Tag Archives: making habits stick
Transforming Resolutions to Lasting Habits, Part 1
Negative Emotions, or “Adventures in Insomnia…”
Transforming Resolutions into Lasting Habits, Part 2, the Science of Sustainable Change
Last week, I shared three proven ways to successfully transform a resolution into a sustainable habit:
1. Pick one thing at a time
2. Give yourself two months
3. Start easy.
Click here to read more about the first three in detail.
I am offering a free teleclass on forming lasting habits THIS EVENING (Jan 5, 2012) at 6pm PT/9pm ET. Sign up here and I’ll send call-in details.
Here are five more scientifically supported methods for making lasting change in your life:
4. Do the activity at the same time every day. Decide exactly what you are going to do and commit to a specific time to do it. Put it on your calendar and protect that time. Multiple studies have shown that committing to a specific activity at a specific time doubles the likelihood of the committed action being performed. We’re simply more likely to follow through when we decide ahead of time how and when it’s going to happen. Over time, by performing the action at the same time each day, our bodies and minds adapt and prepare for the action. This helps lock in new neuro-pathways more quickly, allowing the new habit to become more automatic and unconscious. Whether it’s going on a jog as soon as you wake up, meditating immediately after dinner or writing in a gratitude journal right before bed, commit to exactly what you want to do and when you are going to do it.
5. Reduce the activation energy for habits you want and increase it for habits you don’t want. This simply means take away any barriers from the activities you want to do and increase the barriers to habits you want to break. For example:
Decide your morning workout plan before you go to bed. Sleep in your (clean!) workout clothes. Put your shoes right next to your bed. Have your gym bag fully packed and by the door with your car keys and wallet. With no decisions to make in your groggy morning state, you’ll be much more likely to get up and do it.
Store the TV remote control in the closet. Ask yourself during those 20 seconds it takes to fetch it, whether TV is really what you want to do with your time. Even better — put that book you want to read in the place you usually put the remote. See how it changes your behavior.
6. Visibly track your progress. You can control what you measure. I used a sticker chart to get my kids to do their morning routines and it worked so well for them that I adapted it for my own use. Each day that I perform the habit I’m trying to develop, I get a sticker on the blank calendar page taped to my bathroom mirror. It’s empowering to see my success (“Hooray! I meditated for 3 whole minutes! Sticker for me!”). Sometimes I offer myself prizes – a night out dancing or a visit to Dave & Busters — if I can get a certain number of stickers in a month (notice I didn’t set my expectation as “every day”; cut yourself some slack and realize that missing a day – or three – isn’t a deal-killer.) If shiny little stickers are a bit too silly for you, find some way of visibly tracking your progress. The key here is that you put it in a place you’ll see it multiple times per day (on the fridge, in the hallway, in your written calendar, next to computer screen, etc.) and that you have some way to track whether you made it or not each day. It will remind and motivate you to stick with that new routine as it develops into a habit.
7. Get social support. When you are committed to developing a new habit, tell some good friends, your partner or roommate. Ask for their support and encouragement. This is a role I play for my clients; when they tell me specifically what they are going to do, they are more successful at doing it. It’s simply in our nature to follow through on commitments when made to others. Even better is to have a buddy who is trying to integrate the same new habit. You can do the activity together, if feasible, but a regular check-in can make a huge difference as you forge ahead. This is particularly powerful in helping you through those days where motivation is not coming naturally. Social support is an amazing thing.
8. Commit to it. Once you’ve decided to develop a new habit, the most important thing is that you commit to it. Really commit. Visualize what success would look like and what benefits you’d receive by incorporating this new habit into your life. Then take the time to make a detailed plan of what you are going to do and when. Start easy and build up to your goal in small steps over time. Then lock it into your schedule for at least two months. Create a way to track your success and pull together a team of people who want you to be successful. Throw your backpack over the wall so there’s no going back, and then start climbing! Good luck!!!
Negative Media: Is it worth the cost?
Form Lasting Habits, Part II
Form Lasting Habits, Part I
So, you’ve decided it’s time to make a change — to start meditating or writing in a gratitude journal or to add more mood-boosting exercise to your week. So you decide, start doing it and then boom, you are fit, balanced and grateful. It’s that easy, right? No?
We’ve all had experiences of making a New Year’s resolution and letting it go before two weeks (two days?) have elapsed. Long-term, sustainable change is hard. We are creatures of habit; in fact studies suggest that only 5% of our actions are consciously chosen. We build strong neuro-pathways over years of repetition that make it so much easier to keep doing things the way we always have – flipping on the tv instead of meditating or pushing the snooze bar instead of going for a run. We have very limited stores of will and discipline to overcome that inertia of do-it-like-we-always-do.
The good news is that a lot of research has been done on ways to make change stick. With some concerted effort and focus, we can literally rewire our brain, developing and strengthening neuro-pathways towards habits that we want in our lives. Over time and with consistent practice, the new pathway can become the default, the path of least resistance. Then this new desired habit can become as ingrained as brushing your teeth before you go to bed.
Here are three proven steps to making lasting change. Next week, I’ll share four more ideas for forming lasting, constructive habits.
Pick one thing to change at a time. Seriously. Just ONE and commit to it. Developing a single new habit (and the neuro-pathways to support it) is hard enough. Trying to change more than one thing at a time dilutes your effort and significantly increases the likelihood of failing which can lead to losing a sense of control and potentially giving up on making any change. So prioritize the most important habit you want to bring into your life. If done right, these changes can last a lifetime.
Give yourself two months to make one change. The research shows that it takes 30-60 days to make a new habit stick — to fully rewire your brain. Give yourself enough time to really lock in the new desired behavior.
Start Easy. Take whatever goal you have, whatever habit you want to form and find an easy way to start – put on your running shoes and go out the front door, meditate for 60 seconds or do 5 minutes of uninterrupted writing. Stick with this initial goal for a few days. By setting, achieving and celebrating small victories, our brains get the message that we are on track, that we are making progress and that builds our confidence, our sense of control and our focus. Then add a little distance to your running or a little time to your meditation or focused writing. The key is to make each step easily do-able from where we are now.
“Incremental change is better than ambitious failure”
– Tony Schwartz, author of the Power of Full Engagement
Tune in next week for more proven ideas for making happiness –or any other – habits stick.