Would you do 18 issues in the 400 s ? <| sep |> Did you bother even reading the article ? <| sep |> Sometimes nonACONs cant relate as you mention when it comes to parents , especially if they have normal or good ones . They try and put themselves in your shoes but insert their own parental units where yours are , not intentionally but because that is what they know . This can mean they have some sympathy for your parents and not fully grasp the level of damage sustained by their actions , again just because they have no point of reference . He may be thinking that he is helping by telling you not to hold on to the grudge in order to heal , unaware that this course of action is what led to much of the continued abuse . Explain that you hold onto it because it protects you , and prevents you from reentering the cycle of abuse with the Narcs . Often times to forgive and forget with a Narc means you are an easy target for them to take advantage off . Internet hugs .