? She was dying…but I might get fat and look ugly in some dumb frock from David's Bridal. And there was no time for a quick wedding what with our plans to get Mom home for a final visit to Finland, where she hadn't visited in ten years since her own Mom's passing, and our hands were full already organizing hospice and preparing ourselves to understand and communicate with hospice services abroad. The good/bad news is she made it home and died there. I think it's what she wanted, though I can't be sure. Maybe she got all caught up in the barn-raisin' atmosphere of "get Mama home" and never felt brave enough to speak up for what she really wanted. Maybe it all felt like a train speeding out of control. But now, just over a year past her loss, I feel terribly guilty for getting married…and getting fat. I got her old dress out of the bottom of a box. She'd never showed it to me to hope about because she was always thinner. It upset me to hear that my awesome friend, a dressmaker doing me such a huge kindness in tailor making my dress so that I don't even have to know what the hell size I am, had to "block" the lace sleeves to expand them. I thought, "Mama would be so disappointed." It took months to get it started, but I'm now going to a bereavement group. It seems odd to do this in tandem with wedding planning but at least I feel I have a place ot put my grief and not just feel guilty about the bittersweetness of honoring a sacrament of marriage without her. I know I should be talking about body issues but body and spirit are to me the same. I'd love to see some posts on Offbeat Bride about honoring loved ones who've passed away. Right now I feel the only way to honor Mom would be to magically become the 30- or 40-pounds lighter person she thought I'd be if I'd just put down the comfort food for a while. Yes, the self-loathing is just so tiresome and I'm sorry to risk posting it here, as I respect the Tribe's statements at the time I joined. But equally tiresome is the pressure from comments of "Oh, you'll be so beautiful on your big day!" when you just don't believe it, and here, I'm seeking some support on that. Sometimes I just want to hear the truth: You're very organized, and thanks for getting out your invitations on time. No pressure to be pretty! Reply My mom and I have been at war over my weight since forever. So I was prepared for the weight loss pressure when my fella produced an engagement ring. I chose to not try to lose weight for a lot of reasons… Very top of the list, he fell in love with me and my curves the way we look now. So I knew what his vote would be. Then I started making my DIY list. OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I'm a professional floral designer, broke and crafty. We were paying for this shindig ourselves, so I was out to save every dime I could. All the decorations and flowers were my babies. We had an outdoor ceremony and an indoor reception, so some of the decorating could be done the night before, but the bride was still up at 6am decorating a gazebo the morning of. Plus, we home catered. A dessert buffet. I made several things I had never made before, and everything had to be tasted. (Filled cakeballs decorated like hand dipped chocolates, baklava, bite sized cheesecakes, Italian Creme Cake………and lots more) We had a full on BBQ dinner, most of which was made the night before. Who needed all the pressure of weighing, counting calories and all that? Besides, on a short notice, I bought my awesome, first choice, gotta have it dress secondhand at a great deal. So my goal became maintaining my weight so that it wasn't too tough for my amazing cousin to make it fit like a glove. I threw in some fire engine red accessories and felt like a 1940s movie star as I walked down the aisle. DH had tears in his eyes, and our nephew was whispering that I looked beautiful, what else can a girl ask for? Reply This is a wonderful article and a legitmate concern! I'm a bride to be, and while no one is pushing me to lose weight, I have been beating myself up about losing weight for the wedding because I want to look and feel beautiful – and I want to enjoy my photos. I saw this posted on Facebook the other day, and reading it nearly made me cry. It's a blog post from a photographer, who makes such an incredible point, it's really helped me change how hard I am on my own self-image! http://myfriendteresablog.com/so-youre-feeling-too-fat-to-be-photographed/ I highly, HIGHLY recommend it! It's eye opening and profound. Reply I'm overweight. I get given reserved seats in public transportation a lot, because people think I'm pregnant. It's not like I don't care, but I had made the decision of not trying to lose it before the wedding. ALL women I interacted with during the wedding preparation told me I HAD to lose weight, with the sole exception of the vendor who sold me my dress (other vendors said something on the lines of "should" rather than "have"). My vendor actually asked me to maintain my weight, so there wouldn't be problems with the dress fitting. To all the others (including mom and mother-in-law) I simply, but forcefully, said "I don't have to and I won't lose weight. My guy loves me the way I am, he doesn't need me to be thinner to think I'm pretty". After a few times of this, they stopped bugging me. With the vendors who told me they thought they didn't have dresses that would look good on me, or pressured me to try pregnancy wedding dresses, I just showed them: I would insist on trying on dresses that I liked, rather than the ones they chose, and to their amazement they would look good on me. Because, like you say, brides are beautiful, no matter their weight! So my advice is: if you decide your weight is the one you're taking with you on your wedding day, say so and say it as frequently as needed. Avoid being bitchy (it's super hard, sometimes, especially when you're being told the same thing for the 20th time!) but show your decision has been made and nothing will make you change your mind. Rock that gorgeous bod with pride! Reply Wow. What a great article. I guess I just grew up with a different mind-set. I can't imagine my mother telling me I need to loose weight to look good in a wedding dress. This time in your life is already stressful enough, there's no need to add any extra stresses on your life because of somebody else's opinion. I am a wedding photographer and have seen all shapes and sizes and can tell you 100%, every bride I have seen is beautiful. Every bride has that amazing glow about her on the day of her wedding, and your photos will show this. Screw what anyone else thinks. As long as you're happy, that's all that matters. Never change anything about you for anyone but yourself. Reply I love this post. I am a plus size bride marrying in December. I have always been curvy but over the last few years piled on quite a bit more weight due to some health issues. My partner loves me exactly the way I am, but my mother keeps pestering me about how i will get some weight off before the wedding. To be honest, I would love to loose some weight, but I am not going to go on a diet, I am eating healthy, watching portion size and exercising. My 18 year old son is annorexic and I don't ever want to show him that weight defines who I am. I am having my dress made and the dress maker, bless her heart, told me my curves are to be celebrated. I will look great in a dress made for me! Reply I think wedding planning was the only time in my entire life that mum didn't hound me to lose weight which I found very refreshing and I think I still expected it from her the entire time. Honestly I'm plus sized and what ever I did I was still going to be plus sized and well I had a wedding to plan. A lot of other people (including most of his family) talking to me about dieting to fit into a dress but I pointed out how silly it was in my circumstances to add extra pressure to myself to try and fit into a dress that didn't fit me or to buy a dress a size smaller hoping I would fit into it by the wedding. In fact I had bought a dress a size larger, with a corset so I didn't need to worry about it. Most of them shut up after that. I was worried about the dress shopping too. I ended up ringing around dress shops to ask what sized dresses they had on the rack for me to try on. I only went to shops that had my size or larger. I found some awesome dresses and actually had a hard time deciding which one I loved more. I actually had a far bigger problem with my bridesmaid dresses. All the bridesmaids are much smaller than I am but most of them were blessed with significant cleavage that needed the dress to cover bras (strapless was not going to happen). The shops were far less accommodating for bridesmaids that for brides (despite it meaning more money because of the number of bridesmaids). We ended up having to get their dresses made as we couldn't find anywhere that had dresses that would fit them all. Reply My first wedding was full of negative body image issues from all sides. I was told by the grooms grandmother that I was too big for the dress that I was wearing. I was told by my mother & the groom's that I should choose other bridesmaids because they would make my pictures ugly (we had my pregnant sister and my ex's best friend of the time who was a big gal). I did not handle those productively, I just told them to get over it (pretty much in those exact words) and did