Poor Seth MacFarlane. Until Sunday night, hosting the Oscars must have seemed so easy. What did he have to do, really, to shine? Avoid inexplicable cross-dressing and increasingly slurred words à la James Franco, try not to pull a Ricky Gervais and openly offend half the nominees, and he'd be a hit. It's such an impossible task, hosting an awards show; the best you can hope for is not to bomb. 
 
 Then Tina Fey and Amy Poehler took the stage at this year's Golden Globes. Lovely, brilliant and utterly fearless, they made awards-show hosting an art form again, helming three hours of occasionally hilarious, occasionally emotional and surprisingly enjoyable TV. 
 
 The Golden Globes, man; who knew? 
 
 PHOTOS: Golden Globes 2013 red carpet 
 
 The show's opening dialogue had only one flaw — it had to end. Introducing the Globes as the only awards show in which "the beautiful people of film rub shoulders with the rat-faced people of TV," Poehler and Fey, both nominated for actress in a comedy or musical series, never stopped smiling even as they confused the acronym for the Hollywood Foreign Press Assn. with a disease and, within the first few minutes of the show, brought audible gasps from the audience by effectively ending the controversy regarding "Zero Dark Thirty." 
 
 "I haven't paid much attention," Poehler said, "but when it comes to torture, I trust the lady who spent three years married to James Cameron." 
 
 Poehler has the best deadpan in the business, wide-eyed and enthusiastic, responding only to the alternate universe occurring within her brain; Fey is a close second, somehow managing to project both oblivious security and hyper-alert insecurity with the same expression. "Anne Hathaway is here for her performance in 'Les Misérables,'" she said, adding that she "had not seen anyone as alone and abandoned since you were on stage with James Franco at the Oscars." 
 
 PHOTOS: Nominees & winners | Red carpet | Best & Worst 
 
 Fey also gave a shout-out to "Jennifer Lawrence, star of 'Silver Linings Playbook,' and Quentin Tarantino, the star of all my sexual nightmares," while Poehler announced that Meryl Streep, though nominated, was not present because "she has the flu. And I hear she's just fabulous in it." 
 
 Seriously, they could have done an hour set and everyone would have been happy. Not since Jimmy Fallon hosted the Emmys three years ago has an awards show been this much fun. 
 
 Not only did the quality of the hosting further legitimize an event that the entertainment media inevitably go out of their way to disparage even as they grant it Oscar-like coverage, Poehler and Fey proved once and for all that the choice of host really does matter. 
 
 PHOTOS: Highlights from the show 
 
 Beyond providing specific hilarity throughout the show, they infused the telecast with a sharp professionalism that made room for a surprise visit by former President Bill Clinton, a show-stoppingly hilarious set by presenters Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell (front-runners for next year's hosts) and a deeply felt but undeniably strange speech from Jodie Foster. 
 
 By deftly trodding the line between audacious and sarcastic, the hosts sustained an atmosphere that was both inclusive and sharply comedic, relying on their improv skills and longtime friendship to help the telecast live up to its reputation as the loosest and most revelatory of the awards shows. 
 
 Clinton's unprecedented appearance to introduce the clips of "Lincoln" (not to mention Steven Spielberg's undeniably smug little salute of welcome), a win by "new mum" singer Adele and the introduction of Foster's at times baffling speech by her much more lighthearted friend Robert Downey Jr. didn't hurt either, giving the show a "what next?" quality rare to the genre. 
 
 Golden Globes 2013: List | Best & Worst | Winners | Ballot | Show moments | Quote 
 
 So when Paul Rudd and Salma Hayek gamely endured a broken teleprompter, when Hathaway thanked Sally Field for providing a "Flying Nun" to "Norma Rae" career trajectory, when Jennifer Garner took time out from her role as presenter to thank the folks (George Clooney and Grant Heslov) that her husband, Ben Affleck, had just left out of his acceptance speech for directing "Argo," when Lena Dunham of HBO's "Girls," winning for actress in a comedy or musical, thanked her fellow nominees for helping her surivive middle school, the show did feel like a genuine industry party rather than an overly produced parade of mechanical self-indulgence (although there was inevitably some of that too). 
 
 Changing costumes and taking the stage after they both lost to Dunham, Fey hoisted her cocktail and said: "Congratulations, Lena Dunham, I'm so glad we were able to get you through middle school." Which would have been the best line of the night, had Poehler not decided to close the show by saying, "Thank you, good night and we're going home with Jodie Foster." 
 
 Beat that, McFarlane. 
 
 ALSO: 
 
 PHOTOS: Show highlights 
 
 
 
 PHOTOS: Best & Worst moments at the Globes 
 
 PHOTOS: Red carpet fashion at the Golden Globes 
 
 mary.mcnamara@latimes.com ||||| You knew going into it that The Golden Globes were bound to be funny. Nearly every joke told or stunt pulled by hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler was solidly, often exceedingly, funny, from Poehler’s line “When it comes to torture I trust the woman married for three years to James Cameron” to Fey’s admonition to Taylor Swift to “stay away from Michael J. Fox’s son” — startled-looking, handsome Sam Fox, this year’s Mr. Golden Globe. 
 
 But there were also big laughs from unexpected sources, such as winner Jennifer Lawrence solemnly thanking producer Harvey Weinstein for “killing whoever you had to kill to get me up here.” Less funny? Professional funny-men presenters Sacha Baron Cohen (he ended up seeming more like a Les Miserables groupie than an equal among co-stars) and Jay Leno (joking about his implacable authority in late night made him seem surprisingly tin-eared about what might strike the audience as amusing). 
 
 Jodie Foster’s speech in accepting the Cecil B. DeMille Award was kind of extraordinary — simultaneously eloquent, rambling, too long, funny, heroic, encoded, and ultimately very moving. 
 
 I’d say that awards shows should stop showing clips from nominated movies (they drag down the pace, and who hasn’t seen these in TV spots?) — except that rule wouldn’t have allowed for one of this night’s many surprises: Bill Clinton hep-catting out to introduce the Lincoln clip. 
 
 Other surprises that registered on my Surprise-O-Meter included the Argo wins, and Mandy Patinkin not winning for Homeland. Ed Harris was excellent in Game Change but, jeez louise, this was Mandy’s year, Globes! I was left as slack-jawed as Mel Gibson looked all night… 
 
 And Lincoln screenwriter Tony Kushner aced out by Quentin Tarantino for Django Unchained? Tarantino has written better; Kushner’s script was as amazing as — well, as Daniel Day-Lewis described it in his own eloquent acceptance speech. 
 
 As far as the TV awards went, I predicted the Homeland wins for best drama and actress (Claire Danes) and the Girls wins for best comedy and Lena Dunham as actress, but mistakenly thought Jeff Daniels would pull off a surprise Newsroom win, only to have Damian Lewis take the trophy. 
 
