At this point this guy is a lost cause. I am not willing to give him another chance to become a better person. He's a sociopath killer. His childhood doesn't excuse his behavior. Lots of people had abusive childhoods, and we choose, either continue the cycle or be the parents  children deserve. My husband & I both came from abusive homes but we decided before we had children that we were not going hurt our children. We agreed prior to having kids that if either of us ever hurt our kids, that the first time would be the last time. That we would not accept that, we would divorce and the other parent would be the guardian. No I won't do it again. No making excuses for the other parent, no forgive & forget, no 2nd chances, no staying together for the sake of marriage & if appropriate, pressing charges because children come first. So I know that shitty childhoods suck, but cycles can be broken. How many chances does he get? I don't want to chance my family's safety in the crossfire.