Life Skills need for integrated happy life,for trend generation
Nalla vivekanand M.sc.MBA, M.Phil,LLB
“The most useful piece of learning for the uses of life is to unlearn what is not true.” -Antisthenes 444 - 365 BC
“The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes” -William James (Psychologist)
(You can change the way you think and feel by changing what you say when you talk to the mind.)
Psychosocial competence is a person's ability to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of everyday life. It is a person's ability to maintain a state of mental well-being and to demonstrate this in adaptive and positive behaviour while interacting with others, his/her culture and environment. Psychosocial competence has an important role to play in the promotion of health in its broadest sense; in terms of physical, mental and social well-being. In particular, where health problems are related to behaviour, and where the behaviour is related to an inability to deal effectively with stresses and pressures in life, the enhancement of psychosocial competence could make an important contribution. This is especially important for health promotion at a time when behaviour is more and more implicated as the source of health problems. The most direct interventions for the promotion of psychosocial competence are those which enhance the person's coping resources, and personal and social competencies. In school-based programmes for children and adolescents, this can be done by the teaching of life skills in a supportive learning environment.
The Skills -This involves a group of psychosocial and interpersonal skills which are interlinked with each other. For example, decision making is likely to involve creative and critical thinking components and values analysis.
Defining Life Skills
Life skills are abilities for adaptive and positive behaviour that enable individuals to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of everyday life. Described in this way, skills that can be said to be life skills are innumerable, and the nature and definition of life skills are likely to differ across cultures and settings. However, analysis of the life skills field suggests that there is a core set of skills that are at the heart of skills-based initiatives for the promotion of the health and well-being of children and adolescents. These are listed below:
What are Life Skills? Life skills are behaviors that enable individuals to adapt and deal effectively with the demands and challenges of life. There are many such skills, but core life skills include the ability to: The Ten core Life Skills as laid down by WHO are:
Coping with stress
Coping with emotion
Inner to outer circle
Life skills education
Health giving pro-social behaviour
A review by UNICEF found that approaches relying on life skills have been effective in educating youth about health-related issues—such as alcohol, tobacco, and other drug use; nutrition; pregnancy prevention; and preventing HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Life skills education programs can also be effective in preventing school dropout and violence among young people. Finally, these programs can lay the foundation for skills demanded in today's job market.
Self-awareness includes recognition of ‘self’, our character, our strengths and weaknesses, desires and dislikes. Developing self-awareness can help us to recognize when we are stressed or feel under pressure. It is often a prerequisite to effective communication and interpersonal relations, as well as for developing empathy with others.
Empathy - To have a successful relationship with our loved ones and society at large, we need to understand and care about other peoples’ needs, desires and feelings. Empathy is the ability to imagine what life is like for another person. Without empathy, our communication with others will amount to one-way traffic. Worst, we will be acting and behaving according to our self-interest and are bound to run into problems. No man is an island, no woman either! We grow up in relationships with many people – parents, brothers and sisters, cousins, uncles and aunts, classmates, friends and neighbors’. When we understand ourselves as well as others, we are better prepared to communicate our needs and desires. We will be more equipped to say what we want people to know, present our thoughts and ideas and tackle delicate issues without offending other people. At the same time, we will be able to elicit support from others, and win their understanding.
Empathy can help us to accept others, who may be very different from ourselves. This can improve social interactions, especially, in situations of ethnic or cultural diversity. Empathy can also help to encourage nurturing behaviour towards people in need of care and assistance, or tolerance, as is the case with AIDS sufferers, or people with mental disorders, who may be stigmatized and ostracized by the very people they depend upon for support.
Critical thinking is an ability to analyze information and experiences in an objective manner. Critical thinking can contribute to health by helping us to recognize and assess the factors that influence attitudes and behaviour, such as values, peer pressure and the media.
Creative thinking is a novel way of seeing or doing things that is characteristic of four components – fluency (generating new ideas), flexibility (shifting perspective easily), originality (conceiving of something new), and elaboration (building on other ideas).
Decision making helps us to deal constructively with decisions about our lives. This can have consequences for health. It can teach people how to actively make decisions about their actions in relation to healthy assessment of different options and, what effects these different decisions are likely to have.
Problem solving helps us to deal constructively with problems in our lives. Significant problems that are left unresolved can cause mental stress and give rise to accompanying physical strain.
Interpersonal relationship skills help us to relate in positive ways with the people we interact with. This may mean being able to make and keep friendly relationships, which can be of great importance to our mental and social well-being. It may mean keeping, good relations with family members, which are an important source of social support. It may also mean being able to end relationships constructively.
Effective communication means that we are able to express ourselves, both verbally and non-verbally, in ways that are appropriate to our cultures and situations. This means being able to express opinions and desires, and also needs and fears. And it may mean being able to ask for advice and help in a time of need. Coping with stress means recognizing the sources of stress in our lives, recognizing how this affects us, and acting in ways that help us control our levels of stress, by changing our environment or lifestyle and learning how to relax. Coping with emotions means involving recognizing emotions within us and others, being aware of how emotions influence behaviour and being able to respond to emotions appropriately. Intense emotions like anger or sadness can have negative effects on our health if we do not respond appropriately.
Coping with stress: 95% of all the diseases are created by stress. Wrong beliefs like “I’m not good enough” or "Something is wrong with me" cause up to 95% of all illness and disease. The membrane of the cell is the brain of the cell, not the nucleus. Our beliefs are stored in the membrane of our cells. Unless we are fully aware of what we are doing and why we are doing it at every moment, we are always acting on our unconscious programming stored as beliefs in our cells. Scientific research has established that stress is the core factor in physical, mental, and emotional disease. Discovering how unconscious physical, mental and emotional habits create stress, aging, addiction and disease, through awareness and simple lifestyle changes reclaiming youthful vitality, joy and well being.
Recognizing Mental Stress and Well being
Mental Stress Mental Well Being
• Saying ‘No', 'I can't' - Saying ‘Yes’, 'I can!'