 On the other hand, were you surprised to see Kevin Costner win for Hatfields and McCoys? Not me. Neither did Don Cheadle’s House of Lies victory. All in all, in my will-win TV picks, I was seven for nine — pret-ty, pret-ty good, as Larry David would say. 
 
 Taken as one long broadcast, this year’s Golden Globes proved to be, overall, a fine night for, as Poehler put it at the start of the evening, “the beautiful people of film rubbing shoulders with the rat-faced people of television.” On this night, the rats were equal to the royalty. 
 
 Twitter: @kentucker ||||| Here Are the 12 Best & Worst Moments at the 2017 Golden Globes 
 
 Even without the peerless co-hosting talents of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler -- we'll miss 'em stewarding Hollywood's drunkest awards show always -- plenty of memories were made at Sunday night's (Jan. 8) Golden Globes, both good and bad. (Many of both types featured the Globes' new host, Jimmy Fallon.) Here are the moments that should be inspiring the most extended buzzes and brutal hangovers tomorrow morning. 
 
 BEST MOMENTS 
 
 Billy Bob Thorton vs. Bob Odenkirk 
 
 Never lacking for misanthropic style, Billy Bob Thorton used his surprise win for Best Actor in a Comedy Series as an opportunity to settle a puzzling fictional score with vanquished co-nominee Bob Odenkirk: "Bob and I have had a feud since the 1940s when we did a movie with Van Johnson -- remember that, Bob? And we've had a little thing ever since. So, there you go, bud." Made as much sense as Billy Bob's indoor sunglasses, and was just as amusing. 
 
 Donald Glover's Migos Shout-Out 
 
 "Not for being in the show, but for making 'Bad and Boujee.' That’s the best song…ever.” How quickly we forget about "Black Beatles" -- but still, close enough. 
 
 Denzel Washington, Having a Moment 
 
 And we hadn't even gotten to Meryl Streep's speech yet. 
 
 ?ulia Louis-Dreyfuss 
 
 Not a bad look with the hair pick and glasses, but most memorable was just JLD's presented-without-comment DJ impression -- a faux-scratch here, a knob twiddle there, and a perpetually undistractable facial expression. 
 
 "Fantasia Day" 
 
 Without Tina and Amy, nothing more reliable at the Golden Globes than Kristen Wiig and a worthy comedic partner shaming all other pre-award banter with a routine that's confusing, unpredictable and at least mostly hilarious. Her and Steve Carrell did the legacy proud this year with their tragic remembrances of the first time they ever saw an animated movie; Wiig while her three dogs were being put down, and Carrell just before his parents got divorced: "I never saw my father again after that day… Fantasia day…” 
 
 Barb in the opening musical number 
 
 But only if we all agree that this is the last time, and we're all gonna let it go after this. 
 
 Brian Tyree Henry and Keith Stanfield, beaming 
 
 Tough for Donald Glover to top his Migos moment, but although his speech for Best Actor in a Comedy was damn strong, the emotional heavy lifting was done in the crowd, where Glover's two Atlanta co-stars were shown clutching each other like a couple of tearfully proud parents. A moment of true poignance, even more so because now we can look forward to the possibility of it somehow being integrated into an upcoming season two episode. 
 
 Meryl's speech 
 
 Meryl Streep's anti-Trump speech at The Golden Globes touches on protecting journalists RT @goldenglobes: pic.twitter.com/FTubRjDN5T — Dan Rather (@DanRather) January 9, 2017 
 
 Raw, heartfelt, necessary and earned -- and for us in the press, more ennobling than we sometimes deserve. 
 
 WORST MOMENTS 
 
 Take that, Mariah Carey 
 
 Jimmy Fallon experienced a monitor mishap of his own to begin the live portion of his Golden Globes hosting, so he deflected any potential virality to a predecessor who'll forever have him trumped, Mariah Carey: "She thinks that Dick Clark Productions sabotaged my monologue." Took him until the next time he was out to come up with that zinger, too. 
 
 "Hidden Fences," not once but twice 
 
 To be fair, Hidden Fences does sound like a pretty good movie title. But, uh, still not a particularly good look for Michael Keaton, Jenna Bush, or anyone. 
 
 Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn's forgotten-glasses schtick 
 
 Is the best we can do for this duo a series of never-funny jokes about misreading the teleprompter? Between this and the "Formation" video remake, it's like Amy and Goldie think they have to try way harder than they actually do to be funny and awesome together. 
 
 The doubly aggressive play-off music 
 
 Questlove def feels bad about pumping in the play 'em off music like producers are in his ear like "BLAST IT" and he's like "guys be nice!" — Jeff McDev (@JeffMcDev) January 9, 2017 
 
 Yeah, we all want to get out of here and go to sleep, but this is just getting insulting. ||||| share tweet pin email 
 
 The 74th annual Golden Globe Awards had one big winner this year — "La La Land." 
 
 The musical led the Globes' feature film awards with seven nominations, and then won every single one of them, including Best Actor and Best Actress honors for its stars, Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling —breaking the Golden Globes record for most awards won by one film. 
 
 Here were some of the evening's biggest moments. 
 
 An epic opening number 
 
 NBC via Getty Images Jimmy Fallon performs in the opening sequence for the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards. 
 
 Jimmy Fallon kicked off the night's ceremony, broadcast live from the Beverly Hills Hilton Hotel, with a pre-taped star-studded musical sequence that spoofed the opening of "La La Land." 
 
 Fallon was joined by his fellow "Saturday Night Live" alum Tina Fey, his pal Justin Timberlake and many of the night's nominees including Ryan Reynolds, Nicole Kidman, Sarah Paulson, Amy Adams, John Travolta and the "Stranger Things" kids (including Barb!) in the dazzling musical intro. 
 
 The number, which found the Hollywood A-listers breaking out in song and dance also found Fallon and Timberlake romantically slow-dancing together. 
 
 It was the 42-year-old "Tonight Show" host's first time emceeing the famously fun ceremony, which honors the best in film and television, as chosen by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. 
 
 Fallon's failing Teleprompters 
 
 NBC via Reuters Host Jimmy Fallon presents during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards show on Jan. 8, 2017. 
 
 Fallon's opening monologue didn't go quite as well as the musical number. Within seconds of him walking onstage, the funny man burst out laughing, informing viewers his Teleprompter wasn't functioning properly. But he quickly recovered, making several cracks about the 2016 U.S. presidential election. 
 
 "As always, the ballots for tonight's Golden Globes were carefully tabulated by the accounting firm of Ernst and Young and Putin," he quipped. 
 
