The  incongruity  of  the  Kaiser  is  the  in-
congruity of  modern  Germany,  which  is  as
modern  as  you  please,  eager  for  every  new
theory  and  invention,  but  all  the  while
dreaming  of  its  Teutonic  ancestors  in  their
primeval  German  forests,  and  believing  that
the  victory  of  Arminius  over  the  Romans  has
given  it  some  kind  of  hereditary  and  divine
right  to  conquer  all  the  Latin  peoples.  And
so  their  Kaiser,  no  less  eagerly  modern,
believes  in  his  own  divine  right  as  chieftain


34      MORE  THOUGHTS   ON   THE   WAR

of  those  Teutonic  hordes.  He,  with  his
Staff,  throws  back  to  Charlemagne  and  his
paladins  rather  than  to  Arminius,  because
Charlemagne  was  a  Christian  and  a  Holy
Roman  Emperor,  and  the  Kaiser,  if  not
Roman,  is  certainly  holy.  On  that  point  he
has  no  doubt  ;  but,  to  do  him  justice,  he
regards  himself  as  officially  rather  than  as
personally  holy.  Indeed,  he  is  a  comic
figure  because,  to  himself,  he  is  officially
everything  and  personally  nothing  ;  officially
religious,  romantic,  modern,  terrible — in  fact,
all  the  different  things  which  Germany
believes  itself  to  be.
He  painted  a  picture  and  was  then  officially
an  artist,  as  became  the  Emperor  of  a
defiantly  artistic  people.  He  composed  a
march  and  was  officially  a  musician,  as
became  the  head  of  the  most  musical  nation.
