feat_summary_path: finished_summaries/shmoop/Twelfth Night, or What You Will/section_17_part_0.txt
feat_book_id: Twelfth Night, or What You Will.act 5.scene 1
feat_summary_id: act 5, scene 1
feat_summary: {"name": "Act 5, Scene 1", "url": "https://web.archive.org/web/20210415161814/https://www.shmoop.com/study-guides/literature/twelfth-night/summary/act-5-scene-1", "summary": "In front of Olivia's house, Fabian and Feste argue about a letter that Feste won't show Fabian. Duke Orsino, \"Cesario,\" Curio, and some Lords show up looking for Olivia. Feste makes some clever comments and jokes and Orsino gives him some money for being so entertaining. Feste then convinces Orsino to give him some more gold. Orsino tells Feste to fetch Olivia and the clown runs off. Just then, Antonio and the cops happen to walk by and Orsino recognizes Antonio as a sea captain that once caused him and his fleet of ships a lot of grief. \"Cesario\" says Antonio's the guy who stood up for \"him\" when Aguecheek and Toby tried to beat \"him\" up, but Orsino doesn't care. He can't believe Antonio has the nerve to show his face in Illyria when he's a wanted man. Antonio says he's not a pirate, even though he's Orsino's enemy. Then he points at \"Cesario\" and whines about the way Sebastian treated him. Antonio says that, even though he saved Sebastian's life, has been a loving and devoted companion, and has followed Sebastian to Illyria, where he saved his life again, Sebastian has betrayed by pretending not to know him and by refusing to give him back the money he needs to buy his way out of jail. \"Cesario\" is dumbfounded. Orsino says Antonio's story isn't possible because \"Cesario\" has been in Illyria for three months, not one day, so Antonio must be lying. Olivia and her attendants come outside and Duke Orsino tries to lay some smooth moves on her, but Olivia's not having any of it. She yells at \"Cesario\" for neglecting her so soon after their marriage. Orsino tells \"Cesario\" to come with him, but Olivia says, \"Husband, stay.\" Husband? That gets everyone's attention. When Orsino hears that his trusty page \"Cesario\" married the woman of his dreams, he's furious. \"Cesario\" tries to protest, which angers Olivia. Then the priest enters and says that yep, he just married Olivia to \"Cesario.\" Orsino calls \"Cesario\" a conniving little liar and says he never wants to see \"him\" again. \"Cesario\" tries to protest again, but it's tough to get anyone to believe you when it's your word against a priest's. To make matters worse, Aguecheek runs out and says that \"Cesario\" just beat him up. He beat up Toby, too. \"Cesario\" denies everything, but Toby runs out and corroborates Aguecheek's story. Both men are bleeding and, when Toby asks if anyone has seen the local doctor, Feste informs him that the doctor has been drunk since eight o'clock in the morning - he's not going to come. This infuriates Toby, who announces that he hates all drunks. Olivia tells Toby get out and says that Sir Andrew needs to get to bed and be looked after. Andrew says he'll leave with Toby since they're in this together, but Toby insults him, calling him a coward and an idiot. Finally, Sebastian saunters in and says he's sorry to Olivia for beating up her uncle Toby. Everyone is shocked and amazed that there seems to be two \"Cesario's\" standing on stage. Sebastian recognizes Antonio and is overjoyed to see his bosom friend. Antonio is amazed. He asks Sebastian if he's split himself in two. Sebastian notices \"Cesario\" standing nearby and says he can't believe there's a guy out there who looks just like him. He wants to know who \"Cesario's\" parents are and where \"Cesario\" comes from. Instead of coming out and saying, \"Hey, I'm Viola, your sister,\" Viola is cryptic and says her father's name is Sebastian. That's her brother's name too, but he's drowned and dead. Sebastian still hasn't figured it out. He says that if \"Cesario\" were a woman, he would look just like his long lost sister Viola, who is dead. Viola then says her father had a mole on his face and Sebastian says gee, my dad had a mole on his face, too. When Viola announces that her dad died on her thirteenth birthday, Sebastian finally understands that \"Cesario\" is in fact his sister, Viola. Finally, Viola says what she should have said long before--\"I'm Viola dressed as a boy. I'd put my girl clothes back on now but I left them with the sea captain who fished me out of the ocean so I'll have to stay in these clothes.\" Sebastian looks at Olivia and says it's lucky for her that she married him instead of \"Cesario.\" Otherwise, she would have mistakenly married a woman when she thought she was marrying a man. As it is, she's now married to both a man and a woman . Orsino tells Olivia not to worry about this turn of events, because Sebastian comes from noble blood, which means Olivia hasn't just married a servant boy after all. And, Orsino says, he stands to gain here, too. Orsino turns to Viola, and calls her \"boy\" and reminds Viola of all the times \"Cesario\" told him \"he\" loved him. Viola confirms that yes, she is totally in love with Orsino. Orsino grabs her hand and says he wants to see her in her \"woman's weeds\" . Viola says she can't do it because the sea captain's got her clothes and Malvolio is holding the sea captain prisoner. Olivia says she'll take care of Malvolio. She calls for him and Feste gives her the letter Malvolio wrote while imprisoned in the dark room. Feste says Malvolio's possessed by the devil, but, when he reads the letter aloud to Olivia, Olivia knows something's up. Orsino turns to Viola and says she doesn't have to be his servant anymore--lucky girl, she gets to be his wife now. Fabian trots out Malvolio, who says that he did everything in Olivia's letter so she shouldn't have locked him in prison for doing what she asked. Olivia tells Malvolio that she didn't write the letter he's just shown her. That's Maria's handwriting. She tells Malvolio that when they figure out who's been pranking him, he can dole out the justice to make things right. Fabian jumps in and explains that he and Toby were just having a laugh. Toby convinced Maria to write the letter and married her as a reward for a job well done. Now, they should all just laugh at the outcome since Malvolio and the others all insulted each other equally. Malvolio doesn't see the humor in the situation. He runs off and swears he'll get revenge. Olivia says that poor Malvolio really got the raw end of the deal, but nobody really seems to care about Malvolio's feelings. Except that they need him to tell them where the Captain is so they can get Viola's clothes. Duke Orsino says that Viola will \"be\" Cesario until she changes out of her boy's clothes. But, when she puts her dress back on, she'll be his woman and they'll have the weddings. Everyone exits except the fool, who sings a silly--but kind of sad--song about growing up. It's about how things change as you get older and yet, life just keeps rolling on, with the rain coming every day. The last lines are happy though, as he say that the play is done and that the players will always strive to make their audience happy.", "analysis": ""}
text: ACT V. SCENE I.
  
