Buttshoes
Shoes for your butt. Come in all different styles and sizes. They are capable of being strapped on around the waist with the soles facing the location at which the person will sit. Buttshoes are a brand new innovation that will someday be the latest fashion craze.
Joe: Hey dude, what are you doing?

Connor: Just strapping on my buttshoes so I'll be ready for to watch the game tonight.

Joe: Are you gonna sit on your girlfriend's face with them later?

Connor: You know it!