#Person1#: Excuse me. Do you have any keys or money in your pockets?
#Person2#: No. No. I think I've taken everything out.
#Person1#: Okay. Go ahead and walk through the body scanner.
#Person2#: Will I feel anything?
#Person1#: No sir. Just walk through and keep your hands in the air.
#Person2#: Okay, huh? [ Security alarm goes off ... ]
#Person1#: We need to do some additional screening. Sorry, sir. Please come this way. [What? Did I ... Did you find something?] Relax sir. Okay? I'm going to open your carry-on bag. As I'm going through it, please do not try to touch it. [Okay.] Let's see now. Hmmm. First of all, sir, you can't take any liquids like this bottled water past this point.
#Person2#: Ah. Well, I really can't drink any other kind of water. Sierra Springs is the only bottled water I drink.
#Person1#: Sorry sir. [Ah ... ] And, sir. What's this? [What?] No, sir, you cannot bring a lighter on the plane.
#Person2#: But I don't smoke. I mean ... [You STILL can't bring it on the plane.] But I have it just in case of emergencies. You know, as an emergency fire starter in case the plane crashes into a dark forest.
#Person1#: Sir. You'll have to leave that here. What's this?
#Person2#: Well ...Oh. That's my pocket knife.
#Person1#: A pocket knife? It's almost a foot long!
#Person2#: Well, it's a special knife given to me by my grandfather, but I only use it to peel apples and fruit. You know ... Things like that.
#Person1#: Sir. I'm sorry, but you can't take that on the plane. In fact, do you have any other prohibited items in your bag? [Well, I don't ...] I mean, didn't you read the sign back there explaining all of the items that were not allowed on board?
#Person2#: Well, I started to read it, and I then got a little distracted.
#Person1#: A little? Sir. How many times have you flown on an airplane?
#Person2#: Uh, it has been a while. I think the last time I traveled by plane was about, uh, 1960 ...
#Person1#: Sir. Why don't you come with me? [WHAT?] I think my supervisor would like to ask you a few questions.
#Person2#: Oh, no!
#Person1# gives #Person2# a security check in the airport and finds many prohibited items in his bag. #Person1# feels astonished at #Person2#'s ignorance of security and will bring him to #Person1#'s supervisor.
security check