  The Street before OLIVIA's House.
  
  [Enter CLOWN and FABIAN.]
  
  FABIAN.
  Now, as thou lovest me, let me see his letter.
  
  CLOWN.
  Good Master Fabian, grant me another request.
  
  FABIAN.
  Anything.
  
  CLOWN.
  Do not desire to see this letter.
  
  FABIAN.
  This is to give a dog; and in recompense desire my dog again.
  
  [Enter DUKE, VIOLA, and Attendants.]
  
  DUKE.
  Belong you to the Lady Olivia, friends?
  
  CLOWN.
  Ay, sir; we are some of her trappings.
  
  DUKE.
  I know thee well. How dost thou, my good fellow?
  
  CLOWN.
  Truly, sir, the better for my foes and the worse for my friends.
  
  DUKE.
  Just the contrary; the better for thy friends.
  
  CLOWN.
  No, sir, the worse.
  
  DUKE.
  How can that be?
  
  CLOWN.
  Marry, sir, they praise me and make an ass of me; now my
  foes tell me plainly I am an ass: so that by my foes, sir, I
  profit in the knowledge of myself, and by my friends I am abused:
  so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negatives make
  your two affirmatives, why then, the worse for my friends and
  the better for my foes.
  
  DUKE.
  Why, this is excellent.
  
  CLOWN.
  By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to be one of my
  friends.
  
