Maɗigo da yawaitarsa cikin al’umma: Ina mafita? - Shafin makala - Bakandamiya
#kiwon lafiya #abinci #wadatar zuci #rayuwa #zaman duniya #satan amsa #makaranta #al'ada #tarbiya #madigo #Arewacin Najeriya #meat pie #snacks #girki #kayan motsa baki #tarbiyar yara #miyagun kwayoyi #cututtuka #illar shan taba #ciwon huhu #hayakin taba #kudan zuma #magani da zuma #taron gwamnonin arewa #gwamnonin arewa a kaduna #matsalar rashin ilimi #nonon uwa zalla #Wutan lantarki #electricity #lissafin karfin lantarki #matsalolin social media #yadda ake danbun kaza #ciwon cikin al'ada #al'adar mata #dalibai a makaranta #nasarar jarabawa #jarrabawan dalibai #final exams #abinci mai kara lafiya #arafat day #ranar arafa #hajji #ciwon suga #illar wayar salula #namijin goro #amfanin namijin goro #alfanun namijin goro #kaddamarda Olam Grain a Chikun LGA #inganta ilmi a Nijeriya #siyasa da yaudara #Illolin madigo #madigo cikin al'umma #kimiyyar taurari #yadda ake gas meat #zakkatul fitr #zakkan fidda kai #hukunce-hukuncen addini #sinadarai masu guba #toxic substance #heavy metals #alluran rigakafi #kariya daga sinadarai masu guba #kayan kamshi #spices #amfanin kayan kamshi #amfanin abinci #ciwon basir #maganin ciwon basir #piles #hemorrhoids #ciwon hawan jini #hypertension #maganin ciwon hawan jini #blood sugar level #cutar gyambon kafa #kula da lafiya #ciwon kafa #bakin ciki da damuwa #depression and anxiety #bakin ciki a wurin matasa #matsalar shaye-shaye #shaye-shaye a Najeriya #binciken wayar miji #matsalolin aure a Arewa #madigo zalla
Posted by Rahmatu Lawan Aug 20 - Filed in Rayuwa da Zamantakewa - #madigo #Illolin madigo #madigo cikin al'umma #madigo zalla - 456 views
Tasowarmu muna kanana cikin alumma mun ga iyayenmu da sauran magabata suna da aure. Kowa da mahaifinsa da mahaifiyarsa. Hakanan kuma yayin da muke rayuwa mun ga ‘yan mata da samari daban-daban sun taso kuma mun ga sun yi aure. Kuma sannan sa’i da lokaci mutum kan sami labarai daban-daban na wance na bin maza ko kuma wane na neman mata. Duk dai hakan baya wuce tsakanin na mijin ne da mace. Kuma wannan shine al’adar dan adam, kai harma da dabbobi, a ko ina. Amma a yau labarin ya sha bamban. Annoba da ya zo mana gadan-gadan har ya kai halin ni ‘ya su, shine wai mata ke neman mata ‘yan uwansu da sunar madigo zalla don tsabar lalacewar zamani. Kuma labarin ya zama ruwan dare kowa zai tabbatar maka da hakan.
Akasarin lokaci idan ire-iren wannan labari ya zo mana ko kuma mun ganshi sai mu kau da kawunanmu da tsammanin cewa ai wannan lamari bai shafe mu ba. Ko kuma mu yi shiru mu kyale zancen da tunanin cewa wannan shirun zai sa abin ya wuce. To a wannan labarin abin ya fi karfin kauda kai ko nuna ko in kula domin kuwa dukkanmu da ni da kai ya shafemu don ya shafi matasanmu wadda ‘ya’yanmu ne da kannenmu, ko kuma zai iya shafan zuri’armu da ba a haifa ba ma. Saboda haka wannan abu ne da ke bukatan gaggawa da kuma saka hunnun kowa da kowa domin ceto rayuwar kanmu da kanmu.
Abinda ya bani mamakin wannan lamari harda su madigo Facebook group da madigo Whatsapp group da sauran social media groups suke da shi don taimakawa junansu masu yin wannan fitina.
Abinda na ke hange wadda ya bani tsoro shine tun ana kauda kai ana Allah wadarai anan kasashenmu idan ba mu yi hankali ba zai zama normal kamar yadda kasashen yammacin duniya suke ta kokarin zamar da shi. Wani abin mamaki da takaici shine a kasashen Turai, a kasar Iceland misali, a shekarar 2009 har zaben Firaiminista suka yi wacce ta kasance lesbian. Saboda haka Johanna Sigurdardottir, ta kasance mace ta fari mai matsayin Firaiminista wacce ta fito fili ta yi ikirarin cewa ita yar maɗigo ce. Haka zalika, a shekarar 2017, Firai ministar Serbia, Ana Brnabic ta kafa tarihi wajen shiga taron gangami na 'yan maɗigo da luwadi. Ta yi hakanne da zummar nuna goyon bayanta garesu, wacce ita ma kanta 'yar maɗigon ce. Ana Brnabic itace mace ta farko kuma first openly gay a tarihin kasar wacce ta rige wannan ofishin.