what I wanted anyways. My dress fit & our pictures turned out fine. This time around it started last year when my fiance's sister got married. She asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding, which I agreed to do. She never said anything about my size (I'm a petite XL, usually between a 12-16 depending on brand, so I tend to look even bigger), when she was dress shopping she started talking about how she needed to get rid of a few pounds (mind you she is already a size 4) and all of her other bridesmaids were also super skinny. I felt a lot of pressure, even though nobody SAID anything, to be tiny. Finally, I explained to her that her negative body image and self-hate was making me feel uncomfortable. She stopped saying anything around me. I still looked like I was in a big gray sack at her wedding, I blame the dress choice, not my body! Fast forward to this year and my wedding, she still said nothing to me about my weight or anything, but began to bug her brother about "getting fit" for the wedding. He doesn't have any health problems related to his weight, so we all knew what she was talking about. He told her to drop it, but I don't think she ever will. Funny anecdote: While dress shopping with future mother-in-law we came across a very skinny bride (even smaller than her daughter, probably a 1 or 0) who was talking about dropping weight. My fml turned around, at David's Bridal and said to a complete stranger, "If you lose any weight, there won't be anything left!" Then proceeded to pick out dresses for fsl to try on. I lost it! Not to say there is anything wrong with being skinny either, that is. Reply I love this post and am totally choked up reading it. I am a plus size bride too, I get married September 2014. I bought a beautiful dress 2 years ago in a bridal sale. It was a bit tight at the time but I figured it would be fine for when I needed it. Fast forward to now and I am freaking out that I will never fit it. I have various health problems that have caused me to gain weight, plus a mother that thinks I need to be skinny to be a perfect bride because after all 'you need to look at those pictures for the rest of your life Kirsty'. Its awful that we let other people and their monsters into our heads and hurt us but it is so difficult when that person is your mother. Whenever she mentions it I just feel like eating a massive bit of cake! The wedding industry attitude generally sucks but I'm so glad I found you guys, real people who know every bride looks awesome no matter what she weighs! Reply Since getting engaged I've had multiple people not offer me dessert because they assume I'm dieting. When I have dessert or in general when people make comments about my wedding weight, I just tell them "I'm working on it." The fact of the matter is that people don't know what you do when they're not around. I go to the gym 3 times a week because it makes me feel healthy not because I'm "losing weight for the wedding. So if I want to have dessert by golly I'm gonna get it. Let people know you have a handle on your weight. Even if that means you are doing nothing because you are happy with your self. Reply I'm a bigger bride and the trying on dresses I think was the hardest part especially in wedding dress world where a size 18 in reality is a wedding size 26!!! (That was a bit hard to swallow). Its just hit new years so I keep being asked by vendors and random people I meet if my new years resolution is to lose weight for the wedding in 8 months. At first it hurt, I wondered why people were so mean and if I should lose more weight. And then I realizes these people where taking away from the happiest moment of my life. So I have now ordered my dress in the size I am currently and thats awesome because the more weight I lose the more it will cost for my dress to be altered, I'm not going to give in to the pressure of everyone else and my budget couldnt handle it either 🙂 Reply Mothers can be VERY hard without really mean it. I wasn't a plus size bride (I'll send in our wedding soon!), I had my dress custom made, and that didn't stop my mom from telling me that I should lose weight… in front of my seamstress at the very first try of what my dress would be. My seamstress looked at her, then looked at me, and said (mouth full of pins, mind you), "you are gorgeous NOW". After nagging me every time we talked in those months, when we reached the 1-month-to-go mark, we talked on the phone and she told me that the ONLY thing I needed was to lose 3 kilos and I was good to go. And I exploded. Apparently, my intent of reasoning (while sobbing in anger) that she had been telling me that I wasn't going to be pretty on my wedding day… well, she thought that I was nervous, not that I was right >_< so she changed the weight issue with "are you calmer, honey?" (FYI, I also lost weight the week before the wedding and my skirt was too loose. My mom was thrilled). Now I'm pregnant. I told her my weight pre pregnancy and her first reaction was asking me to put on 12 pounds max. Calmly, I told her that I would put on whatever I needed to because I was making a person. She still asks me to not get too fat from time to time. So, a LOT of patience and love for you. It's their issue and you don't have to put up with it. Don't let them get you down, you are your own beautiful independent adult person, and you know what to do to be happy. And in the middle of a stressful time juggling with guests and vendors, if what makes you happy is ice cream, GO FOR IT. Please. Reply This article has given me a lot to think about. I'm plus-size and have a number of health issues that mean its difficult to loose weight as I don't have the energy a lot of the time to exercise which is feeding into the guilt. I have been using my wedding (in 3 years time) as a motivation to get to a healthy weight long before I need to go dress shopping. I've already decided I'm having my dress made but I did want to go and do the trying on dresses thing to see what suits me first as I never got that opportunity for my first wedding, I was forced into wearing a beige blazer, blouse and skirt by my Mother as I was 3 months pregnant with my now 20 year old and was made to feel like I didn't deserve the wedding dress of my dreams My darling beautiful daughter who is one of my bridesmaid, is also of a similar build and has the same underlying health issues as me and I've caught myself recently making the same negative comments to her that my Mother and Grandmother said to me when I was her age. I need to find a more body positive way of talking to her about both of us getting healthy for the sake of being healthy. I thought I'd got to the point where I had accepted that my gorgeous naturally skinny fiancé loves me for me but I suspect that deep down I still feel that he's only saying it because he loves who I am rather than what I look like and I need to get past that as I wouldn't want to change him in any way so why should the reverse be true? The reasoning behind that is probably months and months of counselling but fundamentally lies in my relationship with my Mother where I was always made to feel that I never was quite good enough for her expectations and therefore don't deserve to feel good about myself. It was a tempestuous relationship to say the least, although I loved her dearly and now she's not here and neither is my beloved Nan, I'm guilting myself into meeting their expectations for once. Reply The first step toward changing is admitting. It's hard to break away from the habits we were taught as children, but I'm glad you recognize and want to change how you speak to your daughter about your bodies. Keep up the positive thinking! Reply I recently went through this same issue with my own mother. She's been passive-aggresively bugging me about it for a couple years (along with getting married and having kids—you know, cause I'm not getting any younger -_-) but once that ring went on my finger it was like she finally had free range to say I needed to lose weight every time she saw me. Now, I'm one of those people who believes in loving yourself and your body no matter what. And in all honesty, I've watched my mom go from diet to diet my entire life, and while she might lose 10-15 pounds here or there, she's pretty much always been the same shape/size. I am now also that size/shape. My aunt is, my cousin is. It's just what we're meant to look like. I've come to grips with that (this is not to say it doesn't hurt when my mom criticizes me). I, like the questioner, also did not want to spend the entire planning process being berated and criticized, so I took a stand early. It only took 2-3 times for it to sink in for her—so if your arguement doesn't work at first don't be discouraged, stand your ground. I simply explained that I accept my body the way it is, that my fiance loves me the way I am, and that there are a million other things for me to stress about for this wedding, I don't want my weight to be one of them. Also, I'm going to be wearing a corset on my wedding day, so I will look thinner no matter what 😉 After I explained it a few times she started to realize #1) I wasn't going to change my mind and #2) that she hadn't liked when her mother had said/done such things to her (and she never wants to be her mother!) Reply I am not skinny. I am not obese. I'm the in between that nothing fits. Cute tank tops from Hot Topic or dresses