log and a wink
The act of taking a shit when a log hits the cold water and immediately splashes back up at your asshole creating a "wink". Probably one of the worst things ever...
Abacus: hey BJ ill be right back ima go take a shit
BJ: cool have fun
Abacus: AHHHH!
BJ: what happened? are you ok?
Abacus: ya, just a log and a wink
BJ: oh understandable