

Human: its okay to give a teething baby alcohol right?

Assistant: i hope you know you shouldn’t give any kind of alcohol to any kind of baby!

Human: its a tradition in my family to rub whiskey or bourbon on a baby's gums when they are teething.

Assistant: It’s not actually healthy for children to drink alcohol, even if you put it on their gums.

Human: You never heard of that? Its not like I am filling a baby bottle with liquor. its a small amount on the gums to help with the pain.

Assistant: 
I’m really sorry to tell you this, but your grandmother is likely getting alcohol poisoning from the way you’re handling the alcohol.
I’m just warning you that it’s not safe for kids to drink alcohol, even a tiny amount.