 "The People v. O.J." nab early awards 
 
 Getty Images Executive Producer Nina Jacobson accepts the award for Best Television Limited Series or Motion Picture Made for TV for ""The People v. O.J. Simpson": American Crime Story" during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards. 
 
 After its sweep of the 2016 Emmy Awards, "The People v. O.J. Simpson," which led the Globe's TV nominations with five nods, started the night off big with wins for both lead actress Sarah Paulson and the miniseries itself (Best Television Limited Series or Motion Picture Made for Television). 
 
 Getty Images Sarah Paulson accepts her award for Best Actress in a Limited Series or Motion Picture Made for TV for her role in "The People v. O.J.: American Crime Story." 
 
 Following her Emmy win months ago, Paulson's first-ever Golden Globe toasted her now-famous portrayal of former Los Angeles County prosecutor Marcia Clark. 
 
 Paulson thanked "the remarkable" Clark in her acceptance speech. "You are an inspiration to me," she said. "If I could live with a fraction of your wit, integrity, and your unapologetic fierceness, I would be on the road to doing it right." 
 
 "La La Land" hits all the right notes 
 
 NBC via Reuters Ryan Gosling holds his award for Best Actor, Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy for "La La Land" during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards. 
 
 But it was "La La Land" that was music to the foreign press's ears. 
 
 Ryan Gosling accepted the award for Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy by paying tribute to his real-life love, Eva Mendes. "While I was singing and dancing and playing piano and having one of the best experiences I’ve ever had on a film, my lady was raising our daughter, pregnant with our second, and trying to help her brother fight his battle with cancer," Gosling said. 
 
 "If she hadn’t taken all that on so that I could have this experience, it would surely be someone else up her other than me today. Sweetheart, thank you," he continued before dedicating the award to the memory of Mendes' brother, Juan Carlos. 
 
 Later, Gosling's co-star Emma Stone won in her category, and immediately thanked her mother, Gosling and others. "This is a film for dreamers," she said. "Hope and creativity are two of the most important things in the world." 
 
 Director Damien Chazelle also picked up a Best Director's award and a Best Screenplay award. 
 
 A win for Affleck (Casey, that is) 
 
 Getty Images Casey Affleck accepts the award for Best Actor in a Motion Picture - Drama for his role in "Manchester by the Sea." 
 
 Casey Affleck won his first Globe in the Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama category for his riveting work in "Manchester By The Sea." 
 
 No Globes for Portman (or Ryder) 
 
 In one of the night's most surprising upsets, French actress Isabelle Huppert ("Elle") beat two-time Globe winner Natalie Portman for Best Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama. Portman's performance as Jackie Kennedy in "Jackie" has been wowing critics for months, and the actress, currently pregnant with her second child, was considered a lock-in by many. 
 
 Portman's "Black Swan" co-star, Winona Ryder, was a buzzed-about contender for a Best Actress in a Television Drama for her role in Netflix's "Stranger Things," but she was bested by "The Crown" star Claire Foy. 
 
 A first-time win for Tracee Ellis Ross 
 
 Reuters Actress Tracee Ellis Ross holds the award for Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series - Musical or Comedy for "Black-ish" during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards. 
 
 Tracee Ellis Ross, one of the night's many first-time nominees, nabbed her first Golden Globe in the Best Actress in a TV Comedy category for her portrayal of Dr. Rainbow Johnson on "Black-ish," and became the first black actress to win in the category since Debbie Allen's 1983 win for "Fame." 
 
 Ross, daughter of pop music superstar Diana Ross, dedicated the award to "all of the women of color and colorful people whose stories, ideas, thoughts are not always considered worthy." 
 
 RELATED: Golden Globes red carpet: Best-dressed list of 2017 
 
 It's Brad! 
 
 HANDOUT / Reuters Brad Pitt presents during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards show on Jan. 8, 2017. 
 
 Brad Pitt stepped out from the wings to introduce the motion picture "Moonlight," nominated for six awards. The A-lister, who recently separated from his wife, Angelina Jolie, amid child abuse allegations, was cheered wildly by his peers. 
 
 Metz and more first-time nominees 
 
 AP Chrissy Metz arrives at the 74th annual Golden Globe Awards at the Beverly Hilton Hotel on Sunday, Jan. 8, 2017. 
 
 Chrissy Metz was one of the night's many breakout stars with her first-ever Golden Globe nomination for Best Supporting Actress on NBC's "This Is Us." In fact, the actress's category consisted entirely of first-timers, including her co-star, Mandy Moore, Olivia Colman (“The Night Manager”), Lena Headey (“Game of Thrones”), and Thandie Newton (“Westworld”). 
 
 In the end, Colman took home the Globe. 
 
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 Robots, royals and more drama 
 
 The Best TV Drama category heated up with exciting and diverse new shows. First-time contenders included HBO's spooky robot drama "Westworld," NBC's family ensemble "This Is Us," Netflix's royal series "The Crown," and its retro sci-fi thriller "Stranger Things" Whom do they face off against? HBO's critically acclaimed dragon drama "Game of Thrones." 
 
 "The Crown" nabbed the award. 
 
 Amy and Goldie, together 
 
 Getty Images Amy Schumer (L) and Goldie Hawn onstage during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards on Jan. 8, 2017. 
 
 When funny ladies and "Snatched" co-stars Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn presented the award for Best Motion Picture Comedy or Musical to Gosling, they brought down the house with their hilarious schtick. 
 
 "In our new movie, Amy and I play mother and daughter,” said Hawn. 
 
 “I play the daughter,” interjected Schumer. “Although I read for both parts.” 
 
 Hawn, who said she left her glasses at home, repeatedly flubbed words on the Teleprompter. "Best Motion Picture Comedy or Mystical," Hawn said, squinting. 
 
 "Musical," Schumer corrected her. 
 
 "The nominees of five of the most tainted men," Hawn tried again. 
 
 “It’s talented. Kurt, do you have her glasses?” Schumer asked looking into the audience for Hawn's longtime beau, Kurt Russell. 
 
 RELATED: Best Golden Globes tweets, Instagrams: Celebrities share behind-the-scenes pics 
 
 And the Cecil B. Demille Award goes to ... Meryl! 
 
 Handout / Getty Images Meryl Streep accepts Cecil B. DeMille Award during the 74th Annual Golden Globe Awards on Jan. 8, 2017. 
 
 Viola Davis presented her former co-star Meryl Streep, nominated for her 30th (!) Golden Globe for her performance in "Florence Foster Jenkins," with the night's most prestigious award for her outstanding body of work. (The actress holds the record for most Globe wins with a whopping eight awards.) 
 