  DUKE.
  Thou shalt not be the worse for me; there's gold.
  
  CLOWN.
  But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could
  make it another.
  
  DUKE.
  O, you give me ill counsel.
  
  CLOWN.
  Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let
  your flesh and blood obey it.
  
  DUKE.
  Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double-dealer: there's
  another.
  
  CLOWN.
  Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the old saying
  is, the third pays for all; the triplex, sir, is a good tripping
  measure; or the bells of Saint Bennet, sir, may put you in mind;
  one, two, three.
  
  DUKE.
  You can fool no more money out of me at this throw: if you
  will let your lady know I am here to speak with her, and bring
  her along with you, it may awake my bounty further.
  
  CLOWN.
  Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty till I come again. I go,
  sir; but I would not have you to think that my desire of having
  is the sin of covetousness: but, as you say, sir, let your bounty
  take a nap; I will awake it anon.
  
  [Exit CLOWN.]
  
  [Enter ANTONIO and Officers.]
  
  VIOLA.
  Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me.
  
  DUKE.
  That face of his I do remember well:
  Yet when I saw it last it was besmeared
  As black as Vulcan in the smoke of war:
  A bawbling vessel was he captain of,
  For shallow draught and bulk unprizable;
  With which such scathful grapple did he make
  With the most noble bottom of our fleet
  That very envy and the tongue of los
  Cried fame and honour on him.--What's the matter?
  
  FIRST OFFICER.
  Orsino, this is that Antonio
  That took the Phoenix and her fraught from Candy:
  And this is he that did the Tiger board
  When your young nephew Titus lost his leg:
  Here in the streets, desperate of shame and state,
  In private brabble did we apprehend him.
  
  VIOLA.
  He did me kindness, sir; drew on my side;
  But, in conclusion, put strange speech upon me.
  I know not what 'twas, but distraction.
  
  DUKE.
  Notable pirate! thou salt-water thief!
  What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies,
  Whom thou, in terms so bloody and so dear,
  Hast made thine enemies?
  
  ANTONIO.
  Orsino, noble sir,
  Be pleased that I shake off these names you give me:
  Antonio never yet was thief or pirate,
  Though, I confess, on base and ground enough,
  Orsino's enemy. A witchcraft drew me hither:
  That most ingrateful boy there, by your side
  From the rude sea's enraged and foamy mouth
  Did I redeem; a wreck past hope he was:
  His life I gave him, and did thereto add
  My love, without retention or restraint,
  All his in dedication: for his sake,
  Did I expose myself, pure for his love,
  Into the danger of this adverse town;
  Drew to defend him when he was beset:
  Where being apprehended, his false cunning,--
  Not meaning to partake with me in danger,--
  Taught him to face me out of his acquaintance,
  And grew a twenty-years-removed thing
  While one would wink; denied me mine own purse,
  Which I had recommended to his use
  Not half an hour before.
  
  VIOLA.
  How can this be?
  
  DUKE.
  When came he to this town?
  
  ANTONIO.
  To-day, my lord; and for three months before,--
  No interim, not a minute's vacancy,--
  Both day and night did we keep company.
  
  [Enter OLIVIA and Attendants.]
  
  DUKE.
  Here comes the countess; now heaven walks on earth.--
  But for thee, fellow, fellow, thy words are madness:
  Three months this youth hath tended upon me;
  But more of that anon.--Take him aside.
  
  OLIVIA.
  What would my lord, but that he may not have,
  Wherein Olivia may seem serviceable!--
  Cesario, you do not keep promise with me.
  
  VIOLA.
  Madam?
  
  DUKE.
  Gracious Olivia,--
  
  OLIVIA.
  What do you say, Cesario?--Good my lord,--
  
  VIOLA.
  My lord would speak, my duty hushes me.
  
  OLIVIA.
  If it be aught to the old tune, my lord,
  It is as fat and fulsome to mine ear
  As howling after music.
  
  DUKE.
  Still so cruel?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Still so constant, lord.
  
