in this last "century of dishonor" Uncle Sam has disbursed millions upon mil lions in the desperately hopeless task of filling the aboriginal stomach, and in striving by means of honest census to re duce the number of the "countless" so pathetically referred to. Indians would make splendid ward politicians, and how it is that the sachems of Tammany have not long since possessed themselves of so available a means of swelling their ranks passeth all understanding. After the Indian had had himself, several wives and his blooming olive branches, "oksheelah, wicincha," boys and girls, and such pappooses as his better halves had at the back (either of home produc tion or borrowed for the moment from the tepee of Two-Bricks-in-his-Hat), duly enumerated, would he not swell the cen sus of his tribe by judicious distribution of all his wives' relations among thos. tepees not already checked off? Oh, if the truth could ever reach the ears of the general public what tales of Indian sagacity might not yet bo in store for them! What annals might not be un folded! Dealing with his own, his white children, who are nonvoters, Uncle Sam serves out one ration a day to each en listed soldier.
