Bed Bugs
They live in your mattress, in your pillow and on your sheets
When you're sound asleep, they come out to eat
And they suck your blood, it's such a tasty treat

If you find red dots all around your pillowcase
And little tiny marks on your stomach, your legs and face
It's safe to say you've got bed bugs in your place

They cannot be stopped if they move into your room
You can't just sweep them away with a dustpan and a broom
If you've got the bed bugs, then you're pretty much doomed

Go ahead and try to call the exterminator
He'll just say, "Too bad for you, bye-bye, see you later"
You can never bring home your girlfriend no matter how long you date her

If getting rid of the bed bugs is what you desire
Leave all your things inside and then set your house on fire
And then rejoice and sing hallelujah with the choir