human pterodactyl virus
HPV - A virus commonly mistaken for the less popular Human Papillomavirus.

Human Pterodactyl Virus comes from watching Pterodactyl's, live or dead, for more than 3 consecutive hours. After 3 consecutive hours, you're head bursts and transforms into a Pterodactyl's head, and you make high pitched screeching noises at random. Wings may or may not protrude from the victims back, as this hideous malformation comes from watching Pterodactyl's, live or dead, for more than 3 consecutive hours with a pink or green wine bottle on your head.
"His wing span had become over 30 feet after he was diagnosed with Human Pterodactyl Virus"

"I don't talk to that nasty mug, he has Human Pterodactyl Virus"

"Human Pterodactyl Virus caused him to drive the bus into the wall at 50 miles an hour while screeching at an ear-bleeding level."