  DUKE.
  What! to perverseness? you uncivil lady,
  To whose ingrate and unauspicious altars
  My soul the faithfull'st offerings hath breathed out
  That e'er devotion tender'd! What shall I do?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Even what it please my lord, that shall become him.
  
  DUKE.
  Why should I not, had I the heart to do it.
  Like to the Egyptian thief, at point of death,
  Kill what I love; a savage jealousy
  That sometime savours nobly.--But hear me this:
  Since you to non-regardance cast my faith,
  And that I partly know the instrument
  That screws me from my true place in your favour,
  Live you the marble-breasted tyrant still;
  But this your minion, whom I know you love,
  And whom, by heaven I swear, I tender dearly,
  Him will I tear out of that cruel eye
  Where he sits crowned in his master's sprite.--
  Come, boy, with me; my thoughts are ripe in mischief:
  I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love,
  To spite a raven's heart within a dove.
  
  [Going.]
  
  VIOLA.
  And I, most jocund, apt, and willingly,
  To do you rest, a thousand deaths would die.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Where goes Cesario?
  
  VIOLA.
  After him I love
  More than I love these eyes, more than my life,
  More, by all mores, than e'er I shall love wife;
  If I do feign, you witnesses above
  Punish my life for tainting of my love!
  
  OLIVIA.
  Ah me, detested! how am I beguil'd!
  
  VIOLA.
  Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Hast thou forgot thyself? Is it so long?--
  Call forth the holy father.
  
  [Exit an ATTENDANT.]
  
  DUKE.
  [To Viola.] Come, away!
  
  OLIVIA.
  Whither, my lord? Cesario, husband, stay.
  
  DUKE.
  Husband?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Ay, husband, can he that deny?
  
  DUKE.
  Her husband, sirrah?
  
  VIOLA.
  No, my lord, not I.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Alas, it is the baseness of thy fear
  That makes thee strangle thy propriety:
  Fear not, Cesario, take thy fortunes up;
  Be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou art
  As great as that thou fear'st--O, welcome, father!
  
  [Re-enter Attendant and Priest.]
  
  Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence,
  Here to unfold,--though lately we intended
  To keep in darkness what occasion now
  Reveals before 'tis ripe,--what thou dost know
  Hath newly passed between this youth and me.
  
  PRIEST.
  A contract of eternal bond of love,
  Confirmed by mutual joinder of your hands,
  Attested by the holy close of lips,
  Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings;
  And all the ceremony of this compact
  Sealed in my function, by my testimony:
  Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my grave,
  I have travelled but two hours.
  
  DUKE.
  O thou dissembling cub! What wilt thou be,
  When time hath sowed a grizzle on thy case?
  Or will not else thy craft so quickly grow
  That thine own trip shall be thine overthrow?
  Farewell, and take her; but direct thy feet
  Where thou and I henceforth may never meet.
  
  VIOLA.
  My lord, I do protest,--
  
  OLIVIA.
  O, do not swear;
  Hold little faith, though thou has too much fear.
  
  [Enter SIR ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK, with his head broke.]
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  For the love of God, a surgeon; send one presently to Sir Toby.
  
  OLIVIA.
  What's the matter?
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  He has broke my head across, and has given Sir Toby a
  bloody coxcomb too: for the love of God, your help: I had rather
  than forty pound I were at home.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Who has done this, Sir Andrew?
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  The Count's gentleman, one Cesario: we took him for a
  coward, but he's the very devil incardinate.
  
  DUKE.
  My gentleman, Cesario?
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  Od's lifelings, here he is:--You broke my head for
  nothing; and that that I did, I was set on to do't by Sir Toby.
  
  
  VIOLA.
  Why do you speak to me? I never hurt you:
  You drew your sword upon me without cause;
  But I bespake you fair and hurt you not.
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  If a bloody coxcomb be a hurt, you have hurt me; I think
  you set nothing by a bloody coxcomb.
  
  [Enter SIR TOBY BELCH, drunk, led by the CLOWN.]
  
  Here comes Sir Toby halting; you shall hear more: but if he had
  not been in drink he would have tickled you othergates than he
  did.
  