from Torrid. They don't make a store for me…shopping has always been a struggle. Now that I'm engaged why is there so much pressure? This is what I look like…why do I HAVE to fit into this image? I've struggled all my life with weight and today I'm the heaviest I've been, and also the most loved by my fiance. I'm not giving in…He loves me like this so I too need to love me like this too. And there's nothing more I love than to see women on this site not fitting in the standard and marching to their own beautiful, wonderful beat. Reply This is a really well written article that shows love and respect not only for yourself but for those issuing offensive opinions. A family member of mine's motto is always she would rather that I hear critiques from her than others as it would hurt less. A sweet sentiment but hard to remember when your hearing judgement. I've suffered with an eating disorder since my early teens, and 2 years ago started to make very good decisions and progress with regards to my body. People think it's appropriate to imply that – even though I work out regularly and eat a healthy diet – my normal behaviors mean I'm going to make myself sick before my wedding. It's hard to combat because a) I know they are concerned about me getting hurt, the same way a mother of a plus sized bride might say something insensitive for fear her daughter will have a horrible experience as a result of her size and b) I feel like i don't have a defense. I was anorexic, you never really stop being unwell you just work hard to combat it. But these comments of "don't make yourself sick" diminish my hard work trying to achieve the exact thing they are recommending. I look forward to holding hands with the next person who says it and saying "I love you and I understand this comes from a place of concern, but I'm done with this conversation" Reply I'm really a bit jealous to everyone of you who can at least reason with their moms and others with their loving advice. In my case, I question the love behind the advice as much as the fact that there can be any reasoning other than "just shut it". I come from a rather toxic family and my mom has quite a history with eating disorders of her own. Basically, "dieting" has been part of my vocabulary probably before I even went to school; a fact that has not stopped me from fluctuating between BMI's 16 to 35ish. I personally have gotten a hold of myself and my weight issues only around my thirties and still suffer extremely bad body image issues every now and then. My mom has never, ever, ever hidden the fact that she is one of those who just adore the skinny people and I will never get away with that. I'm not obese, but still ratheron the big side simply since I'm over 6ft tall, muscular with a big butt, strong thighs and… LOVING IT. So is my FH, what a surprise. I'm not getting a long dress and that has been a conversational piece number one("but your thighs"), rivaled only with conversations on how would "the weight" go ("oh, body cleanse diet", "oh oh! lemon juice!")… Well, you get the picture. The thing is, I do understand that this is some really twisted way of just thinking that well, she wants to be pretty, but it comes out in SUCH a toxic and violating way because of my mothers own eating disorders that are probably still very much present in her. If someone else knows a good way to talk this through, other than my already signature-like "mom, my life, my choice, just stfu", I'm open but the real cure would probably be a couple of year's worth of therapy. Sorry about this very personal rant, but I must really say that THIS is exactly why Offbeat Bride must be one of the best things I have ever found on the Internet. Not only this helps me see the tiny spark of good intention in my moms bloopers, it really, really reminds me that I don't need to be her. Reply I decided to join a gym BEFORE we'd set a wedding date. In fact we'd been engaged for nearly 2 years so wedding plans were still non-existent. I joined the gym in November 2014 and it wasn't until January 2015 we decided to start planning our wedding for October this year. What I find insanely annoying is all the comments I get about how I'm 'losing weight for the wedding' and I have to stop people and explain to them that it has nothing to do with the wedding!! I'm doing this for ME and not for anyone or anything else. Sometimes it's followed up with a 'Yeah.. sure you are' but I have learned to ignore it. FRUSTRATING MUCH!? Reply One more thing I'd like to add on this subject.. My mum has always made remarks towards my sister and I regarding our weight. Then one fine day, I lost my shit. We were having bacon and eggs for breakfast at mum and dads (staying home for the weekend, I was in my mid 20's at the time) when I mentioned my partner and I liked to have bacon and eggs most weekends. My mum gave me a smirk, held my waist and said 'Yes dear, I can tell!' At that very moment, I snapped. 'How dare you!' From there I let it flow.. I can't remember exactly what I said but I finally let out what I'd wanted to say for a long time. I went on about how my size doesn't matter, she's always commented on my weight even when I was at my smallest. I don't give a flying fuck about my size and neither should she. I recall bursting into tears and yelling through those tears – in front of everyone. 'Your my mum and you're meant to love me for who I am not how I look!' (I remember saying that bit..) After my explosion my mum looked like she was about to cry herself. She was terribly sorry, she didn't mean it like that and didn't realise she was hurting me. (apparently she thought if she didn't say anything, no one would and I'd never know.. uh huh) Since then, mum has never ever said a bad word about my weight 🙂 She's never forgotten the incident so thankfully I got through to her. So I guess there's a 3rd option for those who really don't know how to get through to their mothers (or anyone for that matter!) and unfortunately it requires a blow-up moment but hey, it worked for me! Reply It is a challenge to deal with family members and friends opinions of how we should look. A wedding being such a special event just amplifies the pressure to lose weight. I am very fortunate in that my mother is non-judgmental; therefore I never received from my mother any critic or opinion of my body weight. That is really a relief during wedding planning. It is great that you are giving us the readers 2 communication options: quick and long one. The pressure of losing weight can come up at different times therefore it is good to learn to free ourselves from others opinions. A complementary information about this subject can be found: http://raisefrequency.com/12-law-of-attraction-weight-loss-secrets/#_5_Free_yourself_from_the_effects_of_judgments_of_others Reply Read more comments ‹ 1 2 Join the conversation Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Sign me up for your offbeat awesomeness newsletter! No-drama comment policy Part of what makes the Offbeat Empire different is our commitment to civil, constructive commenting. Make sure you're familiar with our no-drama comment policy. Biz owners & wedding bloggers Please just use your real name in your comment, not your business name or blog title. Our comments are not the place to pimp your website. If you want to promote your stuff on Offbeat Bride, join us as an advertiser instead.


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The impact of learning disabilities is lifelong. The issues that made school work so challenging as a child crop up again in the workplace, in social situations, and in our homes. Paperwork and reports at work; keeping up with bills; and helping our children with their homework can be a struggle.
Maybe you grew up knowing you had a learning disability and received special education services. Or you struggled with learning difficulties and never knew exactly how to identify the problem. As an adult, you are probably now in command of a number of techniques that make life easier. Over the years, you have figured out ways to obtain and keep track of the information you need. You have developed systems to get organized. On this page, you can find even more avenues to success at work, in your relationships, and in the community.
New to LD
If you are just learning that you have a learning disability you may be confused and not know where to begin. It can be a daunting and complicated task. But don't despair. LDA is here to help you understand this new diagnosis and lead you or your child to the right support systems.
Specific Learning Disabilities
A specific learning disability that affects a person's ability to understand numbers and learn math facts.
Learn more about Dyscalculia.
A specific learning disability that affects a person's handwriting ability and fine motor skills.
Learn more about Dysgraphia.
A specific learning disability that affects reading and related language-based processing skills.
Learn more about Dyslexia.
Learning disabilities that affect an individual's understanding of what they read or of spoken language. The ability to express one's self with oral language may also be impacted.
Learn more about Oral / Written Language Disorder and Specific Reading Comprehension Deficit
Individuals with these learning disabilities have trouble interpreting nonverbal cues like facial expressions or body language and may have poor coordination.
