Ethel Merman
I'm going to grow up to be just like Ethel Merman
I'm already warbling, so I think I fit her pretty well
Ethel was not Vegas
Ethel's death has come too soon
And I've got suspicious feelings now that Ethel's gone

I'm going to grow up tp be just like Johnny Franklin
I'm already balding, so I think I fit him pretty well
And it's not that I don't like people
Surely you know that I like you
It's just that I've got hateful feelings towards the Beatles' song