Yanzu ko ince tuntuni a kasashen turawa aure suke yi wadda kuma cikin wadannan kasashe da dama cikinsu sunma hallarta abin, misali a kasar Amurka. A da su kan yi auren amma ba don kasarsu ta halatta ba. Kuma suma al’ummarsu da dama suna nuna musu kyama da Allah wadai. Amma a yau sun sami rinjaye sosai inda idan mutum ya fito ya nuna rashin goyon bayanshi a gare su sai a dauke shi kamar wani racist ne. Yayin da a yanzu an lankayawa duk wanda ya nuna kyamar maɗigo ko luwaɗi da cewa homophobic.
To ni abinda ke daure min kai, wai shin me ke kawo mata suke shiga wannan lamari ne? Shin wai wannan lamari kam sabon abu ne kamar yadda muke ganinsa koko yanar giko ke kara hura wutar abin kasancewa duniya ya zama dunkulalle wuri guda.
A bincike da na yi su wadannan masu wannan dabi'a na madigo sun yi imani shi wannan dabi’a ba wani disorder bane kamar yadda mutane da dama suke zato. Su imaninsu shine wai different sexual orientation ne da su inda suke gani cewa ai haka Allah Ya halicce su.
To amma idan ka dubi abin a fuskoki da dama wannan lamari ya sabawa hankali ta ko ta ina. Misali idan ka dau ɓangare haihuwa. Ko shakka babu idan aka yarda da maɗigo to haihuwa kuma karewa zai yi tunda Allah da Ya hallice mu ya yi mu ne dauke da kwayan halittan ɗa na miji da kuma ƴa mace wanda idan babu wannan to ba mutum ko dabba ba zai samu. Wasu sai suce ai akwai mafita tun da mutum na iya bada kyautar maniyinsa, wato sperm donation, ko kuma a je gidan marayu a dauki yaro a goya, wato child adoption.
Ace mun yarda da sperm donation mata biyu sun yi aure suna bukatan haihuwa, sun sami donor ya ya basu sperm sun yi nasara an yi haihuwa lafiya. To ɗan da aka haifa mene ne matsayin shi, ya na da uba ko bai da shi? Technically mun san yana da uba to amma ina uban yake? Babu. To kun ga ankawo wa shi wannan ɗa matsala a rayuwarsa har abada, musamman irin matsaloli da zai fuskanta a wajen jama’a. Bincike ya nuna yara da suka tashi a irin wadannan gidaje sukan fuskanci matsaloli bila adadi fiye da takwarorinsu waɗanda suka taso a normal gida mai uwa da uba. Dubi wannan bincike da aka wallafa a wani biomedical journal wato PMC Journal ta kasar Amurka.
Kuma ai kusan duk mun sani kamar yadda uwa ta ke da muhimmanci haka uba ya ke wajen tarbiya da kula da yara.
A wani ɓangaren kuma shi wannan sperm donation din ma yana da na shi irin matsalolin barkate.
A takaice zan iya cewa wannan daɓi’a na maɗigo kawai hallaya ce ta banza da dan adam ya ƙirƙiro wa kansa da sunan wai “this is how they feel and that everyone should be allowed to express how they feel.” Kuma a hakan suke neman su laƙayawa wasu ta hanyar jan ra’ayinsu da cewa ai Allah ne Ya halicce su a haka.
Wannan ke nan. To amma wai shin mene ne dalilan da kan sa mutane faɗawa cikin wannan ɗabi’a tsakan rana?
A wani bincike da muka gudanar a Bakandamiya - duk da cewa sakamakon bai isa ya zamanto an yanke hukunci a kan wannan lamari ba - ya ba da wani haske. Ga wasu daga cikin abinda na ke ganin ke iya jefa mata da dama cikin harkar maɗigo.
Zamani: A yau muna cikin wani zamani ne mai rikitarwa wadda ya zo mana da abubuwa kala-kala. Wasu dabi’un da a baya ake kyama da hantara yanzu sai kaga sun zama abin ado. Maɗigo na daya daga cikin ire-iren wadannan abubuwa. Duk da cewa har yanzu mutane da dama suna kyamarsa, to amma idan aka sake zai fara zama ba komai ba kamar yadda matsayinsi yake a kasashen turawa da dama. Suma kansu turawan a dan shekaru kaɗan da suka wuce ba haka abin ya ke ba.
Rashin samun auren mata: Da alama yawaitar rashin yin aure a tsakanin ‘yan mata na jefa wasu mata cikin wannan harkar. Duk da cewa ba a taru aka zama daya ba tunda wasu matan da aurensu suke aikata wannan masha’a. Amma lallai rashin samun aure na iya jefa mace cikin wannan lamari domin bincike ya tabbatar da hakan. Kuma idan ta saba ko ta yi aure zai yi wuya ta daina.
