a kidwarmer : master gardener ~ welcome to kidwarmers ~
the funniest things kids say .
if we ever need reminders that god is in control , just listen to kids
and their uncomplicated and complete faith . the first story today shows
how with a very simple answer children can remind us of the essence of
things .
- - grace witwer housholder
get free software for your computer
hundreds of titles to choose from . you only pay postage .
in fact , order 4 disks and get free postage for the 5 th .
http : / / www . pocketwarmers . com / d
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
hundreds of our readers are saving a small fortune . . .
kidwarmer , heartwarmer and petwarmer subscribers are discovering the
tremendous benefits of using tel 3 advantage to make long distance and
international calls - - some saving 90 % ! get started now by calling :
800 - 330 - 6897 . when asked for your " activation code " say : 311 - 673 . or you
can click here to get complete details and sign up online :
http : / / www . pocketwarmers . com / c
the funny things kids say
tatum ' s grandma brenda and grandpa rube , have a vegetable garden with
tomatoes , squash and peppers . tatum was visiting with her parents and
brenda showed tatum , 3 , one of the home grown tomatoes . brenda asked , " do
you know who grew this ? " tatum looked at her grandma with big blue eyes
and very seriously replied " god ! " - - brenda and ruben salazar of grand
prairie , texas
on a recent vacation in florida the fred and cathie kreigh family went
for a boat ride . unfortunately , fred gets seasick very easily , and that
day was no exception . sam , 10 , got sick , too . feeling miserable , he told
his mom , " god made us all different . . . so why is it ' like father , like
son ? ' ( with regard to being seasick ) " - - cathie kreigh of kendallville ,
indiana
four years ago angela became mom to her 5 - year - old adopted son . she
is the only mom he has ever known , so they have a special bond . every day
before naptime they chat before his naptime song . he usually asks a
question that pertains to something you have to put in 5 - year - old terms to
understand . one day he asked , " what is your funny bone ? where is it
located ? " with 20 years of medical expertise , angela knew this was
something she could explain . she told him where it is and why god made us
with joints that bend . after listening very intently , he asked , " mom , did
god give us any sad bones ? " - - angela jones of jacksonville , florida
jacob , who lived on a farm , announced in a pre - school sunday school
class that they had a new baby calf . carol asked , " was is a cow girl or a
cow boy ? " with a look of disbelief , jacob said flatly , " it ' s a heifer ! "
- - carol young of albion , indiana ( the young fellow has since graduated
from high school )
molly ' s children blessed her life through the avenue of adoption . one
day their son , at the age of 3 , was riding his tricycle with a little boy
who lived across the street . they were riding in the garage on a rainy day
and molly overheard the boy say , " she ' s not your mother ! " politely , molly
told the little boy he had to go home and as she closed the garage door ,
she leaned on it and wept . then she felt a gentle nudge , and her precious
son said , " mommy , please don ' t cry . he just meant that i didn ' t grow in
your stomach ! " - - molly lemmons of mustang , oklahoma
diane ' s 2 - year - old grandson oggie was playing with his 3 - year - old
friend ian . ian said , " i ' m spiderman . what super hero are you ? " oggie
raised his fist in the air and shouted , " john deere ! " ( his grandpa jim has
brainwashed him with john deere t - shirts , hats , toys , etc . ! ) - - diane
schlemmer of lagrange , indiana
it was a sunny hot day and sherri had given lillian , 2 , an ice pop to
eat . it was the kind of frozen treat that is in a plastic tub ; you push it
up as you eat . lillian knew enough to push up the frozen part to eat it ,
but there was a lot of melted " juice " in the bottom so sherri said , " you
need to hold it up ( so the juice could be sipped ) . " but little lillian ,
eager to please , held the whole tube up , like the statue of liberty ! - -
sherri winther ( babysitter ) of huntington station , new york
one evening when her twin boys were 7 they were eating dinner and ben
announced , " i know what a french kiss is . " rose glanced at her husband
across the table , trying to retain her composure . they had always said
they ' d speak truthfully with their children , but intimacy was a topic they
had not yet addressed . rose took a deep breath and said , " you do ? what is
it ? " ben announced proudly , " it ' s when you kiss someone and they give you
a french fry ! " - - rose vanden eynden of cincinnati , ohio
when pat ' s granddaughter was in the first grade her mother was a
helper in her school room . one day she was helping a little boy and he
said to her , " oh mrs . carroll you smell so good . " she said , " well , thank
you . " the little boy continued , " what is it . . . bacon or sausage ? " - - pat
cook of lubbock , texas
joyce was staying with her grandchildren while their parents were on a
business trip . olivia , 4 , got a cold soon after her parents left . when
joyce caught it , too , olivia proudly reported to her grandpa , " i gave it to
grandma ! " also , when she was helping to fold laundry , she was upset when
clothes were " insided out . " - - grandma joyce of colorado springs , colorado
mallory , 3 , was driving on country roads after a visit to the lake . a
very strong skunk odor entered the van and the adults commented on how bad
the skunk smelled . mallory spoke up , " someone should give that skunk a
bath ! " - - ryan and dawn jackson ( parents of mallory ) of kendallville ,
indiana
have a kidwarmer to share ?