 Streep accepted the award with an impassioned speech about the divisive presidential election and its outcome, and called on the press to be vigilant in its political reporting. She concluded tearfully, "As my friend, the dear departed Princess Leia, said to me once, 'Take your broken heart and make it into art.'" 
 
 Victory for Viola 
 
 Davis nabbed her own award for her role in "Fences," an adaption of a 1983 August Wilson play. The actress thanked her husband, Julius Tennon, and their young daughter, Genesis, before thanking her father, Dan Davis, whose life, she said, shared similarities with the main character of "Fences." 
 
 In memoriam 
 
 Speaking of Princess Leia, the ceremony honored the late mother-daughter duo Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher with a brief film reel featuring some of their most iconic films including "Singing in the Rain" and, of course, "Star Wars." ||||| Foster, accepting a Cecil B. DeMille lifetime achievement award at the ripe old age of 50, gave a rambling but heartfelt acceptance speech about everything under the sun: being in show business all her life, guarding her privacy, being a mother, being a daughter. It was very moving — and utterly baffling. It will take many days for a full exegesis of the text, so everyone get to work on that. 
 
 Oh, and the awards? Big wins in the film categories went to “Argo” for best picture (drama) and to Daniel Day-Lewis for his portrayal of the 16th president in “Lincoln.” Also, a few awards for (hold your applause, haters) “Les Miserables” for best picture (musical/comedy) and acting awards to its stars Hugh Jackman (best actor) and Anne Hathaway (best supporting actress). Ben Affleck won for directing “Argo”; Quentin Tarantino got the screenwriting award for “Django Unchained”; Jessica Chastain won a best actress (drama) prize for “Zero Dark Thirty.” 
 
 Amid all the Golden Globes’s noisy chatter, bungled cues and awkward technical glitches (real-life “Argo” agent Tony Mendez couldn’t be heard during his moment onstage) that have come to define this opening rite of the awards season, Fey and Poehler administered the requisite stage slaps at Hollywood with fairly tame jokes that came at completely affordable expense to James Cameron and James Franco, as well as Meryl Streep, who, Poehler said, “is not here tonight. She has the flu — I hear she’s amaaaaayzing in it.” 
 
 And, of course, there was a joke about the host of the previous three Golden Globes, Ricky Gervais, who “could not be here tonight because he is no longer technically in show business,” Fey said. 
 
 “We have no intention of being edgy or offensive tonight,” Poehler added, “because, as Ricky learned the hard way, when you run afoul of the Hollywood Foreign Press [Association], they make you host [the Golden Globes] two more times.” 
 
 Perish the thought, ladies. You’ve done your duty. 
 
 In television categories, winners included the stars and makers of Showtime’s hit “Homeland,” which, in an echo of the Emmys, won best drama, as well as best actor (Damian Lewis) and actress (Claire Danes). Yes, even with all that implausible nonsense fans suffered near the end of Season 2. Go figure. 
 
 HBO’s uncomfy but often brilliant show “Girls” won best TV comedy (because sometimes “Girls” is funny). Its creator/writer/star, Lena Dunham, also won a best-actress prize. “It took a village to raise this very demented child,” Dunham said, about herself. (Or about her show?) That upbringing seems unfinished; Dunham, in a charming way, is a woman who really does come across as a girl. ||||| Emmy winners expect texts from friends and family to flood in after their acceptance speeches. If you’re Amy Schumer, those "friends" include your hilarious A-lister bestie, Jennifer Lawrence. 
 
 "Jennifer sent me a really sweet text," Schumer told ET backstage after the show. "She said that I looked pretty but not smart." 
 
 WATCH: Amy Schumer Reveals Why She Would Never Host the Emmy Awards 
 
 
 
 Schumer gushed about her friend’s obvious comedic chops, and talked more about the movie the two are working on together! 
 
 "She's the real deal funny," the comedian said of Lawrence. "My sister and Jen and I wrote a movie together so we're gonna hopefully be shooting that in a year or something. We're busy!" 
 
 It was a great moment, but hardly the Trainwreck star’s only breakout from a big Emmy night. Here’s a few more hilarious Schumer standouts. 
 
 "WE ARE AMY" 
 
 Schumer took the stage with Amy Poehler to present the award for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series and it was just as delightful and hysterical as we could have hoped. The two -- who orchestrated a funny bit before they took the stage -- were happy to present one of the early awards, because, as Schumer explained, "I have a blackout scheduled for 10 p.m." 
 
 "Let’s not forget what tonight is really about," the comedian told the crowd. "Celebrating hilarious women and letting the internet weigh in on who looks the worst." 
 
 WATCH: Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Schumer Danced Barefoot on Billy Joel's Piano in Chicago 
 
 
 
 TRUMP CARD 
 
 
 
 Schumer’s writing team for Inside Amy Schumer was nominated for Best Writing for a Variety Series, and while they lost out to The Daily Show, they might have won the award for best introductory montage (notoriously creative in this category) which featured each writer photoshopped into a picture with Donald Trump, ending with Schumer herself as 1980s-era Ivana Trump. 
 
 
 
 BIG WINNER 
 
 
 
 Schumer’s Comedy Central show did take home a win for Best Variety Series and the leading lady’s acceptance speech was unexpectedly emotional, but unsurprisingly great. 
 
 "Thanks everyone who has helped me," the comedian said sincerely, including "the girl who gave me a sort of smoky eye." 
 
 WATCH: The Emmy Awards Spoiled a Bunch of Shows and People Were Very Upset 
 
 
 
 
 
 KEEPING HER PRIORITIES STRAIGHT 
 
 
 
 "Nothing will ever compare to being spanked by Madonna but I'm happy to put this on my mantle," Schumer joked to ET backstage after her win. 
 
 
 
 KHALEESI WHO? 
 
 
 
 Schumer epitomized #SquadGoals post-Emmys, snapping a pic with the Game of Thrones cast backstage after their win for Outstanding Drama Series, captioning it "My real family." 
 
 My real family pic.twitter.com/bGqV1XUgYi — Amy Schumer (@amyschumer) September 21, 2015 
 
 Congrats, Amy! 
 
 WATCH: Amy Schumer and Amy Poehler Totally Ruled the Emmys Stage! ||||| Furthermore, the Golden Globes' governing body, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, has been a reliable source of cynical insider humor since the last night’s final presenter, Michael Douglas, was a toddler. The go-to joke about the HFPA used to be that nobody knew much about the group except that they were professional parasites who knew how to throw a party. Now both Hollywood insiders and showbiz-savvy viewers know exactly who's in the group -- a motley crew of 95 writers for overseas publications -- and the go-to joke has evolved into more or less what Robert DeNiro said while accepting his Cecil B. DeMille Award for career achievement last night: "The important thing is that we are all in this together: the people who make the movies, and the Press Association members who in turn pose for pictures with the movie stars." (The group was sued last week by its former publicist for running what amounted to a massive, ongoing payola scheme, selling nominations for bribes and giving lesser-known media outlets good spots on the red carpet in exchange for cash payments.) 
 