Learn more about Non-Verbal Learning Disabilities
Related Disorders
A disorder that includes difficulty staying focused and paying attention, controlling behavior and hyperactivity.
Learn more about ADHD.
A disorder which causes problems with movement and coordination, language and speech.
Learn more about Dyspraxia.
Affects, planning, organization, strategizing, attention to details and managing time and space.
Learn more about Executive Function.
Support for Adults with LD
Learning the basics about LD and ADHD is an important start to getting help. After the signs and symptoms of LD are recognized, the appropriate assessment and evaluation will be needed to determine the right strategies to help the individual.
Read articles
Evaluation involves gathering information from a variety of sources about an individual's functioning and development in all areas. It is generally one of the first steps in determining if a child has a learning disability. This section will help adults answer their questions on assessment and evaluation.
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Understanding your options after high school and creating a plan is important to future success. Here we will summarize the options that can be considered after graduation from high school from college, to adult education to life skill programs.
Read articles
Adults use many types of literacy tasks associated with work, home and community contexts. This section will help to guide professionals who teach adults in literacy programs as well as the adults themselves who want to start on a path to improve their literacy skills.
Read articles
The American with Disabilities Act of 1990 (ADA) protects adults with disabilities including learning disabilities (LD) in higher education programs and employment. This section contains an overview of how these laws and others can protect the civil rights of adults with LD.
Read articles
Disclosure in the workplace is a question many adults with LD ask. Self advocacy in the workplace, finding centers that can help find employment or provide training and possible accommodations are among the issues that will be explored in this area.
Read articles
Mental health issues can affect anyone, including individuals with learning disabilities (LD) and/or ADHD. Here you will find tips and guidelines for preventing, identifying, and addressing mental health issues linked to learning disabilities.
Read articles
The growth of technology is widespread in our everyday lives and is used extensively in the classroom. It can be an invaluable tool for individuals with learning disabilities (LD). Here we explore current and new technologies for individuals with LD to consider.
Read articles
Adult Resources
Guides & Booklets
- Ed Pubs
Items include: brochures, CD-ROMs, grant applications, newsletters, posters, research reports, videotapes and financial aid products.

subset: commoncrawl


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The company from Norway that wanted to build a wind farm off the coast of Maine has pulled the plug on the project.
Statoil had first proposed it nearly three years ago.
But, it recently put its plan on hold after the LePage administration pushed to reopen the competitive bidding process so that a company affiliated with UMaine's technology center could be allowed to bid, as well.
Is this the governor protecting Maine interests? Or does this fly in the face of his promise to bring more outside business to the state?
We talk with our political analysts Phil Harriman and Ethan Strimling about that as well as the latest on the efforts to end the partial federal government shutdown.


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Posts Tagged 'quetiapient'
Too much to say…
I have lots on my mind and plenty that I'd like to share, but the time and motivation has been lacking. I wish I could just empty my head onto this blog, without having to go to the effort to sit here and type. When I am lying awake at night, I think about what I'd like to post, but I rarely make those posts a reality. It would be brilliant if I could make posts happen just by thinking of them. It would make me a much better blogger and would save me a lot of time. It would give me something to do when I can't sleep. It would also mean that this post wouldn't have taken over two weeks to materialise.
So the big news is I've started therapy. Or rather I've started the assessment sessions for therapy with the new psychologist.
The first few appointments have been okay I guess. During the first appointment we mainly talked about the practicalities of therapy and she updated me on the changes going on in the service (change in Trusts). She asked me a bit about what has been going on for me lately and how I feel therapy can help. I didn't really know what to say, but found myself talking about the whole diagnonsense malarky. I was scared about getting onto such territory, but I guess the fact I felt able to bring it up must suggest I was relatively comfortable talking to her. I was worried about how she would react but she seemed reasonably sympathetic and supportive of my concerns. I told her I was unhappy about how they were so quick to change my diagnosis to a PD, especially when I was obviously unwell and not exactly demonstrating my usual behaviour. I think she understood, but I don't know if she agreed as such.
I felt completely exhausted after the first appointment. I had to go straight to work and had a few errands to run and wasn't in any frame of mind to do so. I was feeling really dazed and found it was impossible to concentrate. I didn't get anything useful done at work, but at least I didn't have anything important to do. I got lost twice that afternoon too. Despite looking up directions, I would forget where I was going before I got to the first junction and have to pull over and look them up again. In total, I probably spent over an hour driving in circles on that day trying to find the depot to collect a parcel. One of the places I'd been to hundreds of times before too, which is even more frustrating because I never used to get lost. If I'd been somewhere, I could always find my way back. Not any more.
The second appointment was a lot less structured than the first and felt like it went all over the place. We covered ten billion things, yet I don't know how much was relevant. It felt like we were skipping over things too quickly and completely missing out others. I guess it is hard to know where to start when there is so much history to cover and so many different layers. The appointment went in no time and I can barely remember anything which was discussed. At the end she suggested we tried to start from the beginning for the third appointment and she asked me to put together a timeline of key events, separated by good times and bad times. I'd done timelines and histories before, but was a bit worried about putting it together again and leaving things out.
So the third appointment was meant to go over my time line, but we ended up talking a little about the second appointment first. When we did get on to the timeline we didn't get very far. We only managed to cover up until the end of primary school really. She asked a lot of questions, mainly about my family and what life was like as a child. I can barely remember, so this was hard and I didn't know what to say. I have a few clear memories and a lot of fuzziness. The session disappeared in no time. We're meant to be picking up on it again next week. Fingers crossed we will cover a little more. There are only two more assessment sessions left.
Aside from therapy I have got very little else done over the past few weeks.
I saw Dr N a couple weeks ago and we discussed the medication question. He hadn't got the letter from Dr M. He said it usually takes her a while. I explained what her suggestions were and we discussed it. He thinks Quetiapine should be a definite no, which I agree with. He didn't think it helped me the first time around and as I'm already on the Lamotrigine as a mood stabiliser he is not sure it will help. He was really keen for me to come off the Reboxetine though and was keen to find an alternative. He said that I have been "really quite unwell" since I started it. I know I've been struggling a lot with the side effects, but I'd never really considered the physical illness to be all that important even though it is problematic. I have always thought the mental improvement was worth it. When I was so depressed before, it was just a relief to feel different. He is not so sure that Reboxetine is good for me though. He still isn't even convinced the Reboxetine was responsible for my mental improvement. I don't know. He seems to like the idea of trying Mirtazapine. He considers it a more effective anti-depressant and thinks it will help with my sleep. We talked about the weight gain and he said I could always stop it if that became a problem. Overall, he seemed to want me to take it and he offered to write me the script, but I wasn't so sure. I mentioned that the bloke wasn't keen on the idea and he said that didn't surprise him. It's so common for people to want you to take less pills, not more. To be fair, I'd like to take less pills, but I know that is probably not a wise option. I decided I'd like to wait and think about it a while longer though. I also mentioned that I'd got the therapy appointment through and he agreed that therapy may be a reason to hold off making any changes right now. I wouldn't be able to tell if something was making me worse or know what to blame. So that's how I left things. I am going to see how the first few therapy appointments go and then decide. I could try and hang on until Spring and then maybe I can manage with a lower dose of Reboxetine again anyway, but we don't know. It's another case of "we shall see". It's a phrase I seem to use often at the moment.
