Ahmed
Ahmed. The most amazingly perfect person you could ever meet. He is perfect in every way, and every person he meets adores him. He is loved by so many, yet loves only one other more than his own life. An Ahmed always has beautiful eyes and isn't afraid to use them to his advantage. Even though he loves only one other, he will flirt with people of the opposit sex. He also has a big penis and is a good loyal boyfriend. If you know an Ahmed, look after him. He is the greatest treasure you could have.
Me: Hey, is his name Ahmed?

Friend: It must be, look how unbelievably perfect he is!