Jonathan
The most amazing guy in the world. He is sexy, funny, and athletic all at the same time. He won't beat up anyone unless he is provoked. There is nothing wrong with him. He is also a sex-god. His muscles bulge from his body. He is the right man to go out with. He will own you in any competition without even trying. Spec-fucking-tacular.

(He doesn't go out with sluts though, you sluts)
Oh yes Jonathan! (Orgasm)