and i say to myself , callyanne , this is a good time to just pray and hope the lord hear you and see you right , and i went down on my knees , well , my knees are not so good any more , so i just put my hands together , but anyway , i still do n't find your number , but look at how you just phone me up , and that 's even better from some points of view , particularly because i ai n't made of money and i ca n't afford to go phoning no foreign countries even for something like this , although i was going to phone you , do n't you worry , given the circumstances- '' and she stopped , suddenly , either to take a breath , or to take a sip from the huge mug of too-hot coffee she always carried in her left hand , and during the brief quiet fat charlie said , `` i want to ask my dad to come to my wedding .