College
A highly expensive institution ran by fascist liberals. Ridiculously easy to get into, except for the stuck up ivy league college that doesn't really have anything special aside from its name.

The Pros:
-After four years of of bullshit, you'll get a piece of paper which will help you get a job
-Alcohol flows like water
-A higher concentration of easy women than in a ghetto
-Drugs are just a skip and a hop away

The Cons:
-After four years of of bullshit, you'll get a piece of paper which will help you get a job
-The professors are stuck up assholes
-The elitists (feminists, pro-gay supporters, etc) are stuck up assholes
-The liberal arts students are stuck up assholes
-The classes you are forced to take are bullshit
-The extreme work is bullshit

Basically, the cons outweight the pros, but you have no choice, but to go there. Fortunately, alcohol and drugs might help you through. Unfortunately, alcohol and drugs might get you kick out.
Hmm, where to go to? Harvard, MIT, Yale, Princeton, some private college near me, or my local community college?

Eh, some private college near me. It's closer, cheaper, and they all teach the same thing anyway.