State of Mind
People really think they know me
But they don't know the half of it
I’m just pissed that I'm lonely
When am I gonna have justice?
Man, I don't need no trophy
I just need love in abundance
I’m just sittin' here hopin'
That my stomach doesn't plummet
The sheer cold that always clutches
The fear that opens all disruptions
Will there be blood on the floor?
My emotions on a budget
I'm fightin' these wars
That I know I can never win
But I fight them, of course
'Cause if I stop, I'm frozen
Oh, my god, I’m hopeless
I know I’m flawed, I've noticed
Despite all my devotion...
I just want y’all to know this
This ain't fake or showbiz
I'm not okay, I'm broken
This amount of pain, it’s growin'
I didn't suffer a loss
I have food and a roof
But I feel so lost
So contrived and used
I don't wanna live my life
If I don't get to live my life
Only have one anyway
So do you want me to die tonight?
In a way, already died inside
End of the maze, is there light in sight?
I put pen to the page just to fly my kite
'Til the end of my days, will I find my rhymes?
I guess time will tell
Whether I go to heaven or hell
Just know why I'm better myself
Just know I try to better myself