if you have a true story to share , please email it to kidwarmers
editor , grace witwer housholder by clicking here : mailto : graceh @ kpcnews . net
please include your location . every other month we award free books to
the people who have " winning stories " .
to cast a vote for your favorite story , email by clicking here :
mailto : graceh @ kpcnews . net and say , " i vote for . . . . " ( please vote for no
more than one story each week . )
booknotes
you may purchase " quotable kids " and the award - winning " the funny
things kids say " books ( volumes 1 , 2 and 3 ) from amazon . com by clicking
here : http : / / www . aristatech . com / p
for the visually impaired : " the funny things kids say " books are
available in book stores and libraries . audio cassettes for the visually
impaired may be requested from all regional and subregional libraries for
the library of congress ( order # cb - ihp - 909 ) .
next kidwarmer in your mailbox next tuesday .
to join kidwarmers ( it ' s free ! ) , send an email to :
join @ kidwarmers . com
to discontinue kidwarmers , send an email to :
remove @ kidwarmers . com
homepage , ad info and archives :
http : / / www . kidwarmers . com
archives prior to october 2000 :
note : you are welcomed to use , copy and share
these stories , but please reference
http : / / www . funnykids . com as the source .
to unsubscribe , click on the following web page .
your membership is listed as : projecthoneypot @ projecthoneypot . org
a kidwarmer : master gardener
~ welcome to kidwarmers ~
the funniest things kids say .
if we ever need reminders that god is in control , just listen to kids
and their uncomplicated and complete faith . the first story today shows
how with a very simple answer children can remind us of the essence of
things .
- - grace witwer housholder
get free software for your computer
hundreds of titles to choose from . you only pay postage .
in fact , order 4 disks and get free postage for the 5 th .
http : / / www . pocketwarmers . com / d
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
hundreds of our readers are saving a small fortune . . .
kidwarmer , heartwarmer and petwarmer subscribers are discovering the
tremendous benefits of using tel 3 advantage to make long distance and
international calls - - some saving 90 % ! get started now by calling :
800 - 330 - 6897 . when asked for your " activation code " say : 311 - 673 . or you
can click here to get complete details and sign up online :
http : / / www . pocketwarmers . com / c
the funny things kids say
tatum ' s grandma brenda and grandpa rube , have a vegetable garden with
tomatoes , squash and peppers . tatum was visiting with her parents and
brenda showed tatum , 3 , one of the home grown tomatoes . brenda asked , " do
you know who grew this ? " tatum looked at her grandma with big blue eyes
and very seriously replied " god ! " - - brenda and ruben salazar of grand
prairie , texas
on a recent vacation in florida the fred and cathie kreigh family went
for a boat ride . unfortunately , fred gets seasick very easily , and that
day was no exception . sam , 10 , got sick , too . feeling miserable , he told
his mom , " god made us all different . . . so why is it ' like father , like
son ? ' ( with regard to being seasick ) " - - cathie kreigh of kendallville ,
indiana
four years ago angela became mom to her 5 - year - old adopted son . she
is the only mom he has ever known , so they have a special bond . every day
before naptime they chat before his naptime song . he usually asks a
question that pertains to something you have to put in 5 - year - old terms to
understand . one day he asked , " what is your funny bone ? where is it
located ? " with 20 years of medical expertise , angela knew this was
something she could explain . she told him where it is and why god made us
with joints that bend . after listening very intently , he asked , " mom , did
god give us any sad bones ? " - - angela jones of jacksonville , florida
jacob , who lived on a farm , announced in a pre - school sunday school
class that they had a new baby calf . carol asked , " was is a cow girl or a
cow boy ? " with a look of disbelief , jacob said flatly , " it ' s a heifer ! "
- - carol young of albion , indiana ( the young fellow has since graduated
from high school )
molly ' s children blessed her life through the avenue of adoption . one
