The idea that death is a subject that yon can always hurl at femininity because it likes it better than any other ia a fallacy. No fewer than four lady members of a Dunedin church went off in a dead faint on a recent Sunday night, during the course of a sermon on this awfnl subject. The minister, who was a stranger to the town, and who probably thought he waa on safe ground, waded in amidst a silence that is said by the papers to have been ' positively painful ' A sensitive yonng thing in the choir was the first to go off, quickly followed by three others of uncertain age, and the prospect of an all-round swoon was showing itself when the preacher let go his hold of death and turned his attention to the pearly gates of the New Jerusalem, and thna relieved the tension. This is the season of sales, and bargain storieß are the rage. Not a bad one is told of a Parnell man with a jerky style of speech — everyone knows him. He was speaking to his friend Jones. ' Went home, 1 said he, ' Thursday night and found my wife ill. Symptoms alarm ing. Dosed her best I could. Friday morning she was no better. Felt worried. Wife dull and stupid. No life in her. Started for doctor. Struck by happy thought. Turned back. Care complete.' 'Wbafcwas it?' ' Simple as pie. ' Jußt Baid, "Too bad yon have to be sick on bargain day, my dear." She bounced np " What I" she cried ; " how stupid of one to forget." In five minutes she waa up and dressed and frizzing her hair.' ' Wouldn't it have been cheaper to have fetched the doctor V : ' By Jove, I gness it would I 1

The war is giving names to many babies. Wales already possesses a Modder River Jones, a Kimberley Clifford, Tagela James, Jenny Ladyßmith Jonoß. The widow of a Reservist has given her daughter the names of Modderina, Bel montina Methnena Jones. A young lady sang in a choir — Her voice roße hoir and hoir, Till one starry night It rose oat of sight And was found next morn on the spoir. At a Ponsonby public school. 