You Never Phone Live
Hey! Welcome to the stage Martha Wainwright!

You never phone, you never write
Hey, I've stopped hoping that you might
You're tryin' to hurt my feelings, right?
You never phone and you never write

You never write, you never phone
I'm sorry I gotta bitch and moan
I'm sorry I gotta beat this bone
You never write, you never phone

Sometimes I wonder what you must think of me
My address and phone number must be misty in your memory

This year my birthday came and went
No call was made, no card was sent
But I got the snub you must've meant
This year my birthday came and went

This year my birthday went and came
Last year what happened was the same
And your excuses sure are lame
This year my birthday went and came
Chick-a-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow
Chick-a-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow
Chick-chick-chick-chicky-chicky-chicky-chick-a-wow-wow-wow-wow-that's in Peter Frampton time
Chick-a-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow

Sometimes I wonder what you must think of me
Then I remember it's you that think of exclusively

But I'm not gonna bow and scrape
In every bunch there's one bad grape
I'm a little bit bent out of shape
But I'm not gonna bow and scrape

I won't scrape or bow
Genuflect, beg, or cow tow
Just singin' this song just fine, for now
Now I'm not scrape
Chick-a-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow