why did you post this twice ? <| sep |> Same here ! I feel like hanging with Josh and Chuck would be so much fun . I don ' t care where the conversation meanders to , I just like tagging along for the ride . <| sep |> A relationship is two people coming together and both of them being stronger for it . It sounds like he has been helping you with your issues , but is all the time and effort he ' s spending actually paying off for both of you , or just for you ? Are you returning that time and effort and attention and love he ' s giving , or just taking it ? It sucks to say , but sometimes you just have to be alone and figure your shit out before you can be in a healthy relationship . You don ' t want to be the one dragging the other person down , and until you get a stable baseline in your life which is hard to come by as a clinically depressed young 21 year old female it ' s hard to find a place where you can be both dealing with your own shit AND helping someone else deal with theirs and being there for them . I don ' t want to say break up with him , but I will say that you should be asking yourself if this relationship is going to make you more mentally healthy and if it is going to make HIS life better for having been in it . There ' s no shame in telling him that you might need some time alone to figure things out , there ' s no shame in sharing these fears and feelings with him and recognizing the effort and sacrifices he ' s had to make . And if you do decide to stick with it , make sure that you don ' t let your own shit get in the way of making him feel valued and loved and appreciated . It can be hard to even get out of bed , but when you ' re in a relationship you don ' t get to just sleep 18 hours a day and shower once a week and have someone bring you food all the time while you watch TV and stare at Facebook . You have to work at a relationship , and when you ' re depressed sometimes it ' s hard enough to work on staying alive much less adding a stressful relationship in there to add to the burden . If you aren ' t already , seek treatment for your mental health issues and then be open and honest with your boyfriend . Recognize your faults , recognize his strengths , and he should do the same in turn and help you figure out what you need to do to keep things working .