he drove on , and despite the pointed silence from the woman beside him , nicky 's sleeping face in the rear-view mirror ( 'teenagers do n't really do before eleven o'clock , ' tanzie explained ) and the occasional foul eruptions of the dog , it slowly dawned on him , as they crept closer to their destination , that he was feeling a complete lack of the relief he had expected to feel at the prospect of having his car , his life , back to himself .