It sounds like that comment in isolation though definitely hurtful as she essentially said the only reason I didn ' t choose him is because I didn ' t want to hurt my friend isn ' t what has you thinking that you want to start over again with somebody else . I think it was more like the straw that broke the camels back . There are a lot of other things at play here that are clearly making you unhappy and that comment was just the trigger to make you feel like enough was enough . Did you stop therapy as a couple mutually or was it that one of you decided it wasn ' t working ? Have you discussed this type of stuff in your private therapy sessions as I know you mentioned you still go . Perhaps your therapist can help walk you through your desire to walk away to help you decide if it ' s the right choice for you and if it ' s what you truly want . Have you communicated to her how dire the situation has become in that you are questioning whether or not to stay in the marriage ? I would be telling her that you feel u n dervaluedunderappreciated and be honest about you feelings of being second choice . Discuss with each other what you both feel you need to be happy in this relationship and then compromise on what the both of you are willing to do for one another within reason to make things better . I would tell her that if you don ' t see improvement between you both within xamount of time that you aren ' t sure you can continue on in this relationship as it ' s clear you aren ' t happy and that isn ' t healthy for you as much as for your children