• Disapproval Self/Others - Approval Self/Others
• Mental Confusion - Mental Clarity
• Thoughts of Fear, Anger, Grief - Courage, Acceptance
• Mental Tension - Relaxed, Creative thinking
• Wanting Control, Approval, Safety - Allowing, Being
• ‘I am Separate’ - ‘I am connected with the world’
Coping with Stress: (stress Brain Chemistry, Mental Health and Neurotransmitters) Mental health relies on neurotransmitters and hormones being produced utilized and metabolized properly. Hormones and neurotransmitters govern our moods, emotions, behavior, and sleep patterns, as well as every aspect of our physical health. Stress resulting from false beliefs causes imbalances of hormones and neurotransmitters. The diminished availability of just one neurotransmitter or a disruption in its path can adversely affect every aspect of life and health.
Suboptimal Neurotransmitter Levels
Depression, low mood, mood swings.
Insomnia, sleep disturbances.
Difficulty concentrating, focusing or remembering.
Every thought has a biological impact on the body and emotions and influence our heart rhythms.
Thoughts of frustration causes a chaotic heart rhythm pattern creating stress and raising levels of the aging hormone, cortisol.
Thoughts of appreciation cause a coherent heart rhythm, and raise the youthful, happy hormones of dopamine and oxytocin.
Balancing Brain Chemistry Our thoughts and attitudes alter our brain chemistry. When the body and mind can make its own “feel-good” neurotransmitters again, the craving for sugar and alcohol disappears. True peace, joy, optimism and centeredness replace mental and physical fatigue, anxiety, depression and nervousness.
Serotonin, Dopamine and Endorphins Created Naturally –Lowering Stress
MEDITATION, HEARTMATH produces optimum levels.
POSITIVE THINKINING – raises levels.
DEEP BREATHING is one of the most important ways.
SUNLIGHT bright light increases.
EXERCISE one of the best natural ways.
ELIMINATING SUGAR – Sugar creates imbalance.
SPENDING QUALITY TIME with loved ones.
SEX is a powerful producer.
LAUGHTER and smiling have a positive effect on.
OMEGA 3 and VITIMIN C increase levels.
EAT SPICY FOODS like chilies', peppers and jalapenos.
EAT fruits, vegetables, lean protein, nuts and seeds.
Coping with Emotional: Emotional Factors in Mental well being our feelings are a wonderful barometer of our well being. When we are not caught up in negative thinking, our feelings remain positive, and we feel joyful, loving and peaceful. When we are feeling fearful, angry, or depressed it is a sure sign that our thoughts have become negative and dysfunctional. Developing this awareness and making the decision to eliminate negative thinking can be dramatically life changing. Alter your own brain chemistry with thoughts of appreciation, gratitude, joy and love.
Irritability People are low information processors—max out on info processing when stressed b/c constantly thinking of things, More information makes you angry, see everything as serious
Anxiety Free-floating anxiety: constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop
Mental fatigue Forget things, what you meant to do
Overcompensate or live in denial by taking on extra work
Coping and self-management skills refer to skills to increase the internal locus of control, so that the individual believes that they can make a difference in the world and affect change. Self esteem, self-awareness, self-evaluation skills and the ability to set goals are also part of the more general category of self-management skills. Anger, grief and anxiety must all be dealt with, and the individual learns to cope loss or trauma. Stress and time management are key, as are positive thinking and relaxation techniques.
The Skills -This involves a group of psychosocial and interpersonal skills (described in section 3) which are interlinked with each other. For example, decision making is likely to involve creative and critical thinking components and values analysis. Under five main headings relating to: concerns shared by the organizations represented; the definition of “life skills”; the reasons for teaching life skills; life skills education in schools today; and life skills outside schools. Identified in relation to life skills education included the need to:
Strengthen and improve school health;
Promote the development of long-term and holistic life skills curricula in schools;
Promote democracy, gender equality and peace;
Prevent health and social problems including psychoactive substance use, HIV/AIDS, adolescent pregnancy and violence.
The needs of adolescents;
The importance of supporting life skills initiatives for children who do not attend School
Why teach life skills?
That the life skills are essential for: The promotion of healthy child and adolescent development; primary prevention of some key causes of child and adolescent death, disease and disability; socialization; preparing young people for changing social circumstances
Life skills education contributes to: basic education; gender equality; democracy; good citizenship; child care and protection; quality and efficiency of the education system; the promotion of lifelong learning; quality of life; the promotion of peace.
It was also suggested that the learning of life skills might contribute to the utilization of appropriate health services by young people.
Areas of primary prevention for which life skills are considered essential include:
Problems related to the use of alcohol, tobacco and other psychoactive substances;
The following reasons why life skills are essential for primary prevention were listed during a brainstorming session:
State of the art in life skills education in schools
The Meeting emphasized that life skills education is already happening, and that it is possible for United Nations agencies to speed up its development at country level. Many teachers are already engaging in activities related to the development of life skills, but need support to create effective approaches to life skills education for health promotion and primary prevention.
Life skills are generic skills, relevant to many diverse experiences throughout life. They should be taught as such, to gain maximum impact from life skills lessons. However, for an effective contribution to any particular domain of prevention, life skills should also be applied in the context of typical risk situations.
Facilitating the learning of life skills is a central component of programmes designed to promote healthy behaviour and mental well-being. To be effective, the teaching of life skills is coupled with the teaching of health information and the promotion of positive (health promoting and pro-social) attitudes and values. The development of life skills requires modeling of life skills by school staff and a “safe”, supportive classroom environment that is conducive to the practice and reinforcement of skills. Furthermore, life skills education needs to be developed as part of a whole school initiative designed to support the healthy psychosocial development of children and adolescents, for example, through the promotion of child-friendly practices in schools.
To be effective, life skills lessons should be designed to achieve clearly stated learning objectives for each activity. Life skills learning is facilitated by the use of participatory learning methods and is based on a social learning process which includes: hearing an explanation of the skill in question; observation of the skill (modeling); practice of the skill in selected situations in a supportive learning environment; and feedback about individual performance of skills. Practice of skills is facilitated by role-playing in typical scenarios, with a focus on the application of skills and the effect that they have on the outcome of a hypothetical situation. Skills learning are also facilitated by using skills learning “tools”, e.g. by working through steps in the decision- making process. Life skills education should be designed to enable children and adolescents to practice skills in progressively more demanding situations for example, by starting with skills learning in non-threatening, low-risk everyday situations and progressively moving on to the application of skills in threatening, high-risk situations.
Other important methods used to facilitate life skills learning include group work, discussion, debate, story-telling, peer-supported learning and practical community development projects. Practical advice offered during the Meeting included: be humorous, and make it relevant!
Life skills learning cannot be facilitated on the basis of information or discussion alone. Moreover, it is not only an active learning process, it must also include experiential learning, i.e. practical experience and reinforcement of the skills for each student in a supportive learning environment.
The introduction of life skills education requires teacher training to promote effective implementation of the programme. This can be provided as in-service training, but efforts should also be made to introduce it in teacher training colleges. The successful implementation of a life skills programme depends on:
The development of training materials for teacher trainers;
A teaching manual, to provide lesson plans and a framework for a sequential, developmentally appropriate programme;
Teacher training and continuing support in the use of the programme materials.
The scope of life skills education varies with the capacity of education systems. Although programmes can begin on a small scale and for a targeted age group, as a longer-term goal life skills education should be developed so that it continues throughout the school years – from school entry until school leaving age. Life skills education can be designed to be spread across the curriculum, to be a separate subject, to be integrated into an existing subject, or a mix of all of these.
The development of life skills education is a dynamic and evolving process, which should involve children, parents and the local community in making decisions about the content of the programme. Once a programme has been developed, there needs to be scope for local adaptation over time and in different contexts.
In the short term (after 3-6 months of implementation), the effectiveness of a life skills programme can be measured in terms of the specific learning objectives of the life skills lessons, and factors such as changes in self-esteem, perceptions of self-efficacy, and behavioural intentions. Only in the longer term (after at least a year) is it feasible to evaluate life skills education in terms of the prevention of health-damaging and antisocial behaviour, e.g. smoking and use of other psychoactive substances, or incidence of delinquent behaviour. Additional factors may be measured to assess the impact of a life skills programme, such as the effect of life skills education on school performance and school attendance.
Evaluation of life skills education should include a combination of quantitative and qualitative assessment. Qualitative assessment gives an indication of how well the programme is implemented and received. This is an important aspect of evaluation, which has an effect on the interpretation of quantitative research findings.
Life skills outside school
Current knowledge about life skills education internationally is derived chiefly from the school setting. There is a need for greater understanding of the nature of life skills education for young people who are not attending school, in order to identify the best strategies for supporting effective life skills initiatives to reach out-of-school children and adolescents. There was a consensus among participants that the development of life skills initiatives out of school requires special attention from United Nations agencies.
Different types of life skills intervention to reach out-of-school children and adolescents were identified:
(1) Life skills in action. This involves the modeling of life skills using methods such as video films, puppet shows and cartoons (in magazines, newspapers and on television). Such initiatives can be coupled with support materials to introduce discussion about the scenarios presented. The support materials can be developed for implementation by peer or other educators in settings such as youth clubs. UNICEF’s Sara and Meena projects are of this type.2
(2) Life skills training workshops. Short courses of life skills training can be carried out with children and adolescents who participate in sports and recreational clubs. Life skills training workshops can also be integrated into existing courses offering training in livelihood or vocational skills.
(3) Life skills for vulnerable children and adolescents. There is a need for life skills interventions to reach vulnerable children such as street children, sexually exploited and working children, and orphans. Little is known about life skills interventions with vulnerable young people, although there are many indications that life skills play an important role in determining which children cope in difficult circumstances. One suggestion made during the Meeting was to start from what the children are interested in and experiencing and to use that as a basis for building life skills sessions with them. However, that would mean a less structured approach, implying an additional need for well trained educators.
All these three approaches to life skills learning are most likely to rely on short-term interventions. Given the limitations on access to out-of-school children and adolescents over an extended period, an important consideration in the development of life skills interventions will be to identify what is the minimum intervention required to have a positive impact.
KEY ISSUES & CONCERNS OF ADOLESCENT STUDENTS
Developing an Identity
Self – awareness helps adolescents understand themselves and establish their personal identity. Lack of information and skills prevent them from effectively exploring their potential and establishing a positive image and sound career perspective.
Adolescents have frequent mood changes reflecting feelings of anger, sadness, happiness, fear, shame, guilt, and love. Very often, they are unable to understand the emotional turmoil
They do not have a supportive environment in order to share their concerns with others. Counseling facilities are not available.
1. As a part of growing up, adolescents redefine their relationships with parents, peers and members of the opposite sex. Adults have high expectations from them and do not understand their feelings.
Adolescents need social skills for building positive and healthy relationships with others including peer of opposite sex. They need to understand the importance of mutual respect and socially defined boundaries of every relationship.
Resisting Peer Pressure
Adolescents find it difficult to resist peer pressure. Some of them may yield to these pressures and engage in experimentation.
Aggressive self conduct; irresponsible behaviour and substance abuse involve greater risks with regard to physical and mental health.
The experiment with smoking and milder drugs can lead to switching over to hard drugs and addiction at a later stage.
Acquiring Information, Education and Services on issues of Adolescence
Exposure to media and mixed messages from the fast changing world have left adolescents with many unanswered questions
2The widening gap in communication between adolescents and parents is a matter of great concern.
Teachers still feel inhibited to discuss issues frankly and sensitively.
Adolescents seek information from their peer group who are also ill informed and some may fall prey to quacks.
Fear and hesitation prevents them from seeking knowledge on preventive methods and medical help if suffering from RTIs and STIs.
Communicating and negotiating safer life situations
Sexually active adolescents face greater health risks.
Girls may also face mental and emotional problems related to early sexual initiation.
Resisting the vulnerability to drug abuse, violence and conflict with law or society.
Challenges faced by Young people: Developmental Challenges
As adolescence is the period of onset puberty to adulthood. During this period children go through physical, cognitive and emotional changes. For this reason it is very important for individuals to understand and be prepared for the phases of adolescence. During the adolescence stage the individual’s body begins to grow rapidly, size and the shape of the body changes, causing some teenagers to feel uncomfortable in their body. In addition to physical growth, teenagers also experience hormone changes and sexual maturation. These changes leave them confused, vulnerable and egocentric. Research reveals that these pubertal changes affect adolescent’s self image, mood and interaction with parents and peers (Berk, 2007).
However, if the adolescent is informed in advance about these changes, their psychological reactions are known to differ from those that have no prior knowledge about these pubertal changes. For girls who have not been informed about menarche the reactions could be shocking, frightening and disturbing. Similarly for boys who have not been informed about spermarche the reactions could cause mixed feelings. Moreover, information on these changes could help the young person to develop a more positive body image.
