I think of "tolerance" as a sort of minimum of respect. Toleration is far from the fulfillment of charity and humility, but surely those qualities must be present, to some degree, to allow that minimum? Isn't it possible that in using the term, people are calling for a modest exercise of charity and humility? 

"Tolerance" rubs me the wrong way, as well. It seems a meager portion for us to grant each-other, given the abundance of God's gift of love to us all. But unsatisfying as "tolerance" is as a destination, perhaps it's an early step in the right direction.