He  emits  this  only  to  propitiate  the  female  sex.
Uhu.  The  reformers  go  to  a  great  University,  point  out
her  rags,  and  say.  Why  don't  you  mend?

Aziola.  The  University  replies  :  This  is  an  old  dress
which  has  descended  to  me ;  it  was  very  handsome  when
new,  and  it  would  be  cruel  to  my  grandmother  to  mend  it,
or  to  wear  another.
Uhu.  Those  fellows  go  to  the  colleges  and  say,  Why  don't
you  revise  your  statutes  ?

Aziola.  The  colleges  fold  their  hands,  turn  up  their  eyes,
and  reply,  We  owe  a  pious  duty  to  our  founders.  Why  do
you  take  so  much  pains  with  a  mere  parsley-bed  ?  they  ask
some  college;  and  it  answers  meekly.  Gentlemen,  my  founder
left  it  me  in  charge.  Why,  then,  did  you  not  take  care  also
of  your  founder's  cow  ?     Who  has  cut  down  his  orchard  ?


152  A  Defence  of  Ignorance.
Gentlemen,   the  cow  was   obviously  sick;  the   apple-trees
were  old.     Then,  why  not  root  up  also  this  rank  parsley  ?

What  do  I  mean  by  the  cow  ?  You  shall  see  presently.
Uhu  pulls  out  his  notes,  and  means  to  be  historical.
Uhu.  Why  flinch  ?  I  will  be  brief  as  Tacitus,  yet  gossip
like  Herodotus — like  Thucydides,  I  will

Civetta.  Yes,  yes,  like  a  good  fellow— go  on.