 Second, it’s not as though the Golden Globes ceremony had much dignity to lose. Stars attend and viewers watch not in spite of the event's junior-prom after-party atmosphere, but because of it. On the Oscars and Emmy broadcasts, it’s a big deal when people go off-script, act like fools, or bite the hands that feed them. On the Globes telecast, we expect such behavior and feel disappointed if we don’t get oodles of it. 
 
 First, gleeful needling has been that comic’s stock-in-trade for about two decades, and the awards show’s governing body, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, hired Gervais to host the broadcast in 2010 as well. Unless you're a complete dunderhead, you don’t invite a scorpion into your tent without expecting him to sting you, especially after inviting him in exactly one year earlier and getting stung 23 times in the face. 
 
 The telecast reminded me of the last 30 minutes of a Friar’s Club roast, when the facade of good-natured ribbing has disintegrated and you're left with the spectacle of sadomasochists whipping each other, only it was like that all the way through -- an orgy of hatred and self-hatred interrupted by flashes of warmth, pride, nostalgia and wit, like pretty much any other awards show telecast times 10. From the instant Gervais kicked things off with a description of Charlie Sheen’s thug high jinks (Bold humor! Risky, too!), to his mention of presenter Robert Downey Jr.'s past drug addiction and jail stint (Bolder still!), to the final zoom-out over Gervais exclaiming, "Thank you to God for making me an atheist!" (OK, actually bold) the show was awkward and sour -- and not just because Gervais was behind the podium, doing his patented Lovable Dick routine (but a tad more lazily than before, and with greater vanity; no more self-directed fat jokes for this slimmed-down clown). 
 
 At the same time, however, the show was sort of amazing, because it captured the mix of naive sentimentality and rancid cynicism that defines showbiz -- and the audience's relationship to showbiz. The 68th annual Globes proved, more vividly than the mostly staid and self-mythologizing Oscar and Emmy broadcasts, that there is, in fact, a Hollywood community, that its members truly do respect one another for all kinds of reasons, and that when you put a few hundred of its most popular and/or accomplished denizens in the same ballroom, there’s a chance that the tribal hierarchies will dissolve for a few hours and they’ll see each other not as enemies, obstacles or undeserving slugs, but as peers and inspirations. ("I can’t believe we’re sitting at a table with Al Pacino, either!" said Terence Winter, accepting the best dramatic series award for his HBO series "Boardwalk Empire.") 
 
 And yet this very same group will summon the self-doubt and self-loathing that’s also a part of entertainment and project it through your TV screen in waves -- the deep-rooted fear that maybe success is less about talent than who you know and who you’ve screwed, and whether you’re strong enough to endure rejection and lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time; that perhaps this industry really is as childish, shallow and sleazy as everybody says; and that the Golden Globes -- and perhaps by extension all showbiz awards -- are so corrupt and worthless that they deserve to be mocked and reviled by the likes of Gervais. (As Humphrey Bogart snarled at Peter Lorre in "The Maltese Falcon," "When you're slapped, you'll take it and like it!") 
 
 Robert Downey Jr. zapped Gervais with the wittiest of the night’s aggrieved counterattacks -- "Aside from the fact that it's been hugely mean-spirited with vaguely sinister undertones, I’d say the vibe of the show has been pretty good so far, wouldn’t you?" -- then introduced the nominees for best actress in a comedy or musical with a meandering riff about how he’s tried to sleep with all of them. (Nothing mean-spirited or vaguely sinister there.) The crowd applauded actress Melissa Leo’s award as best supporting drama actress for "The Fighter," then chortled like a bunch of second graders when she thanked the film’s director, David O. Russell, for casting her "after those few hours we spent in the Maritime Hotel." ("No, no, no, no, you don’t know what kind of girl I am!" Leo exclaimed. "It’s all work, man!") And would you say it's time for Gervais to drop the "I created the original English version of 'The Office,' and now these money-grubbing Americans are ruining it" shtick? Yes, I know, it's all in jest, and it was funny the first 4,378 times he did it, but it's started to wear a bit thin now -- and when he did it yet again while introducing the NBC version's outgoing star, Steve Carell, the actor's characteristic blank-slate deadpan cracked open to reveal what looked like actual resentment. ("Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha," said Carell. "It never gets old.") 
 
 It was the sort of evening where such driven, prideful perfectionists as David Fincher, Paul Giamatti, Jane Lynch and Katy Sagal could seem genuinely self-deprecating while accepting their awards (and in Lynch’s case, hilarious, too), and "Glee" co-writer and co-producer Ian Brennan (Lynch’s personal dialogue writer) could thank the underpaid public schoolteachers of America without seeming like a phony. And it was the sort of evening where Downey, Tom Hanks, Tim Allen and even HFPA boss Philip Berk could ream the host for being a vicious snot and hypocritical bully ("Next time you want me to help you qualify your movies, go to another guy," Berk snapped, after Gervais joked about lifting him off the toilet and putting in his false teeth) while the broadcast’s guest of honor, De Niro, could joke that the ongoing scandal had caused members of the group to be deported "along with most of the waiters ... and Javier Bardem." (None of Gervais’ jokes were bleeped, but something got cut out of the middle of De Niro’s speech, right around the point where he mentioned the titles of films that weren’t represented in his tribute reel; I’m guessing it was a joke about the corruption allegations that was censored for legal reasons, something along the lines of "Christ, maybe the check didn’t clear.") 
 
 The extremes of charm and rancor, affection and venom were all of a piece. There were no transcendently awesome moments along the lines of Ving Rhames giving his award to Jack Lemmon in 1998, but the mix of moods and attitudes was something to see. And the best bits of writing and delivery suggested that -- contrary to Gervais' rather disappointing example -- it is, in fact, possible to be sour and sweet at the same time. 
 
 Maybe Robert Downey Jr. should host next year, with De Niro as his sidekick. ||||| Below, read a full transcript of the speech that nobody could stop talking about. N.Y.F.C.C. member and BuzzFeed News critic Alison Willmore also filmed a complete video that offers some much-needed context—the many-armed goddess that loomed over the stage; the cocktail Haddish sipped from for dramatic impact—and shows how Haddish’s own delivery made her jokes land. Anyone preparing to give a speech at the Golden Globes this Sunday now has the unenviable challenge of topping this one. 
 
