No one is perfect. It's normal for a romantic partner to sometimes point out your flaws if they affect him or the relationship. However, a disrespectful partner will lecture you constantly about even minor, inconsequential flaws. He will also sound less concerned and more demeaning.  In a respectful relationship, your boyfriend may say something like, "Could you not text as much while we watch TV? I just like to have you present." If your boyfriend is being disrespectful, his reaction will be more over the top. Instead of asking nicely that you don't text during certain times, he will lash out and start lecturing you about your flaws. For example, "This just shows how you can't concentrate on anything. I think this is why you've been having so much trouble at school lately. Your professors are probably as frustrated with you as I am." A disrespectful boyfriend is often very controlling and domineering in his behavior. During interactions, you  may feel your boyfriend will not let you have your way. He may have an "It's my way or the highway" mentality, and act out when things don't go the way he wants.  A disrespectful boyfriend may, for example, take major issue with you seeing friends without him. He may berate you and question this decision, saying things like, "Your friends are so boring. Why do you need to see them so much?" While he may not directly forbid you from going, he may do things to make your night difficult. For example, he allows you to see a movie with your friend Maggie, but texts and calls the whole time in the theater. He may also let you grab coffee with a friend, but cold shoulder you when you get home. Compromise is important to any healthy relationship. Your boyfriend should occasionally be willing to meet your needs, just as you've met his. You may feel like you always end up doing things your partner's way, whether you want to or not.  In a normal relationship, people compromise on things like taste. You may, for example, go see a movie you don't really want to see, but then eat dinner at your favorite restaurant afterwards. With a disrespectful boyfriend, everything will be about him. If you try to say "No" or offer a compromise, he simply berates you until he gets his way. For example, he wants to go hiking for your anniversary. You're not much of a hiker, but propose a short, easy hike as you've never gone before. Instead of agreeing, he keeps complaining that he loves long hikes and a short hike will be boring for him until you eventually agree to go on the shorter hike. Is your boyfriend quick to anger? Does he create a generally hostile atmosphere in your home? If you feel unsafe when around him, and feel as if you need to walk on eggshells constantly, he may be disrespecting you. A chronically disrespectful person will not own up to the fact his behavior has hurt others. Most people apologize for their shortcomings or try to change them. A disrespectful person will never take full responsibility for himself.  Your boyfriend may refuse to apologize for even little things. For example, he's consistently late but is always making excuses such as "There was traffic" and "I was stressed, so I lost track of time." He may also make excuses for major aspects of disrespect. For example, "I'm sorry I yelled at you, but you don't get the pressure I've been under lately." He may even go as far as to blame you. For example, "I would be more respectful about you seeing your friends if I felt more valued in the relationship."
Think about whether your partner lectures you. Consider whether you feel controlled or dominated. Think about whether your boyfriend is ever willing to compromise. Watch out for angry outbursts. Evaluate whether your boyfriend ever takes responsibility for his actions.