FERDINAND BARNARD
No Chairperson, the reason why I did this was because I had no respect for them and I hated myself and I could not believe that I received instructions from people like Danie Phaal.  He was the Head of the CCB, who came to me and told me exactly what I must do, but when he saw something that could possibly be a conviction or a charge against him, he drove to the Attorney-General to make a statement.  And these are the same people who are recces who kill hundreds of people and even if it's a greenpeace overall that they find, they'll still run to the Attorney-General to testify against their comrades.
	It was these people who were our recces.  If tomorrow he ends up in a war situation and to protect our loved ones, then I'd say Sir, that person who is the big recce guy would sell us out for a tin of bully-beef.  I have got no respect for them.  The same counts for the politicians.  
	It's not about getting out of jail now or prison, I just want them to recognise me.  I want them to say, "yes I know this person", as Siphiwe Nyanda did.  Where's the threat?  There's no more threat for these people, but they are still not doing it.  The Bible says you have to forgive seventy times seven.  I feel about it in this way, Kevin Woods and Eugene de Kock feel the same way, but they still deny it.  We did everything on our own.  Eugene de Kock took 18 people and attacked Lesotho.  And the morning I woke up and I threw names in a hat and I pulled it out and I thought I'll kill David Webster today.  It doesn't work like that and that is why I feel like this.