<story><title>“Why did you shoot me? I was reading a book”</title><url>http://www.salon.com/2013/07/07/%E2%80%9Cwhy_did_you_shoot_me_i_was_reading_a_book_the_new_warrior_cop_is_out_of_control/</url></story><parent_chain><item><author>alexvr</author><text>In order to stay safe from the government,&lt;p&gt;1. Don&amp;#x27;t buy sparkling water if you&amp;#x27;re a college student&lt;p&gt;2. Don&amp;#x27;t bet with friends because an arbitrary threshold of about $2k warrants your execution&lt;p&gt;3. Don&amp;#x27;t tell American citizens that their government abuses its power, or you&amp;#x27;ll be charged with espionage&lt;p&gt;4. It&amp;#x27;s probably a bad idea to bear arms these days, because saying &amp;quot;Officer, I have a weapon in the trunk of my car&amp;quot; might give him reason to shoot you in self defense&lt;p&gt;5. You don&amp;#x27;t actually have free speech anymore, so be careful about that. If you threaten to shoot up a school, even jokingly and totally within your rights, you will be incarcerated for half a year before your trial. And who knows if the judge will let you off? You just have to pray for one who knows and abides by the constitution.</text></item></parent_chain><comment><author>JulianMorrison</author><text>Also don&amp;#x27;t be black, poor, trans, or a sex worker (and if you&amp;#x27;re black, poor and trans, you&amp;#x27;d better dress like a nun, or the police &lt;i&gt;will&lt;/i&gt; read you as a sex worker). People in those categories usually don&amp;#x27;t even make it as far as an outraged Salon article.</text></comment>
<story><title>“Why did you shoot me? I was reading a book”</title><url>http://www.salon.com/2013/07/07/%E2%80%9Cwhy_did_you_shoot_me_i_was_reading_a_book_the_new_warrior_cop_is_out_of_control/</url></story><parent_chain><item><author>alexvr</author><text>In order to stay safe from the government,&lt;p&gt;1. Don&amp;#x27;t buy sparkling water if you&amp;#x27;re a college student&lt;p&gt;2. Don&amp;#x27;t bet with friends because an arbitrary threshold of about $2k warrants your execution&lt;p&gt;3. Don&amp;#x27;t tell American citizens that their government abuses its power, or you&amp;#x27;ll be charged with espionage&lt;p&gt;4. It&amp;#x27;s probably a bad idea to bear arms these days, because saying &amp;quot;Officer, I have a weapon in the trunk of my car&amp;quot; might give him reason to shoot you in self defense&lt;p&gt;5. You don&amp;#x27;t actually have free speech anymore, so be careful about that. If you threaten to shoot up a school, even jokingly and totally within your rights, you will be incarcerated for half a year before your trial. And who knows if the judge will let you off? You just have to pray for one who knows and abides by the constitution.</text></item></parent_chain><comment><author>lawnchair_larry</author><text>6. Don&amp;#x27;t have $20 buy-in poker games&lt;p&gt;and Steven Seagal driving a tank into that guys living room for fighting chickens...wow.</text></comment>