  DUKE.
  How now, gentleman? how is't with you?
  
  SIR TOBY.
  That's all one; he has hurt me, and there's the end on't.--
  Sot, didst see Dick Surgeon, sot?
  
  CLOWN.
  O, he's drunk, Sir Toby, an hour agone; his eyes were set at
  eight i' the morning.
  
  SIR TOBY.
  Then he's a rogue. After a passy-measure, or a pavin, I hate a
  drunken rogue.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Away with him. Who hath made this havoc with them?
  
  SIR ANDREW.
  I'll help you, Sir Toby, because we'll be dressed together.
  
  SIR TOBY.
  Will you help an ass-head, and a coxcomb, and a knave? a
  thin-faced knave, a gull?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Get him to bed, and let his hurt be looked to.
  
  [Exeunt CLOWN, SIR TOBY, and SIR ANDREW.]
  
  [Enter SEBASTIAN.]
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kinsman;
  But, had it been the brother of my blood,
  I must have done no less, with wit and safety.
  You throw a strange regard upon me, and by that
  I do perceive it hath offended you;
  Pardon me, sweet one, even for the vows
  We made each other but so late ago.
  
  DUKE.
  One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons;
  A natural perspective, that is, and is not.
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  Antonio, O my dear Antonio!
  How have the hours rack'd and tortur'd me
  Since I have lost thee.
  
  ANTONIO.
  Sebastian are you?
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  Fear'st thou that, Antonio?
  
  ANTONIO.
  How have you made division of yourself?--
  An apple, cleft in two, is not more twin
  Than these two creatures. Which is Sebastian?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Most wonderful!
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  Do I stand there? I never had a brother:
  Nor can there be that deity in my nature
  Of here and everywhere. I had a sister
  Whom the blind waves and surges have devoured:--
  [To Viola.] Of charity, what kin are you to me?
  What countryman, what name, what parentage?
  
  VIOLA.
  Of Messaline: Sebastian was my father;
  Such a Sebastian was my brother too:
  So went he suited to his watery tomb:
  If spirits can assume both form and suit,
  You come to fright us.
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  A spirit I am indeed:
  But am in that dimension grossly clad,
  Which from the womb I did participate.
  Were you a woman, as the rest goes even,
  I should my tears let fall upon your cheek,
  And say--Thrice welcome, drowned Viola!
  
  VIOLA.
  My father had a mole upon his brow.
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  And so had mine.
  
  VIOLA.
  And died that day when Viola from her birth
  Had numbered thirteen years.
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  O, that record is lively in my soul!
  He finished, indeed, his mortal act
  That day that made my sister thirteen years.
  
  VIOLA.
  If nothing lets to make us happy both
  But this my masculine usurp'd attire,
  Do not embrace me till each circumstance
  Of place, time, fortune, do cohere, and jump
  That I am Viola: which to confirm,
  I'll bring you to a captain in this town,
  Where lie my maiden weeds; by whose gentle help
  I was preserv'd to serve this noble count;
  All the occurrence of my fortune since
  Hath been between this lady and this lord.
  
  SEBASTIAN.
  [To OLIVIA] So comes it, lady, you have been mistook:
  But nature to her bias drew in that.
  You would have been contracted to a maid;
  Nor are you therein, by my life, deceived;
  You are betroth'd both to a maid and man.
  
  DUKE.
  Be not amazed; right noble is his blood.--
  If this be so, as yet the glass seems true,
  I shall have share in this most happy wreck:
  [To VIOLA] Boy, thou hast said to me a thousand times,
  Thou never shouldst love woman like to me.
  
  VIOLA.
  And all those sayings will I over-swear;
  And all those swearings keep as true in soul
  As doth that orbed continent the fire
  That severs day from night.
  
  DUKE.
  Give me thy hand;
  And let me see thee in thy woman's weeds.
  
  VIOLA.
  The captain that did bring me first on shore
  Hath my maid's garments: he, upon some action,
  Is now in durance, at Malvolio's suit;
  A gentleman and follower of my lady's.
  