Rashin ilimin addini: Sanin kowa ne addini ya nuna haramci, da babban murya, na madigo da danginsa irin su luwadi. Saboda haka idan mace ta samu ilimin addini dai-dai gwargwado zai yi wuya ta fada cikin wannan dabi’a. Duk da cewa wasu kan take sani su yi abinda ransu ke so, to amma samun ilimin zai taimaka wajen rage mata masu faɗawa cikin wannan bala’i.
Abota da masu daɓi’ar: Wai an ce, nuna min abokinka sai in gaya maka ko kai wanene. Wannan gaskiya ne. Abokai na taka rawa sosai a cikin rayuwar mutum. Ko dai kai ka rinjaye su, ko kuma su rinjaye ka. Saboda haka abota da mace ‘yar madigo na iya jefa yarinya cikin hatsarin madigo. Wannan kuma ya shafi ‘yan mata hadda wasu matan auren.
Internet: A wannan zamani ba wani magana da za muyi mu manta da zancen Internet da yadda yake da tasiri a cikin rayuwarmu. Wannan tasiri na Internet ya mai da samun information cikin sauki. Hakan ya sanya wannan dabi’a ta madigo kara bazuwa da kuma tasiri sosai. To wasu matan ta amfani da Internet su kan koyi madigo, ko ma su hadu da wasu abokai da za su rinjaye su. Bincike ya tabbatar akwai dubban groups a social media daban-daban na ‘yan maɗigo.
Kallace-kallacen fina-finai da karance-karancen littatafan ‘yan madigo: Kasuwan fina-finai da na littattafai cike yake makil da labaran lesbian da su gay a yanzu. So idan mace ta kasance ba ta da wani dabi’a sai wadannan kallace-kallacen ko karance-karancen idan ba a yi hankali ba za ta iya fadawa cikin hatsarin shiga harkar madigon.
Shaye-shaye: Idan mace na shaye-shaye akwai yiwuwar ta fada cikin wannan dabi’a na maɗigo, musamman idan tana tare da masu yi. A yayin da take hali na maye ba abinda ba zata iya aikatawa ba.
Mai karatu na iya duba wannan makala da ta yi bayani akan matsalolin da shaye-shaye ke jefa mata a Arewacin Najeriya.
Makarantar kwana (boarding school): Tabbas ‘yan mata da yawa masu yin maɗigo sun koyo shi ne a boarding school domin a wurin za ka tarar ba irin macen da babu ita. Idan ba a yi sa’a ba yarinya ta faɗa hannun abokiya mai yi, kuma hukumar makaranta basa kula sosai, sai ki ga itama ta faɗa ciki tsundum. Kuma idan an saba a makaranta sai ki ga an dawo gida an ci gaba da yin hakan.
Rashin wayarwa yara kai da wuri: Dabi’ar mu ne musamman mu a Arewacin Najeriya na rashin iya yi wa ‘ya’yanmu magana akan sensitive topics. Wani lokacin saboda rashin sani sai kaga yara sun fada cikin irin abubuwa masu hatsari. Idan yarinya ba ta san zancen maɗigo ba ko kuma iyaye da ya kamata su hankaltar da it aba su yi hakan ba sai ki ga ta je ta samo wrong information akan abin. Kafin a farga sai ki ga yarinya ta fada a ciki. Allah Ya kyauta.
Bayan sanin wasu daga cikin dalililan da ke sa mata shiga harkar maɗigo, to amma mene ne abinyi? Ni a gani na ya kamata iyayen su lura da waɗannan abubuwa, la’alla ko zamu samu saukin wannan fitina a cikinmu. Na ambaci iyaye ne domin daga nan komai ke farawa..
Mai da hankali akan tarbiya. Ta hanyar kula da bawa yara ilimin addini da kuma kokarin cusa tsoron Allah a zukatansu.
Sannan a bangaren abokai kuma a kula da irin abokan da yara kan yi hulɗa da su. Abokai ba kawai na wadda ake gani ba harda na Internet. A rika kokarin sanin irin abokai da suke hulda da su.
Sannan idan yarinya ta isa aure kuma ta sami miji na kwarai a yi ƙoƙarin aurar da ita. In ko aure bai samu ba akwai hanyoyi da addini ya shinfida don rage fitinu da matasa da akan iya faɗawa ciki.
Sannan iyaye su tabbatar hukumomin makarantu na boarding suna kula da tarbiyar yara da suke makarantunsu sosai. Shirye-shirye na wayar da kai akan illar maɗigo da kuma kula da abubuwan da yara ke ciki su zamanto gaba-gaba na muradin makarantun.
A karshe ina fatan Allah zai shige mana gaba Ya karemu da zuri’armu baki daya daga fitinu wannan zamani. Allah Ya sa mu a tafarki madaidaiciya, amin.
© 2019 Bakandamiya Game da Mu Talla Terms Privacy Support Tuntube mu Android App IOS App Mobile Site