On the other hand, when teens have a poor body image, self esteem is low, relationships gets rocky. Conversations with friends shift to dieting and exercise, focus gears to how they look than on what they want to accomplish in life. In the worst cases, eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia and other unhealthy behaviours develop. The media complicates this condition by placing standards for how girls and boys should look defining what is beautiful in our culture and society. Accepting and being satisfied with the way the body is transforming will have a positive impact on the self image of an individual. According to Ohannessian, McCauley, Lerner, Lerner and von Eye (as cited in Atwater & Duffy, 1999) young people who had high levels of self worth are able to cope well with the challenges they face, than the adolescents who had poor family adjustments.
Adolescence is a time for excitement, growth and change. Sometimes adolescents divert their energy into more experimental activities such as smoking, drugs, fighting and breaking rules. Often parents, teachers and care givers are concerned about these changes and believe that this is due to raging hormones. Buchanan, Eccles, and Becker (as cited in Price, 2007) stated that the advancement in developmental psychology and neuroscience explained this phenomenon as the result of complex interplay of body chemistry, brain development and cognitive growth. Nevertheless, these changes that the adolescents experience take place in the context of multiple systems, such as individual relationship, family, school and community that support and influence the change. Neuroscientists believe that by the time the young child reaches puberty, youth had undergone the crucial transformations in the brain development (Price, 2007). The ability to distinguish theory from evidence and to use logic to examine complex relationships and multivariable situations improves in adolescence and adulthood (Berk, 2007). This capacity to think about possibilities expends the mental horizon of the young person causing them to voice out their opinions in family matters, religion, political and moral system. These differences in opinion lead them to explore their boundaries in the quest of finding their identity and thus, involves in risky behaviours.
According to Bronfenbrenner’s ecological model (as cited in McWhirter, McWhirter, Mcwhirter, & McWhirter, 2007) individual human development takes place within multiple ecological systems. The Microsystem consists of people with whom the individual comes into direct contact, including family, school – classmates, teachers and staff. The family Micro system has a major influence on individual development because within this system the individual learns values and attitudes, which will have a long term impact in the future. Hence, the stability of the family, the parenting style, types of family problems and conflicts in a family will determine the type of stresses, conflicts and psychological effects on the individual particularly on adolescents. These ups and downs in the family cause parent-child conflicts, risky behaviours and mood changes in the adolescent’s life (Lahey, 2007).These situations lead to unnecessary stress, anger issues and low self esteem resulting in, low academic performances, and disruptive behavior in school and at home.
Provide a safe and supportive environment for all youth, including teenage parents and children and youth living with, or affected by, HIV/AIDS. These young people need the care and protection of adults they can trust. This is a role for which teachers and other adults in the community may need training and support.
Work to meet the special needs of children and youth in unstable and crisis situations. Instability and adversity are normal conditions for many young people, and their vulnerability to sexual health risks can increase significantly during crises.
What is the Life Skills Education Approach? The life skills approach is an interactive, educational methodology that not only focuses on transmitting knowledge but also aims at shaping attitudes and developing interpersonal skills. The main goal of the life skills approach is to enhance young people's ability to take responsibility for making healthier choices, resisting negative pressures, and avoiding risk behaviors. Teaching methods are youth-centered, gender-sensitive, interactive, and participatory. The most common teaching methods include working in groups, brainstorming, role-playing, storytelling, debating, and participating in discussions and audio visual activities.
Are Life Skills Education Programs Effective in Improving Young Adults' Sexual and Reproductive Health? Over the years, life skills education programs that include sexual and reproductive health information have proven to be effective in delaying the onset of sexual intercourse and, among sexually experienced youth, in increasing the use of condoms and decreasing the number of sexual partners. Evaluation shows that life skills programs can contribute to the reproductive and sexual health of young people around the world. Some programs that have been proven effective or that have shown promise for improving youth's reproductive and sexual health are highlighted here.
How can Life Skills Help Young People make Better Choices concerning their Health?
Developing life skills helps adolescents translate knowledge, attitudes and values into healthy behaviour, such as acquiring the ability to reduce special health risks and adopt healthy behaviour that improve their lives in general (such as planning ahead, career planning, decision-making, and forming positive relationships). The adolescents of today grow up surrounded by mixed messages about sex, drug use, alcohol and adolescent pregnancy. On one hand, parents and teachers warn of the dangers of early and promiscuous sex, adolescent pregnancy, STDs/HIV/AIDS, drugs and alcohol, and on the other hand, messages and behaviour from entertainers and peer pressure contradict those messages. Often, they even promote the opposite behaviour. It is through life skills that teenagers can fight these challenges and protect themselves from teenage pregnancy, STDs, HIV/AIDS, drug violence, sexual abuse, and many other health-related problems. Hopefully, developing life skills among adolescents will empower girls to avoid pregnancy until they reach physical and emotional maturity, develop in both boys and girls responsible and safe sexual behaviour, sensitivity and equity in gender relations, prepare boys and young men to be responsible fathers and friends, encourage adults, especially parents, to listen and respond to young people, help young people avoid risks and hardships and involve them in decisions that affect their lives.
What does Research say about the Outcomes of Life Skills-Based Education?
Developing of life skills have produced the following effects: lessened violent behaviour; increased pro -social behaviour and decreased negative, self-destructive behaviour; increased the ability to plan ahead and choose effective solutions to problems; improved self-image, self-awareness, social and emotional adjustment; increased acquisition of knowledge; improved classroom behaviour; gains in self control and handling of interpersonal problems and coping with anxiety; and improved constructive conflict resolution with peers, impulse control and popularity. Research studies have also shown that sex education based on life skills was more effective in bringing about changes in adolescent contraceptive use; delay in sexual debut; delay in the onset of alcohol and marijuana use and in developing attitudes and behaviour necessary for preventing the spread of HIV/AIDS.
Life Skills and Positive Prevention methods
Establishing Rules for our Group
Various Forms of Communication
How to Start and Stop Conversations
Aggressive Behaviour and Assertive Behaviour
Types of Group Pressure
How to Say "No"
Coping with Stress
Coping with Anger
Responding to Criticism
Criticising and Praising
Critical Thinking Skills
Decision Making Skills
Stages of Problem Solving
Coping with Conflict
Teenager: A Child or an Adult?
