I wanted a very small , destination wedding . Preferably on a beach somewhere with immediate family only . Instead , I let MIL convince me to have a giant 300 people wedding in a church . She also paid for most of it , but it wasn ' t what I wanted and was ridiculously stressful . The party was really fun , but I would have been just as happy if not happier eloping . My advice , do what you and your partner want and forget about what anyone else wants . We spent ~ 10 k total and I feel like it was a total waste . It really sucks that your dad was able to help with your brother ' s wedding and not yours . In my opinion , weddings are way overrated these days . <| sep |> Well , it ' s a philosophical thing to begin with , but it ' s government ' s and my own responsibility for enforcing it .