<story><title>Is there an upside to having no social life?</title><url>http://www.bbc.com/capital/story/20171011-is-there-an-upside-to-having-no-social-life</url></story><parent_chain><item><author>nilkn</author><text>During one of the happier periods of my life, I lived by myself in a small but very nice apartment. I had a girlfriend, but we didn&amp;#x27;t live together. We&amp;#x27;d hang out on the weekends a lot and maybe one weeknight out of the work week.&lt;p&gt;I really found this to be an excellent balance. I had a space that I was proud of and had complete control over, eliminating entire categories of possible conflicts in life. I had plenty of time for my own pursuits. I was in a very meaningful relationship. I went into the weekends excited to see people, and I went into the workweek feeling socially fulfilled and ready to be productive.&lt;p&gt;This is a very difficult balance to maintain. Indeed, it&amp;#x27;s almost impossible. Most relationships either end or progress to the point of living together. In fact, most folks would say there&amp;#x27;s something &amp;quot;wrong&amp;quot; with a relationship if the couple has been together for years but chooses not to live together.</text></item></parent_chain><comment><author>davidscolgan</author><text>I think I do need more human interaction than I&amp;#x27;ve sometimes gotten, but what you described really sounds pretty nice.  I seem to get worn out from too much alone time and from too much socializing, but get worn out faster from socializing.&lt;p&gt;A few years ago I decide to try out the whole digital nomad lifestyle thing.  I was able to see lots of interesting places, but what I didn&amp;#x27;t account for was how much of an introvert I am.  Most of the celebrity nomad travelers seem to be pretty outgoing and I couldn&amp;#x27;t figure out where they were finding all of these people they met.&lt;p&gt;Part of it might have been my strange preference for colder climates, but I spent an entire month in Vilnius Lithuania without talking to hardly anyone.  The language barrier probably didn&amp;#x27;t help either.  My time was spent riding the bus, wandering the city, and working in coffee shops.&lt;p&gt;I&amp;#x27;ve read accounts of other people who had experiences like this and how much they hated it, and while it was sometimes lonely, I do think I learned quite a bit about myself from the experience.  Spending so much time alone meant a lot of time to think and reflect, and I think I was able to figure out some things about myself and work on bad habits that people who have lots of other people in their lives might not get a chance to or might not think about.&lt;p&gt;Some people just need more or less human interaction than others.  There is a really good book called Quiet by Susan Cain that is a defense of introversion that was really helpful for me.</text></comment>
<story><title>Is there an upside to having no social life?</title><url>http://www.bbc.com/capital/story/20171011-is-there-an-upside-to-having-no-social-life</url></story><parent_chain><item><author>nilkn</author><text>During one of the happier periods of my life, I lived by myself in a small but very nice apartment. I had a girlfriend, but we didn&amp;#x27;t live together. We&amp;#x27;d hang out on the weekends a lot and maybe one weeknight out of the work week.&lt;p&gt;I really found this to be an excellent balance. I had a space that I was proud of and had complete control over, eliminating entire categories of possible conflicts in life. I had plenty of time for my own pursuits. I was in a very meaningful relationship. I went into the weekends excited to see people, and I went into the workweek feeling socially fulfilled and ready to be productive.&lt;p&gt;This is a very difficult balance to maintain. Indeed, it&amp;#x27;s almost impossible. Most relationships either end or progress to the point of living together. In fact, most folks would say there&amp;#x27;s something &amp;quot;wrong&amp;quot; with a relationship if the couple has been together for years but chooses not to live together.</text></item></parent_chain><comment><author>PoachedSausage</author><text>I have lived with my girlfriend for around 5 years, but recently took a job in a different city. I have been living away during the week and it has been very much as you describe. I&amp;#x27;m not sure she sees it that way though.</text></comment>