How to Start Friendships
How to End Harmful Friendships
Relationships with Members of the Opposite Sex
Relating with Adults
What are Drugs?
Good and Bad Uses of Drugs
Drug Misuse and Abuse
Drugs and Other Toxic Substances
Behaviours of Drug Users
It's Okay to be Drug Free
How to be a Responsible Person and Say "No" to Drugs
Soft skills Need to develop soft skills for enhancing the life.
Personality & attitude Development,
Improving success ratio & Performance
Analytical and logical thinking
SWOT Analysis (based on psychology test)
Management a different perspective
Time & Time Management
Stress & strain Management
Benefits of Soft Skills training:-
Enhance and improve employable skills
The ability to communicate effectively with coworkers, employers, client s and customer s, friends and family members
The opportunity to enhance organizational skills
Improve Personal and professional effectiveness
Helps in promotions and upgrading Skills
Increased efficiency and leadership skills to improve team results
Development of presentation skills to promote more successful projects
Gaining the ability to recognize symptoms of stress and learning management strategies
Soft skills represent a fundamental at tribute to today’s knowledge based economy.
The Workforce Profile defined about 60 "soft skills", which employers seek. They are applicable to any field of work, according to the study, and are the "personal traits and skills that employers state are the most important when selecting employees for jobs of any type."
TOP 60 SOFT SKILLS
8. Team skills.
9. Eye contact.
12. Follow rules.
14 Good attitudes.
15. Writing skills.
16. Driver's license.
18. Advanced math.
20. Good references.
21. Being drug free.
22. Good attendance.
23. Personal energy.
24. Work experience.
25. Ability to measure.
26. Personal integrity.
27. Good work history.
28. Positive work ethic.
29. Interpersonal skills.
30. Motivational skills.
31. Valuing education.
32. Personal chemistry.
33. Willingness to learn.
34. Common sense.
35. Critical thinking skills.
36. Knowledge of fractions.
37. Reporting to work on time.
38. Use of rulers and calculators.
39. Good personal appearance.
40. Wanting to do a good job.
41. Basic spelling and grammar.
42. Reading and comprehension.
43. Ability to follow regulations.
44. Willingness to be accountable.
45. Ability to fill out a job application.
46. Ability to make production quotas.
47. Basic manufacturing skills training.
48. Awareness of how business works.
49. Staying on the job until it is finished.
50. Ability to read and follow instructions.
51. Willingness to work second and third shifts.
52. Caring about seeing the company succeed.
53. Understanding what the world is all about.
54. Ability to listen and document what you have heard.
55. Commitment to continued training and learning.
56. Willingness to take instruction and responsibility.
57. Ability to relate to coworkers in a close environment.
58. Not expecting to become a supervisor in the first six months.
59. Willingness to be a good worker and go beyond the traditional eight-hour day.
Life Skills Education results in bridging up communication barriers with parents and other adults. It enables young people to handle stressful situations effectively without losing one’s temper or becoming moody, learning to disagree politely with use of appropriate “I” messages, and assertive skills are important for development of self esteem, positive attitudes, making a firm stand on values, beliefs and cultural differences. When an individual learns all the basic skills to cope with challenges individuals will feel more confident, motivated, and develop a positive attitude towards life, thus, make more mature and adult like decision, starts taking responsibilities for their actions and in turn refrain from risk taking and risky behaviours and become more useful people for the next generation.


1 Lit Terms Take notes as we review each of these terms and examples.
2 Types of Writing Expository writing EXPLAINS something a process how something works Remember that EXPository EXPlains something.
3 Types of Writing Persuasive writing ARGUES something tries to convince the reader offers strong evidence to sway the reader PERSUASIVE writing is what we re focusing on for the Writing SOL.
4 Types of Writing Cause/Effect writing DESCRIBES something (a cause) and how it changes (or the effect it has on) something else Example: Poor dental hygiene leads to cavities and other issues.
5 Types of Writing Narrative writing TELLS a story and comes in many different forms.
6 Allegory A story or poem in which characters, settings, and events stand for other people or events (or for abstract ideas or qualities)
7 Alliteration The repetition of the same or similar consonant sounds in words that are close together Examples: For the first time in forever There are tons of tools here!
8 Allusion A reference to someone or something that is known from history, literature, religion, politics, sports, science, or another branch of culture
9 Ambiguity A technique by which a writer deliberately suggests two or more different, and sometimes conflicting, meanings in a work
10 Analogy A comparison between two things to show how they are alike Example: Square is to rectangle as circle is to oval.
11 Anecdote A short account or story about an incident that is usually funny, interesting, or biographical
12 Aphorism A short, pointed sentence expressing a wise or clever observation or a general truth; maxim; adage Example: The early bird catches the worm.
13 Apostrophe An arrangement of words addressing a non-existent person or an abstract idea in such a way as if it were present and capable of understanding feelings EXAMPLES: Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star Death be not proud Ugh, cell phone! Why won t you load my message?!
14 Archetype An old, imaginative pattern that appears in literature across the ages EXAMPLES: heroes, villains, tricksters, outcasts, rebels, misfits...
15 Atmosphere The mood or feeling you (the reader) get from the story or poem What is the atmosphere of each of these two pics?
16 Autobiography An account of a person s life written by that person You would write your own autobiography.
17 Biography An account of someone s life written by someone else Mark wrote Ellie s biography.
18 Character A person or animal that plays a role in a novel, play, or movie
19 Direct Characterization When the author openly tells the audience about the character and his/her/its traits
20 Indirect Characterization When the reader must infer a character s traits through his/her/its actions, thoughts, or appearance
21 cliché A cliché is an overused expression or idea. In good writing, you want to AVOID them!
22 Climax The high point or turning point of a novel, play, or movie When the author reveals or hints to the outcome
23 Conflict A problem Internal- a character s problem with him/herself External- a character s problem with another character, group, or force
24 Connotation an idea or feeling that a word invokes in addition to its literal or primary meaning an undertone
25 Denotation the literal or primary meaning of a word its dictionary definition
26 Diction style of speaking or writing as dependent upon choice of words
27 Fact a truth known by actual experience or observation something that can be verified
28 Opinion a personal view, attitude, or appraisal cannot be certain
29 Fact or Opinion? Truman was a President of the U.S. Truman was the best President of the U.S. Non-poisonous snakes make delightful pets. Gold was discovered in CA in 1848.
