Right--so what it means to be married, the very definition of marriage, the very essence of reality was changed at the completely subjective and arbitrary whims of five justices.  

You didn't just change or adopt the law to allow for gay couples to have visitation rights, next of kin rights, etc,. Five justices arbitrarily decided that they were going to take it upon themselves to create something that had never existed before to address these issues that congress should have addressed, namely, they created gay marriage out of thin air.  

They did not have to create an entirely new institution from thin air.  In fact, they did not have to do anything.  They should not have even gotten involved in the first place. This was not an issue for the courts, this was an issue for congress. Remember?  Congress is supposed to make law, not the courts.