​welcome to my house there’s not any chairs here
[Verse 1]
Hear a knock on my door and I say “Oh no”
If they want to sit down, don’t know where they’ll go
My house is fully furnished except the chairs
The only thing they can sit on is maybe the stairs

[Pre-Chorus]
And they come in my house
And say they want to sit down
And I give them a frown
And I point to the ground, hey

[Chorus]
Welcome to my house
There’s not any chairs here
Please don’t ask to sit down
‘Cause we don’t have any chairs in here
No, I’m not moving
I just lost all my chairs
I don’t know where they went to
Maybe someone stole all of my chairs
Hey, hey!
Welcome to my house
Oh boy
Just don’t try to sit down
[Verse 2]
Things where going okay until half past three
Grandma came to my house and she has bad knees
She can’t stand very long cause her knees are bad
I told her I don’t have any chairs and she got real mad

[Pre-Chorus]
Then she starts getting loud
Swear words come from her mouth
Then her knees just give out
And she falls to the ground, hey

[Chorus]
Welcome to my house
We still don’t have chairs here
Grandma broke her hip too
Because of the deficit of chairs
Just bring your own chair
If you want to sit here
Or just bring a stool
If you want to sit down in my house
Yeah, okay
Welcome to my house
You should really expect to not sit down here in the foreseeable future

[Bridge]
Okay technically I lied to you before
We actually have one chair
But I’m pretty sure it’s haunted
So I wouldn’t sit there
My uncle died one time when he sat in that chair
Now his ghost will haunt you
And you’ll have bad luck if you sit in it
Grandma’s angry now because she doesn’t believe in ghosts
She said she wouldn’t have broken her hip if she knew there was a chair
I was like, “Grandma, trust me, a broken hip is way better than having a curse”
[Chorus]
Welcome to my house
There’s not any chairs here
Now my grandma’s crying
Things are getting awkward in my house
But it’s not my fault
Don’t know what Grandma was thinking
She knows I don’t have chairs
Welcome to my house
There’s not any chairs here