Canada's History
An erotic sexual act to welcome the end of winter and the coming of the spring. The woman is cradled in the majestic antlers of a fallen moose, reciting Margaret Atwood poetry. A mountie lovingly drizzles warm maple syrup all over her body. The mountie then kneels before the woman, representing the sovereignty of the queen, and selflessly performs cunnilungus on her. When she has come once, he uses a dildo in the shape of Ryan Gosling's penis (which is large) until she ejaculates into the Stanley Cup. The mountie then gladly drinks the warm liquid and sings "Oh Canada."
In April, Steven Harper performed Canada's history in the role of the mounty in parliament.