30 Figure of Speech Language that is not meant to be taken literally Similes, metaphors, personification, etc. all fall under the figure of speech umbrella
31 Metaphor A comparison in which one thing is said to be another (often unlike) thing
32 Personification Gives human qualities to non-human or abstract things Ex. Love is blind.
33 Simile A figure of speech where two unlike things are explicitly compared, usually using like or as to link them
34 Flashback A scene in a movie or novel that takes a character back to a time earlier than the main setting
35 Foreshadowing A warning or indication of a future event Beware the ides of March
36 Hyperbole An extreme exaggeration that is not meant to be taken literally I have a million things to do!
37 Dramatic Irony When the audience knows something that the characters in a book or play do not know
38 Situational Irony When the expected outcome does not happen Can be humorous or serious
39 Verbal Irony When someone says one thing, but means another for effect Similar to sarcasm
40 Mood The feeling the reader gets from a work of literature
41 Onomatopoeia A word formed from the association of the noise it makes Sizzle, cuckoo, chirp...
42 Oxymoron A figure of speech when apparently contradictory words are used in conjunction It s the same difference.
43 Paradox A statement that seems self-contradictory Ex. It is opposite day today.
44 Plot The sequence of events in a work of literature You can trace it on a plot chart.
45 Setting The environment in which a story or event takes place Typically developed at the beginning of a work
46 soliloquy When a character in a play gives a speech alone onstage Indicates the speaker talking to him or herself
47 Monologue A speech delivered by one person, usually in a poem or play
48 dialogue When characters are in conversation with one another Usually indicated by quotation marks
49 Dialect A form of language that is particular to a specific region or social group
50 Stereotype A fixed idea about a particular type of person or thing Usually a negative idea or prejudice
51 Style The way the author uses words in his or her writing
52 Suspense Feeling anxious or excited uncertainty about what may happen in the future
53 Symbol A material object that represents something immaterial Love, religion, trust, etc.
54 Theme The subject of a piece of writing
55 Tone The character or attitude of a piece of writing
56 Understatement The presentation of something being smaller, worse, or less important than it is
57 Protagonist The leading character in a work
58 Antagonist The force working against the main character in a work
59 Pun Word play that suggests two or more meanings of a word or words
60 Premise A previous statement from which another is inferred or followed as a conclusion
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What is a Value Conflict?
Conflicts are an inherent part of social existence because we are in constant competition for resources. We also are in conflict because we have different goals and different ideas about our place in society, what our rights, duties, and responsibilities to other people are, and what constitutes right, wrong, fairness, or justice.
We can call conflicts arising out of the evaluation of our own and others’ actions, motives, and notices about what is just and fair and what is good or bad behavior, value conflicts or moral conflicts. They are a result of different principles or codes of conduct we live by. Value conflicts are particularly difficult to resolve because once such attitudes form, they are very stable, and their preservation becomes part of our social and political identity. They often are the ideals we consider “worth fighting for.” (Although the author will discuss controversial issues for purposes of illustration, no position for or against any position is taken here.) Well, you can change. One might gain or lose faIth, or switch political parties. But such instances, if they are truly value-driven, should be extremely rare. It may be that the institution one belonged to has changed. Someone once said to the author “I did not leave the Church. The Church left me.”
Sources of Our Values
There are a number of sources for our values, each of which may exert more or less influence depending on our personal circumstances. The most basic values come from these sources:
- Our culture (especially individualism vs. collectivism)
- Our upbringing
- Our religion or personal philosophy
- Our political beliefs
- Our education
- Our profession
- Our life experience
Even when we share similar ideas of what constitutes right and wrong, we may prioritize them differently. What takes precedence? Our faith? Our family? Our political affiliation? Professional ethics? This will differ from person to person.
Perhaps our individualism and materialistic culture tell us every adult should be responsible for making their own way in the world, but our upbringing and religion teach us to give money to the poor. This internal conflict of values is called “cognitive dissonance,” and causes feelings of unease or confusion. But if one of these values ranks much higher than the other, the internal conflict will be easier to resolve.
The same situation illustrates how difficult it is to generalize values. Suppose my sibling shares my culture, my upbringing, my religion, and my political affiliation, but prioritizes these things differently, or perhaps has less money than I do. Perhaps she recently heard a news story about panhandlers with very high bank balances. Despite our similarities, our values and resulting behaviors may differ by a wide margin.
Two Kinds of Value Conflicts
The above discussion helps illustrate the difference between actual value conflicts and perceived value conflicts. Let’s take another example. Politics in the United States are currently extremely polarized. So if I say “I am a Democrat” or “I am a Republican,” without more, a listener Is likely to assume that he or she knows where I stand on a whole host of social and political issues on which the party has taken a public position. But though the leadership of the parties may claim that they should go elsewhere, there will always be dissenters from particular party policies or religious doctrines. Political parties, in particular, have been declining in influence since the 1950s; For example, three in ten voters, whether Republicans or Democrats, disagree with their party’s position on abortion. Similar results are found regarding other issues.
Recent research shows that a growing number of voters make choices based on policy details rather than party. The lack of ideological agreement means that group membership alone cannot predict his or her actual values. People reach the same policy results by different paths. Both Democrats and Libertarians support abortion rights, though they are far apart on other issues. Nor is political affiliation the only group membership that poorly predicts actual values. 56% of US Catholics support abortion rights and Only 8% of view contraception as morally wrong, despite clear Vatican teachings to the contrary. In America, at least, values appear to be individualized, discoverable only through dialogue.
This realization is critical because even a perception of value conflict where none exists will lead participants to see less opportunity for common ground and escalate the dispute more quickly. Disputants know that basic principles do not readily change and are disinclined even to try. More exploration of possible solutions takes place if the same dispute is framed as a conflict of interests.
So far we have discussed the difficulty of predicting values merely from group membership and the need to engage in dialogue to determine whether value conflicts exist. But what if values actually conflict? What makes value conflicts so difficult or even intractable and what steps can lead to dispute resolution?
Our examples thus far have not expressly discussed a value conflict between parties who did share worldviews or cultures. But this can easily happen and quickly lead to a dispute, as things one party thinks are normal and acceptable end up insulting or hurting the other parties. This can easily happen in business or even in the same family and can cause serious harm to relationships.
