foot canoe
A stupidly big shoe.  When someone's shoe is so mammoth it is as if they're sailing down the street in those gargantuan laced souls.
The only shoes the little asian lady could find to wear were Shaq's slippers, so she walked out to get the mail in a pair of foot canoes.

Big-foot went to the shoe store where Al Bundy fit his tootsie with a foot canoe.