169話 大事な記憶
「なるほど、そういうわけでしたか」
少し強い口調で語り掛ける雨妹に、徐は予想外のことを言われたのか一瞬きょとんとした顔になる。
しかしすぐになにか反論しようとするので、雨妹は畳みかけるように言葉を紡ぐ。
「家族のためにただ琵琶を奏でただけの徐さんに、なんの罪があるというんですか?
雨妹はそうキッパリと断言した。
前世でもたまにいたのだ、事件や事故に巻き込まれての怪我で入院している患者で、「自分もなにか悪かったのではないか?」と自身の中に罪を見出そうとする人というのが。
今の徐も、まさにそれだ。
それに恐らくは失ったものが大きすぎて、その失って空いた穴を自身の力だけではどうにもできずに持て余しているのだろう。
時間の経過と共に穴を上手に埋める人や、穴を見ないようにする人というのもいるが、徐はどうやらそうした時間の恩恵を受け付けられない質であるらしい。
そして最後に決定打になったのが、国境へ出稼ぎに行った恋人の死の知らせであるようだ。
雨妹の話に、徐は「でも」と口にするが、その続きの言葉が出てこないでいる。
口を開けては閉ざしを繰り返す徐に、雨妹は屈んで牀に座る彼女と目を合わせた。
「徐さんの恋しいお方は以前から『自分が死んだら一緒に死んでくれ』と、そう仰っていたのですか?」
雨妹が責めるわけでもなく、ただ静かに問いかける。
「......そんなこと、言われたことがないね」
これに徐は戸惑い、しばし沈黙した後にそう漏らす。
「『一緒に死んでくれ』と言われた記憶はないのですね」
雨妹は徐の発言を確認する。
「では、彼とどのように語り合いましたか?
徐が目を見開いているが、どうやらこれまでこのようなことを考えもしなかったらしい。
雨妹は徐にそう促す。
――最後の別れの光景だけを延々と繰り返して思い出すのって、切ないし不毛だよ。
けれど恋人との思い出はもっとたくさんあったはずだ。
徐が考え込むように顔を伏せているが、その表情は少なくとも仄暗い目をしていなかった。
ここで、これまでの一連の流れを見守っていた男が口を開く。
「どうやら、本日の取り調べはここまでにしておいた方がよさそうだ。
Chapter 169: Precious Memory
"I see, so that's how it is."
Yui Mei declared with a bit of force in her tone, and Xu was taken aback with the unexpected reply.
However, Yui Mei saw that she was about to retort, so she immediately bombarded Xu with the things that she wanted to say.
"Miss Xu just wanted to play the lute for her family, so where is the sin there? There's no way you would know that the succeeding unfortunate events would happen, so you shouldn't mistake the truth for what it is. Miss Xu, you are also the victim here, and the criminal is the person who framed your family."
Yui Mei's reply was crisp.
In her previous life, there were patients who, upon hospitalization due to injuries sustained because of an incident or an accident, would question themselves whether they had done something wrong. They were obviously the victims, but they would lose sight of their own position because aside from the hassle of dealing with the aftermath, the other party would justify his actions so openly, sowing seeds of doubt in the victim's heart.
This was precisely what happened to Xu.
And because the things that she lost were too much for her to bear on her own, and the emptiness that it left probably made her feel that everything was spiraling out of her control.
There were people who managed to heal from that emptiness over time, while there were also those who chose to ignore it. Xu seemed to be one of those who weren't capable of finding solace in time.
Moreover, the news of the death of her lover who went to the borderland to work must've been the final blow.
Xu was about to refute Yui Mei's words, but found that she couldn't say anything.
She repeatedly opened and closed her mouth. She was sitting on the platform, so Yui Mei bent down and stared straight into Xu's eyes.
"Miss Xu, did your lover ever say 'you must die with me' to you?"
Yui Mei quietly asked, without any intention to reproach.
"...He never said such a thing."
Xu mumbled after a moment of silence and hesitation.
"It seems that you don't have any memories of him saying 'die with me', right."
Yui Mei repeated back to confirm Xu's words.
"Then, how did you talk with him? Did he tell you what he wanted you to do?"
Xu's eyes widened. It seemed that she hadn't thought about this.
Yui Mei encouraged her.
'It's really sad if you're only going to reminisce about the scene of your parting over and over again.'
However, the memories she had with her lover should be more than that.
Xu looked like she was deep in thought, but her expression was no longer clouded.
The man who had been silently watching over their conversation during the entire time suddenly spoke.
"It seems that it's better to end the interrogation here for today. Xu Zi, we'll talk again once you've calmed down."
Housekeeper of the Hundred Blossom Palace
百花宮のお掃除係～転生した新米宮女、後宮のお悩み解決します。
https://www.novelupdates.com/series/housekeeper-of-the-hundred-blossom-palace/
Fantasy Romance Shoujo Slice of Life
Adapted to Manga Ancient China Complex Family Relationships Different Social Status Female Protagonist Imperial Harem Love Interest Falls in Love First Reincarnated in Another World Royalty
https://ncode.syosetu.com/n4104ev/
黒辺あゆみ