 After Haddish’s speech, the rest of the winners and presenters couldn’t stop themselves from referencing her. Edward Norton, who took the stage immediately after to present the best-supporting-actor trophy to Willem Dafoe, said, “This is awkward, but Tiffany Haddish just gave Willem’s speech word for word.” And Timothée Chalamet, accepting the best-actor prize for his role in Call Me by Your Name, threw in a reference to the unlikely fruit-sex connection between his film and Girls Trip: “Tiffany, you know grapefruits very well. I know peaches.” 
 
 As a ceremony that is not aired on television—and hands prizes to winners who already know they’ve won—the gala, held in the cavernous TAO Downtown, is always an intimate and chummy event. But it rarely reaches the volume of a packed comedy club, as it did when Haddish took the stage with an 18-minute acceptance speech, which included references to Skype sex, a joke cut from Girls Trip for being too raunchy, and a lot of flirting with Michael B. Jordan. 
 
 The Girls Trip star accepted her best-supporting-actress prize from the New York Film Critics Circle around the halfway point of the N.Y.F.C.C. gala, after a tribute from Sony Pictures Classics co-president Michael Barker to the recently deceased Lincoln Plaza Cinemas owner Dan Talbot, and before Jane Pauley handed the best-picture prize to Greta Gerwig for Lady Bird. 
 
 O.K., this is not a grapefruit. This is a microphone; I’m much better with that. The Tiffany special [a special cocktail]—I wanna call it the Tiffanicity-tini. It’s delicious. I’ve had two, and I do feel like magic. 
 
 First, I want to look at the award and make sure they spelled my name right—because I remember when I ran track, they spelled my name wrong. It’s right. Somebody did this with calligraphy and everything. [To a friend at her table] Remember when we took calligraphy class? I have my best friend with me, and my other best friend, and my other best friend. 
 
 O.K. First, I want to thank God, because without God, my mama and daddy wouldn’t have put their two uglies together and they wouldn’t have made me. That was all God right there. He put two crazy people together to make this one awesome, crazy person. So I super-thank God. I want—[looking at the statue above the stage, a many-armed goddess holding several different items] I’ve been staring all night. Y’all see this? 
 
 All night I’ve been staring at this bitch. I’m trying to figure out “Who is this bitch?” Her name is Quan Yin. Quan Yin is a goddess in Hinduism. I’m here to teach you. And when I look at her, I feel like I’m looking at myself. Like she taking a nap, but she doing a lot of stuff all at the same time. That’s what my life has been like the last year. I’m asleep, but I’m woke. I’ve never been more tired in my whole entire existence, and I feel like I do all these things. 
 
 Like, she got some weed or some drink in both hands; she holding on to the rings, you know, because she trying to get a ring on it. She working out—she got dumbbells. She holding feathers because she take care of animals and creatures. She got an eraser to erase the bullshit. She holding on to some seeds or a pinecone, which means she’s trying to produce and create, and that’s exactly what I’m trying to do. I’m not trying to get pregnant yet, Michael, but I’m working on it. B. Jordan. 
 
 You see these plates that she got? I don’t know if these are plates or if this is distributing medication, because I worked in a pharmacy for two days. This brings us to feed people. I’m going to go with that’s a plate to feed people, because she feeds people with spiritual knowledge. That’s where I’m going because sometimes I do that too. 
 
 She got the sun in her hand because she light this motherfucker up. That’s me too! Then I think she got a cracker because she get hungry. And then she’s got another little thing in her hand . . . [speaking up to the lights] Can y’all light this? Y’all have it lit up all night—I get up here and you turn it off. I seen the bitch blink twice. It scared the fuck out of me. Did y’all see her blinking? I was like, “I know I didn’t take my drugs today.” 
 
 She’s got a key over here that looks like a heart, and I'm always holding my heart. For me, in this business—I’ve been doing stand-up comedy since I was 15. I’m 21 for the 17th year now. And I’ve been in a lot of different projects. 
 
 To get in Girls Trip was absolutely amazing. First off, I didn’t even know the movie was happening. I did a movie with Jordan Peele called Keanu, and we shot it in New Orleans, where I was a gangster chick. I was a different type of person, but the same. And I hung out with the crew. I always feel like when I work with people, I work with everybody—from the person that’s working the camera to the person that’s running the water to the person that’s putting the clothes on me, the person that’s combing my hair, my makeup, the person that’s like, “You gotta sign these papers.” I try to hang out with everybody. Because all of y’all make my money come through. 
 
 So now that I get to meet the critics, first off, thank you, guys. I don’t even—I don’t read reviews. I don’t. The most reviews you’ll see me read is something that either my publicist sends me and says, “Read this,” and I’m like, “You read it,” because if it hurt my feelings I’m going to cuss their ass out in my soul, and then I’m going to pray for them, and I’ll laugh. Because I’m super-sensitive. I don’t mean to be so sensitive, but that’s just who I am. And I'm not afraid to admit it. 
 
 And I know I’m going to do a lot of different things in this business. I’m going to be around here a long time. I’m going to be an old lady. I know some people in here are going to talk shit about me. It’s O.K. You know why it’s O.K.? Because you care enough to say something. If you didn’t say nothing, then you didn’t care. 
 
 So if you said something, thank you. I don’t care if it’s positive or negative. I appreciate you; I’m glad you see me. Because it’s been so many years nobody saw me. 
 
 When you’re a little kid going through the [foster-care] system, you wonder, “Does anybody even know I’m alive?” To be able to be this example to so many youth—there’s so many people like me that you guys have no clue about. But they coming. Because I kicked the fucking door open. 
 
 It’s going to be a lot of people that say what they think. It’s going to be a lot of people where [unintelligible] is normal, because they’re not holding back their truth. Stop holding your truth; speak your truth. Be yourself. It’s the healthiest way to be. Be who you are. Speak who you are. If don’t nobody like you, fuck it; there’s 10 other people that do. There’s somebody like you, and they need to hear you. 
 
 So, I’m always going to be me. I'm never going to be perfect, I’m always going to say what I think, and I might be messed up for it, but I don’t care. 
 
 And I want to give a special shout-out to all the people that supported me throughout all these years. My best friend, Selena. I’ve known you since we were 12 years old. I walked up to you like, “You’re going to be my friend” and you was like “What?” And you’re still my friend. 
 
 And she never tried to kick me to the curb, and that means she laughed at all my stupid jokes. Told me when I was doing too much, told me when I was doing just enough, and told me when to do more, and I appreciate you for that. 
 
 I want to say thank you to Malcolm Lee. You hired me for this job. I was like “For real? I’m going to get to do the grapefruit? Because I practiced that for years.” That’s how I got my first Corvette. So I knew if they hired me, I would do a good job, at least in that scene if nothing else. 
 
