OH, so it is love that prompts a priest to deny a funeral to a family member, to tell them they must lie about their deceased family member's life, and to tell them that any mention of the person who was most beloved by that family member will mean all of them can just grieve alone.

Jesus would not approve such unkind treatment of people in the midst of grief.  You are not a follower of Jesus but, apparently, quite a follower of the pharisees.  I suggest you read about Pope Francis' homily of October 17.  He addresses the issue of priests who worry so much about the law that they forget God's bigger than the law.  

Frankly, mj, if I thought you were getting anywhere near enough to speak to me I would run like the devil was after me- you are that scary.  I will pray for you.