red and brown mile
When you shit your pants at a night club with your friends and then have to walk home because you don't have a car and you know you would get kicked out of a cab or bus. When your shit sticks to your inner thighs after a few miles of walking, the chafing starts to bleed and by the end of the night you're washing blood and shit off your body after your soul has been crushed.
Steve: "Man, what happened to you Saturday night?"
Charlie: "Too much tequila after that burrito and I couldn't reach the toilet."
Steve: "Gross."
Charlie: "Worse. Dave wouldn't drive me home so I walked a red and brown mile."