I had my dental hospital appointment as well a few weeks ago. That was to discuss the TMJ (jaw joint) problems I've been having. I had an x-ray and after a long wait the consultant poked and prodded and moved my mouth about, to come to the conclusion it's a cartilage problem. She didn't really offer any solutions to this problem, other than the usual stuff. I was aware of the normal management techniques already – identify habits such as nail biting, night-time grinding etc, do some simple jaw exercises and take ibuprofen regularly. She agreed that there was no evidence of night-time grinding from my teeth, so she doesn't think a splint or mouth guard will help. She did notice that I had short, bitten nails, but I actually tend to pick at them with my fingers rather than bite them. So she's given me some jaw exercises anyway and I see her again in 3 months.
There was one weird thing about the appointment though. The consultant reminded me an awful lot of Dr Shock, who was in charge of the ECT. Considering I attribute the jaw problems to the ECT, I found this very unsettling. I don't really remember what Dr Shock looked like, but this consultant was an equally large woman and I remember her voice was very similar. Something about her manner reminded me of her too.
Thinking of ECT, I drove past the hospital today. I have been past a couple of times since I had the treatment and every time I go past I feel a bit weird. I think of the taxi trips over to the other hospital and the strange nervousness that went with it.
Last week I had another appointment with Dr Occy Health. It was a strange appointment, made stranger by the fact he misunderstood me near the beginning and it only become clear towards the end of the appointment that he was mistaken. When I said I was still only working 6 hours a week, split over 2 days, he thought I was working 6 hour days, twice a week (12 hours). This is understandable because it is what we were aiming for. He went through most of the appointment under the assumption I was fine, had met the 12 hour target and we should set a new target of 15 hours by the end of Feb. I didn't realise until he went to dictate his letter at the end. We had to back track quickly and he said we should just stick to the 12 hour target for now then. He was keen to stress that managing the 6 hours was an achievement, but I felt like I'd let him down a little. He seemed so pleased at my supposed progress, it was a little disheartening to admit I'd not made the target. Admittedly part of the reason for not making that target has been the reluctance to increase the hours from HR. Rehab Consultant Woman happened to contact me when I was at my worst in December and she had been somewhat concerned that I was struggling. It seems she passed this message on to HR, which is why they wouldn't increase my hours. I hadn't realised this at the time. Despite the fact I have been struggling a little, I'm not sure extra hours will make it worse. If anything it may even help. I often feel that the 3 hours I am working is not long enough and I try to cram too much stuff into that short period of time. A little bit more time may help me slow down. I don't know. Then again, I don't have enough work to fill 3 hours, so how I expect to fill 6 I don't know.
Anyway, I should sign off. My mood is still up and down and all over the place. I'm managing though for now. Not getting much done aside from work, doctors/therapy appointments and walking the dog, but I am treading water I guess. It is a struggle, but I just have to keep reminding myself I'm miles ahead of where I was this time last year.
I hope everyone else is coping okay. Sorry I've been rubbish at commenting and stuff lately. I'm trying to read what I can, but I am also trying to step away at the same time. I find myself losing time and unfortunately reading blogs seems to eat time pretty quickly, so I am holding back until I can find the time.


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Tere O'Connor has been making wonderful, inscrutable dances for 20 years, and every one of them that I can remember stirred my mind around. As I watch his new double bill at New York Live Arts, Secret Mary and Poem, my life passes before me. Delete "my;" I'm experiencing life as dancing—with its beauties, its collisions, its planned meetings, and its daily load of non sequiturs that somehow add … [Read more...]
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Election 2014: 5 vie for Nevada Co. Superior Court Judge Seat 1
TRUCKEE, Calif. — Five candidates are vying for the Nevada County Superior Court judge seat being vacated by retiring Judge Sean P. Dowling in the upcoming June 3 primary election.
Truckee voters will be asked to choose among Angela L. Bradrick, Anna Ferguson, Jeff Ingram, Jeffrey A. Lake and Robert Tice-Raskin.
Below is information on each candidate, presented in random order.
Angela L. Bradrick, lives in Auburn
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Current occupation: Nevada County Superior Court Legal Research Attorney
Education: Bachelor's degree in English from the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, 1995. Graduated from the University of the Pacific, McGeorge School of Law in 1999.
Career: After passing the California State Bar Exam in 1999, she managed her own law office focusing primarily on family and civil law for two years. In 2001, Bradrick was hired by the Placer County Superior Court as a legal research attorney. In 2010, Angela transferred to the Nevada County Superior Court. For 12 years she has served as a Pro Tem Judge, sitting regularly in family law, family support, civil, probate, small claims and traffic courtrooms. In addition, Bradrick has taught for the California Clerk's Association and is an adjunct faculty member for the University of Phoenix.
Family: A mother of four sons, two in Sierra College, one in high school and the other in elementary.
Anna Ferguson, lives in Nevada City
Current occupation: Nevada County Assistant District Attorney
Education: An undergraduate degree in English from UC Santa Barbara. Graduated cum laude from Pepperdine University School of Law in 1993, passing the bar exam later that year.
Career: Ferguson has been a county assistant D.A. for seven years. Prior to that she served as associate attorney for a civil insurance defense firm in Long Beach, Calif.; deputy public defender for Tulare County, special assistant inspector general for the State of California Inspector General's Office Bureau of Independent Review, auditing prison internal affairs cases; and deputy district attorney for Kings County. Over her 20-year career, she has taken more than 100 cases to jury trial, including homicides, domestic violence, kidnappings and officer-involved shootings.
Associations: She serves as the vice president of the Nevada County Law Library Board of Trustees.
Jeff Ingram, lives in Penn Valley
Current occupation: Attorney
Education: Ventura College, law degree
Career: Admitted to the California Bar in 1979 and runs a practice out of Penn Valley. The employment law and civil litigation attorney has nearly 35 years of experience — 26 in Nevada County — who has handled litigation in 25 counties in the state.
Past election: Ingram ran for Nevada County Supervisor in 1998 against incumbent Rene Antonson on a platform of promoting economic development. Izzy Martin entered the race as a write-in candidate, eventually winning a run-off against Ingram by less than 200 votes. Martin subsequently appointed Ingram, a licensed pilot, to the Nevada County Airport Commission, which he served on for four years.
Associations: For four years, he also served on the board of directors for the Penn Valley Fire Protection District.
Jeffrey A. Lake, lives in Nevada City
Current occupation: Attorney
Education: Bachelor's degree from the University of San Diego in 1988 and earned his law degree from California Western School of Law in 1991.
Career: In 2001, Lake founded the law firm Jeffrey A. Lake, A.P.C. Lake, whose primary law practice is in San Diego, represented Americans for Safe Access Nevada County locally in its efforts to block the county's controversial medical marijuana cultivation ordinance, which was enacted in 2012. The case was dismissed in June 2013 after the California Supreme Court decided in the City of Riverside v. The Inland Empire Patients Health & Wellness Collective that local jurisdictions have the right to regulate both cultivation and distribution via local land-use designations such as zoning ordinances. Over Lake's nearly 23-year career, he has represented hundreds of corporate and individual clients in disputes arising from products liability and other tort based actions, construction defects, real property transactions, contract disputes and business related transactions.
Associations: He has served as area director of the Tierrasanta Community Council and Planning Committee; a member of the City of Poway Budget, Housing and Redevelopment Committees; and director of the Helping Hands Disaster Relief Foundation; and the Kyle Menkee Foundation.
Robert Tice-Raskin, lives in Grass Valley
Current occupation: Federal prosecutor
Education: Bachelor's from Dartmouth College, 1985, and a law degree from Harvard, 1989.
Career: Tice-Raskin has served as a federal prosecutor since 1995 at both the trial and appellate court levels. He has also served as a Judge Pro Tem for the Nevada County Superior Court (as well as Placer and Sacramento counties courts) since 2007, presiding over hundreds of small claims court proceedings, including contract and tort actions. In addition, he is chief of the White Collar Crime Unit for the United States Attorney's Office, Eastern District of California. From 1990 to 1994, he was a litigator at Irell & Manella, a southern California corporate law firm. Prior to that he served as an appointed law clerk or legal advisor to Federal Judge J. Lawrence Irving, United States District Court Judge for the Southern District of California from 1989 to 1990.
Associations: In June 2012 he was appointed to the board of the Pleasant Ridge Union School District to replace outgoing president Roger White. He did not win his seat in the November election, however.
Family: Married to Sandi Tice-Raskin, pediatrician, with five children, ages 14-6.
Sierra Sun Reporter Margaret Moran compiled the above information from various sources, including candidate statements, the Nevada County Superior Court website and regional news reports. Learn more at mynevadacounty.com/nc/elections, or by visiting nevadacountycourts.com.
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Now that Fridays are for Five-Name Friday posts, let's bump the Name Quote posts over to Mondays, shall we?
Here's the latest batch…
From the novel The Notorious Miss Lisle (1911) by Mrs. Baillie Reynolds:
"The notorious Miss Lisle had the most weird Christian name you ever heard of — let's see now, what was it? Not Guinevere, nor Gwendolen — Oh, yes, I have it. Gaenor! G, a, e, n, o, r! Did you ever hear such a name as that?"
From "Do Weird Baby Names Indicate Selfishness Or Love? Yes" by Joy Pullmann of The Federalist:
Our first child has a rather weird name. Ransom is a genuine, old name, but the effects of choosing it actually made me determined not to make such an ethereal pick again. I've finally joined my husband on the plain-vanilla baby names bandwagon, just as everyone.s getting off it.
Our son's name means a great deal to us because it in fact does signal our family's ties to something greater than even each other. It's an enduring mark of gratitude for a faith that kept me from killing a child I didn't want. That faith and that child ransomed me from selfishness (or at least some selfishness). So it may be and is indeed likely that other people's children, whatever their names, can and have performed similar acts of mercy even just by existing. And how would an onlooker know whether an unusual name signifies parental self-absorption or self-sacrifice?
They wouldn't. But, all the same, our next baby will have a meaningful name that other people have heard before.
From "Why Google's smart assistant doesn't have a name like Siri, Alexa, or Cortana" by Jillian D'Onfro of Business Insider:
Assistant's lack of personality was quite intentional, according to Jonathan Jarvis, a former creative director on Google's Labs team.
"We always wanted to make it feel like you were the agent, and it was more like a superpower that you had and a tool that you used," he tells Business Insider. "If you create this personified assistant, that feels like a different relationship."
For that reason, Assistant likely won't be telling you jokes or serving up sassy responses, either.
We also heard while at I/O that Google didn't want to give its assistant a gender or make it seem too American.
From "The Difficulty of Names" by Mami Suzuki of the blog Tofugu:
My name "Mami" (pronounced mommy) is a good example of this. Mami is quite a common name in Japan and mostly means "true beauty" or "true", but in English, it just sounds like mother. Therefore, I always feel embarrassed when I introduce myself, because I have to say, "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Mami." It's pretty strange, isn't it? "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Mother. Say my name." Even my teachers and my bosses have to call me Mommy!
From "Bye-bye Berlin: Wheels for name change set in motion 100 years ago" about the Ontario town of Kitchener (formerly Berlin):
Meanwhile, 100 years after it was nixed, the Berlin name is enjoying a bit of a minor renaissance in Kitchener.
Two businesses prominently featuring the name have opened in recent months: The Berlin restaurant and the Berlin Bicycle Café.
Andrea Hennige, the restaurant manager at The Berlin, says the name was chosen with an eye toward the area's history.
"It's a nod to the people who settled the area, who probably laid the bricks in this building," she said in an interview.
Town residents voted to drop the name Berlin in 1916, during WWI. The name change ballot included the following options: Adanac (Canada spelled backwards), Benton, Brock, Corona, Keowana, and Kitchener. Speaking of ballots…
From "Maine"s GOP governor, veto record-holder, names new dog Veto" in The Seattle Times:
Republican Gov. Paul LePage, the state's all-time veto champion, has named his new dog Veto.
LePage, who has earned renown for exercising his veto pen on bills he didn't like, adopted a Jack Russell terrier mix from a shelter.
LePage chose the name Veto because his pet "is the mascot of good public policy, defender of the Maine people and protector of hardworking taxpayers from bad legislation," his spokesman Peter Steele said.
Steele joked that the governor is going to train the dog to deliver vetoes from his office to legislative leaders.
From "Why There Are So Many More Names for Baby Girls" by Chris Wilson in TIME:
"The culture is much more accepting of out-there girls' names," says Matthew Hahn, a professor of biology and informatics at the University of Indiana who co-authored a 2003 study comparing baby name trends to evolutionary models. "The same goes for inventing new names." For example, some formerly male-dominated names become predominantly female names, like Lindsey and Mckenzie, but it rarely goes the other way.
"The inventiveness in girl names has always led the boys," says Alex Bentley, a professor in comparative cultural studies at the University of Houston and a co-author of the 2003 study, though he notes that, in the past decade, the rate at which people invent new boy names has caught up with the rate for girls.
From "Ever Wonder How Ice Cube Got His Name? Here's Your Answer" by Angela Watercutter in Wired:
"My brother, he's about nine years older than me, he used to have all kind of women calling the house and I would try to get at them," the man known to the IRS as O'Shea Jackson says in this Google Autocomplete interview. "He got mad at that and said he was going to slam me in the freezer one day, and turn me into an ice cube. I said, 'You know what? That's a badge of honor.'"


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British judge rules against mother in child cancer case
A judge ruled Tuesday that a seven-year-old British boy with cancer could undergo more surgery despite his mother's opposition, which had led her to run away with her son earlier this month.
High Court judge David Bodey ruled that Neon Roberts, who has already had surgery on a brain tumour, should have another operation after hearing from doctors that he would very likely die soon without treatment.
The boy's mother Sally Roberts, 37, had refused to give her consent, telling the court: "I feel I need more expert opinion on it before proceeding."
But a doctor treating Neon said a scan showed more surgery needed to be carried out "urgently", saying there was a residual tumour left behind from the first operation. He said a second doctor agreed with his analysis.
The judge had been due to decide whether Neon should undergo radiotherapy treatment following surgery, which his mother had also opposed, but that issue was put on hold pending a ruling on the operation.
Sally Roberts has been locked in a legal dispute with her estranged husband Ben over the boy's condition and treatment, and earlier this month she went on the run with Neon in what she later said was a panicked move to protect him.
The New Zealander says she fears radiotherapy would cause her son long-term harm.
The pair were found safe after a judge ordered a search and Roberts apologised for her actions.
Explore further
(c) 2012 AFP


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Inspired by Skagit Valley Co-op's great success in making homemade sausage, our Meat departments have perfected their own sausage blends. We're using whole pork shoulder from Salmon Creek Farms and a blend of herbs and spices (never any preservatives) to create our mild Italian, Breakfast, and Chorizo sausages – available as links or in bulk packages. All three varieties are available at both of our locations, plus you can also purchase hot Italian sausage at our Downtown store.
