However, there remained a missing link in my own story. While my response to those in pain changed significantly, internally I felt blocked off from them because I was having a difficult time relating to the feelings they were experiencing. I knew I had things in my life that should have made my angry and sad and hurt and traumatized… But I had never felt the emotion, and started to realize that wasn’t healthy. For about 27 years of my life I didn’t allow myself to feel the weight of those difficult emotions. I had it so engrained in my mind since childhood that those not-so-lovely emotions were bad, and therefore best kept hidden inside to never be seen by others. I didn’t know what it looked like to express those emotions and not feel guilty about it.
I didn’t know what it looked like to be vulnerable and not be afraid of being judged. I didn’t know what it looked like to be honest and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be angry and not be afraid of being misunderstood. I didn’t know what it looked like to be sad and not be afraid of being alone. I didn’t know what it looked like to be hurt and not be afraid of being
abandoned. I didn’t know what it looked like to be scared and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be ashamed and not be afraid of being judged. I didn’t know what it looked like to be embarrassed and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be humble and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be grateful and not be
 I didn’t know what it looked like to be vulnerable and not be afraid of being judged. I didn’t know what it looked like to be honest and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be angry and not be afraid of being misunderstood. I didn’t know what it looked like to be sad and not be afraid of being alone. I didn’t know what it looked like to be hurt and not be afraid of being
 abandoned. I didn’t know what it looked like to be scared and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be ashamed and not be afraid of being judged. I didn’t know what it looked like to be embarrassed and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be humble and not be afraid of being rejected. I didn’t know what it looked like to be grateful and not be