The transition from False Alarm to Reminder <| sep |> Well that was quite the roller coaster <| sep |> I forget how old I was , but I suspected he wasn ' t real for awhile . My mom always had us write a letter and leave out cookies on Christmas Eve , so I decided to keep what I really wanted a goldfish secret until it was time to write the letter . After she read it , she got a shocked look on her face and something like I ' m not sure Santa can do that . . The next day , I got a $ 1 in my stocking with a note saying he tried to bring one , but it would have frozen in the sled . I knew I had won , but when I think back on it now , I think my mom was really sad that I was growing up and Santa wouldn ' t come next year .