day their son , at the age of 3 , was riding his tricycle with a little boy
who lived across the street . they were riding in the garage on a rainy day
and molly overheard the boy say , " she ' s not your mother ! " politely , molly
told the little boy he had to go home and as she closed the garage door ,
she leaned on it and wept . then she felt a gentle nudge , and her precious
son said , " mommy , please don ' t cry . he just meant that i didn ' t grow in
your stomach ! " - - molly lemmons of mustang , oklahoma
diane ' s 2 - year - old grandson oggie was playing with his 3 - year - old
friend ian . ian said , " i ' m spiderman . what super hero are you ? " oggie
raised his fist in the air and shouted , " john deere ! " ( his grandpa jim has
brainwashed him with john deere t - shirts , hats , toys , etc . ! ) - - diane
schlemmer of lagrange , indiana
it was a sunny hot day and sherri had given lillian , 2 , an ice pop to
eat . it was the kind of frozen treat that is in a plastic tub ; you push it
up as you eat . lillian knew enough to push up the frozen part to eat it ,
but there was a lot of melted " juice " in the bottom so sherri said , " you
need to hold it up ( so the juice could be sipped ) . " but little lillian ,
eager to please , held the whole tube up , like the statue of liberty ! - -
sherri winther ( babysitter ) of huntington station , new york
one evening when her twin boys were 7 they were eating dinner and ben
announced , " i know what a french kiss is . " rose glanced at her husband
across the table , trying to retain her composure . they had always said
they ' d speak truthfully with their children , but intimacy was a topic they
had not yet addressed . rose took a deep breath and said , " you do ? what is
it ? " ben announced proudly , " it ' s when you kiss someone and they give you
a french fry ! " - - rose vanden eynden of cincinnati , ohio
when pat ' s granddaughter was in the first grade her mother was a
helper in her school room . one day she was helping a little boy and he
said to her , " oh mrs . carroll you smell so good . " she said , " well , thank
you . " the little boy continued , " what is it . . . bacon or sausage ? " - - pat
cook of lubbock , texas
joyce was staying with her grandchildren while their parents were on a
business trip . olivia , 4 , got a cold soon after her parents left . when
joyce caught it , too , olivia proudly reported to her grandpa , " i gave it to
grandma ! " also , when she was helping to fold laundry , she was upset when
clothes were " insided out . " - - grandma joyce of colorado springs , colorado
mallory , 3 , was driving on country roads after a visit to the lake . a
very strong skunk odor entered the van and the adults commented on how bad
the skunk smelled . mallory spoke up , " someone should give that skunk a
bath ! " - - ryan and dawn jackson ( parents of mallory ) of kendallville ,
indiana
have a kidwarmer to share ?
if you have a true story to share , please email it to kidwarmers
editor , grace witwer housholder by clicking here : mailto : graceh @ kpcnews . net
please include your location . every other month we award free books to
the people who have " winning stories " .
to cast a vote for your favorite story , email by clicking here :
mailto : graceh @ kpcnews . net and say , " i vote for . . . . " ( please vote for no
more than one story each week . )
booknotes
you may purchase " quotable kids " and the award - winning " the funny
things kids say " books ( volumes 1 , 2 and 3 ) from amazon . com by clicking
here : http : / / www . aristatech . com / p
for the visually impaired : " the funny things kids say " books are
available in book stores and libraries . audio cassettes for the visually
impaired may be requested from all regional and subregional libraries for
the library of congress ( order # cb - ihp - 909 ) .
next kidwarmer in your mailbox next tuesday .
to join kidwarmers ( it ' s free ! ) , send an email to :
join @ kidwarmers . com
to discontinue kidwarmers , send an email to :
remove @ kidwarmers . com
homepage , ad info and archives :
http : / / www . kidwarmers . com
archives prior to october 2000 :
note : you are welcomed to use , copy and share
these stories , but please reference
http : / / www . funnykids . com as the source .
to unsubscribe , click on the following web page .
your membership is listed as : projecthoneypot @ projecthoneypot . org