  OLIVIA.
  He shall enlarge him:--Fetch Malvolio hither:--
  And yet, alas, now I remember me,
  They say, poor gentleman, he's much distract.
  
  [Re-enter CLOWN, with a letter.]
  
  A most extracting frenzy of mine own
  From my remembrance clearly banished his.--
  How does he, sirrah?
  
  CLOWN.
  Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the stave's end as well
  as a man in his case may do: he has here writ a letter to you; I
  should have given it you to-day morning, but as a madman's
  epistles are no gospels, so it skills not much when they are
  delivered.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Open it, and read it.
  
  CLOWN.
  Look then to be well edified when the fool delivers the
  madman:--'By the Lord, madam,--'
  
  OLIVIA.
  How now! art thou mad?
  
  CLOWN.
  No, madam, I do but read madness: an your ladyship will have
  it as it ought to be, you must allow vox.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Pr'ythee, read i' thy right wits.
  
  CLOWN.
  So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is to read
  thus; therefore perpend, my princess, and give ear.
  
  OLIVIA.
  [To FABIAN] Read it you, sirrah.
  
  FABIAN.
  [Reads] 'By the Lord, madam, you wrong me, and the world
  shall know it: though you have put me into darkness and given
  your drunken cousin rule over me, yet have I the benefit of my
  senses as well as your ladyship. I have your own letter that
  induced me to the semblance I put on; with the which I doubt not
  but to do myself much right or you much shame. Think of me as you
  please. I leave my duty a little unthought of, and speak out of
  my injury.
         The madly-used Malvolio'
  
  OLIVIA.
  Did he write this?
  
  CLOWN.
  Ay, madam.
  
  DUKE.
  This savours not much of distraction.
  
  OLIVIA.
  See him delivered, Fabian: bring him hither.
  
  [Exit FABIAN.]
  
  My lord, so please you, these things further thought on,
  To think me as well a sister as a wife,
  One day shall crown the alliance on't, so please you,
  Here at my house, and at my proper cost.
  
  DUKE.
  Madam, I am most apt to embrace your offer.--
  [To VIOLA] Your master quits you; and, for your service done him,
  So much against the mettle of your sex,
  So far beneath your soft and tender breeding,
  And since you called me master for so long,
  Here is my hand; you shall from this time be
  You master's mistress.
  
  OLIVIA.
  A sister?--you are she.
  
  [Re-enter FABIAN with MALVOLIO.]
  
  DUKE.
  Is this the madman?
  
  OLIVIA.
  Ay, my lord, this same;
  How now, Malvolio?
  
  MALVOLIO.
  Madam, you have done me wrong,
  Notorious wrong.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Have I, Malvolio? no.
  
  MALVOLIO.
  Lady, you have. Pray you peruse that letter:
  You must not now deny it is your hand,
  Write from it, if you can, in hand or phrase;
  Or say 'tis not your seal, not your invention:
  You can say none of this. Well, grant it then,
  And tell me, in the modesty of honour,
  Why you have given me such clear lights of favour;
  Bade me come smiling and cross-garter'd to you;
  To put on yellow stockings, and to frown
  Upon Sir Toby and the lighter people:
  And, acting this in an obedient hope,
  Why have you suffer'd me to be imprison'd,
  Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest,
  And made the most notorious geck and gull
  That e'er invention played on? tell me why.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing,
  Though, I confess, much like the character:
  But out of question, 'tis Maria's hand.
  And now I do bethink me, it was she
  First told me thou wast mad; then cam'st in smiling,
  And in such forms which here were presuppos'd
  Upon thee in the letter. Pr'ythee, be content:
  This practice hath most shrewdly pass'd upon thee:
  But, when we know the grounds and authors of it,
  Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge
  Of thine own cause.
  