For example, did you know that a direct refusal is treated as a hostile act in some Middle Eastern cultures? Someone not familiar with the culture may consider a simple refusal morally neutral. But suddenly he or she has acted aggressively, and reciprocation or escalation might be expected. What could have been a profitable business venture becomes a value conflict.
Now let’s suppose three generations of a family from a collectivist culture are living in the same house. In this culture, elders are to be respected as authority figures and presumed to be correct, family harmony is paramount, and that the presence of conflict is a disgrace. Also suppose that, while the older generations are traditionalists, the adult granddaughter, having been born and educated in the U.S. has thoroughly adopted its individualist, rights-based approach.
One day, Granddaughter announces that she is dating a boy who does not share their ethnicity. Grandmother immediately says she should stop dating him. Granddaughter asks for an explanation. Grandmother says a boy from his own culture would be better. Granddaughter calls this racist and says she can date whom she wants. She is very upset. To end the conflict, Grandmother apologizes, losing face but avoiding the disgrace of continuing conflict before the rest of the family.
The situation also illustrates that something considered morally good in one culture may be considered bad in another. Some moral codes, like the Enlightenment values of egalitarianism, individualism, and preference for a reason common in the United States, focus on rights. But many more traditional, collectivist societies are hierarchical, emphasizing duty, virtue, and obedience, built on virtues. Modern individualists emphasize freedom, and its corollaries, inclusivity, and tolerance. They view an interracial or interfaith relationship or even such a marriage as unremarkable or even good. In their view, the freedom to date or marry anyone is a “right.” Traditionalists, however, might see it as evil — harmfully diluting their race or religion.
A few months after the announcement that they are dating, his granddaughter and her boyfriend break up. Despite this, silent tension continues between her and grandmother. She does not understand. But she violated her Grandmother’s values in the following ways:
- Not treating her grandmother as an authority figure;
- Demanding an explanation;
- Grandmother should have been presumed correct;
- Putting her individual desires above family harmony;
- Causing conflict within the family;
- Making her grandmother lose face by apologizing to end open conflict within the family.
It’s important to remember that everything the granddaughter did was perfectly acceptable in the individualist culture of the United States, just as a direct refusal was not considered hostile behavior in the previous vignette. Her peers might even praise her for “standing up for herself. ” The concerns of the older generation would likely be rejected as “old-fashioned,” but are based on actual events and represent real value conflict between individualist and collectivist norms.
Both conflicts arose out of ignorance and misunderstanding rather than hostility. Both could nonetheless result in badly damaged relationships.
Another source of misunderstandings is patterns of communication. Shared culture means shared rules of communication and shared meanings. Respect in one culture may mean being polite when you ask questions, respect in another culture may mean not asking questions at all. Honor in one culture may mean keeping one’s word. Honor in another may mean sacrifice for the sake of the group. In America, we are taught to look at our communication partners when we speak to them. But in other cultures, it is considered rude. The potential cultural differences in meanings, body language, things that “go without saying” and so on make misunderstandings common between those with widely differing values or cultures, and require thought, preparation and self-awareness to be overcome.
Another feature of value conflicts is mistrust. This may manifest as a feeling that the opposing value system is dangerous, or even that it is a threat to the continued existence of a way of life. The result of this is that the conflict becomes an all-or-nothing affair, with compromise impossible. That theme ran through the Cold War between the United States and the USSR, including crippling defense spending and support of satellite nations. It also explains the militarization and aggression of the State of Israel in the face of several wars and claims it had no right to exist. These attitudes persisted even after peace treaties were signed and the right to exist was officially recognized.
Domestically, the polarIzation of US politics may spring partly from the belief that long-standing, cherished rights and institutions (whether they be the electoral college, rights under the Second Amendment, the right to choose abortion, or something else) will be eliminated if an opposing party or candidate wins.
We react strongly to these perceived threats even if is objectively unlikely that the feared changes will come to pass. We do not want to live in a society in which such a thing is even remotely possible. A threat to something important makes us angry. Anger, in turn, energizes us, makes us suspicious, overeager to act, and risk-tolerant. It even physically prepares us for violence. In such a state, we are not analytical. We do not weigh probabilities accurately. We are ready to act and react, not to think objectively.
Hostile Communication Patterns
When we deal with somebody whose values are fundamentally different from our own, we may think of them as evil, lazy, dishonest, disrespectful, foolish, or otherwise fundamentally flawed. Or we may find their contrary position on a core issue simply incomprehensible. Because of this, and because we may feel anger at a threat to an important value, our communications with those on the other side of the conflict are often difficult and hostile. Rather than trying to reason with our opponents, we often resort to personal attacks, arguing, name-calling and indignation.
Let’s return to the abortion issue as an example. Suppose you believe that life begins at conception. Your parents and your church both taught you this, and the progress medicine is making in keeping very premature babies alive only strengthens your belief. This means that abortion under any circumstances is murder; regardless of how early it takes place, whether the mother is at risk or whether the pregnancy is forced. You can’t understand how anyone could believe otherwise. The fetus can’t develop unless it’s alive. To you those who undergo or perform abortions are murderers.
Those who support abortion rights cannot understand your perspective. Cell division is something very simple organisms do. It should not be the basis for preventing a woman from exercising autonomy over her own body. At the very least, they say, there should be another person involved, one whose rights weigh against those of the mother.
The personhood argument is often discussed in a medical ethics context. There is no accepted definition. Each test yields a different result. Does personhood begin with a heartbeat (6 weeks)? Pain response (8 weeks)? Self-awareness (up to 2 years)? Viability outside the mother (22 weeks)? The details of the debate are unimportant. The point is that the disputants are operating under very different assumptions— one using a bright-line test that takes no account of the woman’s desires or even threats to her health from the moment of fertilization, while the other is based on an indeterminate standard that gives maximum choice and safety to the woman. The existing legal standard is irrelevant except to the extent that it helped form one’s values or supports o favored position. Value conflicts are about the way things ought to be, not the way they are now.
The parties are operating under completely different assumptions and using different vocabulary, focused on concepts that may appear irrelevant to one another. Unable or unwilling to communicate with one another effectively, the disputants often stop talking to each other altogether. Reduced to insults, labels, slogans, and harsh words. What rhetoric there is serves to fire up one’s base or persuade new recruits to join the cause. Of course, the targets of our criticisms become defensive and respond in kind. A vicious cycle results. None of this contributes to the resolution of the dispute.
