The only reason you ' ve stated that you want to have joint expenses is because it ' s easier . It ' s easier , how ? You find it annoying to have to write him a check or give him cash ? How much time does that really take you ? Let me give you some perspective . My exboyfriend insisted that we get a joint account . We still had separate accounts where our paychecks were deposited , but he wanted a joint account for joint expenses . I was hesitant , because I knew he was bad with money . But he was insistent , and I eventually caved . Since I made more money than he did , we also did a 6040 split . We calculated what our monthly expenses were , and we agreed upon an amount that we ' d each put into the joint account . Before we had a joint account , I was finally starting to build a savings . But suddenly I was constantly struggling for money , even though our split was the same . It didn ' t take too long to figure out what was going on . He was laundering money from the joint account . He wasn ' t straight up taking money from the ATM or transferring money to his account , that would be too obvious . Whereas before we ' d always go grocery shopping together , suddenly he was insistent on going by himself . He ' d come home with a small bag of groceries , with a huge charge to our joint account , and he just so happened to lose the receipt every single time . And every week we were running out of money in our joint account , so he ' d tell me that we needed to add more money to it . It ' s pretty clear what he was doing . When he was at the grocery store , he ' d use the cash back option and take out $ 40 or $ 60 , and pocket the money himself . Cash back at the grocery store doesn ' t show up on a bank statement . When we ' d go out to the bar with friends , I ' d be using my own card to pay for my drinks . Then I ' d notice when we were cashing out , that he was using our joint account to pay for his own drinks , saying that we were out together , so it was a joint expense , even though it was not what we agreed upon . If I tried to talk to him about his spending , he ' d blow up at me because how dare I talk about how he was irresponsible with his spending , how everything he did was for us , and shame on me for insinuating anything . An obvious case of projection . We eventually broke up when I caught him cheating on me . He went in and withdrew all of the money from the joint account , saying that he deserved it . I just saw it as the cost of getting this toxic person out of my life . And once the joint account was dissolved , guess what ? I suddenly found myself with extra money again after all of my bills were paid , even though I was now paying 100 % of the expenses for the 1 bedroom apartment we got together . I ' m not saying that if you guys get a joint account , that this will happen . But there is no reason why you need to have a joint account . I suspect that you see this as a sign of you two moving forward together . But you know what ? It ' s not . It ' s just a liability given that you guys aren ' t married . What you have going right now for your finances works for you . Drop the issue .