  FABIAN.
  Good madam, hear me speak;
  And let no quarrel, nor no brawl to come,
  Taint the condition of this present hour,
  Which I have wonder'd at. In hope it shall not,
  Most freely I confess, myself and Toby
  Set this device against Malvolio here,
  Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts
  We had conceiv'd against him. Maria writ
  The letter, at Sir Toby's great importance;
  In recompense whereof he hath married her.
  How with a sportful malice it was follow'd
  May rather pluck on laughter than revenge,
  If that the injuries be justly weigh'd
  That have on both sides past.
  
  OLIVIA.
  Alas, poor fool! how have they baffled thee!
  
  CLOWN.
  Why, 'some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some
  have greatness thrown upon them.' I was one, sir, in this
  interlude;:--one Sir Topas, sir; but that's all one:--'By the
  Lord, fool, I am not mad;'--But do you remember? 'Madam, why
  laugh you at such a barren rascal? An you smile not, he's
  gagged'? And thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.
  
  MALVOLIO.
  I'll be revenged on the whole pack of you.
  
  [Exit.]
  
  OLIVIA.
  He hath been most notoriously abus'd.
  
  DUKE.
  Pursue him, and entreat him to a peace:--
  He hath not told us of the captain yet;
  When that is known, and golden time convents,
  A solemn combination shall be made
  Of our dear souls.--Meantime, sweet sister,
  We will not part from hence.--Cesario, come:
  For so you shall be while you are a man;
  But, when in other habits you are seen,
  Orsino's mistress, and his fancy's queen.
  
  [Exeunt.]
  
  CLOWN.
        Song.
     When that I was and a little tiny boy,
       With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
     A foolish thing was but a toy,
       For the rain it raineth every day.
  
     But when I came to man's estate,
       With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
     'Gainst knave and thief men shut their gate,
       For the rain it raineth every day.
  
     But when I came, alas! to wive,
       With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
     By swaggering could I never thrive,
       For the rain it raineth every day.
  
     But when I came unto my bed,
       With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
     With toss-pots still had drunken head,
       For the rain it raineth every day.
  
     A great while ago the world begun,
       With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
     But that's all one, our play is done,
       And we'll strive to please you every day.
  
  [Exit.]
  
  
  
  
  