Social psychology research informs us that in-group members negatively evaluate members of out-groups. Additionally, there is an out-group homogeneity effect. That is, we tend to think of those unlike us as being all the same, even though we know that members of our own group are different from one another.
As previously discussed, those with value systems unlike our own are seen as strange, foolish, or bad, and ourselves as normal, wise, and good. Not surprisingly, this leads to avoidance behavior by both groups, meaning that they have little actual data about one another. When they do look for data, they will generally find information that supports their previous negative assessments. Not only do negative events stand out more strongly in our consciousness than positive ones, but also unless we make a real effort to counter it, we suffer from confirmation bias, the tendency to interpret new evidence as confirmation of our existing beliefs or theories. We also tend to rely on the most easily recalled information, rather than making the effort to search for more difficult to find data. Because we avoid contact with those of contrary value systems, we most easily recall stereotypes.
So rather than actual information, when we speak of those we are in moral conflict with we use sweeping generalizations and emphasize the negative. Finally, we are guilty of the fundamental attribution error. This is a cognitive bias that leads us to attribute negative outcomes to character traits and positive one to external forces. For example, if you are late, your tardiness is likely to be attributed to laziness or irresponsibility. However, if you are early, it is because of external factors such as light traffic.
Two methods of reducing the impact of stereotypes suggest themselves. First, the psychological literature indicates that contact with members of the stereotyped group reduces their impact, presumably because the need for them disappears with actual experience. However, if that contact includes instances of stereotypical behavior, however, that stereotype will be reinforced.
A second means of reducing reliance on negative stereotyping is perspective-taking, deliberately putting oneself in the place of the out-group, imagining their motivations, the hopes and fears they experience, and the obstacles they must overcome.
The Non-Negotiability of Values
Generally, conflicts end because the parties compromise or negotiate a resolution all can tolerate. That is a straightforward task when the issue is how much value each party should claim from a fixed amount, or when different priorities allow trade-offs and integrative solutions
But value conflicts are not like that. They spring out of our most important and deeply held beliefs m, and concern policy questions about whether certain things are acceptable in society or not. Such choices are binary, not incremental, and rarely subject to compromise. If I oppose abortion because all life is sacred, I would not allow “just a few” abortions to end the conflict. The taking of a life is wrong, and I cannot condone it. If I am morally consistent, I will also oppose capital punishment.
If exceptions are to be made, they should involve the protection of the same value, or one ranked even higher by us. For example, we might concede that abortion is permissible if the life of the mother is at stake because that choice balances the loss of a fetus —which might miscarry in any event— against a threat to the life of the mother.
Value conflicts are extremely emotional and sometimes violent. Participants sometimes violate their own values, claiming that the act was justified by the actions of the opponent. In this way, the murder of abortion providers has been rationalized as the only way to save the lives of unborn babies that otherwise would have been lost to legal abortion.
Why Value Conflicts Might be Intractable
Because they concern our most important principles, moral or value conflicts are often very difficult to resolve, long-lasting, destructive, and consist of a number of clashes over time. (Disputes with these characteristics are sometimes called “intractable”). Value conflicts often are considered intractable for a number of reasons. For example, the difference in which concepts are deemed important and how ideas are stated means that those caught in such conflict experience great difficulty in describing the underlying issues in shared terms. This makes it hard to understand one another.
Because they are arguing from different moral positions, they disagree about the significance of apparent issues. Someone who believes life begins at conception may be completely mystified by a debate over personhood. Disagreement about what issues matter makes negotiation or compromise extremely difficult.
Resolution becomes more difficult when parties disagree not only about the issues, but also about which forms of conflict resolution are morally right or politically palatable. A good example of this is the question of whether violence is ever justified.
Over time, the original issues often become irrelevant and new grievances arise from actions taken during the ongoing dispute. In moral conflict, actions that are acceptable to one side “prove” to the other side that they are fools or villains. Efforts to achieve resolution often cause further conflict. When the means of resolving conflict cause further conflict, the original issues are no longer important and the dispute becomes self-sustaining.
Dealing With Value Conflicts
How can practitioners of dispute resolution promote peace in seemingly intractable values disputes? While we have to admit that success will be difficult, there are some things we can try.
Get People Talking
The differing values of the other parties made them seem difficult to talk to and strange to us, and we respond by avoiding contact. This is counterproductive. Our disputes can’t be settled If we don’t talk to one another. We must have the courage to engage in dialogue.
Because not everyone who identifies with the group believes the same thing, we may discover that there are more shared values between us than we thought. If so, we are dealing with a perceived value conflict rather than an actual one, and the matter can be put to rest. Even if there is a real value conflict between us, it might be narrower than we think. To the extent we can find commonalities, we will reduce reliance on negative stereotyping, and discover the framework for an agreement.
Using storytelling to build empathy
Storytelling is as old as society itself. It is both a way to organize our thoughts and a way to hold the listeners’ interest. In the presence of a neutral third party, the disputants can tell their stories — how and why they became involved, what suffering the conflict has caused them, what sacrifices they have made, and what they hope to achieve.
Everybody has a story, and the interesting thing about them Is that they help build understanding and empathy. We recognize ourselves in the stories of those around us. We become invested in the well-told story. We develop empathy. We sympathize. While our worldview may not change, we understand the other person better. We may not want to be in conflict with them anymore. At least, we may renounce violence in favor of the peaceful resolution
Third parties can sometimes help the disputants reframe the conflict from a values-based zero-sum game to an achievable practical problem, like this:
Let’s not argue today about whether abortion should be legal. We can’t solve that issue. But in recent protests, there has been violence, and innocent people have been hurt and suffered damage to their businesses. I know that there are strong emotions on both sides, but the violence is unacceptable and hurts the cause on both sides. Can we agree there will be no more violence?
From here we might move forward to explore whether there were any circumstances under which abortion was acceptable. To protect the life of the mother? To protect the life of a stronger twin who would otherwise not survive? To protect the health of the mother? And conversely, under what circumstances is abortion definitely not acceptable? Must we change the law every time a younger premature infant is born alive, or can we set the threshold ahead of current medical outcomes?
In this practical way, reframing can make the intractable achievable, whatever the moral disputes. The participants can find ways to coexist while they wait for the world to change, without giving up their cherished values.
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