trojan war
A war 3000 years ago, which actually probably never happened and is really a load of fuck made up by a Greek Nerd with small genitalia - i'm sure he had a statue commisioned which proves it - (but I'm not complaining because the movie was cool) between the Trojans and the Greeks, who got beat down for most of it and had to use a giant wooden, horse shaped dildo for the greek king with men inside to act as sperm, but who he forgot about and gave to the Trojans as a peace gift when he needed a bigger toy to win, as well as a lot more soldiers (but to be fair the Trojans did have massive walls to defend them and to fire arrows off).  The Trojans were too pissed and comatose to give a fuck about the horse so they let it in because they fought apollo creed gave it to them as a gift for raping the hell out of the Greeks for most of the time and stealing their bitches.  
Who the fuck is sad enough to look Trojan war up?