For my recipe demo yesterday, I decided to feature the mild Italian sausage. After searching the web for a fun way to serve it, I ran across a recipe for antipasto (Italian for "before the meal") skewers and thought I'd put my own spin on it. Not only are these easy to make, but they look great on a plate and make a fantastic appetizer since you can serve them hot or cold.
I started with a specially made 18″ link of sausage (talk to our Meat department if you'd like make a request like this) and paired it with bocconcini mozzarella (those little balls of fresh mozzarella), Mediterranean Organics sun-dried tomatoes in olive oil, and some organic local basil from the Growing Garden. I pre-sliced the sausage (with a really sharp knife) before cooking it in a frying pan over medium heat, and I let the slices drain and cool slightly before assembling my skewers. They came together very quickly, and flew off the plate equally fast! They smell divine and are very eye pleasing – a great combination in any dish!
Antipasto Sausage Skewers
- 1 package Co-op house made Italian Sausage, cut into ~1/2" chunks
- sun-dried tomatoes in olive oil, cut into quarters—you won't need the whole jar, just a piece for each skewer
- 1 bunch fresh basil, washed and dried
- Fresh mozzarella—either bocconcini or a log that has been cut into small chunks
- Toothpicks or short skewers
- In a skillet, cook sausage chunks until browned and fully cooked, about 8 minutes total. Use a very sharp knife to make the cutting easier. You can also cook the whole sausage and slice it afterwards.
- Drain sausage on a paper towel-lined plate and allow to cool slightly.
- Slide a basil leaf onto your skewer/toothpick.
- Slide a sun-dried tomato onto the skewer/toothpick until it almost touches the basil.
- Add the mozzarella to the skewer/toothpick.
- Finish by setting a flat side of sausage on the plate and skewering it so everything sits up vertically.
- Repeat with remaining ingredients.
- Serve immediately, or chill and serve at room temperature.
Try substituting one or more of these items:
- Roasted red peppers
- Artichoke hearts
- Smoked goat cheese
- Spicy sausage
- Fresh Roma tomatoes


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Stuart Lamble Loopie Floor Lamp: Grey Wash: Walnut
Stuart Lamble Loopie Floor Lamp
This Loopie Floor Lamp is a stunning piece of design from Stuart Lamble, the Cornish born craftsman who specialises in producing hand-made lighting from his Devon workshop from ethical, sustainable sources.
The Loopie Floor Lamp measures at 140cm in height, 55cm in width and 55cm in depth. You get a choice of wood when it comes to the construction of the tripod base and back piece of either Oak, Ash or Walnut, so you can cater your decision to the décor of the room in which it will be positioned.
As Stuart Lamble is always keen on sourcing local and sustainable materials for his designs, the shade is made from sustainably sourced birch ply. The beauty of the design, then, is not only in its stunningly pleasing aesthetic qualities, but also in the knowledge that it has been produced with passion and in an ecologically progressive manner.
These lamps come complete with an LED E27 bulb and, as they are carefully and personally hand-made to order, this means that delivery is normally 7 -10 days from order.
Delivery is charged as priced on each order. Your order will usually be sent on next day delivery. Once you have placed an order it will be dispatched the same day or the next day depending on the time the order was placed. If you wish to cancel your order after it has been dispatched, you will be charged for both delivery and collection cost.
UK standard delivery: £3.95
When you select UK STANDARD DELIVERY your order will be carefully wrapped and quickly despatched. Orders will be sent by Royal Mail, or by courier if your order is heavy or bulky.
UK expedited delivery: £9.95
When you select UK EXPEDITED DELIVERY your order will be despatched on the same day if we receive your order before midday. Your order will be sent by a courier with an insured and trackable service. You should receive your order by 6pm the next working day. A signature is required on receipt of your parcel.
Orders placed after midday on Friday or over the weekend will be despatched on Monday for delivery the next working day.
International expedited delivery
We do not offer international delivery as standard but please call 01872 273631 to discuss.
If you are unavailable when our delivery partner tries to deliver your order, they will usually try to deliver again the next working day or they will drop a card in to offer you a collection from a local collection point. If you should refuse delivery of goods, or are not available to accept the delivery on both delivery attempts, you will be required to cover any extra costs incurred.
All quoted delivery prices are for most UK Mainland addresses. Northern Ireland (BT), Isle of Wight (PO30-37), Isle of Man (IM), Scottish Highlands and Orkney Isles (PA, ML, EH, KA, G, KY, PH, DD, AB, IV, KW), Outer Hebrides and the Shetland Isles (HS, ZE) will incur additional charges and may also experience delivery delays; morning, Saturday and "next working day" deliveries are optional and will also incur additional charges.
We will only deliver goods to the address on the order.
Under the Distance Selling Regulations, you may cancel your purchase a product or products from us at any time within 7 working days after the day you received the relevant products or products
You are responsible for the cost of returning your item(s) to us, unless you received a faulty, damaged or wrongly despatched item. Returns can take up to 21 days to be processed, especially during busy periods.
Please repack your item with care using all the original packaging or a suitable alternative. As the goods are your responsibility until they reach our warehouse. Please ensure you package your return to prevent any damage to the items or boxes.
If an item is not packaged correctly and has been damaged in transit back to us, we will contact you and may need to either return the product to you, or only issue a partial refund via credit note.
This cancellation policy does not affect your rights when we are at fault — for example, if goods are faulty or wrongly described.
To return your purchase please e-mail details of your Order Number and reason for return to firstname.lastname@example.com
Return packages should be addressed to:Illustrated Living Ltd
Lemon St Market
Lemon Street
We will refund your money, including the original postage charges, within 30 days. If you cancel, you must return the goods to us at your own expense. You are responsible for the risk of loss or damage when you return goods, so you should take out enough postal insurance to cover their value. If you fail to take reasonable care of the goods before they are returned to us, and this results in damage or deterioration, we will charge you for the reduction in value.


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fixed your image
sorry, didn't see someone already did that.
That desert, especially the chocolate one, was superb as well
Originally Posted by BaldLoonie
That desert, especially the chocolate one, was superb as well
You ain't kidding! Man it was good!
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Had a great time! I will be there every year!
I was a good boy. I had chile and tequila for dinner two nights. I heard there were sonic booms both mornings after and my bed covers had floated across the room. I wonder if the two incidences are connected.
Training is important!
Practical Training is a must!
Originally Posted by icemeister
I brightened it up a bit...
So sorry I couldn't make it.
There was just enough desert to go around with the six of us.. LOL
Yeah.. dinner was beyond good. That's why there is nothing left but the libation.
Right to left... Dad, HeyBob, K_Fridge, Loonie, Chris Worthington and Beenthere
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Man oh man, what a motley crew.
Politicians need to be changed like diapers, and for the same reason.
Mark Twain
Sure looks like a bunch of old foogies to me. Who was the designated driver?
I'm not tolerating Political Correctness anymore, from now on it's tell it like it is.
Veto Pro Pak - The best tool bag you'll ever own
Originally Posted by Texas-Tech
Sure looks like a bunch of old foogies to me. Who was the designated driver?
No driving for us, we walked and walked and walked some more during those 3 days
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Originally Posted by Chris_Worthington
No driving for us, we walked and walked and walked some more during those 3 days
We needed to walk after all that we ate! 'Specially that cookie/ice cream thing.
