KHOZA MGOJO
I will just add on to what Dr Mgojo has said with regard to your health.  Many a times when we have been harassed or tortured psychologically it is difficult for one to see or realise that he or she needs help.  I do realise from your statement that you do have certain symptoms of being psychologically tormented.  Now, from that it can be seen that you do need help.  Now, I have been looking at what happened to you when you were still very young.  Your house was attacked, you were detained, you went into solitary confinement, you embarked on a hunger strike, as well as house arrest.  This is too much to happen to one person and that the person should remain unaffected.  I think you should get some attention.