Everyone has different things they like and don't like. I'm quite happy here, living within easy reach of the city but not living IN the city with all the negatives you described.  Kinda the best of both worlds for me, although it helps that I'm retired and don't have a work commute.

Nearby O/G development (and there is a lot nearby me) isn't ruining anything for my tastes, and I like that it keeps my property taxes from being as high as nearby counties.  I'd rather have it operating nearby than a shopping center or a smelly pig farm or something that brings more people and more traffic.