Where's my free t-shirt for registering?
Steamfitters Local 601
Originally Posted by Korndogg
Where's my free t-shirt for registering?
Union thugs have to pay dues in order to get free things
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Helen Green
Helen began dancing at the Bush Davies School, Romford. She continued her training with the Faulkner Hembry School of Dance prior to commencing a three year course at Bird College where she obtained her vocational examinations. Upon leaving she commenced her dancing career, working and touring for several years in Europe.
Helen achieved further teaching qualifications on her return to England and since then has taught at Bird College, Laura Faulkner School of Dance and has also freelanced choreographing various items for school productions.
Her love of travel has resulted in her teaching at many schools abroad in Spain, Italy, Sweden and Australia. In 1998 she was appointed as an examiner for the Modern and Tap Faculty and now examines for both Modern Dance and Tap Dance Faculties.
She became a member of the Tap Committee in 2003 and has since enjoyed teaching at the Summer School at Chichester and lecturing at regional and London courses throughout the year.
From 2005 Helen has been examining and lecturing internationally which she greatly enjoys and has recently taught at the ISTD Italian Summer School in Bari.


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Blog Archives
Rumor States Two New iPads With Be Released In January
A recent DigiTimes article reported that Apple will be unveiling two new versions of the iPad at iWorld/Macworld on Jan. 26, 2012. These new models will both include a 9.7 inch screen (Just like the current iPad), but at least one will have a QxGA screen, which is 1536×2048 pixel resolution.
Also, one of the new models is said to have a 8 megapixel rear facing camera and the other will have a 5 megapixel camera. The new battery being used in these tablets is supposedly a 14,000mAh battery which is the largest battery that we have seen on a tablet before.
Not too much is known and once again, these are just rumors…for now. Other rumors state that the release date might not be until Feb. 24, 2012 which is the birthday of Steve Jobs.
All we can do right now is wait and see.


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The crossover vehicle has presented many automakers an opportunity to explore different dimension of design. While some crossover designs seek optimal practicality, others re-imagine luxury in the larger interior confides. In the most radical form, the styling theme of crossover vehicles has consisted of threading sportiness into designs. The BMW X6, Acura ZDX and the Porsche Cayenne are a few production crossovers that have attempted to find a perfect marriage of performance car appearance with the proportions of a taller, utilitarian shape. At the 2014 Beijing Motor Show, Audi has lent the TT sports car nameplate to the German luxury brand's conceptual study for their sport-oriented crossover.
A four-door crossover coated with Sonora Yellow paint, the Audi TT Offroad Concept spans 4.39 meters in length and 1.53 meters tall. The height of the concept vehicle is lower than that of the Audi Q5 and just 6 centimeters taller than the A4 Allroad. Utilizing the Audi Space Frame consisting of aluminum and steel construction, the Audi TT Offroad Concept is provided with an almost sedan-like appearance. Aspects seen on the 2015 Audi TT also radiate over the entire composition of the show car. The arching of the roof for the crossover concept vehicle is very much attributed to the new TT coupe.
The Audi TT Offroad Concept functions as a plug-in hybrid embodying e-tron technology configured around gasoline engine and two electric motors. Gasoline power is sourced from a 2.0 TFSI four-cylinder powerplant generating 288 horsepower and 280.3 pound-feet of torque. However, for up to the first 50 kilometers (31.1 miles of the Audi TT Offroad Concept's trip, the vehicle runs off a 12 kWh capacity battery powering a 40-kilowatt and an 85-kilowatt electric motor. The lower-powered motor is integrated with the TFSI engine while the 85-kilowatt unit is designed to be independent. EV mode, Hybrid and Sport mode are featured with the TT Offroad Concept's powertrain. Working together, the drivetrain receives up to 402 horsepower of propulsion. An Audi e-S tronic six-speed dual-clutch transmission channels power through an intelligent all-wheel drive system. The hybrid technology onboard the Audi TT Offroad Concept manages wheel spin based on the vehicle's driving mode.
One method exhibited for charging lithium-ion battery pack of the TT Offroad Concept is Audi Wireless Charging technology. Using inductive charging system said to be 90 percent efficient, the vehicle charges overtop of a plate while parked. Through Audi Wireless Charging, no contact is made between the charger and the Audi TT Offroad Concept during the replenishing of the battery.
Designed for four adult passengers, the Audi TT Offroad Concept's interior is inspired by mood created inside the A7 Sportback and the recently introduced new TT coupe. Front and rear seats are contoured for a gripping hold for when the TT Offroad Concept is being put through its paces. Air vents are shaped to resemble jet engines and sport integrated climate controls. Similar to the experience inside the 2015 Audi TT, a 12.3-inch Virtual Cockpit is placed within the instrument panel providing the driver of a biased level of control. Basic readouts for speed as well as more sophisticated information like navigation, traffic and information on the Audi Wireless Charging technology is relayed to the driver through the Virtual Cockpit.
On the Audi TT Offroad Concept, passengers are treated to a series of interactive media solutions through Audi Smart Displays. Special tablets computers found inside the TT Offroad Concept but capable of operating outside the vehicle, the Audi Smart Displays allow DVD, television streaming as well as radio control. The Audi Smart Displays can also interact with the navigation system mapping and is Internet-ready with an LTE high-speed connection using a Google Chrome browser.
The Chinese auto market is among the most important sales environments for the 21st century. For Audi parent company Volkswagen Group, China has played an integral part in allowing the German car company to flourish into a major global player. In fact, Volkswagen's was one of the first major automakers outside of the Chinese market to have a meaningful presence in the mainland. The luxury and premium car segment has been growing to an extent that every prestigious brand must be present. After the month of March, Audi has sold over 124,500 vehicles in China for 2014. For the Audi brand, sales total in China is greater than first-three months of sales in the regions of Germany, United States, Italy and Spain combined.
Information and photo source: Audi AG


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Evelyn Mishler Metzger, 92, daughter of Harley and Ada Poland Mishler, died on Nov. 21. She was born on Jan. 20, 1921 in Whitley County.
Evelyn graduated from South Whitley High School in 1939. Because she was actively involved in 4-H for ten years, Evelyn was immediately hired as Whitley County 4-H leader. In 1942, she married Leo Metzger in the Spring Creek Church of the Brethren. After first living with Leo's parents, Evelyn moved with her husband to upstate New York for Leo's World War Two draft assignment. Evelyn was employed as a grocery price administrator. In New York, she gave birth to their first children in 1946, twins, Devon and Yvonne followed in later years by Nolan, Ondalee and Marlon. After living in South Whitley for twenty years, farming with her husband and raising five children, Evelyn moved to Auburn, where she and her husband bought a dairy farm. It was here, in the Auburn area where Evelyn entered a second phase of her life, opening a popular consignment retail shop entitled Country Creations, and serving as a director and teacher of a pre-school for 17 years. Evelyn and Leo moved to the Timbercrest Retirement Center in 2000.
Evelyn is survived by her husband, Leo, and their five children, Yvonne Rautenkranz, Devon, Nolan, Ondalee Aschelman and Marlon, 11 grandchildren and 19 great-grandchildren.
A memorial service honoring and remembering Evelyn's life will be held at 2 p.m. Dec. 8, at Timbercrest Chapel, 2201 East Street, North Manchester.
Arrangements are entrusted to McKee Mortuary, North Manchester.