  
feat_summary_name: Act 5, Scene 1
target: In front of Olivia's house, Fabian and Feste argue about a letter that Feste won't show Fabian. Duke Orsino, "Cesario," Curio, and some Lords show up looking for Olivia. Feste makes some clever comments and jokes and Orsino gives him some money for being so entertaining. Feste then convinces Orsino to give him some more gold. Orsino tells Feste to fetch Olivia and the clown runs off. Just then, Antonio and the cops happen to walk by and Orsino recognizes Antonio as a sea captain that once caused him and his fleet of ships a lot of grief. "Cesario" says Antonio's the guy who stood up for "him" when Aguecheek and Toby tried to beat "him" up, but Orsino doesn't care. He can't believe Antonio has the nerve to show his face in Illyria when he's a wanted man. Antonio says he's not a pirate, even though he's Orsino's enemy. Then he points at "Cesario" and whines about the way Sebastian treated him. Antonio says that, even though he saved Sebastian's life, has been a loving and devoted companion, and has followed Sebastian to Illyria, where he saved his life again, Sebastian has betrayed by pretending not to know him and by refusing to give him back the money he needs to buy his way out of jail. "Cesario" is dumbfounded. Orsino says Antonio's story isn't possible because "Cesario" has been in Illyria for three months, not one day, so Antonio must be lying. Olivia and her attendants come outside and Duke Orsino tries to lay some smooth moves on her, but Olivia's not having any of it. She yells at "Cesario" for neglecting her so soon after their marriage. Orsino tells "Cesario" to come with him, but Olivia says, "Husband, stay." Husband? That gets everyone's attention. When Orsino hears that his trusty page "Cesario" married the woman of his dreams, he's furious. "Cesario" tries to protest, which angers Olivia. Then the priest enters and says that yep, he just married Olivia to "Cesario." Orsino calls "Cesario" a conniving little liar and says he never wants to see "him" again. "Cesario" tries to protest again, but it's tough to get anyone to believe you when it's your word against a priest's. To make matters worse, Aguecheek runs out and says that "Cesario" just beat him up. He beat up Toby, too. "Cesario" denies everything, but Toby runs out and corroborates Aguecheek's story. Both men are bleeding and, when Toby asks if anyone has seen the local doctor, Feste informs him that the doctor has been drunk since eight o'clock in the morning - he's not going to come. This infuriates Toby, who announces that he hates all drunks. Olivia tells Toby get out and says that Sir Andrew needs to get to bed and be looked after. Andrew says he'll leave with Toby since they're in this together, but Toby insults him, calling him a coward and an idiot. Finally, Sebastian saunters in and says he's sorry to Olivia for beating up her uncle Toby. Everyone is shocked and amazed that there seems to be two "Cesario's" standing on stage. Sebastian recognizes Antonio and is overjoyed to see his bosom friend. Antonio is amazed. He asks Sebastian if he's split himself in two. Sebastian notices "Cesario" standing nearby and says he can't believe there's a guy out there who looks just like him. He wants to know who "Cesario's" parents are and where "Cesario" comes from. Instead of coming out and saying, "Hey, I'm Viola, your sister," Viola is cryptic and says her father's name is Sebastian. That's her brother's name too, but he's drowned and dead. Sebastian still hasn't figured it out. He says that if "Cesario" were a woman, he would look just like his long lost sister Viola, who is dead. Viola then says her father had a mole on his face and Sebastian says gee, my dad had a mole on his face, too. When Viola announces that her dad died on her thirteenth birthday, Sebastian finally understands that "Cesario" is in fact his sister, Viola. Finally, Viola says what she should have said long before--"I'm Viola dressed as a boy. I'd put my girl clothes back on now but I left them with the sea captain who fished me out of the ocean so I'll have to stay in these clothes." Sebastian looks at Olivia and says it's lucky for her that she married him instead of "Cesario." Otherwise, she would have mistakenly married a woman when she thought she was marrying a man. As it is, she's now married to both a man and a woman . Orsino tells Olivia not to worry about this turn of events, because Sebastian comes from noble blood, which means Olivia hasn't just married a servant boy after all. And, Orsino says, he stands to gain here, too. Orsino turns to Viola, and calls her "boy" and reminds Viola of all the times "Cesario" told him "he" loved him. Viola confirms that yes, she is totally in love with Orsino. Orsino grabs her hand and says he wants to see her in her "woman's weeds" . Viola says she can't do it because the sea captain's got her clothes and Malvolio is holding the sea captain prisoner. Olivia says she'll take care of Malvolio. She calls for him and Feste gives her the letter Malvolio wrote while imprisoned in the dark room. Feste says Malvolio's possessed by the devil, but, when he reads the letter aloud to Olivia, Olivia knows something's up. Orsino turns to Viola and says she doesn't have to be his servant anymore--lucky girl, she gets to be his wife now. Fabian trots out Malvolio, who says that he did everything in Olivia's letter so she shouldn't have locked him in prison for doing what she asked. Olivia tells Malvolio that she didn't write the letter he's just shown her. That's Maria's handwriting. She tells Malvolio that when they figure out who's been pranking him, he can dole out the justice to make things right. Fabian jumps in and explains that he and Toby were just having a laugh. Toby convinced Maria to write the letter and married her as a reward for a job well done. Now, they should all just laugh at the outcome since Malvolio and the others all insulted each other equally. Malvolio doesn't see the humor in the situation. He runs off and swears he'll get revenge. Olivia says that poor Malvolio really got the raw end of the deal, but nobody really seems to care about Malvolio's feelings. Except that they need him to tell them where the Captain is so they can get Viola's clothes. Duke Orsino says that Viola will "be" Cesario until she changes out of her boy's clothes. But, when she puts her dress back on, she'll be his woman and they'll have the weddings. Everyone exits except the fool, who sings a silly--but kind of sad--song about growing up. It's about how things change as you get older and yet, life just keeps rolling on, with the rain coming every day. The last lines are happy though, as he say that the play is done and that the players will always strive to make their audience happy.