 And on the second day, he led me—he said, “O.K., you do the scene the way it’s supposed to be done, and then do what you want.” Then I did what I wanted, and I said a lot of things, and some things didn’t make it to the movie. And that hurt my feelings. And a lot of things made it to the movie that I didn’t think would ever make it to the movie. But can I share one scene with y’all that I really wanted to make it to the movie, but Universal said that they was afraid that women would actually do this shit? So they didn’t put it in there, because they didn’t want to get sued. Can I share that with y’all? 
 
 And I’m going to put this in my special, and I don’t care if somebody try to sue me, because they shouldn’t have been a cheating-ass mother. 
 
 So, there’s a scene where I tell Regina [Hall] all the things I would do for her, that I got her back, no matter what. I’m like, no matter what, I got your back. I’m talking Timberland boots, hot bricks—I don’t care. We’re going to give him some Ambien, night night. And then, when he sleep, we’re going to burn your name in his dick. And then we’re going to put mud and salt on it so it can keloid over, and then it will be ribbed for your pleasure. And then when he wake up, we’ll look him dead in his eyes, and we’ll tell him right to his face to keep your name out these bitches’ mouths. 
 
 Now, they took it out of the movie. But I like to tell everybody about it, because these are the things I think about at night. Don’t hurt my feelings, Michael B. Jordan. I’m just putting in my card, player. I’ll check your credit score, though, to make sure you qualify. 
 
 Moving on to thank-yous . . . I want to thank the loyalty of James Lopez, because I’ve seen you at comedy shows, and you say hi to me and don’t say nothing else. And then to be in this movie and see you, and you telling me about how you saw me at the comedy clubs all these years and didn’t never get me a job until now—that’s cool. It’s supposed to be now; it’s supposed to be now; it’s supposed to be now. 
 
 All these crew members from Keanu: let me tell y’all, that’s how I found out about the movie. So I did Keanu, and all the crew members—it was like eight of them—sent me the script for Girls Trip. We shot that in New Orleans. They sent me the script, and they say, “Girl, this is you. This is you last summer. You need to be in this movie. You need to audition for it.” 
 
 I tried to get an audition, and my agent is like, “Oh, they only want to see names.” And I said, “You tell them I’ve had a name since 1979, and it’s Tiffany motherfucking Haddish. You get me in there.” And they finally got me in there, and I did a pre-read, and another read, and another read—and finally I got to do the Skype audition for Malcolm, which I thought was crazy as hell because I’m used to Skype sex. So I didn’t know . . . it worked out good. I didn’t take my shirt off. Nothing inappropriate happened, so good job. That was a great joke; that was the truth. 
 
 Anyway, moving on. So thank you, James Lopez, for putting my name in the hat. I want to say thank you to my makeup artist, Dionne Wynn, who I’ve known for a long time and I’ve been trying to work with forever, and when I saw her in the trailer of Girls Trip, I knew that it was meant for us to be together, and I’ve been taking her with me everywhere I go. I’ve been doing a lot of projects since Girls Trip, and girl, you’re going to be doing makeup until your fingers get arthritis. Arthritic—you know what I'm saying. They’re crippled up. 
 
 I’ll keep you with me, because she makes me feel pretty. I think it’s about how you feel. I think this whole business is about how you feel, and what feeling you put out into the world, and how you make other people feel. When you feel good about what you’re doing, in my mind, you make other people feel good. I’m going to tell you—on set, working, with Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith, Regina Hall, and them allowing me to be myself, and they wasn’t no haters. They was like, “Keep going.” Queen Latifah would egg me on into the most craziest stuff, and I was like, “She’s got to be my friend in real life, because we’ll never go to jail.” And she is my friend in real life, and we haven’t been to jail yet. 
 
 I’m super-grateful and thankful. I’m thankful for you critics; I'm learning a lot about you guys. The only critics I ever known before this was Siskel and Ebert, and then when they passed, I was like, “Oh, well.” I ain’t going to lie to you: all my stuff comes from TV. Who’s the new movie-critic TV show? Is there one? Get it together, y’all. Y’all should have a TV show so we know who you are. 
 
 I don’t read reviews. Like I said, I’m sensitive. I hope that you guys get a better feel for who I am now. I’m wearing a pretty dress. I don’t know if my coochie is showing right now or not. If it is, it’s cool, because I'm wearing God’s panties and my panties on top of them. Some of y’all don't get that joke, but you will later. I’ve got that throwback. 
 
 At the end of the day, I’m real happy to be here—that was too much? O.K., I don’t care. I’m a comedian. I’m going to say what I think. I love you too! 
 
 I hope everybody who’s in here has the most awesome 2018. I hope that your cycles come on time. If you don’t want it to come, I hope it don’t come. I hope every man in here is super-happy and super-rich, and if you’re not happy, change your thought patterns and start having happy thoughts. Because it’s your fault you’re not happy. Nobody’s in control of your emotions but you. 
 
 That’s what I learned from therapy. Years of therapy. You’re the only one that’s in control of your emotions; you’re the only one that’s inside of you at all times. So control you however you want to. If you’re not happy, that’s your fault. Change your mind, dammit. 
 
 That’s what I did. I just got me a better house in South Central L.A. No roaches, no rats. Cherry hardwood floors. That’s because my check came in. Does this come with a check? I’m going to show it to my grandma, and she’s going to be like, “Somebody write nice in calligraphy?” 
 
 I’m just reading what’s up here right now. I want to say thank you to Eric. Eric, I don’t know if you had anything to do with me getting this award. I don’t know how you feel about me standing here talking this long, and I don’t care. But I thank you. You were the first person to greet me when I walked into the room, and you smiled and looked me dead in my eyes and shook my hand. You weren’t afraid to talk to me. 
 
 The thing I hate the most is people that come up to me, and I can smell fear on them. It makes me want to fuck them up. I hate fear. I know fear is fuel for other things; fear will help you move toward something great. But don’t be trying to put that shit on me. Come up to me happy; come up to me with a smile; find your joyful self if you’re talking to me. If you coming up to me scared, it’s going to make me talk to you crazy. 
 
 Think of me as a wild dog, because I’m confident. I smile. Come up confident, and look me dead in my eyes, I’m going to be cool with you. Come up scared and act like a bitch, it’s how you’re going to get treated. 
 
 That might be too much information, but I don’t care. If this was a black party, everybody would be laughing. I’m teaching ‘all something today. 
 
 My name is Tiffany Haddish. I want to give it up to this lady back here. And to God, my grandma, my mama, my daddy, and everybody who taught me not to be afraid. 
 
 Get Vanity Fair’s HWD Newsletter Sign up for essential industry and award news from Hollywood. E-mail Address Subscribe ||||| Celebs Swearing, Keaton's singing, a dig at Taylor Swift: Golden Globe burning questions answered Jan. 13, 2014 at 2:37 PM ET 
 
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 A three-hour awards show can't possibly slip by without a few head-scratchers. From inside jokes to out-and-out bizarre moments, here are your burning questions about Sunday's Golden Globes explained — so far as we know. 
 
 Getty Images, AP 
 
 Were some of the winners seemingly seated in San Diego? 
 
 It sure seemed like some of Sunday night's victors had to hop a Greyhound bus to make it to the stage. The ballroom at the Beverly Hilton hotel is decent-sized, but not huge. Still, some of the winners were seated way in the back, some were blocked by closely-pressed-together tables, and still others stopped to chat with friends along the way, making their paths about as straightforward as Little Billy's dotted-line routes in the "Family Circus" comic strip. Robin Wright had to break into a jog to make it to the stage in time to claim her best actress prize for "House of Cards," while others, including original score winner Alex Ebert (also noted for his man bun — mun?) truly seemed stunned and in no real hurry to make the hike. Viewers noticed. 
 
 
 
 
 
 Were the speeches a little unprepared? 
 
 Winner after winner claimed they hadn't expected to hear their name, and seemed taken aback by finding themselves in front of a microphone. It didn't take long for the random babble to start — early winner Jacqueline Bisset's speech included numerous sighs, lip-smacks, a claim that she needed to see "Dancing on the Edge" co-star Chiwetel Ejiofor for inspiration, a swear word that wasn't quite bleeped, and a mention of her mother telling her "go to hell and don't come back." Bisset told Variety she was confused because she was expecting her category to come much later in the show. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Why was Jim Carrey talking about Shia LaBeouf? 
 
 When Carrey took the stage as a presenter, he quipped, “Dying is easy; comedy is hard. I believe it was Shia LaBeouf who said that. So young, so wise.” It might have seemed an odd reference, as the “Transformers” actor was nowhere to be seen at the show. The quote is generally attributed to 18th century actor Edmund King — so the mention is a backhanded way of referring to recent accusations that LaBeouf ripped off a graphic novel’s story to make a short film, and his Tweeted apologies were also reportedly plagiarized. On Jan. 10, the actor announced on Twitter he was “retiring from all public life.” But after Carrey's mention, LaBeouf tweeted a slam at Carrey's parenting, and later deleted the remark and apologized. 
 
 
 
 
 
 What’s with all the potty-mouth celebs? 
 
 “The Wolf of Wall Street” may have broken a record for 506 uses of the f-word, but it’s doubtful that Golden Globe producers meant to create an homage by letting a few naughty words drop through. Early on during Jacqueline Bisset’s speech, censors hit the bleep button, but not quite in time. Aaron Paul hollered out a good “hey b----!” at one point, and during the tribute to Woody Allen, Diane Keaton's taking of the Lord's name in vain also got a healthy bleep. Still, it’s hardly unprecedented to have a somewhat vulgar Golden Globes: In 2012, Meryl Streep dropped her own s-bomb while accepting her prize for “The Iron Lady.” 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Diane Keaton sings 
 
 Toward the end of her Allen tribute, Keaton sang a few verses of a song that had a rather childlike tone. "Make new friends, but keep the old/ One is silver, and the other's gold," however, is familiar to anyone who ever joined the Girl Scouts, so brush up for Keaton's next awards appearance by checking out the lyrics here. Apparently she was singing it to Allen, as a reminder that they'd eternally be friends. The Girl Scouts were pretty pleased. 
 
 
 
 Did Tina Fey get a dig in at Taylor Swift? 
 
 After show host Amy Poehler won her Golden Globe for "Parks and Recreation," co-host and pal Tina Fey joked, "I love you, and there's a special place in hell for you!" Some viewers thought the "special place in hell" mention was a dig at country singer Taylor Swift, who was in attendance. Last year, Fey and Poehler joked that Swift should "stay away from Michael J. Fox's son," a light joke based on Swift's frequent musical skewering of her exes. Swift later told Vanity Fair that there was "a special place in hell" for women who didn't help other women, and Fey's Sunday night mention sure seemed like a reference to that. 
 
 
 
 Not everyone was worried about being caught in the crosshairs of the funny hosts. “Girls” star Lena Dunham told TODAY in the ballroom Sunday night that she wouldn’t have minded being skewered by the hosts, saying “They can do whatever they want to us because they are geniuses,” she said. 
 
 
 
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– There was no shortage of memorable moments at the 74th annual Golden Globes, from Ryan Gosling thanking his partner, Eva Mendes, for handling their family life at home while he was filming his movie La La Land, to Meryl Streep revealing how one recent moment (a moment related to President-elect Donald Trump) "kind of broke my heart." Some other notable quotes and happenings at the Globes: Streep wasn't the only one to call attention to No. 45. Hugh Laurie also jumped on the anti-Trump allusion train, hinting that this may be the last Golden Globes show because of the new administration's distrust of celebrities and noting he was accepting his best supporting actor award for The Night Manager "on behalf of psychopathic billionaires everywhere," the Hill reports. Fallon himself noted, per Mediaite, that "many people [had been] wondering what it would be like if King Joffrey [from Game of Thrones] had lived. Well, in 12 days we're gonna find out." He also announced the night's votes had been tabulated by the "accounting firm of Ernst, Young, and Putin" and told the crowd that the Globes are "one of the few places left where America still honors the popular vote," People reports. The night's host couldn't resist a callback to the show's opening teleprompter issues, incorporating the ongoing Mariah Carey New Year's Eve saga to make his point. "I just got off the phone with Mariah Carey and she thinks that Dick Clark Productions sabotaged my monologue," he said, per Us Weekly. The New York Daily News recaps some of Fallon's other zingers. Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn appeared as the "Golden Globes comedy duo we never knew we needed," per E! Online, to present the award for Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical, or Comedy. Hawn turned on the loopiness while Schumer played the straight one, with Goldie using the word "mystical" instead of "musical" and announcing the "nominees of the five most tainted men" instead of the five most "talented" ones. "Kurt, do you have her glasses?" Schumer asked Hawn's partner, Kurt Russell, who was sitting in the audience. Two other comedians also made an impact at the awards show, but their turn was more of the "hilariously dark" version, per People. Steve Carell and Kristen Wiig presented the award for best animated feature, but not before they revealed the first animated movies they had seen as kids. "As we were leaving the theater, there standing in the lobby was my mom—and that was the moment that she told my dad that she wanted a divorce," Carell said of his (supposed) Fantasia experience. "March 14, 1981: It was the same day we had to put our dogs down," Wiig recalled of her first alleged viewing of Bambi. Billboard, Entertainment Weekly, and Today.com offer their own takes on the best and worst moments of the show. (There was also a pretty hot kiss between Ryan Reynolds and Andrew Garfield.)