Uncle gugemiser
Sexual act in which the freezes his excrement in a plastic bag for a one week period. Afterwards, the plastic wrap is removed, and the woman uses it as a penetration device for masturbation.
Man: Hey babes, wanna do an UNCLE GUGEMISER?
Woman: Hell yeah!

- 1 Week later -

Man: Awww yeahh
Woman: OH MY GOD ITS MELTING!