What can I do about my roommate's drinking problem?
My roommate has had a drinking problem for a while. She goes out, gets trashed, and then expects everyone to take care of her. The next morning, she apologizes constantly until she feels validated. She also thinks everyone hates her all the time. If I don't seem anything other than happy, she asks me "Do you hate me? You hate me. Tell me you love me," and I feel like I have to pity her because she has also been suicidal before.
Lola Georgwww.GeorgAssociates.com
It does sound like your roommate may have a drinking problem, and the short answer is that you can't do anything about it, only she can. We can't change what other people say, think, or do. We can only change our reactions. It does sound like your roommate may be having a hard time. You can suggest that she enter counseling or therapy. You can reassure her that you like her (if that's true), but you don't have to pity her.
Teman sekamar saya sudah memiliki masalah minum selama beberapa waktu. Dia pergi keluar, mabuk, dan kemudian mengharapkan semua orang merawatnya. Keesokan paginya, dia terus meminta maaf sampai dia merasa diperhatikan. Dia juga berpikir bahwa semua orang membencinya sepanjang waktu. Jika saya tidak terlihat bahagia, dia bertanya kepada saya "Apakah kamu membenciku? Kamu membenciku. Beritahu aku bahwa kamu mencintaiku," dan saya merasa harus merasa kasihan padanya karena dia juga pernah berniat bunuh diri sebelumnya.
Sepertinya teman sekamar Anda mungkin memiliki masalah minum, dan jawaban singkatnya adalah bahwa Anda tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa tentang itu, hanya dia yang bisa. Kita tidak bisa mengubah apa yang orang lain katakan, pikirkan, atau lakukan. Kita hanya bisa mengubah reaksi kita. Sepertinya teman sekamar Anda mungkin sedang mengalami masa sulit. Anda bisa menyarankan agar dia memasuki konseling atau terapi. Anda bisa meyakinkannya bahwa Anda menyukainya (jika itu benar), tetapi Anda tidak perlu merasa kasihan padanya.