What I'm about to write will upset you if you think this situation is simple and can be resolved easily. Traumatized and victimized people (I'm writing this because I'm a retired psychotherapist who has worked with many such individuals) need to be deeply heard and understood, and must dictate the terms of engagement, if they are to feel safe and understood.  Otherwise, they feel undermined, hurt, angry and
dismissed.  This is extremely sensitive territory, and applies to all human beings who
have been through a kind of hell, even if from a non-victim's perspective, it seems unreasonable.  The only effective apporach  is to listen, empathically, hear what they have to say, try to understand everything from their point of view. You don't have to agree with everything that's said, but you do have to go along with it, if healing and resolution is to
occur.  Truth and reconciliation is painful, slow and costly, but effective.