You start out with "so WO is suddenly a "non-essential", then end up with "If you don't want to be vigorously opposed, stop mistaking theological ant mounds for mountains that you must defend."

Why anyone vigorously defend an ant mound?

The youth are leaving some churches because they have no comfort and have outgrown the congregation.  They want to know HIS rights and wrongs.  They want to feel HIS comforts and protections.  They want adults that can and do stand for HIM and can lead them to HIS feet.  They do not want "I's, me's, my's or mine's, they want HIM and HIS.  They know there is nothing else other than HIM and HIS.  They know there is more, than what is offered.

"Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings."  The youth are capable and can read the requirements, as well as fully Gifted by HIM to understand and see the failures.  They can see the ones that demand "I'm right and you have to see things my way", when there is only HIS way.