Ass-miles
1:  A unit of measurement designed to express the level of experience of a sexually explicit nature, most often used in the profession of butt-pirating. 

2:  A reference to any distance transversed that requires unnecessary amounts of effort.
1:  "I say, Nigel, wouldn't you agree that Ian has attained more ass-miles than Christian on their butt-pirating expeditions?"
"Mmm, quite."

2:  Taylor put up a rather large fuss, one that was quite warranted for the amount of ass-miles he was required to bike.