THE GOLDEN BAY ARGUS



A" HANDEL ” Recital—playing the barrel-organ. Talk is not cheap when you use a long distance telephone. You never know how dear things are until you buy them, nor how cheap they are until you sell them. He: “Why do you suppose they always represent Cupid as a boy ? She : “Because he never arrives at years of discretion.” “ I saw poor Scribbles the poet this morning, and the poor duller hadn’t an overcoat. Ho’ll die of pneumonia. 1 Not if he is a true poet. They never die.” the young physician's friend. “No,” was the reply, “ what I want is patients. Washington Star. m y-.“ There’s a girl at our school, mamma, they call Postscript. Do you know wby?” Mamma: “No, dear.” Tommy: “ Because her name is Adeline Moore.”— Brooklyn Life. How He Lost His Supper.—Tommy : “Paw, did you go to Sunday-school every day when you was a boy? ” Mr. Figg : “Of course I did. Why?” Tommy: “I thought you maybe went only on Sun days."—lndianapolis Journal. She: “ How was your speech at the club received the other night ? ” He: “ Wh'en I sat down _ they s iidit was the best thing I ever did.”— Life. George: “ But you would lea®n to love me, Elsie.” Elsie: “I do not think I could, George.” George: “Ah! just as I expected; much too old to learn.” A: “When a man triis to borrow money from a friend, that is experimental philosophy.” B: “ Yes ; and when the friend refuses, that is natural philosophy.” Minnie: “Captain Foster has never ppid me any attention before, but ,ha danced with me four iime3 last night.” Maud: “Oh, well, it was a charity ball, sou remember.”.
